Of all the features of her town, its parks and trails are one of Mayor Alice Harper's favorites. But not everyone, or rather everypony, appreciates it.
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- Member Since 8th Mar, 2012
- offline last seen 52 minutes ago
Alaborn
Somewhere in the USA. Probably older than you. And something about MLP:FIM makes me want to write stories. Unfortunately, being gainfully employed cuts into my writing time.
Alaborn
Joined 8th Mar, 2012 ·
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Ha!
Careful. You know what they say; if you pay the manegeld, you'll never be rid of the mane.
Crooked, I meant that as a pun. If you want to sue along those lines, you have plenty of bigger targets back home.
You spoiled the punchline, but this was still a delightful twist on the Biscuit formula (recipe?) Thank you for it.
FYI for those of you who do not recognize this particular species of pest among the legal world, this is a serial or vexatious litigant, what business owners call a PITAttorney. We had one in a wheelchair who worked his way down main street in Topeka once, measuring every doorway and step so he could file a stack of suits at once under ADA, and leave dozens of business owners trying to hire contractors to lower that 3" step out by their wheelchair ramp to 2" within 30 days, while still having to shut the whole business down to show up in court and hire their own lawyers. (This is also known as 'fishing for a bribe' where a $2,000 check written to the individual will magically make the case go away cheaper than dealing with all the legal crap.) Since the litigant is a lawyer and can operate pro se, they effectively have no cost to their actions, and can make a living out of this.
Now, most government organizations will cave to this kind of extortion... I mean helpful advice. After all, it's cheaper than hiring a lawyer, going to court, etc... The problem (as stated above) is exemplified in the eternal quote by Kipling: "Once you have paid him the Danegeld/ You never get rid of the Dane." or in simpler terms, here comes another lawyer, and another, and another....
The best approach the city can do in this case is to *immediately* go to the signs department and have them print a replacement sign for every one of the 'offensive' ones, then the moment the paint is dry, get them out and the old ones removed. (fyi: they paint over old signs in good condition to use them for other purposes. It's cheaper.) That lets the city send a regular letter signed by the mayor to the address specified saying "Thank you for your visit yesterday, Mister Scales. It's always nice to have a concerned citizen inform us of potential issues in our fair city. Be assured, the signs in question have been replaced, and there should be no issue regarding this in the future. Thank you so much for your concern."
There should *not* be a check in the envelope. Mr. Scales' legal services were *not* requested, they were pressed upon the city without the promise of recompense, and no court will force the city to cough up cash for unrequested services. There may be an exchange of correspondence in the mayor's future, but each letter should end with something to that regard. "...so with that in mind, the city bears no legal liability to pay you for your services. Thank you very much for your concern."
9897047
Georg knows my inspiration for the story, even citing the particular form of vexatious litigant I was thinking about.
His advice is good, but remember: do you really want to go to trial against an adorable pony?
If the mayor had any smarts she'd be looking at an Equestrian law firm to make sure what Crooked Scales is doing isn't against Equestrian Law or in violation of the treaties signed by Equestria and the United States.
9897151
I'm guessing she wants to get in touch with the illustrious Dewey, Cheatham and Howe.
9897010
I foresee myself stealing Manegeld at some point.
...Well I feel silly. I didn't even remember equestrian also meant horseback riding until the mayor said so. Had me wondering why a city wouldn't want ponies on their trails, then all the more so when they had never had any pony tourists before. Figured it was going to be some xenophobic individual doing such things on his own.
9897449
You'll notice when using a program like Word to write. It will flag Equestria as a misspelling, but not Equestrian.
It also doesn't like pegasi.
Jeeze, I’m half expecting him to be secretly working with Flim and Flam.
9898128
Crooked Scales got his law degree from Flim and Flam's Friendship University. I could see that.
It's good to know that even as perfect as we think Equestria may be, it is still a bit like our world, too. Even in Eden, there were snakes.
Great story! You really picked a good tale to tell.
9897613
That is because “Pegasus” was the name of Bellerophon’s flying horse. As a unique individual, spell check thinks that it should be capitalized.
In & of itself, this isn’t a problem. However, for consistency,
you need to either capitalize “Earth Pony” & “Unicorn” or make “pegasus” small lettered
Spell check hates “pegasi” & “pegasuses” equally. “Brony” is Right Out
For similar reasons, you’ll have the same problem with “Minotaur” although that doesn’t come up as much
Just glad that the game "Pin the tail on the donkey" has fallen out of favour.
9898661
Except at Pinkie parties!
9899002
No sane human or equestrian will ever try and sue Pinkie for anything, ever.
9897102 Yep, I'm a follower of Overlawyered.com and the absolute weird stuff they get there, like the guy who sued to stop a service that lists frequent litigants who sue phone soliciters so said soliciters can be sure not to call them. Yeah, think about that for a minute.
What the mayor should do is write a letter to twilight sparkle. She would not be amused and would reply rapidly.
9899356
Nah. Get the Cutie Mark Crusaders to help Crooked Scales find new meaning from his cutie mark.
No horseplay
No grazing
Old country signs are old.
There's a suburb near me called Spring Hill. Maybe I should keep my eye out for a very litigious pony....
I was expecting somepony complaining about how the trails aren't pony-friendly, or that the parks are massively inferior to what they have back in Equestria, or just harassing people on the trails and/or in the parks because they're not using them correctly.
Crooked Scales was an unexpected surprise.
Not what I expected, and I love the way his name's meaning changes in context
Crooked Scales. At first, it aligns with him being a lawyer suing against discrimnation, "crooked scales" of unfair treatment.
Then it's meant as a metaphor of corruption, since he came to ask for bribes
9900579
I'd like to think, with the right CMC intervention, he'd start acting in the former case rather than the latter.
9897241
Or Shyster, Flywheel, & Shyster.
9898432
Technically, "Minotaur" was a title, literally "bull of Minos", and he arguably had a name but it was rescinded when he was born and turned out to take after his father (a bull that was ensorcelled into raping some queen or other because the Olympians were assholes; there's a reason Hades didn't argue with a position that put him as far away from them as cosmologically possible).
9897151
Ain't worth what it would cost to litigate. Just research