Applejack is Upside Down (Amongst Other Things)

by TheAncientPolitzanian

Strange Magic

As the alarm clock continued to loudly ring, Applejack couldn't shake the feeling that something was off. She couldn't put on her hoof on it, though; it was just a gut feeling, and little more than that. Still, it was there, and more often than not, Applejack's gut tended to have a point. But at the same time, considering the fact that she had awoken less than a minute ago, there was also a good chance that it was just typical waking-up grogginess.

Deciding to ignore the gut feeling for the time being, Applejack yawned once more, slammed her hoof on top of the alarm clock to turn it off, and began to push her blanket off of her body.

It was then that she finally noticed her forelegs were gray.

"W-What the‽" Applejack gasped, even the slightest traces of her prior tiredness finding themselves obliterated in but a single, solitary instant.

Much to Applejack's disappointment and terror, a second glance confirmed that this was not just a trick her mind had cold-heartedly chosen to play on her. Sure enough, instead of the light-orange blanket of short hair that had covered her body for all of her life (and likely even after that—dying your coat was highly impractical), the limbs before her were a pale-ish gray.

Actually, it wasn't too far off from the local mailmare's coloration. But that was besides the point.

Fearing the worst, Applejack practically threw the blanket off of herself and looked down. Those fears were instantly confirmed; her entire body had changed to that strange light gray coloration.

To make matters even worse, however, her body wasn't the only thing that had changed color. Applejack noticed that her tail, previously hidden beneath the blanket, was now a deep black instead of its usual blonde hue. Even the hair tie near its end hadn't been spared of this strange change; the formerly apple-red band had turned a dark blue. A quick glance over her shoulder confirmed that her mane and its own tie had undergone a similar treatment.

Wait, Applejack thought to herself, if even my hair ties got changed, then what about my... my...

Fearfully, she looked to her left. She saw exactly what she was hoping she wouldn't see. Her prized Stetson, currently hanging off one of the bed posts, had turned blue.

"...Horseapples," she cussed in frustration.

Her hat couldn't be blue! That was like... like Celestia being pink! Like Pinkie being a pegasus! Like ponies having cutie marks on only one of their flanks! Like Applejack being gray!

And yet, that last thing was exactly what had happened.

How had it even happened? How had her entire appearance changed literally overnight?

Was this one of Rainbow Dash and Pinkie Pie's pranks? No, it couldn't be. Even if they had somehow found a way to change the colors of Applejack's coat, hair, and accessories, there was no way in Tartarus they'd have laid a hoof on her hat. They both knew the significance it held to Applejack; it was very similar to the hat her late father had always worn before his passing. It was her little way of honoring him, and for that very reason, not even Rainbow would be willing to stoop as low as to tamper with it.

And yet, as of right now, it was the only explanation that seemed to make sense.

But still...

"Well, one thing's for certain," Applejack said to herself, "By the end of today, somepony's goin' to get a piece of my mind."

She just didn't know who. Or exactly how mad she'd be at them.

With that declaration, the orange gray earth pony grabbed her light brown dark blue hat, placed it on her head, and jumped out of bed.

Or rather, she fell out of bed.

Literally fell.

As in, her head somehow slammed against the air. From what the ensuing pain told her, she might as well have jumped head-first into the wooden floor beneath her.

"Ack! What the hay‽" she whinnied through the pain.

Overcoming her injury and her dizziness, Applejack managed to stand back up again. She promptly shook her head back and forth, her vision beginning to stabilize.

It was then that she noticed that everything appeared to be upside down. As if completely changing colors wasn't confusion-inducing enough.

Letting out yet another grunt of frustration, Applejack looked down/up at her hooves. They were floating in midair, as if they were standing on some sort of invisible floor. Confused, she lifted a hoof up, then lowered it back down to the "floor"; it made a sound not unlike that of wooden floor being softly tapped against. This, Applejack deduced, meant that for all intents and purposes, she had simply had her exterior appearance flipped over; her interactions with her surroundings hadn't been altered.

