Chapter 3
As he pulled up into the driveway, Trent quietly opened the garage door and pulled his bike in, glad to be out of the rain. He pulled down the garage door and entered the house. He passed through the kitchen, setting his keys on the counter, and went to the living room. He sat Vinyl on the center cushion of the couch, making sure he didn't wake her, and went to find a blanket. He grabbed the comforter from his bed and went back to the living room, draping it over her. She snuggled into it and sighed happily.
He walked into his room and sat on his bed, thinking about what had happened that evening. I... I just can't believe this... I always dreamed of having a Vinyl Scratch... But I never thought I'd get to have a living one! He felt like jumping for joy, like shouting at the top of his lungs, but he didn't want to wake the sleeping filly in the next room. Instead, he just sat with a silly grin on his face, staring into space as he thought of all of the fun he could have with Vinyl. But, as he went through how fun it would be to live with his favorite pony, he started to wonder how he was going to raise her. Hell, I've never had a pet of my own, how am I going to raise a cartoon pony that I know nothing about!? He got up and started pacing back and forth, thinking to himself, I'm gonna need help. But who in the world can I call to help me? He suddenly stopped and slapped hist fist down into his palm, saying, "Lewis. He's watched the show longer than I have. He's got more pony stuff than me. He must know a lot more about the show than me... I gotta give him a call, see if he can help me."
He slowly crept into the kitchen, passing the couch as quietly as he could, trying to not wake the sleeping pony. He picked up the receiver and dialed Lewis's cell number, hoping that he would answer. A few rings, and he was about to hang up when he heard a groggy voice say, “Hello?”
Trent put the receiver back to his ear, saying, “Hello? Hey, Lewis, you there?”
He heard a groan, and then, “Trent? It's, like... 10 past midnight. Why are you calling this late, man?”
“W-well, I kinda need you to come over here, I got a little bit of an... emergency.”
“WHAT!?” Trent heard the phone hit the floor as Lewis got up and started getting dressed. He heard him pick up the phone again and say, “Don't worry, man, I'll be right over!” The phone line went off, and Trent assumed that he was running out to his car and would be there in less than half an hour. He hung up the receiver and walked out to the living room where Vinyl was. He sat down in a nearby easy chair and started to think of how he should reveal Vinyl to Lewis.
Shit... how am I going to show him and make him believe me? There's no way he will... And I don't want him to go crazy with excitement when he sees her... He got up and started to pace.
As he paced, Lewis pulled up into the driveway. He stopped his pacing and stared out the window. Well, this is it... I hope this was really a good idea...
A few seconds later, Lewis opened Trent's front door, running inside and asking, "OK dude, I'm here. Where's the emergency, what's wrong?”
Trent, who was standing with his arms crossed, said, “Just... just go look on the couch.” And motioned his head in that direction.
He ran around to the front of the couch and stopped, looking down at the sleeping filly. He put his hand to his face and asked, “Really, Trent? This was your emergency?”
“Of course this was my emergency, man!” Said Trent, trying to keep his voice low. “It's incredible, isn't it?!”
“I guess, but...” Lewis sat in the easy chair facing the couch. “I don't think that I needed to be woken up in the middle of the night for it. You could have just shown off your plush Vinyl tomorrow.”
Trent realized what was wrong. “Wait, you think this is a toy?”
“Yeah, well, isn't it?”
“Hell no, man!” He came around the couch and stood right in front of Lewis, pointing at Vinyl. “That is a real, honest-to-Celestia, living and breathing filly Vinyl Scratch!”
Lewis rolled his eyes. “Yeah, right, and I'm married to Pinkie Pie.”
“I'm telling the truth! Seriously, go take a closer look at her and tell me that I'm lying!”
Lewis sighed, and got up to go look. He walked over to the couch and knelt down, looking closely at what he thought was a toy. As he stared at her, he noticed that the blanket was rising and falling. “Nice, pal.” He said, turning to Trent. “But just because you have some little mechanism under the blanket her to make it look like she's breathing doesn't mean that you can fool me into believing that she's real.” He then turned back to the couch and grabbed the blanket, pulling it quickly away from Vinyl. He saw there was no little piston or anything like that under the blanket, and saw Vinyl's chest still rose and fell. But he still didn't believe Trent. “Wow! Where did you order this from?! That guy who made it for you must really be talented if he can build you a toy like this!”
