Chapter 1
It was evening time at Twilight's castle, and Spike was in the kitchen making drinks for everypony, as they talked and laughed in the throne room. He couldn't help but listen in on the discussion.
Rainbow laughed her eyes, "Yeah that sounds like Rarity alright. Being a drama queen as always."
Rarity looked away in embarrassment, "Yes well, perhaps I overreacted just a tad but I don't know if 'drama queen' is necessarily accurate..."
"Seriously? You're like the drama emperor!"
"Empress," Twilight corrected.
"Yeah that."
Applejack giggled, "Yeah that sounds about right. You freak out over the tiniest speck of dirt."
Rarity glared slightly, "Well at least I don't roll around in it like you do!"
Applejack opened her mouth to make a comeback, but paused, "Yeah you got me there."
Pinkie stood up in her seat excitedly, "But dirt can be fun! You can dig holes! Or plant stuff! Or roll around in it, like Applejack, or even make dirt castles, which are like sand castles but with dirt! You like sand castles don't you Rarity? I've seen you make one!"
Rarity looked up and thought, "I suppose that's true... Well at least sand has the decency to come off fairly easily. Dirt gets in your fur and everypony can see it, unlike sand."
Fluttershy nodded, "I guess that would be a problem since your fur is so white."
"Precisely!"
Twilight smiled her eyes, "Yes there is that, but you can't stay inside all the time just because you're afraid of getting a little dusty.
How would ponies ever get anything done?"
"Well maybe that's true for non fashion designers, but I simply cannot accept the filth that farmers get involved with! No offense Applejack "
Applejack rolled her eyes, "Speaking of farming, Twilight are you joining in the running of the leaves this year again?"
Twilight nodded, "Oh of course, I join in every year."
"Yeah you got an advantage with your long alicorn legs," Rainbow added.
"I suppose that's true..."
Pinkie jumped up once again, "Oh! Oh! I was thinking about joining in too! It looks like lots of fun!"
Rainbow Dash made a "pfft" noise in response.
Pinkie looked at the pegasus, "What? I could totally do great in that race!"
Rainbow Dash held back a bit of laughter, "Uhh yeah Pinkie, no offense but... Remember how I said Twilight has an advantage? You have the... opposite of that."
"Disadvantage," Twilight added.
"Yeah that."
Pinkie stayed silent for a moment. Disadvantage? What did Rainbow Dash mean? She had said Twilight had an advantage due to having longer legs... and if Pinkie had the opposite of that... That could only mean -
"Are you saying I'm short?!"
"Well, yeah."
"Wha- I am not short!"
Applejack giggled, "Uh Pinkie I hate to tell you this but, Rainbow isn't exactly wrong."
Pinkie looked at Applejack in shock, "What?! That's crazy talk! Fluttershy! Tell them I'm not short!"
"Oh, well, um... I think your your height is... Great." Fluttershy said, smiling at the end.
"See!?" Pinkie yelled.
"Uh, aren't you all the same height?"
Everypony stopped, and looked in the direction of the new voice.
"Spike! How long have you been here?" Twilight asked.
"I just came in but I could hear you from the kitchen, and like I said, apart from Twilight you guys are... the exact same height y'know?"
There was a long pause filled with silence, before a loud "What!?" from everyone but Spike.
Rarity rolled her eyes, "Spikes that is absolutely ridiculous. I'm taller than at least three of the others.
"I'm totally taller than you!" Applejack added.
"Well I'm at least taller than Pinkie!"
"Hey!" Pinkie yelled.
"I'm um, probably not taller than any of you, if that makes anypony feel better..." Fluttershy said, although she didn't really believe it, and to be honest nopony could really hear her over the argument.
Twilight spread out her wings to grab everyone's attention, "Girls, girls, calm down, it doesn't matter who's taller than who."
"Easy for you to say! You're taller than all of us!" Rainbow shouted.
"You get to look down on us all day," Rarity added.
Twilight stepped back, "Hey I do not look down on any pony!"
"I really don't see the difference..." Spike said to himself.
Pinkie went up to Fluttershy, "Flutters am I short? Be honest I can take it!"
Fluttershy stayed silent, and simply placed her wing on Pinkie's head. Pinkie reacted as if she just got news that she had some kind of terminal illness.
Rainbow and Applejack were currently in a shouting match over which of the two of them was taller, and Twilight and Spike just watched the chaos.
"Alright alright enough yelling! I'll settle this," Spike said as he left the room to retrieve something.
The others waited silently, with Applejack and Rainbow glaring at each other, and Pinkie praying that Spike would prove the others wrong.
Spike returned after a few long minutes with... a tape measure, "Alright everypony line up against the wall."
They all obeyed and stood as upright as they could, even Fluttershy, who seemed to care about this a bit more than she let on, and Twilight, who really had nothing to prove in the first place.