Amongst other things, it also threw out the possibility that her predicament was Pinkie and Rainbow's faults. Unless, of course, they'd gotten Twilight or maybe Rarity in on the trick, too. But neither of those two unicorns had been particularly privy to pranks, especially in recent memory. Though, of course, there was the one time they'd all gotten together to get back at Rainbow for her excessive pranking. Had Applejack unknowingly done something to get on somepony else's nerves? Was this some weird revenge plot by Starlight and Rarity for that thing she'd apparently done during Twilight's Friendship Retreat, but didn't actually do? Were there spells that could pull this sort of thing off?

Continuing the line of thought that appeared to be the longest, Applejack decided to look back on the events of that particularly disastrous day-and-a-half. If there was an explanation for her current plight, more likely than not it could be found somewhere in that time period.

Two days ago, after the mess that was the Friendship Retreat had started to simmer down, she and her friends had sleptin until almost noon (thank Celestia that they'd decided to go on a Friday. Imagine what would've happened to the school without its teachers!). Then, after about an hour's worth of them all doing nothing but recombobulating, the seven of them had eaten a quick breakfast, then begun the long journey back to civilization. But at some point, because the universe apparently still wanted them all to suffer as much as possible, a miniature landslide had swept Applejack (and Applejack alone) off her feet and dumped her into a field of blue flowers. Fortunately, she hadn't been too hurt, and she and her friends had continued onwards without giving the incident another thought—

Wait a second.

She'd fallen into a field of blue flowers.

Applejack let out a deep sigh. "Ah stepped in Poison Joke, didn't Ah?"

Why, yes. Yes she had.

---

Twilight Sparkle was feeling pretty good about herself. Sure, she'd accidentally left her Lucky Grading Pen^TM back at the spot where she and her friends had camped out at during the Friendship Retreat, but after a day of her, Starlight, and Spike somewhat-frantically searching both the school and the castle, she'd finally realized where she'd left it. Hence why she was now trotting out of the forest with a certain blue pen tucked inside of her left saddlebag.

And, unlike last time, she'd managed to stay on the path!

As Twilight continued to walk down the path out of the Everfree, she glanced over at the large field of apple trees that made up Sweet Apple Acres.

Hold on, she thought to herself, this is usually the time Applejack wakes up to tend to the fields. Seeing as I'm over here right now, I should probably go and say hello!

And so, Twilight turned off of the path, her hoofsteps twisting and turning her through the gaps in the lines of trees as her lavender eyes scanned the horizon for any signs of her earth pony friend. After a few minutes of searching, she finally spotted something.

A part of her wished she hadn't.

A gray pony with a black mane and a blue Stetson hat was bucking apple trees. This would've been a relatively normal sight, except for the fact that

1. The pony looked exactly like Applejack; aside from the colors, of course.
2. She was upside down.

To make things even more confusing, the tree had reacted to the kick in a very odd way. Like the Applejack-esque pony's kicks were impacting the tree at a lower point than they actually were.

Bewildered and somewhat frightened, albeit remaining determined, Twilight took a few steps forward.

"H-Hey!" she called out, "What are you doing over there?"

The upside down pony turned towards the source of the noise, then smiled once they saw who it belonged to.

"Oh, hey there, Twilight!" the pony replied, "...Yeah, it's me, Applejack."

"Really?"

"Yeah. Some weird magical thing or whatnot did this, in case you're wondering."

"You must've accidentally stepped in some Poison Joke at some point!"

"Yeah," Applejack sighed, "I reckon that's what happened."

"We'll have to get you into one of those remedial baths, and ASAP!"

Applejack nodded her upside down head. "Ah suppose we have to. Given the way my big brother and little sis reacted to it at breakfast, Ah think Ah'd prefer to keep this appearance a limited time deal, if ya get what Ah'm sayin'.

"Agreed. I'll go get Zecora right away—"

"Wait, hold up," Applejack cut in, "Can Ah at least finish my morning chores first?"

Twilight blinked. "You're just... going to go about your morning like normal?"

"Exactly," Applejack responded.