“God damn it!” Trent groaned. “I'm trying to tell you, she isn't a toy! She's real! Why can you not comprehend that?!”
As he laughed, Lewis said, “Dude, you will never get me to believe that this is a real pony. There is no way in Hell that a living Vinyl Scratch could possibly exist in our world. This can only be a mechanical toy that you got to trick people. Heck, I bet it's not even that soft to the touch with all of that metal. I mean, how do you even hug something this uncomfortable?” And when he poked Vinyl in the stomach, he realized two things. The first was how soft that she was. The second was the fact that, when he poked her, she giggled and stretched out her legs and neck. She then sat up and yawned, and looked around at her surroundings. This made Lewis shout and fall backwards, which made Vinyl a little scared and she dove back under the blanket.
Trent ran over to the couch and picked Vinyl up, trying to calm the little filly down. Her tiny little heart raced as she buried her face in Trent's chest. “It's okay, Vinyl, it's alright, he's not gonna hurt you...” He said as he petted her head. He then looked at Lewis, who was still sitting on the ground, staring at Vinyl, and said, “I told you she was real.”
Lewis just sat there, shaking and stuttering, “W-wha...h-how...”
Trent assumed that he wanted to know how he got Vinyl. “Well, as I was driving down the road, I saw something move under this little hoodie, so I stopped to see if I could help whatever was under it and that's how I found her. But seriously, I don't know how she showed up in our world.” He saw that Lewis was still speechless, so he reached down to help him up off the ground. “Dude,” he said, “Calm down, start thinking straight, you're scaring Vinyl!”
Lewis grabbed his extended hand, slowly getting to his feet. “D-dude… this is… this is incredible… I-I can’t even…”
Trent just smiled and chuckled, saying, “I know... I never imagined that this could happen...” Just then, they both heard a little rumble, and looked down at the little filly. She looked up at Trent, who said, “Well, it sounds like someone is a little hungry.” He started walking to the kitchen.
Following right behind him, Lewis started going off. “Dude, this is so awesome! I-I mean, finding a real-life Vinyl Scratch is amazing! We've... We've got to tell all our friends! They'll be so jealous, and...”
“No!” Trent shouted as he set Vinyl on the counter.” No one else needs to know about this! You're the only other person, other than me, that can know about her. You're my best pal, Lewis, I trust you with this. I would have never called you if I didn't. Besides...” He sighed and petted Vinyl again. “I realized something while I waited for you to get here. I've never had to take care of any other living thing before, besides my younger siblings. How am I ever going to take care of something like a unicorn pony when I've never done anything like that? That's the other thing I wanted to talk to you about... I'm going to need some help taking care of Vinyl, so... Would you mind moving in with me as my roommate?”
Stunned, Lewis stood there for a minute, then said, “Well... I feel honored that you want me to move in with you to take care of something so important, but... What about my family? What about my parents and brothers that I live with? I mean, I can't bring something this big up so suddenly, my dad will never allow it.”
“Well,” Trent said as he opened the fridge and started to rummage inside for food for Vinyl. “Don't they always treat you like crap anyways? I mean, the only one that really was ever nice to you was your mother, but now, it looks like your dad's personality is rubbing off on her. Really, it seems like it would be a lot better for you to move in here with me and Vinyl.” He pulled an apple out and got a knife out of the dish drainer.
Shaking his head, Lewis said, “My dad will be really pissed if I bring this up, man. He'll think that I'm abandoning the family or something.”
Trent stood next to the counter Vinyl sat on, cutting the apple and saying, “Screw your dad, Lewis. He's an ass anyway. He hates that you've never played a sport, and instead like ponies. And why would he feel like you're abandoning the family when he's the one who's supposed to be supporting them? He has no right to guilt-trip you to make you stay there.” He handed him a slice of apple. “Besides, I need your help with Vinyl, which is really important.”
