• Member Since 18th Feb, 2013
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Attention Horse


This story is a sequel to Wondercolt Weekends

A sunny day, calm waters, and warm sands: it’s a perfect date at the beach for Fluttershy and Rainbow Dash. Until they encounter a bad breeze…

A Flutterdash fic written for Pride Month 2022.

Edited by:

Cover Art by:

Chapters (1)
Comments ( 10 )

It's not bad, per se, but I feel like there are little bits about the characterization that don't quite line up. Things like Fluttershy calling Rainbow Dash "dear", or Rainbow Dash carrying a purse.

“And it’s so close to my skin, sometimes it feels like I’m wearing nothing at all.”

“Not on your life, Señor!” Daring Do grimaced. “It’s almost like I’m wearing nothing at all. ”

Fluttershy’s words once more echoed in her head: “ It’s like I’m not wearing anything at all!”

Dash bit her lip, and squeezed a handful of her towel. She could feel her face turning red. Ack! Too much! Stupid Sexy ‘Shy!”

I’m really loving that reference 😭💀💀

That was a neat FlutterDash story, I gotta give you that. Also, I'm a big fan of FlutterDash in EG, so it makes it even better. And, I love the part where Flutty showed her brother The Stare. Like, did she learn it from her pony counterpart by any chance? :pinkiehappy:

Good work, mate. Definetly deserves a fave.


Also buck you zephyr from both universes f**k you both

Sometimes fanfiction as a genre is about giving characters room to breathe beyond the familiar, and to explore who they might be, if given room in a story format that allow for all around more.

Admittedly, not everyone will agree with such "what if" explorations, which help play with notions of who or what a character really is.

"the engine nose rising noticeably"
"the engine noise rising noticeably"?

"Ugh, why’d they have put the shore so far"
"Ugh, why’d they have to put the shore so far"?

"and planted a parasol into the between them"
"and planted a parasol into the sand between them"?

"Caballeron, “We both know"
"Caballeron replied, “We both know"?

I'm pretty tired at the moment, but that was nice. :)
Thank you for writing!
(Though I'm wondering: Am I forgetting or missing something that happened with Zephyr in another story, or is the estrangement to this degree not something that's been shown?)


Ah good catches, Reese.

The estrangement between 'Shy & Zephyr, or more accurately 'Shy's family and Zephyr is something that is meant to be relatively recent as of this story's timeline, and I might address it obliquely in a future edit that will add some foreshadowing to his appearance later in the story earlier on.

I intended his estrangement to be a consequence of the Flutterdash relationship which began in my last outing with the characters: I don't think Zephyr is the sort who understands "No means No", and I think he'd probably not take "My sister is dating my crush" very gracefully. The likely result of that would be a EQG equivalent of Fludderbruder, only Zephyr would be out of the house for good.

All of this started as two ideas: firstly "Fluttershy looks hot in that wet suit, I should make a Simpsons joke about it" and "Fluttershy is a badass, and she would totally own a dive knife and defend her gf"... I think in retrospect they could have been united a little bit more smoothly.

This is what I get for trying to have something out on time for once!

Thanks. :)

re the estrangement:
Ah, thanks; some of that information I picked up from the blog post, but not all of it, IIRC.

"I don't think Zephyr is the sort who understands "No means No", and I think he'd probably not take "My sister is dating my crush" very gracefully."
I think it'd depend on how the character's interpreted, but, yeah, not hard to see that interpretation.

"only Zephyr would be out of the house for good"
Well, maybe not for good if he genuinely turned things around, offered a sincere apology, etc.
Buuut I'm guessing that this version of him is not likely to do that, and, like I said, that interpretation of him strains my suspension of disbelief not a bit.

"This is what I get for trying to have something out on time for once!"
Eh, maybe it could have been better, but I think it's already pretty good. :)
(I mean, I completely missed the Simpsons reference until, IIRC, you explicitly pointed it out in the blog post, because pop culture and I have sometimes not great contact, but I think it works as least as well and possibly better, or did for me, at least, taken as it is in the story.)

"the gaps in the forrest."
"the gaps in the forest."?



Were those extra line breaks deliberate?

And I think the new scene, assuming I did indeed correctly identify it, was fine, and does indeed add some useful information. :)

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