The Olden World

by Czar_Yoshi

The Last Trial

The dark alicorn in the altar bowl looked expectantly at Starlight, and Starlight's ears fell. Something deep within her screamed not to disappoint this mare, and not out of fear. It was a feeling she couldn't possibly place, like she was watching something that deserved reverence, obedience and awe. She owed them. They had done something special.

"I..." Starlight fumbled for words. "What can I do?"

The reflection seemed to approve. I can see your heart. You have friends, but you're still lonely. You're afraid they might leave you, or be taken away. You want to be strong enough to stop it. Starlight felt her gaze drawn up to the crowd of illusions, still locked in their bows. Don't you wish they'd stay?

Starlight swallowed. "Yes, but not like that. I don't need to force them to kneel or do anything! My friends would never leave me. Ever. I just need to protect them and keep them safe."

You want to hold onto what's yours? The reflection chuckled, showing sphinxlike fangs. That's what the Nightmare Modules are for. A thousand years ago, the bearer of the Immortal Dream created them as keys to the soul. The world has six Elements of Harmony, Starlight Glimmer: Generosity, Honesty, Laughter, Kindness, Loyalty, and the Spark, which brings the others together. Together, they're powered by the Magic of Friendship. So what's a creature to do, Starlight, when like you, they're all alone?

"But I'm not alone." Starlight felt herself tremble. "I have my friends."

Where? The reflection shrugged. All I see are illusions. She frowned, almost apologetic, and added, You're better off than the Bearer was. But you're still alone. You can use her Nightmare Modules, can't you? I see you have one already.

"I... Well, yes?" Starlight's trembles increased. "But that's because I used moon glass."

The alicorn in the stars didn't seem to care. The Nightmare Modules were created to fill the void in the Elements of Harmony, functioning where they do not function, made in the absence of friendship and camaraderie. The Elements of Harmony are self-perpetuating, designed to be infinite. Where there is life, light and friendship, they create more. The Elements of Loneliness, as befitting opposites, do the reverse: they seek to end the emotion that empowers them. The Bearer created them so that she would be loved, worshipped, surrounded by those with the capacity to care and able to take their light for herself. They were made for someone with problems like yours. In you I see the same pain and striving for companionship that afflicted the Bearer so. You can use them.

"But I didn't come here for Nightmare Modules," Starlight protested, uncertain.

Didn't you come here to save a friend? The reflection looked vaguely smug. Or the friend of a friend? Whatever your answer, the reason is the same. When was the last time you did anything that wasn't for the sake of jealously protecting your friends?

Starlight thought, and didn't have an answer. "This is supposed to be where an evil monk is imprisoned," she pointed out. "Not where the Nightmare Modules are kept. I thought they were kept at the grand temple."

It is. Where do you think the Bearer's children got the Nightmare Modules to keep in the temple? The alicorn inspected her with one slitted, probing eye. When the Elements of Loneliness were stolen, sitting on display without adequate defenses, they realized the error of their ways and sent Yanavan here instead. If anyone else might seek him out to steal the Bearer's gifts in turn, shouldn't he be protected in the same way as the originals?

Starlight felt another wave of pain in her head, her earlier headache not having abated. "But I don't want any Nightmare Modules. I just want to get my friends out safely and wake up!"

The reflection curled its lip. The trials don't discriminate against who enters. You'll have to survive or succumb to them just like anyone else. It returned to a smile that was almost motherly. But you'll do just fine. You're no stranger to being alone. When you have to choose between trusting your friends without you and risk losing them forever to keep them by your side, you'll know what to do.

"No I won't!" Starlight stomped in protest. "How is there an answer!? Leaving Valey behind hurt, but it would have hurt more if I made her come and got her killed!" She narrowed her eyes. "And besides, your trials are broken. I didn't even have to choose. I could have just used the shadow cloak."

Exactly. The dark alicorn beamed, looking immeasurably proud of itself. The Nightmare Modules were created so you wouldn't have to choose. You understand the point of this cave.