Lewis looks at the apple slice, and said, “I understand that. But dude, why did you hand me this?” He held up the slice. Trent motioned down to Vinyl and Lewis looked and saw the little unicorn staring at it. He held it out to her, and she took it and ate it, allowing Lewis to pet her. He stood there for a while, then said, “You know what? You're totally right. I can't let my dad control me anymore. And it probably WILL take two people to take care of something like Vinyl.” He turned to Trent, holding his hand out. “I'll go ahead and move in with you. My family may not like it, but they'll have to deal with my decision.”
Trent took his hand, shaking it firmly. “I really appreciate it, man. I bet Vinyl will, too.”
Lewis grinned. “No problem.”
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Loving every second keep going.
Holy wall of text! I love this though ~Vinyl Scratch (Filly)
I tried that once. I ended up a prostitute and addicted to meth. Being 14 is real hard, man.
MOAR MOAR MOAR MOAR
KEEP GOING
AWESOME
how odd. i read the first chapter and there was almost nothing at all about vinyl scratch. instead i got to read about some angsty kid selling MLP crap and whining
edit: it gets better nvm
i upvote
1645350 your JK right lol
Before I read this Fic of yours I was thinking about writing a My Lil Octavia FimFic lol but keep up the good work man
1645812 Life's hard, man.
1645829 Hahaha ya especially since im a closet brony and only a few friends of mine know I am one
1645833 Damn, son.
25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_mde0jg23XQ1rxfgauo1_500.gif
I'm not liking how this gets dislikes for
a) having a generic description
b) being an MLD-type story.
people clearly aren't reading it before disliking, and it pisses me off.
1645891 You know what pisses me off? Few things. I also think your profile pic is pretty cool.
You dare rip-off Dashie? DISLIKE!
Just kidding, *read later*
i shall read this later but i think i will like it. [](/ppcute-in)
make it Octavia and you'll have me
I luv this MLD spin off Fav,like,Follower
you, are an amazing writer. keep doing what youre doing. [](/dj-in)
Let me know when you get an original idea. Then I'll read.
1646388 Or the fact that this is featured?
Trent is REALLY dedicated to those ponies.
After reading chapter one, I got this dialogue stuck in my head, as I can totally see it happening:
"Hey Trent, what are you doing?"
"WHAT'S IT LOOK LIKE I'M DOING, DUMBASS? THINKIN BOUT PONIES, MUTHAFUCKA. GET HYPED."
._.
moreeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee................MOAR!!!!!!
I can't help but wonder how this got onto the featured board...Logic perhaps?
I AM a big Vinyl fan...
I will give it a read later, hopefully I won't be disappointed.
Also, the cover picture is just f*****g adorable, just bringing that to the table.
tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses tenses
THI IS ADORABLE! MOAR
Seriously, this is so cute. Daww moments at every turn. Filly ponies are best ponies. No one can argue that.
Another My Little Dashie thingie?
With Best Pony Vinyl Scratch.
Excuse me while I go die of squees.
media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m05qmdpiQg1r8q1z6.gif
1647486 Oh. Well in that case.
"11/10 BEST STARY EVAR."
"MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRR"
"SO ADORABLE AND NOT A COMPLETE RIP OFF OF MLD IN ANYWAY."
denver.mylittlefacewhen.com/media/f/img/mlfw6238-mlfw2159-cheerilee_burgandy_by_capnpaddy-d4lmh3a.png
Interesting Glitch we've got here.
There's no way in hell this thing should get into the feature box, yet somehow...
Hmm...
dashie.mylittlefacewhen.com/media/f/rsz/mlfw3280_small.jpg
so far, this is really well written. not exactly my cup of tea. a little to positive in my opinion. but i will check back on this nonetheless dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/emoticons/misc_Spitfire_rape.png
Every day, I see so many badfics pass through this site. And every day, I am successfully able to resist acting in a derogatory, insulting, or otherwise dismissive way towards them, because I know that no matter how offensively terrible their stories are, they are still trying, and therefore still deserving of some modicum of sympathy and respect. To date, I have not seen a story so bad, so worthy of mockery and scorn as to make me skip past attempting to focus on the story and directly target the author themselves.
Please keep that in mind as I quote the following line from the Nostalgia Critic:
"You are fired from breathing. Please pack up your desk, and kindly leave life."
