• Member Since 16th Sep, 2012
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Comments ( 92 )

A surprising twist for an FO:E story, to add more humor in the dark wasteland. It looks like you know what you're doing, and I can't wait for more! Keep it up!

"the Cult of Discord"?
Aw man, I thought no one else had that idea yet! :raritycry:
...Can I still put a similar thing in my FO:E fic? :fluttershysad:


Go for it. Trust me, half the stuff you're thinking of right now has already been done, so don't sweat it if something similar pops up, it's bound to happen. Besides, in all likelyhood, you're going to handle it differently than I will.

THE TARDIS! THE FREAKIN TARDIS! I'm sold!. :pinkiehappy:

Can't wait for more!! literally I'm going berserk for it!

Tricky is definitely related to Trixie and on a further note the virtue of boasting must run in the family:trixieshiftright:
I hope Tricky gets more bad ass next chapter

Comment posted by ClickClackTheBrony deleted Dec 11th, 2012


I know :3 It's not going to show up for a while, but what I have planned is definitely going to be worth the wait.


Don't worry, the next chapter is right around the corner. I have the rough draft of everything up through four already written.
As for Tricky, he was actually based on Ricky from Honest Hearts, but you're right, it really could go either way. Who knows, maybe they are related!

Woo! New chapter! Pretty good one, too. A nice side-adventure before we get into a serious chapter, as foreshadowed by your comments... Can't wait!

You managed to type a "Scooby-doo doors" gag... That's it, where do I sing-up to be a pre-reader.


You got skype? Look me up, I'm called Clickclackthebrony there too.

I've got wild wasteland on all of my Fallout saves, and I haven't even experienced one paranormal thing yet! :raritydespair:

Anyway, I was scrolling through the EqD sidestories post, and this one stood out to me, probably due to my lack of luck with the Wild Wasteland perk.

Anyway, I can't wait to read this, so I'll report back when I have!:twilightsmile:


Thank you for trying it :3

As for the WW trait, You should see one when you do Barton Thorns unmarked quest, and Old World blues is full of them. Keep in mind that they aren't exactly paranormal, usually old movie references that you might not get.

1928919 Ah, there's my problem, with WW.

I'm too tight to buy DLC's.
Whelp, I'm here, so I'll get started and feed back when I'm done!


I got the special editions that have DLCs included. Trust me though, they are totally worth it... Except Honest Hearts, which is only worth it for Joshua Graham, the perks, raised level cap, and Joshua Graham.

:pinkiegasp:WOW.That was really good.Can't wait for more:pinkiehappy:

Chapter 3 is going through some heavy editing, and a prereader broke his computer, but it should be out soon enough.:raritywink:

1980049 :fluttershysad: that's a shame.I had a friend who had the same thing happen to him. I look forward to it anyway when it gets sorted out :scootangel:

Does it make me a bad person for likeing that whole toture scene?

2289379 cdn.memegenerator.net/instances/400x/16045297.jpg
Congratulations! Welcome to the club! We have refreshments on the table in the back: punch, soda, orphan tears, etc.

... I have no idea who that is in that picture, by the way.

Comment posted by Genghis deleted Mar 20th, 2013

Well that was awesome.

We aim to please :pinkiehappy: Since you were nice enough to comment, I think I'll give you a status update :raritywink:The next chapter is going through a minor rewrite at this point and I'm also writing a separate one shot project for a contest, but chapter five should be out faster than chapter 4 was.

"I wasn't even sure what kind of spells there were that were meant for repairponies"

Hee. Anne from We're No heroes has one of those. The ability to reshape materials, and to magically follow circuits, and even remotely, use the reshaping ability on the route she's tracing like that.
She also has a very convenient cleaning spell for her coat.

"Nearly every unicorn I had ever met had at least some magic beyond levitation. It was useful, but I can't imagine getting too much done with just that. It was like being only half a unicorn."

Except if your name is Littlepip, I imagine. Then it's more like being half an alicorn :pinkiehappy:

Oh, and Stellar is totally a mind reader, isn't she? Might even be a subconscious mind reader :pinkiegasp:

"Hey, I had a good reason! I had to take care of my farm. Farmville is a demanding game!"

