This story is a sequel to The Thief and the Thorn
After being assigned to the maverick Jedi Master, Tempest Shadow, Rose finds herself thrown head first into a planetary conflict as her first assignment. Things will only get worse as several stories will intertwine on this world. Alliances will be made, trusts betrayed and wills tested as a confrontation, years in the making, is the inevitable result.
All the thanks and credit to Amante Animation.
Cover art provided by https://www.deviantart.com/3d4d
Chapters (16)
A pretty good start, I have to say. A few typos here and there ("scars" not "scares" XD) but still an interesting beginning!
I liked a lot of the new character parts here. Garble and Spike at the beginning I definitely approved of
And I also liked seeing Vapor Trail and Sky Stinger appear at the end.
My vote for the next chapter? I'd say "B" and send them to the tribe. Partly because I want to learn more about Tempest and Rose...
9025722
Glad you liked this start. Yeah, I need to proofread more often.
Garble is going to be the butt of a few jokes and I hope you'll enjoy the other characters that I'll be introducing as we head along. I've planned this one out for months so I hope I can reach the finish line.
B. Good choice.
Good work here!
Rose's backstory really makes me think of A'Sharad Hett in some ways... I really hope that's not a grim portent of anything. XD
Also, like the way you handled the story with Tempest/Fizzy and her tribe. Well-done, I could pretty well envision it.
A few typos here and there ("what else is knew" and "there" when it should be "their") but nothing too breaking. ^^
9456521
Thanks. I'll have to fix those errors. When I'm on a roll I tend to put proofreading on the back burner.
Good eye. I did borrow some of A'Sharad's story for Rose. He is one of my favorite characters. Time will tell whether she'll fall into the same trappings. I will say this: Once you meet the opposition everything may start to fall in place.
9456560
No worries. And glad to know that I noticed that similarity. XD
Well, definitely count me interested to see what will happen next in this story
Yeesh. That opening with Sonata and Aria... yeah they do a good job as Sith. And also, seeing Wallflower in that state - yikes.
And now we are starting to see our cast of players grow further. Sunset and her apprentice joining the story now, ooh boy, that'll be something... and also good to see Lily and Daisy, I liked their reunion with Rose.
Solid work as always. Chapter could use an editing run (I caught one instance of one of the Sith saying "are" instead of "our") but solid work all the same.
9625466
One day I'll proof read these chapters with a fine toothed comb to fix these typos.
Yeah, I wanted the beginning to show how high the stakes actually are and add a creepy factor for Sonata and the doctor. Wallflower didn't catch a break and neither is Flash.
Sunset and Zaza are going to be in for a rude welcome when they arrive as well as some more of Sunset's past being brought up. (As if she doesn't get enough of that) And I was really excited to introduce Rose's friends to the story since I wanted to add a bit more dynamic to her group and I hope to expand on more of the characters as the story progresses.
9625498
I figured that was gonna happen, and I bet that'll play some kind of role when Sunset starts to get more involved in this story.
And I also figured that Sunset and Zaza would be in for an unpleasant welcome. Most unpleasant I dare say. Ouch... Well regardless, I'm definitely looking forward to seeing where this all goes next!
Oh boy, there's gonna be trouble going ahead, I just know it. Good cliffhanger!
9803508
So much trouble ahead. Question is: Where is it coming from?
9803885
I'm definitely interested to find out where, and for that matter, who. Just my own theory, but I imagine that the Siren is not the true mastermind and that there is some other foe pulling the strings of the plot, 'cause I don't really think Sonata or Aria has quite the brains or patience for this scheming in Adagio's absence
Solid work as always. The plot thickens ever further... definitely curious to see how things will progress on all fronts - especially in regard to Rose and her own issues with the situation. Oof.
9879776
Thanks as always for the comment. Next chapter may be a bit shorter but it won't be short on development for a certain group of characters and I can't wait to get started on it.
9879839
Sounds very interesting to me. I will definitely be looking forward to it when it comes out.
9879839
Cannot wait for update!
Solid work as always. I really enjoyed the insight into Therma's past in the scene between her and Sunset. Though I must say, the real high point of the chapter for me was the scene between Zaza and Rose. I mean, I gotta say, I was getting pretty worried for what would happen there!
And now we have Sour Sweet making an appearance soon. Ooh boy, that's gonna be something...
9966336
Thanks for the review as always. I decided to break up the encounter between Rose and Zaza into two parts in the chapter to build a little tension. Nice to see it worked. Next chapter we are going to have some real fun, a lot of action and some intense moments. Things are about to get really exciting as we get to what I've been waiting to write for a long time now.
9966357
Sounds good to me. I will definitely look forward to it!
Why does no one think of using siren gems as focusing crystals?
Wouldn't calling her a Sith Lord be more recognizable?
Well shit. That was a legit drama bomb. First everything with Zaza, and then Lemon. God damn... solid work though!
Just one thing. This sentence here's a bit redundant.
Would suggest replacing one of those "instructed"s with something different. Maybe "as she trained her" instead?
10072393
Thanks. Just fixed it. This chapter took a long time to finish and after the week I just had, finishing this helped ease my mind. Yeah, a lot of stuff happened in this chapter and a whole lot is going to happen in the next. Don't forget, Fluttershy is on her way there right now. Add to that Adagio being back and Indigo hasn't even gotten the news yet.
10072405
Oof. Yeah, it's only gonna get more intense from here on out. Wow...