Spike began taking measurements, and although it didn't take long at all, it seemed to drag on for the ponies.
"Alright I'm done."
The others leaned in closely, anxious for the results.
"I'll admit, I was wrong. There actually is a difference! I never would have noticed on my own, but I guess I didn't see it since I'm not a pon-"
"Get to the results!" yelled Rainbow.
"Oh right sorry. Well, no surprise, Twilight is the tallest,"
Twilight smiled proudly, and the others rolled their eyes.
"As for shortest... sorry Pinkie."
"NOOOO!" Pinkie sat down sadly, and Fluttershy attempted to comfort her.
"I was actually surprised but, Fluttershy is the second tallest."
"What!?" Applejack and Rainbow exclaimed in unison.
"Oh, wow, really?" Fluttershy looked away a bit, trying to hide a hint of a smile.
"Third tallest goes to Rarity."
"AHA! Oh, I mean... lovely."
Rainbow and Applejack both groaned, and Rainbow yelled, "those three are all taller than us?! Come on!"
"Well, who's taller, me or Dash?" Applejack asked anxiously.
Spike looked at his list of measurements, even though he knew it already, and was only trying to build up suspense, "between you two... the taller one is... Applejack!"
Rainbow flopped on the ground in defeat, while Applejack cheered for herself loudly.
"Seriously?! I'm the second shortest? Frickin...at least I'm still taller that Pinkie I guess."
Pinkie's ears went flat against her head, and Fluttershy swatted Rainbow with her wing for her insensitivity.
Applejack smiled, "but you ain't taller than meeee!"
Rainbow glared, and Rarity added, "you still came in fourth place overall Applejack. Hardly anything to brag about."
Applejack sat next to Rainbow, feeling the wind being ripped directly from her sails, and Twilight stood there, looking down on the others, just as she had been accused of moments earlier.
Spike rolled his eyes, "you know I'm gonna be taller than all of you not too long from now?"
The others fell silent, and watched Spike walk away, having had the last word. He was right after all, the tallest of them is still just a little pony.
The End
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This was a fun short story. I thought Spike seeing them as the same height would be a bigger deal, but I guess that would have made the fic a lot longer that you were willing to write. Pinkie being the shortest is quite the plot-twist
you forget Pinkie was literally faster than you when she was chasing yo ass down?
Did he measure to the top of the head or to the shoulder?
YEEEESSS, BESTO PONY IS TALLUST PONYYYYYYYYYY
11475073
Lol thank you!
11475083
Yeah I thought of adding a line about that, but we can ignore that little plot hole right? 👀
11475087
I think you mean SECOND best pony, is SECOND tallest. Best pony is shortest pony
11475085
Top of the head! Ignoring ears and horns.
That was a very funny and cute story. 😁
11475087
So you're a Pinkie fan? Respectable, however my opinion stands
LOL and best dragon slays them all!
Cute & funny story there, thanks for sharing!
I did notice a couple grammatical errors you might want to keep a closer eye on down the line, but all in all, this was a neat little story with some enjoyable banter. Kudos!
I always thought that the Who is the tallest bit would make a great story. great job!
Of course, what Spike doesn't say is that the differences in their height are all no more than an eighth of an inch or less--small enough that you really would need a tape measure in order to tell the difference.
11475830
I imagine that the ponies themselves can see the very subtle differences, even though other species (including us) can't
Good story! Had me smiling all the way through.
Haha, a good fun story!
Dash always has been imagined as “not small, but aerodynamic”, hasn’t she?
11475876
Funny you should mention that! The "not small, but aerodynamic" thing is actually what inspired this story!
11475886
And around the causality loop we go!
This killed me.
Killed Pinkie too, it looks like.
Hehe. Cute, Fluttershy.
I mean... sure, but you do realize that Twilight is an alicorn, right Spike? She'll become the size of Princess Celestia (no matter how much I think her superior rounded form is cuter
).
Anyway, the point is, It'll be decades before you outgrow her, Spike.
Also, did anyone else think from the description that the story was about Spike somehow thinking everypony was the same height as him, or is that just me?
The story actually being about the ponies' height makes more sense and now I feel kinda dumb for thinking that, lol. But hey, you never know with fiction, and I think it would make a good crackfic.
Accept. And Spike's definition of not too long depends on how you measure it since it might not be long for dragons but for ponies that might be different.
11475876
The same image had Fluttershy say that she was built "like" a supermodel, even though she literally was one for most of a Season 1 episode.
11475902
Naw, it won't take Spike decades, more like a few more years. Remember how tall he got at the end of season 9? Sure, he seemed slightly shorter than Twilight, but did we forget his Greed Growth sprout?
Point is: it's never absolute with dragons. They seem to change size on a dime provided the right conditions are met.