Haahaha wow. Stable Killed By Farmville. Brilliant :rainbowlaugh:

2452581 Lol, Yeah I didn't really think much into repair spells. I Just gave him communications and ran with it.

Just imagine the look on Click's face if he finds out that little tidbit about the Wasteland's savior.

Actually, Stellar's coincidental thoughts are just a running gag this chapter to show how in tune they are, sorry. Ironically, Chapter 5 does involves a lot of mind reading, hint hint :raritywink:

A Stable destroyed by Farmville: Just imagine if someone reads that out of context!

Thanks for commenting :pinkiehappy:

I saw that "Down with the sickness" quote there in the prolouge, I seed it ;))))))))

You know, the cover to this really reminds me of the song,"Ratfinks" by white zombie. Any beavis and butthead fans know what I'm talking about ;))))) Click didn't happen to drink cactus juice, did he?

2515977 All I remember about Beavis and Butthead is Cornholio and that their laughs creeped me out when I was a kid. Sorry. But who knows, I might see an episode in the near future and decide it deserves a place in here.

This chapter feels like it should've been called "below her garden" :derpytongue2: (though in a way, that IS 'beyond', I guess)
(on a related note, I love that song, and thank you for linking to the original, and not to any of the remixes!)

On to the story! I had a blast with this :pinkiehappy:

"Yes! Finally, someone else who understands as well as Chess does!"

Hah. Impervious to sarcasm.

Heh. Dem Three Old Ladies :pinkiehappy:

"Every source I'd heard of believed that, while powerful, Discord was just a historical figure, no different than countless similar threats to Equestria that had popped up over the years."

Poor lad. You have no idea! :rainbowlaugh:

“Well, he’s dead,” Chess said, shrugging.

haha. Wow. There's really no one who likes that guy, is there? :rainbowlaugh:

'I was sent as an ambassador from the utopia of the Surface World. Bow before my glory!'

That can't end well :rainbowderp:

Oh gods. Mole ponies. Brilliant!

And it keeps us safe from all the horrors above
Assuming there are any horrors above

Hah, lol :rainbowlaugh:

"but now that I know it's safe, I gotta see some of it when I get the chance!"

Umm... I think this guy needs a little more warning about the surface. Lack of radiation is hardly the same as "safe" :rainbowderp:

“As you wish, Your Surfaceness”

These guys are hilarious :rainbowlaugh:

"His cutie mark appeared to be nothing more than a pile of junk, which seemed odd, considering his role."

I get the feeling that simply not having anything mushroom, insect or digging related already makes him special :rainbowlaugh:

King Soilsifter, huh? Welp. That's a pretty regal sounding name for a mole pony, I guess :pinkiehappy:

"Most of the cast is simply due to the fact that Mountainhill is a notorious alarmist."

Hah! :rainbowlaugh:

...cold water? wat? :trixieshiftleft:

"I used to explore the Abandoned Caverns all the time back when they were still just the Seldom Used Caverns."

Hah. I love the way these guys name things :pinkiehappy:

"Super Hard Ant Reaver Thing"

Yup. Still loving it :rainbowlaugh:

"However, only the abdomen on the left produced the Fiery Ant Reaver Things we were familiar with, the other instead produced ants with two abdomens and no heads"

This had me laughing so much harder than it should have :rainbowlaugh:

"I reshaped the plate into a thin bar and shoved it under the ants’ chins, then lifted it up with all the force I could bring forth, flipping them onto their backs."

force field based melee weapons? Epic :rainbowdetermined2:

"a gecko destroying a small city of dollhouses"


-There's a load of places where the transitions from quotes to narration are missing their separating spaces. I think it's a Google Docs import issue.
-You also got a load of mismatched quotation marks... some are fancy curly “” ones, others are normal "" ones. This is usually caused by writing in Word (which replaces the quotes by the fancy ones) and using fimfic to edit later. I'd say, either replace them all with straight ones, or go through them and copy the correct curly ones to all places that need em.