"Oh..." Starlight swallowed.

The alicorn watched her, seeming to expect something further, so Starlight spoke. "But I don't get it. You said this is protecting the Nightmare Modules? It sounds like you're trying to make me want them. Shouldn't you be trying to make me go away?"

The reflection chuckled. Mmm hmm hmm... Perhaps. Except you've already shown me the sincerity of your heart. Your pain and desire are written on your face for the whole world to see. At the same time, you're reticent. You haven't even asked for them yet. You may still be in the middle of the trial, but I'm starting to fear you'll earn them and then leave without your reward. Starlight, do you fear the powers of disharmony to be a bad thing?

Starlight hesitated. "Well..." She glanced up at the bowing illusions. "I have touched a harmonic flame before, and it felt good. But even though I feel like I'm forgetting something, being moon glassed like this isn't that bad. I think?"

That's up to you to decide, the reflection said. I know what you're thinking. 'Can't I have both?' and then 'I can't, because I used the moon glass.' That's a lie. The harmonic thing when you lost your friends to the bridge would have been to tell Maple what you had done. You could have done it.

Starlight felt her ears fall. "I don't know a lot about religion or harmony," she murmured. "I just want my friends."

"You just don't want to be alone," the alicorn finished, her voice suddenly audible instead of only in Starlight's head. "Behold."

The waters shimmered and the reflection distorted, returning to stillness once again as an image of Starlight, perfectly mirroring herself. But then the sky behind her glowed, and when Starlight could look again, she was surrounded by rings of light. The Starlight in the altar bowl was hovering, arcane sigils rotating around her barrel and behind her back and head, stretching out into a pair of runic wings that flexed and flowed, yet didn't need to flap to keep her aloft. Her horn was replaced with a blade of light, and a glowing sword with a triangular hole in the hilt floated at her side, making her acutely conscious of her own possession of Gerardo's. The reflection even wore her usual saddlebags, and around it, in the stars, she could see her bowing friends, just like the illusions in the chapel.

"You could become a goddess for them," her Nightmare Module voice continued aloud in her ears. "You could rewrite reality itself to keep them safe. Alicorns are made, not born. The tools exist in the world for you to do it."

Starlight cringed backwards at the image. "Stop making them be bowing! I don't want my friends to bow to me! I want someone to look up to, not someone to look down on! I hate being the best!"

A sense of caution rippled across the air. Her friends, both the illusions in the chamber and the worshippers in the bowl, got to their hooves, smiling at her... and one by one they turned, turning their backs on her and slowly walking away.

"The Bearer," the voice whispered in her ear, "was a goddess. She created an entire race of ponies as an expression of the innermost hope and optimism in her soul. Sarosians are called the ponies of the night because the night is the realm of dreams, and they are made of hopes and dreams. And even the Bearer was left alone."

Starlight felt a tightness in her throat as her tears threatened to return. "Why are you showing me this? What do you want from me!?"

"For you to understand that this is the way," Goddess-Starlight lamented, voice defeated and low. "The only solution ever created. Some who have friends can use the powers of harmony to retain that. To do so, you trust. Trust given, met with trust returned, builds more trust until you have relationships that can survive any hardship. But what about when it isn't? What happens when you're left all alone, and have no friendship left for the power of harmony?"

Starlight swallowed, the effigy's words still ringing in her Nightmare Module voice. "You're not Glimmer, are you?"

Her reflection blinked, confused. "Am I you? I'm the guardian of this place." The water rippled again, and then the dark alicorn had returned. "I apologize if that form was confusing."

"Oh." Starlight looked away. "When I'm alone, I... I keep trying?"

"You try," the dark alicorn confirmed. "And you feel pain, because it isn't possible for one pony to be enough. Friendship is a force between ponies. It isn't a dance you can have alone."

Starlight gritted her teeth. "But I'm not alone! I have friends!"

Self-consciously, she looked around the room. It was empty.