Edit: scratch that, Spike IS taller than full-grown alicorn Twily, but her horn barely goes over his head. So yes, he will indeed tower over all of them.
11476644
To be fair, that's mostly being a biped. Put him on all fours and she's on top again.
11476775
Fair. But that is until he gets a growth spurt.
Dragons are very peculiar. Twilight, even as an alicorn, has a set height limit. But Spike? He can grow to the size of a mountain just based on his feelings alone.
Again, I direct you to "Greedy Spike."
That was a good story.
The ponies are secretly Irkens. < <
Wonder if the Unicorn horn counts, or if its just discounted like hair.
You did a great job! Very funny! I loved how spike got the last laugh and ironically Twilight was oblivious to the obvious.
11476855
Well, they are all generally ruled by the ponies who are the tallest among them...
11476644
Have you looked at the show finale?
Rarity has gray hairs, Pinkie Pie has a foal around the age the CMC were (who are now teaching at the School of Friendship), and all of the Mane 6 other than Twilight have wrinkles under their eyes.
So no, that does not happen in a few years. I'll stick with a few decades.
Also, you may want to look closely between the two again. Spike isn't taller than Twilight even at the end of the show in the first place. Twilight is still should taller than Spike, and no, that's not including the horn.
Someone posted thier art depicting the Main 6 at noticeably diffrent heights. They placed Rainbow as the shortest, then Pinkie, Unicorn Twilight, Rarity, Applejack, Fluttershy, and Alicorn Twilight.
11476895
It's not Just ponies. The Leader of the Kirin, Rainshine the tallest. Cadance is the tallest in the Crystal Empire. Chrysalis was the Tallest changeling and Thorax became tallest when he took over. The diamond dog royals are all tall as well. Dragon Lord Torch dwarfed the outer Dragons. Even the Buffalo and Yaks are rule by the Largest of them. A really big Griffon could likely just take over Griffonstone by virtue of size! Almost every powerful being in the show is tall and/or large. Grogar is huge compaired to normal goats. Discord is extremely tall/long. The Storm King was taller than the Yetis. Tempest is physically powerful and above average hight for a Unicorn. StarSwirl is taller than average. Rockhoof is tall. The Pony of Shadows was huge. This makes some degree of sense with physcial strenght but is even ture of magical power. Flurry Heart is powerful and her wings and horn are oversized, implying yes she will get large as she "grows into" them.
Don't you mean dragon?
11475093
11477530
I'll make a note of that. I know how they're measured, but I disregarded that since MLP characters have far different anatomy compared to actual horses
Fun story, but too many jarring spelling mistakes that I could really enjoy it.
11477573
Quadrupeds are generally measured at the shoulders/withers because their heads and necks move up and down a lot more than bipeds. (Also, that height is a good indicator of how tall a fence needs to be to keep them from easily hopping over it.) Horses and the like are specifically measured in 'hands', which are 4 inches (10.16 cm.)
Yes I know how they're measured, but these are MLP horses not actually horses, so I disregarded that.
Of course it came down to a competition -- sorta -- between Applejack and Rainbow!
But it was cute how Fluttershy seemed to be a little proud of her height but tried to hide it
11477682
I remember reading a little about that, although I do think it's doubtful for an Equestrian pony to use that same measurement method on themselves, since our reasons for doing it on real ponies (for helping to determine high their fences should be) don't apply to Equestrian ponies. It would be like if Equestrian ponies kept non-sapient humans for pets, held them in fences, and measured these humans up to their shoulders instead of to the top of their heads, or used some other system that suited them to determine how "tall" humans are. Then those ponies somehow come to our world and assume that we measured ourselves the same way they measured their humans, and assumed it for no other reason than it's how they did it in Equestria.
Although I can see them using their own different height-determining system that's different from anything we use for ourselves and horses. Or even have 2 different heights; one for how tall they are when standing normally and one when they were standing on their hooves.
11477822
The main reason for measuring to the withers still applies to Equestrian ponies: The head is not a naturally stable point in feral bodyforms they way it is in most humanoid and centauroid ones. Even doing a "stand up straight and look directly forward," pose results in a variable head height when that head is attached to the front of a horizontal torso.
A fun little fic. I could see this being an actual conversation they had.
Although, unfortunately, I have to put on my proofreader cap here. There were a fair few mistakes that could take someone out of the story easily, so I've compiled all the ones I saw here for you.
Hard to tell, but I put an apostrophe in "everyones" ^
Those were all the basic errors I noticed. All in all, I'd say you did a pretty good job. Keep up the good work
11497369
Thank you! And thanks for the advice!
Dude! This is a cute little fic! Especially like the sas delivery from Spike!
11477297
No that line was excluding Spike. It was meant as a joke about how ponies are relatively small creatures, and even the tallest pony is easily beaten in height but other creatures