Hello everyone! I usually write stories that have something to do with blood and gore associated so that's mainly what you're going to get from me if you decide to read my stuff ^~^
Rainbow Dash, the proudest flyer to have ever come out of Cloudsdale, lived an exciting and adventurous life whether it be with her best friends or by herself. But all that changes one fateful night when she is plunged into nightmares each time she falls asleep. Will she be able overcome the gruesome trials each night? Or will her life come to an unfortunate end?
Special thanks to NicholazLikesPoniez for giving me yet another beautiful idea for a story!
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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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This can only end well.
1729911 ^^^^
This.
1729911 How dare you.
Intriguing
Piqued my interest; watching!
Everything seems to be in check apart from the rule of quotations.
I am certainly going to enjoy this story.
I also hope that this story won't start to haunt my account like your last did.
You have gained my interest with this story it looks like its going to be fun to read.
*Twitch*
Could be interesting.
Even if the Adjudicator seems a bit randomly malicious.
Thank you all!
I'm quite elated to see that you are all interested! 
Even though you told me the basic plot, I still feel like this was unexpected
HEEEELP!!!
Your stories are cursed. They keep saying that there is a new chapter when there is none.
1733807 I think I know why it does that
I have a friend who signs onto my account when I'm done writing and she likes to grammer nazi everything, when she's done editing it probably says that there's a "new chapter"
1733912
Would that be Emily by any chance? I could really use her Grammar Nazi skills when I speed type
1734775 No emily's username is CaramelSwirls
1735053
So who checks it for you?
1735088 Emily does
1735096
>.< you're confuddling me now 
You just said no
1735138 Lol I thought you were asking if skultech was emily
1735148
I don't even see that name or know who it is lol
Anyway, loving the story, I feel like the voice she hears is someone we know.
Interesting
1735148 WHAT!!!!!!!!!
That doesn't even make sense.
1735194 FYI I am skultech and that was just a case of xrez trolling you.
Love the story though.
1737464
Trust me I have taught him the way of the troll. He just talked as though I knew you though
1740566 Well now you do and WHAT WERE YOU THINKING TEACHING HOW TO TROLL!!!!!!!
1743557
I was thinking of how it helps others troll
1746834 Like yourself?
Oh this keeps getting better and better.
Nice way of keeping suspense with RD asking who the adjudicator is you tease.
Ooo~ This is interesting. Let's see what the next one is, shall we?
I'll be keeping an eye on this. Have a mustache!
xD This chapter reminded me a lot of Saw, actually XD
Oh god, the spelling. What happened to it? I don't see any <" "> and it's extremely confusing.
Where have all the """"""""""""""""""""""""""""" gone to
SOMEONE STOLE THEM!!!!!!!!!!
1776566 Yes yes I apologize
I was writing this last night but the site went down for maintenance 
So I copied it to a word document, but it turns out it didn't save the "..." 
So I sincerely apologize! It should be all fixed now though 
1776722 Above
I think the sudden reveal wasn't particularly good. What was the justification for that, anyway?
1827543 What do you mean by sudden reveal?
Is their going to be a next chapter
1827886 Of course
But not yet 
Ok thanks for getting back to me
I think that I'll have to agree with Arkenai, at least in part. What I believe that he was saying is that he didn't like how Dash remembers everything, tells the princesses, and then refuses their help. Maybe it would be better to develop it more? The tape had plenty for the princess to go off of, maybe she could have done some research to find out the reasoning behind it. It was unique having Dash scared and unsure, feelings that she's rarely felt before.
The dream scene with Fluttershy was very good, however, I did not really like the fact that Dash is suddenly fine with everything. I thought that it made the story more interesting when she was slowly disintegrating throughout the story. She now hasn't slept for five nights and that alone (without the fear of death or one's friends) would be enough to seriously mentally impede most people. Not only is Dash not getting any sleep, but she's almost died for the last five nights!
The last "reality" section made it seem like Dash was completely fine; she wasn't tired, nor was she scared of any of her friends, so in my opinion, I didn't think that was very realistic when you put yourself in her shoes. When I write, I try to put myself in their place and see how I would react. Imagine if you were Dash how would you be feeling and how would you act after everything that you've experienced in this story.
These are just my thoughts and are meant to be constructive criticism. No offense is meant here, I seriously do like your story! Write whatever you want; don't feel the need to use all, if any, of my feedback if you don't like it. It's your story; just roll with it!
Keep up the great work!
1828488 Yes I see what you're saying, however when I write I try to make the characters personalities as close as possible to how they actually are in the show. This being said, Rainbow Dash was clearly terrified in reality but she didn't know why, which is the main reason for that. If you notice in the nightmare, she isn't so much scared when she faces Astaroth's trials, instead she is more so very arrogant/over confident, as to her actual personality from the show.
I understand that having her lose her mind in reality would provide... more tension in the story I suppose. But I wanted to portray Rainbow Dash as how she would actually act y'know? Terribly sorry if you found it disheartening
1828632 Thanks for replying and I'm glad that you explained your reasoning. I'll be looking forward to where this story goes!
1828488 1828632
RDash has covered exactly what I meant.
You've hit the nail right on the head. Props to you, sir.
This chapter was a bit less for me.
The trial itself felt a bit too peaceful compared to the rest.
Also it feels like the adjudicator is getting bored.
1830147 Well this was a Flutteshy trial and I wanted it to somewhat suit her in a way, and Astaroth has gone from hysterical to irritated because Rainbow Dash is actually proving she can beat him
1831455 I do hope he expresses his irritations a bit in a fun *cough*bloody*cough* way
1831521 Haha you'll have to wait and see
1831530 Ah bloody hell
1831533 Where's the fun in spoilers my friend?
Oh yes finally the next chapter is here.
Also I can't wait for RD to fight against herself.
sorry it dosnt make enough sense for me, aniway have fun! im out
xD That was an epic fight! Prolly my favorite chapter so far