• Published 12th Feb 2020
  • 2,049 Views, 61 Comments

I Love You. I Hate You. I Want To Be You. - CheerDaLee

Chrysalis looks at her phone and feels something.

  • ...

I Hated You. I Pity You. I Want To Understand You.

Cadence looked through the two way mirror at the mare who'd pretended to be her. Now that the haze of anger was gone, she didn't see an monster, an evil changeling or an impersonator. She instead saw a sad, downright pathetic mare. She wasn't fidgeting or worrying. She simply sat there, staring at the mirror side of the glass.

Even as she remembered all that happened. The false text, the cut gas line, the ride she needed to get back to her own wedding the part that stood out to her was when she called her out. Not for the reasons most expected. But because of how she reacted. The smile she wore was... strange. Like it wasn't natural on her face. Uneven and gone instantly when she realized it was over. Her disguise flickered as she stammered an excuse. But once Shining shouted at her she just... shut down. Those words "Who could love an impostor like you?!" seemed like they were a slap in the face. Her previously flickering disguise completely dropping.

After she'd been arrested the wedding itself went off without a hitch. There were a few more complaints about changelings than there would have been but everyone had a great time. She herself had been admittedly a part of the group complaining. Not about Changelings as a whole but the whole ordeal was stressful. Her expression stood out so clearly in her mind. At the time she was angry. Even taken some joy in the fact she knew her little... whatever it was had failed. But things had changed since then. They'd told her what little they could find out about her. She lived alone, worked alone and didn't have much to her name. The apartment itself had been ransacked, anything of value stolen.

There were so many around Cadence telling her what to do, what to think. As it stood it was up to her if she wanted to press charges. It seemed like it was what everyone expected her to do but... She couldn't bring herself to. Not after getting a good look at her.

She'd heard about changelings of course. How they are treated, thought of and stereotyped. How they had to wear a ring to bind their abilities. She hadn't gotten many chances herself to find out how true any of it was since they all kept to themselves so much.

She glanced down at the ma- No, Chrysalis' wrists. On both of them was an obvious band, locked. They were a semi-public punishment. Proof that she'd broken the rules. That she was troublesome. Honestly she felt it was a bit cruel. Yes she'd broke the rules but even criminals wore an ankle monitor that was usually hidden under pants.

She sighed and rubbed her temples softly. All the different voices going through her head. Shining shouting how she should be basically raked over the coals for what she'd done. Taken to court and the whole nine yards. Twilight trying to understand what the changeling's plan was. Aunt Celestia with her cold anger. But honestly? From the look on her face it wouldn't do anything more to her. Cadence of course couldn't be completely sure of it but she looked hopeless and it scared her. Not for herself but for Chrysalis. For what she might do.

She took another breath. She knew she didn't have to do this. Everyone would understand if she did nothing but ignore the mare. If she even outright hated her. But she didn't. She couldn't bring herself to. She'd been taught many things through her education. But perhaps the most important right now was that everyone should be given a chance. Chrysalis may have done things wrong but Cadence wanted to be the the one to give it to her. She wasn't blindly optimistic. She didn't expect to change the mare or desire to "Fix" her. She just wanted to give her a chance. Someone to care.

Author's Note:

So. Yeah. I wasn't sure if I wanted to actually do this but I did. Ideally, she doesn't have any helpers and being away from people so much she's got very little power. It was a desperate attempt that didn't last long. She got a taste of someone else's joy and then it was torn away.

I doubt I'll write anything extra to go along with this but this is the end of this short tale. Chryssi failed quickly. Cady had her happy wedding and Chryssi is just waiting for it all to end. Too bad Cady isn't going to leave her alone.

I wanted a somewhat optimistic feeling without being overly sappy. There's a chance something good will come from this all. But also equally possible she just jumps in front of a car as soon as she gets out. She's not in a good place. Good thing she has someone like Cady to help her.

Idk. I'm just rambling now.

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Comments ( 23 )

Short but sweet. I do hope that someday you add to this. Nothing too extravagant, but just to show that maybe this Chrysalis was able to find some happiness of her own.

If I do it'll be a thing of it's own. This little thing here is done. Thanks for the kind words though ^~^

Cadence, you are a saint.

You dont have to do something if you don't want to.

It's chill. It's something that pops up in my head too. So they're not the only ones. It's mostly a matter of motivation.

Desire. Obsession. False Hope. Nothing left. Giving Up.
Trying Anyway. Get So Far.
Failed. Punished.
Reminded you are nothing, will always be nothing.
You don't deserve to be her. Why would you? You're no one but who you try to be. But you can't be them. Ever. You're not them. Why try? You're not you. You are no one.
Why do you even exist?

Because you are someone. Even if you never got the chance to be that someone. I'm sorry you tried to be me. Sorry that I was the only thing you could think to be. But I can't be what you are. You have to be you.

I'm nothing. I can't be anything. I can't be you. I can't be me. I'm nothing.

No, you're not. You're you. You just need to find yourself.

... how?

I don't know... but... maybe I can help?


Because you deserve to live. You deserve to be someone. To be yourself.

... okay.

Pretty fucking good.

Eeey. Thank ya, thank ya.

Hmm. Not too bad. It's not too far off from how they'd act. Though I don't see my Chryssi being so easy to get to agree. At least not so quickly.

Still. Not bad at all! ^~^

Just let a moment of inspiration carry me. Which I'm sure is what made you want to write this in the first place. Yay for chaining inspirations. :twilightsmile:

Make more shit like this.

Nice and blunt. I like that.

YAY! You added another chapter!

This was nice! It compliments the quality of Dotoriii and adds to the story from the art.

Thank ya thank ya. I knew I wanted to do SOMETHING afterwards. Showing the reality of that this world. As depressing for buggo as it may be.

Loved it! Thoughts on someone writing a spin-off from the first chapter? Cause honestly this gives me plenty of ideas.

Outside of my second chapter, not really. But I'm super curious about your ideas

Was thinking of having Chryssi stalk Cadance and Shining for a while, the chapters going from her first sighting of the mare, to seeing her talk with all her friends. And then we would see more into how Chryssi thinks and feels, about how Changelings are treated in society and how her family and species dynamic works.

Ah. That'd be neat. But my main idea with chryssi was that she didn't really know Cady. She didn't know how she acted, know who she really was. She only knew her from afar. She was so focused on being someone else she didn't take time to learn who they were. She was desperate. idk how to word it. But her actually doing research would hurt it a little on my end. BUT seeing more about how changelings were treated and their side of society would have been a good idea on my end.

Oh totally, I'm not saying how you ended it was bad. Far from it. The fact she was so rash, so desperate to feel even a lick of joy, of a happy life, that she would not even think to look into Cadance's mannerisms and such was a great idea. Plus, you made it seem like she was just another run of the mill Changeling, not a Queen, so she would have no idea how to copy someone's personality perfectly as an experienced Changeling would.

Yeee. The idea of Queens has been supressed. Even if she was physically a queen she would have been told from birth there was no such thing. That it was only an old tale. That they had died out. She would be told a number of conflicting stories but they all lent to the same thought. Don't talk about Queens.

Changelings are told to just live like ponies. Well, as best they can. To just lay down and take how they're treated by society and to just try to ignore how other races treat them.

There's no mortal ponies left who were alive when changelings were a risk but even now they are treated as if it was merely a decade ago.

It's a whole thing.

That was pretty good. I really hope you expand on this sometime 👍

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