"And you have pain," the reflection finished for her. "And loneliness enough that the Nightmare Modules have power for you. Jealousy, for when things you want threaten to leave. Deception, for when you wouldn't be accepted as you are. Cowardice, for when others laugh at you, not with you. Cruelty, for when oblivion is the greatest kindness. Treason, a repository of secrets with which none are worthy of trust. And Tyranny, for when you need to become the center of everything."

Starlight took a step back. "I-I don't want to be a tyrant, or rule my friends."

The armored alicorn's eyes followed her from the basin. "But it will work. No matter what you do, they can leave you. No matter how strong you get, they can choose not to repay you. This is the solution. Look deep within yourself and ask: even if it revolts you, if ruling your friends isn't the way, isn't it better than being alone?"

Starlight hated herself for being asked that question. She knew the answer... but she wasn't about to give it. "No." Her eyes hardened. "It doesn't matter whether it is or not, because that would be giving up. Even if something is better than it could be, that doesn't mean it's as good as it should be, and it doesn't mean I want it!"

The water in the basin rippled again. Slowly, the alicorn's coat lightened, though it was still nearly black. Her teeth receded, the armor vanished from her fur, and her slitted pupils widened until they were round like a normal pony. "Congratulations, Starlight Glimmer," she calmly praised, voice calmer and less metallic than the Nightmare Module voice the earlier image had used. "You have passed. The Nightmare Modules may have been created with a purpose, but in the end, they are nothing more than tools powered by emotion. Perhaps you will be able to use them better than their creator."

"What?" Starlight blinked. "No, I don't want-"

Initiating transfer, the voice said, her new Nightmare Module voice. It was a voice befitting the deep need she felt looking earlier at the mural, starry and ephemeral, and she liked it much more than the old one... though her heart still clenched at the realization of what it was about to do. Downloading system update. Initializing... Core system functionality restored to 85.7%. System restore from backup is advised. Ending update sequence.

"What did you do...?" Starlight croaked, though she knew without asking. She could feel the new spells inside her heart, already had the knowledge of how to use them. "I told you, I didn't want these!"

The alicorn in the basin watched her with sad eyes. "They are tools without agency, Starlight Glimmer. Their purpose is only what their wielder uses them for. You proved that you won't put them to the one use they have already seen too much of, no matter how it might suit your desires. May they find a better wielder in you than I was."

A wave of nameless emotion swept through Starlight, but she knew there were no more answers. She stepped up to the altar, stared straight down into it, and took Gerardo's sword in her mouth. Its blade, she suddenly remembered, could cut anything, even stone.

The alicorn folded her ears, bowed her head, closed her eyes, and waited.

Starlight trembled, holding the sword up... and set it down, shaking. "You're supposed to be perfect!" she yelled down at the water, disturbing its surface with her breath.

The reflection didn't move.

"I can feel it!" Starlight shouted at the basin, her trembles increasing. "This isn't like when I look at my friends and see them being bright! There's something about you that... that..." She swallowed. "I feel like I owe you something. I just... I don't want..." She folded her ears. "I'm done with this place. I have some friends to get out of here, and then I'm never using moon glass again. For anything. And maybe someday, I'll meet whoever you're supposed to be. You sound like you have more issues with friends than I do."

Turning her back on the altar, she flung the door open. "...If you were real, I'd offer you a hug," she promised without looking over her shoulder. "It's what my friends would do." And then she was gone.

Comments

[Mini-Joe]

good guy glimmer

[Hap]

Oh god.

Why do you do this? Why do you make me cry?

[Boopers]

85.7%? That means she now has 6 of 7 nightmare modules, right? But aren't Dorable and Chauncey both in possession of a nightmare module? How can Startlight possibly be only missing one of them?
edit: Never mind, I read the next chapter. I guess there just are multiple copies of each module around? I wonder, since Starlight destroyed the first module she got, are there copies of that one around as well?

[Alchemik]

In the (arguably only) wise words from Blackjack: "Do Better."