• Member Since 8th Mar, 2012
  • offline last seen 11 hours ago

Alaborn


Somewhere in the USA. Probably older than you. And something about MLP:FIM makes me want to write stories. Unfortunately, being gainfully employed cuts into my writing time.


E

I woke up in the hospital. I don’t recall how I got here. I don’t recognize the mare who says she’s family. I don’t even remember my own name.

So what kind of pony will I become?

Chapters (24)
Comments ( 438 )

Well, this should be interesting.

More will be revealed later, of course.

Wait, WHAT?

HOLY...

WAT A :twistnerd:!

I really like amnesia stories. My OC has a case of it. It lets me have more time to come up with a story for him. Besides, I want to see how this plays out.

What how is AJ and Diamond Tiara related and when AJ says their family I thought it was AB

1824558 1824953 More will be revealed next chapter!

That was interesting.

Waaiiiiit a second... This seems awfully similar to a movie I saw once. About a rich bitch who comes down with a case of amnesia and gets taken in by her redneck "family." There was a minor shitstorm when she got her memory back if I remember correctly.

1826161 Closest one that comes to my mind is Overboard, starring Goldie Hawn and Kurt Russell. If I ever did watch it all the way through, I don't remember.

1826192 Well, I added the story to my read later list. I'll get to it eventually.

this looks intriguing good sir, I shall read later, but for now shall 'Favourite', in order to retain on some kind of list. good day *tips hat, then walks out*

Ooooh, exciting. I have an idea of what might be going on, but I'm gonna wait for next chapter!

Ooooh, you dirty rascal, tagging Applebloom separate from the crusaders, making us all think it was her.

1827688 Apple Bloom was tagged separately because she'll play a bigger role in the story. The only trickery was choosing not to write the accents, otherwise it would be apparent that the narrator wasn't Apple Bloom.

1827922
I always hate it when people write the accents anyway. You never see someone writing in Rarity's, do you?
But intentional or not, you totally succeeded with the :applecry: misdirection.

1827982 :raritydespair: I do NOT have an accent. I speak proper Equestrian, and will not compromise my speech with colloquialisms!

1828071
Your accent is a well-feigned mid-atlantic upper-class, but you occasionally slip, madamoiselle.
That's ok, though. I won't tell if you don't ;-)

24 up zero down?
25 up, zero down.
Beautiful misdirection, and I enjoy the writing style. I have no idea where this is going, but I can tell I'm going to enjoy it.

The story here is straightforward. While there are more outlandish ways to go from that first chapter, they wouldn't fit in a story involving Applejack.

This is going to be really interesting once Diamond Tiara encounters the CMC and even Silver Spoon, DT's BFF.

Glad I favorited this story.

Still loving it! But... going home.... that should be coming. going means to a place that is not theirs. coming means going with them to their home, to follow. The doctor would have said going, while AJ says coming home. Sorry, this is a tired comment

1859702 Come is used to show movement toward or in the direction of the speaker or the person being spoken to. Go is used to show movement away from the speaker or the person being spoken to. In this case, both ponies are going away from the hospital to their home. The previous night, at home, Applejack would have told her family that Diamond Tiara was coming home tomorrow.

Really looking forward to more of this, it's a sad and intriguing take on DT. Great work.

One of the few stories that make me feel a little sympathy for Diamond Tiara. Good story.

That was pretty amazing. Poor fillies... What will happen at school? :trixieshiftright:

1878376 We'll be seeing the Cutie Mark Crusaders before the rest of the class. :unsuresweetie:

Wow, I thought Apple Bloom would take it better than this. Shame on you, AB!

1880464 Now that she's got that off her chest, she'll hopefully be able to judge the new Diamond Tiara fairly. If not, then perhaps a whuppin' from Applejack would make her change her mind.

Ironically, I was listening to the song "welcome home" just before reading this.

Daaawwww...that was sweeter than sugar!

Darnit. This fic makes me like Diamond Tiara... I don't really like her for being not very nice. But THIS, ugh... makes me to like her... But liking her and reading this fic....cdn.uproxx.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/04/regret-nothing-dalek-doctorwho3.gif

Anyway on another note;i0.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/000/169/432/nic_cage_moar.gif

Always nice to see an author who does an appropriate amount of research for their work. Good job on that horse anatomy!

1925959 I'll thank FanOfMostEverything, who put a link to the Wikipedia page with equine anatomy terms on his page.

Not that ponies move anything like horses, and of course there's that disturbing image from the end of The Super Speedy Cider Squeezy 6000 where they're all holding up mugs, and appear to have thumbs on their legs.

