EqueTitan
Joined 29th Feb, 2016 ·
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Incomplete and an epilogue? Are you sure it wasn't a prologue instead?
8910897
Thank you for catching that ^^;
8911203
I gotta ask, is this it or is there more to this story?
8911921
Given the fact that the story states that it's incomplete there is still more to come
8912189
I know that, the way it was written and how short it was confused me a little.
I hope you plan on continuing this, i love storys where spike is the main, but 1 where he's a hero are rare.
8912544
Don't worry there's more to come 😉
OK... I think, no, I believe that I fallen for this story.
Is time to wait for the next chapter (creo que voy a estar ansioso asta que este el siguiente capÃtulo, y que no lo avandonases EqueTitan :'/)
Pero solo es de tener un poco de paciencia verdad
ヘ(≧▽≦ヘ)♪
If I may say as a retired fan-fiction author reading this, your writing skills are seriously underdeveloped. You have small chapters of just blunt exposition. Informing your audience of the story's context is important, but it would be far more appealing to the readers if the details and contextual circumstances were being told by the characters during the story. The best exposition is always subtle. Your story is riddled with errors, has poor punctuation, and the sentence structure is bad. I'll dissect one of your sentences and hopefully highlight some of the problems.
I'm confused. Are the creatures only called Viperichonyc as some sort of nickname, or is it a group of Viperichonyc? The past tense of lead is led. What do you mean "they attacked the Dragon Lands"? Did you mean the Viperichonyc were attacking the dragon population in the Dragon Lands? Again, I'm just confused. How did they appear? Like, from nothing at all? Was the attack successful? Why are they assaulting Equestria while still also attacking the Dragon Lands? To give you some inspiration, I'm going to rewrite the sentence.
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Please update