1645350
....And that's the third time I've seen you. Wow, you really ARE everywhere!
1645891
I will downvote any fic for any reason at any time. And if it pisses you off, so be it.
dashie.mylittlefacewhen.com/media/f/img/mlfw8346-59809_484266301608219_1896325023_n.jpg
btw, this story isn't that good.
I know that what you are doing is your own personal spin-off, but please don't do what happened in MLD, I wouldn't be able to bear it.
Please don't give me a slap in the feels again.
1647647 Yes yes.
1647695
But the question is, how? Sarah Palin?
I am favoriting this just because of the squee the picture caused me to produce
Also, this story sucks. I hate Trent, and Vinyl Shouldn't ever be allowed near him.
1647707 No, she's simple the creator of all things. Me, however...
1647719
However..........?
1647732 I'm special.
1647738
Special-ED?
JK
1645854
25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_mdi8l4BMVy1qjm9bpo1_500.gif
1647757 It's you and your sexy avatar again. Scootaloo looks violated.
1647744 Who told you?
1647622
Dude, calm yourself. It's just a story. Don't you think you're going a bit too much? There is much worse fics to be raging about, like those cursed trollfics.
1647764
Derpy.static.fimfiction.net/images/story_images/42016.png?1343782510
1646682 That might be the worst part.
Okay, I'm not saying this is terrible, but it definitely wasn't feature-worthy. It's just another story about some angsty kid whose friends (unrealistically) abandoned him for seemingly no reason, who comes in contact with a pony/ponies from the show and has his heart mended. *Cough* "bullshit" *cough*. Not only is it unoriginal, it's an almost exact copy of My Little Dashie, just with more wangsty kids. You even said it was a spin-off in the description. Here's a hint: using a different pony in the same situation does not make it original.
Also, there is a HUGE WALL OF TEXT! In the words of former president Ronald Rainbow "Mr Ponydox, tear down this wall."
~Inspectah Dash. TWE's friendly neighborhood peace maker breaker.
1647779
No, you don't understand. I don't rage. Ever. About anything.
That is the extent to which this story's very existence has offended me to my core.
It's been years since I blasphemed something with such vigor.
This isn't a badly written story, but it's just a bad story as a whole.
1)1647486
files-cdn.formspring.me/photos/20121013/n5079ac81873b4.gif
This is not original. It just isn't. If you think it is, you're just wrong, I'm sorry. Which isn't the same thing as being bad, because every story has its place. I've written cliche stuff just for the purpose of practice and improvement, but when you've read the original, this just doesn't have anything to stand out and make it different. Certainly not at this point, with only 3 chapters done.
2) Your main character makes me want to brain him with a bicycle pump. God damn is he morose and useless, especially in the first chapter. I hated high school. I'd list out the reasons, but now I don't have to, I just have to point at your main character and say "pretty much that." If we could make a combustion engine that ran on teen angst, he could break the oil cartels in a week.
3) You've written three whole chapters, and not a damn thing has happened, plot-wise. By this point, I should have a very clear picture of what the problem is and what steps are going to be coming to try to fix it. All I can guess that the problem might be is that the main character needs to get out more, maybe do some volunteer work or something so he gets some perspective, and I have NO idea how a RL pony is going to make him a better person. Near as I can tell, it's gonna make him even MORE of a reclusive shut-in, which is pretty much the worst possible thing that could happen to this dude.
In a nutshell, while you may be a decent writer (and this story does seem to lend credence to that idea), I just question why this story needs to exist. MLD was already written. It was mediocre and hyped to the rafters, and then it went away. As much as I'd like to say more good things about this fic, there's just nothing to hook me in, the dialogue and characters are forgettable, it's peppered with in-jokes, references, and shout-outs that make little sense narratively, and worst of all, it's a blatant rip-off of MLD that adds little to nothing to the formula and somehow makes the protagonist MORE whiny and unlikable (though, perhaps, easier for most readers to relate to. Make of that what you will...). So, yeah, harsh though it may sound, this really, REALLY doesn't deserve the feature box.
-OtterMatt: TWE's Resident Master of Music
djotter.blossers.net/TWE%20Badge.png