Just want to say 'thank you!' for amazing story you are writing :)

This is superb, and I'm really looking forward to the next one. :)

*FINALLY ONE OF MY FAVORITES UPDATES*
I was in the mood for some good reading. I was satisfied.
I want to see how Silver Spoon is now.... when will she be coming in?
I'm excited to see the CMC next chapter :pinkiehappy:

1928886 I expect Chapter 6 to cover her return to school. So that means you'll see Silver Spoon then? :trollestia:

This is getting better!

I know this is supposed to be heartwarming and all, but the idea of building an effigy of yourself for your supposed new friends to throw stuff at.. just strikes me as messed up and depressing.

Hey can you give Diamond taira a pink and white cloth to tie around her neck? I just think it would look good on her.

1968603 She woke up and found that, apparently, she was Ponyville's greatest monster. And she has no idea why she acted the way she did. That's a situation that would mess up anypony.

But at the end of the day, they all ended up dirty and happy. Just like any successful crusade.

Wonderful chapter. I'm really enjoying this story. I thought the effigy of Diamond was an great piece of symbolism on several levels; a gesture of goodwill to the Crusaders, a symbol that Diamond is ready to renew herself, and from a literary point of view, a clear indication to the reader that this new, humble Diamond is not the one we knew. The CMC had better give her some respect now!

I am wondering what's happened to Silver Spoon, however. The CMC know that she's Diamond's best friend, so surely that's got to come up at some point :)

Voicing my opinions at this juncture would be a mistake. I'll need to wait for the overall themes of this story to be fleshed out to their fullest.

1973808 :pinkiegasp: My good sir. This is the Internet. Such restraint will not be tolerated! :pinkiecrazy:

In all seriousness, please feel free to comment, speculate, and voice opinions. I'd be happy to answer any questions about the direction of the story.

1977835
Well, to put it simply, this story is bringing me flashbacks of reading another fic on this site known as Breaking Out by BlackM. It was a harmless one-shot about Diamond realizing the error of her ways after the Family Appreciation Day incident. It wasn't a bad story. It was well-written and the use of adjectives was fantastic. It just went in a direction that struck a chord with me in the wrong places. The biggest problem I had with it was its black-and-white approach to morality. Everything Diamond did was wrong, and she agreed she was wrong every time someone told her in every way without hesitation. Interesting idea, but my disbelief can break through it like a plastic spoon.

The addition of amnesia makes your story a bit different on that front. It's not about Diamond scribbling out her life and rewriting a new one in its place; it's about a tidal wave washing the whole page away and making her start writing all over again on a new one. The problem that I'm left to contemplate is that the only color on that first page appears to be black. All of it seems to indicate that past Diamond = bad; new Diamond = good. While the approach of using the boldly contrasting colors of black and white can certainly make a stronger statement, I personally feel that some realism is forfeited as a result. The only reason I would say that's a bad thing here is because of the genre of the subject matter. I hesitate to make this claim because the story is still unfinished, so the two pages haven't been revealed to the reader yet. All I can do for now is assume from what's been shown so far, and that's where my second event marker is set.

Basically, it seems to me that with the way the CMC responded to Diamond's return, their relationship had to have taken a turn for the worse before the time in which the story takes place. You see, as far as the CMC's characterization goes, there's one key factor that I feel has been neglected: naivety. Given how cynical the CMC have been towards everything concerning Diamond, all I can do is assume that something very wrong happened before the incident. The final product is still a mystery, so speculation is my only tool right now. If the story makes dramatic changes in future chapters, all this ranting is meaningless. I hope you understand where I'm coming from, though.

Seems I've neglected to put it simply. :twilightsheepish: Have I mentioned I like this story? I just need to figure out what it tastes like.

1978419 I wouldn't say old Diamond = bad, but what old Diamond did = bad. And the fact that new Diamond sees that what old Diamond did is bad shows that's she's good.

For the purpose of this story, I have an idea of why Diamond acted the way she did, but just how much of that she or somepony else will figure out remains to be seen.

As for the CMC, I'm afraid their reactions have been colored by how every interaction they had with Diamond Tiara in the past was negative. Whether something else happened off camera is undecided.

Diamond tiara is related to applejack?! How?!!! :rainbowhuh:

First off, well done! :pinkiehappy: Secondly, Diamond Tiara is way better now than before. I don't actually feel like enjoying watching HER in cupcakes! Finally, Good idea to wait on the school!

Login or register to comment