> and amole pony mare
"and [a mole] pony mare"
> I gotta pay ‘me back fer what they did to mah wing.
"pay [‘em] back"
> than it’d be selfish not to
"then"? Or is this his accent or something?
> our adventure in Stable97
Needs a space between "Stable" and "97".
> Shovel stomped a hoof, imbedding it into the dirt.
> There was no joy in the laughter. It was the laugh of someone who had just realized that life was a joke and loss was the punch line.
This part needs to be un-italicized
> every bit of garbage he’d picked up on the way here , and Knight dropped a few land mines
Remove the space before that comma
> Or some reason, the ant was going down a different tunnel!
[For] some reason
> "I have so much to learn about you unicorns! and your magic once we're done with this adventure!"
That exclamation mark in the middle, after "unicorns", seems like it shouldn't be there.
> the other one imbedding itself in her neck
Again, embedding :p
> “Carrot.”Easy.
Another missing space after the quote, there.

2625048 *whistles* Now THAT was a critique.

The one thing I really regret is the cold water joke... It was a reference to Fluttershy's fake pony pox, but I think it was a bit forced.

Boaris and the mole ponies are DEFINITELY gonna get out sooner or later, and no worries about radiation, they're slightly resistant... everything else will probably kick their asses though. I actually made a mole pony race for the FOE PnP game, although I'm sure they got some balance issues. Thanks for reading :3

"with a quick levitation spell I threw him at her, horn first."

Unicorn javelin throwing as offensive technique... that is brilliant :pinkiehappy:

"Now what are the chances of finding a random pair of abandoned pre-apocalypse glasses that were not only a perfect fit for my head, but also exactly the kind I needed for my eyesight?"

The answer: Discord :facehoof:

"(I can’t tell you how I managed to combine two machetes into a better one, it’s a trade secret.)"

Don't question it! :pinkiecrazy:

"except this time she brought the camera with her, severing it from its connection to the wall."

...this is a Portal reference, isn't it? Indestructible cameras, severed with teleporting tricks :trixieshiftright:

My prereaders have taken to calling me "Murderer"

Seriously? This is Fallout: Equestria. Any funny stuff and sweet moment is just a temporary relief from the cold, hard truth of the Wasteland. I found this really heartwrenching, but I realize all too well events like this just need to be there to be true to the source material... to show people what the Wasteland is really like, and how easily it breaks people. Click seems to have a really, really dark side in him, and it's not buried as far as I'd expected, either :twilightoops:

Stay true, stay classy, and stay funny, ClickClack. This chapter was amazing.

> and charge 50 caps each let people through
"50 caps each [to] let people through"
> looking just as confidant as Chess
Should be "confident". "Confidant" is a person you confide in, not an adjective.
> The Winksteppers went raider us
"went raider [on] us"
> As the last notes of an angry, guitar heavy song finally faded away, a voice spoke up
Missing period behind this.
> keeping the third one from my latest victim on hand
on HOOF, silly!
> So… You’re on my side I take it?
An ellipsis acts equivalent to a comma, so no capital letter after that.
> I swallowed fearfully and asked
Missing space after this
> I twisted the glass around, "You only care about
This should have a period instead of that comma.

Huh, fimfic didn't give me any notification of your reply. It seems to be acting weird lately... I currently have a completely read and even completed fic standing in my unread updates for some reason, too :twilightoops:
(it all started when I finally found the time to start on your Chapter Two... your wild wastelandness is messing up my fimfic! :raritydespair:)

I kinda wished Boaris would've come with them... though I'm not sure how fast Mole ponies would walk on the surface, with their weird digging hooves.

Are they gonna be back later in the story, or not?

2629472 Sorry, I just bring the weird, I can't really control it.

I actually wrote this chapter as a sort of "padding" (I go into it more in the ch 3 author's notes), so the story was already mostly planned and Boaris was a little late to the game, but following Click out would TOTALLY be in character for him.

They will be reappearing though: Remember Hot Mess, from the writing contest? I'm planning more stories like that, and I think they definitely have potential for an adventure like that. It'd be a crime to do any less.

And they can walk just fine, don't worry.