Well then! Cliffhanger, we meet again it seems! XD
Solid work with this chapter, although there are some stray typos here and there ("manor" - "manner," et cetera). But still, I really liked this. In particular seeing how the story's bringing together these various plot threads - Indigo, Adagio, Aria and Sonata (I winced at Aria's beating, not to mention Sonata's teeth!), Sunset and Tempest and more! I look forward to seeing where this all goes from here, especially in light of the most recent revelations among the Jedi here. Ohh boy...
10238529
Thanks. I finally thought of a way to tie these points together properly as well as fit in a surprise I hope everyone will enjoy. Hopefully I can get to the next chapter soon because it's going to be all action from every angle. Also I plan on showcasing Aria and Sonata's abilities. And the reason behind Aria's punishment will become much more obvious as will it's effects.
And yeah, thanks to Rose, a lot of bad things are about to go down.
P.S. I might wedge a mini chapter in between this one and the next.
10238623
I look forward to seeing what all you have planned for this.
A mini-chapter, hey? Could be a good idea - there are a lot of balls in the air for this plot so to speak - if it's done right, naturally.
...Well damn. That certainly was heavy.
So, seems like poor Wallflower is going to be turned into something like Grievous, I suppose? Damn... That's a big "ouch" right there. Especially given Patchwork's clinical "interest" in the whole proceedings. They remind me just a wee bit of General Deathshead, except that Patch doesn't (yet) have the same... enthusiasm... that Deathshead did. (One little typo in that though - should be "all for naught".)
And then there's Adagio. Her section of the chapter was also pretty spooky, gave me a bit of a Palpatinean feel, but that bit at the very end offers something of interest for how this might play out in the future... Zaza, is that you still there in some degree? Hmm... (Another itty-bitty typo: "lend" when it should be "leaned" against the wall.)
Good work all around!
...split personality?
10301057
Almost. It would be simpler that way. The best I can describe it is "residual emotions" left over from her previous self. Adagio is back to her original body but with extra baggage from said previous self tacked on.
...Well damn.
I got nothing else to say! 
10318224
Your response is well and truly justified. I wanted this chapter to have maximum impact and I'd say it just about did it.
10318247
Yeah! I mean, I know I kinda got into a rut of saying that the previous chapters were heavy, or drama bombs, but yeah, this one has them all beat in that regard! XD
10318254
Yeah, It was a lot to take in and this chapter is really something I had envisioned for a while. A lot happened here and the fallout in the next chapter is not going to be fun.
10318278
I will be waiting for that next chapter, with mingled anticipation and dread. XD
How is that different from a Sith?
10556862
The same way that Qui-Gon Jinn and Jolee Bindo are described as a maverick among the Jedi. Jedi like him don't follow the Jedi code to a T but they also don't follow the teachings of the Darkside of the force.
Whoa. This dropped some serious bombshells. Particularly that ending line.
I'm intrigued by the ongoing struggle with Adagio and wondering how that will all conclude. I want to hope for a good outcome, but well, I'm also nervous of hoping too much XD
Ooh dang. And here we go. Heading into a major battle... the climactic one, perhaps? I'm wondering...
And also, dang, Flurry Heart is willing to go to scarily monstrous lengths here. And what Patchwork reconstructed Wallflower into... yikes. That is a scary thought for sure.
And boy, I was on the tips of my toes watching that sequence between Rose and Adagio. Man that felt like a close call. XD
On a side note, I quite enjoyed the character insight we got into Garble when he gives Rose a much-needed talking to. That was nicely done.
*whistles* Damn. There was some striking action in this chapter. Therma versus Sonata was already a highlight (the thought of those Siren teeth is a damned scary one I can assure you) but - no pun intended, I promise - I have to hand it to you, Fluttershy versus Wallflower's Grievous-type form was a real standout. And jeez, I know that Fluttershy's Element saved her life, but Lord do I feel bad for the idea of Wallflower having to face the realization of what she's become.
And here we stand, at another cliffhanger. "But..." Heh. But *what*? I'm almost afraid to find out. XD
11172791
Appreciate the reviews. Yeah, a lot is about to go down and that "But" is going to have serious consequences. Now it's time to see whether I can stick the landing with this final chapter. Fingers crossed.
Damn. There were quite a few twists and turns in this chapter. A moment of silence for Flash Sentry, may he rest in peace...
And as always, I'm looking forward to seeing where things go next!
Dang. Not a bad job at all with the spaceship battle action in this chapter. Rest in peace, Wallflower. Your sacrifice will not be forgotten.
As always, looking forward to seeing where things go next in this climactic arc!
Thanks for the review as always. The space battle was hard to do with balancing and I still don't feel I got it completely the way I wanted to but I'm pressing forward to the climax of this story so stay tuned. This is where it hopefully all comes together.
Finally sat down to read this. Not a bad finish, even if some plot points were a bit truncated. I did like the core material, particularly regarding Adagio and Sonata, as well as Rose. So I'm glad to see those story elements end on a solid note.
All told, I'm glad to have followed this story to the end. Thanks for sharing it!
11439085
Thanks. Yeah, I know a lot of it felt rushed. I'm blaming myself for thinking too big. But I wanted to get this finished up since I'd taken so long to wrap it up. Honestly, I want to go back and touch it up with what I initially left out. Reading it back, I need to keep a list for if I do go and rewrite this final chapter.
But thanks for staying with me until the end, even if it wasn't the greatest conclusion.
11439151
Regardless of whether or not you ever decide to edit or rework this conclusion, that's still an achievement in my book. ^_^
Fair enough. And hey, you managed to wrangle together a finish for this plot, right?