Twilight tilted her head in confusion. "...You aren't concerned about the fact you've completely changed color and flipped upside down?"

Applejack shrugged. "Ah mean, Ah was a little startled at first, but after Ah had some time to think it over, Ah realized that this right here... this is nothin' compared to the some of the other stuff we've been through.'"

Twilight was dumbfounded. "'This is nothing'? Applejack, have you looked at yourself?"

"Yeah, Ah have. Granted, it was kinda difficult pulling myself up to a mirror, but still. And seeing as the last time somethin' like this happened, Ah got really, really tiny, this is actually an improvement!"

She bucked the tree again, the final few apples still clinging to its branches giving way and falling into the baskets.

"And like Ah said before," she continued, "this isn't even the weirdest thing Ah've ever been through. Not just during all the world-savin' stuff, but on an everyday basis. Ah mean, one of my best friends can pull off a Sonic Rainboom. Another defies the laws of physics on a routine basis. Another goes off and has weekly tea parties with the Lord of Chaos. And the friend who's talkin' to me right now is an alicorn, for cryin' out loud!"

"Yes, that is all true," said the alicorn, "but what does it have to do with anything?"

"The point is, Twilight," Applejack continued, "Ah've seen stranger things."

…

…

…

...Just then, from out of nowhere, Pinkie Pie literally slid up to them, two drumsticks clutched in her hooves. She smacked them against a drumset (one that Twilight knew for a fact hadn't been there the last time she'd looked), a loud "Ba-dum tiss!" sounding out.

"Oooooooh, you just got feghooted!" the pink earth pony exclaimed, pointing both of her drumsticks at Twilight.

There was a long silence.

...

...

...

"...I'm sorry, what?" the gray, upside down earth pony and the lavender, right-side-up alicorn said simultaneously.

Ignoring their question, Pinkie instead looked towards Ponyville, an unreadable expression on her face. Suddenly, her eyes widened and she gasped.

"Somepony else just got feghooted!" Pinkie exclaimed, "I gotta go!"

Without another word, Pinkie dashed off into the distance. Unsure of what to say, Applejack and Twilight continued to gaze at the shrinking pink dot, desperately hoping that maybe, just maybe, she'd come back and explain herself. Alas, such satisfaction was not to be granted.

Eventually, Applejack turned to face Twilight, a small smile forming on the former's face.

"Like Ah said, Twilight," she said, cutting through the silence, "Stranger things."

THE END. (Thank Celestia...)

---

Author's Note:

I regret nothing some things.

---

In case you were wondering about the silence, then yeah, this is what I've been up to!

...Disappointing, I know.

On the bright side, I have a couple of far less nonsensical stories either in the queue or nearing completion, so hopefully we'll be able to return to our regularly-scheduled programming pretty soon...

I hope I'll see you next time!
-AP

Comments

[The Faceless Maker]

GET OFF THE STAGE!!

[PresentPerfect]

Oh. Geez. That one took me a minute.

Been a while since anyone wrote a story about toy-based shenanigans. :D

WARNING: FEGHOOTS CAN
SERIOUSLY DAMAGE YOUR HEALTH

You're goddamn right they can.

[DanyB]

It is just "meh". The story isn't bad, but it isn't great.

[Nothingofall]

Sometimes ideas are so strange that they sound awful, but they can be pulled off masterfully because the writer has a strong grasp of comedy and knows how to structure it.
This is not one of those stories.
This is an idea not nearly bizarre enough to work as random, with mediocre writing that just makes it an absolute slog to get through. It is the worst kind of pointless - it's just boring.
Better luck next time.

[TheAncientPolitzanian]

10207519
Trust me, even when I published this I knew it sucked. It's a quarter-assed crackfic, and even then it's only a crackfic in the sense that I immediately called the cops on myself and tried to write a shitty MLP fanfic in the 20 minutes before I got arrested (metaphorically speaking). Seriously, this thing was written in an hour-and-a-half at most. It helped get me out of a writing funk, but in the end that's all it was good for. It's trash.

Sorry for wasting your time.