2628998 Wow, I was worried how you'd react to her, but you really seem to get it :3 I am sorry I had to do that though.

Moleponies sidefic of Wild Wasteland? Sign me up :pinkiehappy:

Eh. Project Horizons is still one of my favourite sidefics. It'd be kinda hypocritical to whine about what you write when Somber abuses his characters way worse :rainbowwild:
(Also, I don't really pull my punches either in The Daily Unlife. I did let Lemon execute Misty's great-great-etc grandpa right in front of her :pinkiecrazy:)

2634342 It wont be fore a good while, but it will be worth it ;3

And I got through this one too! Whee!

"My special talent is concealing entrances, and hiding the door to this place was one of my best jobs, so just as long as nopony tries to leave and exposes the door, you guys will be completely safe."

Safehouse, Harry Potter style!

"Wow... Where the fudge did that come from?"

Holy carp, Knight is secretly a tactical genius? :pinkiegasp:

"We've been saving our best teleporters for this, guys who can combine their spells together and teleport a dozen ponies from here to anywhere in Baltimare."

So... why exactly haven't they winked into Canis' quarters and back and dumped him in some really bad place? Like, the middle of some irradiated lake, or something? :duck:

It was a dark thought, but I didn't want to waste any time with them in case anyone died.

"In the Wasteland, you need friends to survive... but not true friends. True friends just die, and make you stop wanting to survive."
-some crazy stallion that wandered into Stable One, to Lemon Frisk :unsuresweetie:

They were able to give us each plenty of dynamite and lighters

Okay, so they even HAVE their really bad place to dump Canis into. Really, light it all, and give it one express winkstepper-delivery to his bedroom? Or even better, dig some pit no one can get out of, dump it in, add one Canis through winkstepping? :rainbowderp:
These people really seem to have a need for Lemon Frisk's way of evaluating problems :rainbowwild:

"nopony wants to share a bed with you because it also means sharing one with whatever those things are that we can see crawling around in your fur"

Weren't they given a bath tub? She DIDN'T USE IT? :facehoof:

Canis vanished in a flash of light

Goddammit. I thought they'd know about it if he had managed to learn it too :twilightoops:
Seriously... should've just dumped the dynamite in there. No ponies, no one teleporting along, just dynamite. Preferably on the floors below and above him and in all adjacent rooms, so he wouldn't see any flashes and would be right in the middle of it :ajsmug:

Instead, she simply cast a spell, and suddenly we were elsewhere.

Figures the teleporters get the good gear... legion in the making.

"Where else in nature does this occur? Nowhere."

He'd be right, if not for the fact herds (and, in fact, humanity) evolved into a social group taking care of all individuals, to increase the whole group's chances of survival. And looking at old Equestria, it certainly worked :twistnerd:

I lit one of the explosives and launched it after him.

And he dies in exactly the way I suggested from the start, minus the convenient teleporting the stuff to him :ajbemused:

"their life's blood pooling in the void that should normally house my soul"

Oh gods, this guy is hilarious! :rainbowlaugh:

> for about half a year before finding New Appleloosa
There's a double space behind "year"
> When we got out there, everypony else
double space between "everypony" and "else"
> When she was done, Bishop added his own two bits
Missing period behind this sentence
> I let's just get a little bit of information
The "I" at the start shouldn't be there.
> even bringing in a washtub for us to bathe with
"to bathe [in]", not 'with'.
> There was one place we excelled, however
"excelled [in]". Also, I don't think you can substitute the "area" in "to excel in an area" with "place", since it's actually short for "area of expertise" in that context. In this, I'd just say "one thing we excelled in".
> Come on we need to get moving.
comma after "Come on"
> Calamity was on his feet again in a second
Feet? Try "hooves" :rainbowwild:
> if I wasn't confidant I could win anyway?
Again, "confident". "Confidant" is a noun, not an adjective.
> meant that it's bearer was a witness to the Legion's strength
"[its] bearer". Dammit, get it right! It's not hard :fluttershysad:
> Hey... Since you're going to be more open to trade
As I mentioned before, the ellipsis is functionally equivalent to a comma. It doesn't end a sentence, so no capital letter behind it.

2638232 Nice catches, I did not think of some of those! Looks like it's time to practice my "a wizard did it" skills :rainbowdetermined2::

Winksteppers killing Canis with teleportation- They had to wait for Click's help because "Minor characters may not kill villains without aid from a main character." This is outlined in the Geneva Conventions, and the Winksteppers are an honorable tribe who resolved not to break the laws of war.

Knight taking a bath- Whether she bathed or not was irrelevant, as whatever's infesting her can only be removed by a combination of pesticide, fire, and reading aloud from the bible.

Canis's "where else in nature does this occur" line- Canis single hoofedly killed a Hellhound and fights by swinging its severed hands around. Your argument is invalid.

P.S. Chapter 4 is in the prereading stage, so you wont have gotten through it for long.


P.S. Chapter 4 is in the prereading stage

Umm, I hope you mean Chapter 5? Prereading is normally before publishing :twilightoops:

PS: Tell your prereaders to argue less about their waifus and find more errors. That list I posted was embarrassingly long :rainbowwild:

2643089 Yeah, only two are editors actually. The others are there for opinions. I will tell them though.

the Dolewich Building

Oh gods. Should've seen that coming xD

"Great, now if I join Chess, I could probably push for a higher pay, but I'd probably be used as a mascot."

rofl, he is such a down-to-earth guy, for a unicorn :rainbowlaugh:

Heehe. Hello, Screwball.

The statue, one of Discord doing some kind of dance

Every day he's shufflin'!

"Rocky, LeFlour, Trunip, Lints-A-Lot."

Haaahaha wow. This keeps getting weirder xD

Sweet mother of children

lol. I'd say that's pretty redundant, if not for the fact it specifies that that specific mother has at least two :p

and he would use it to end hunger in the wasteland by supersizing all the fruit on the trees and making it rain chocolate milk, ushering in an era of peace, prosperity, and complete and utter anarchy.

Welp. Of all the possible things one could believe in out there... this isn't any less plausible than the others. And I like these guys' style :rainbowwild:

Wow. "The slaughtering healer". Quite a nickname you acquired there, Fluttershy :rainbowderp:

she thought it'd be slutty to wear see-thru clothing in public.

This Screwball is sublime :rainbowlaugh:

"Or is this mere industrial espionage from Solaris or Stein?"

Haa, Solaris. Can't do a Wild Wastelands fic without mentioning those guys :D

"'M.o.P.W.H.P.S.a.T.O.S.' ...Or you can just call me Oliver, since I can sense how scared your tongues just got."

I dunno. "Mop Whip Satos" kinda has a nice ring to it :rainbowwild:

"For some reason walls like this have been known to withstand attacks that turn power armor to slag"

Pfff, game logic :rainbowlaugh:

"That's what I love about you organics, no targeting computers, just the Force, or whatever it is you use."

Haaha, wow. That came out of nowhere. Just the fact he thinks organics need something to replace the concept of 'targeting computers'... brilliant :pinkiehappy:

Well, nopony except Screwball, who had to be convinced to stop hugging me before she let me move.

Squishy ghoul hugs! Gotta love 'em :rainbowwild:

Bwaahaha. A "T party" :rainbowlaugh:

This was awesome. You still rock, man. Keep on rocking :coolphoto:

Some Corrections:
> It's been a couple while since I was here.
a couple while?
> to whether I would accept it if he offered, my mind was too occupied
That comma after "if he offered" should be a semicolon.
> Besides that boredom was easily countered
Comma behind "besides".
> Suddenly, Screwball popped in front of us, grinning wildly.
You kinda never mentioned her name before this. Click shouldn't know it yet. Fix that!
> especially ¬¬¬that bastard Deadshot Calamity...
What's with the ¬¬¬?
> What that thing does is basically sends out a kind of spell
is basically [send] out

Oh right, forgot about this...

"When it rained bagels, that's free food for everypony! Radioactive coyotes can be seen glowing from a mile away, you'll be able to see them coming and escape them easier! The one who was selling Dash and Mint-als: Hello! Chems are bad! Everything the cultists have done has been helpful somehow!"

You forgot to add him asking how many STDs the ex-slut had been happily spreading around :rainbowwild:

2736598 Thanks again for the critique! Glad you liked it. I gotta keep watching some of those errors. They always pop up when I try to change lines. As for those weird L thingies though... I don't know where those were, or even what the fudge they are. Creepy.

Witty humor and references galore! I had to stop reading multiple times to get rid of the giggles.

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