The Olden World

by Czar_Yoshi

The Filly Who Could

Starlight sat in a corner of the Immortal Dream's trashed library huddled under a poncho, her mind spinning high-speed circles with no substance at all. Her magic was back and her vision wasn't gray, but it wasn't her familiar teal aura that greeted her as she tested what she could do.

Books floated past her in hazes of midnight blue, deep and pure and bending to her will, despite looking like they belonged to anyone else. She tugged at pages, straightening them and smoothing spines, and the irony was too bitter for words how she finally had a cutie mark and the first thing she was doing was reshelving fallen books.

She knew she had asked for it. She knew she had been prepared to do anything to protect her friends, and whatever she had done was enough. But two things stuck in her heart and prevented her from living with it and moving on. First, it hadn't been necessary after all. She tried to take it to get out of Chrysalis's machine, and had gotten out a completely different way instead. Probably. The events were muddled by adrenaline in her mind, but the more she thought about it, the more she knew she had this mark for no reason at all.

And second, she felt no different whatsoever.

Her magic might have been stronger, or have a better buffer before she hurt herself, or even be fixed altogether. But if it came with any special cutie mark powers, like Maple's pocketing or Valey's danger sense, she had no idea how to activate them. It didn't help that she had a hazy idea of what all the Artifice of Hope actually did, but for her, it was seemingly nothing.

She felt no different. Her mind had none of the telltale signs that something was missing or changed, like when she used moon glass. And that meant that all her fears so long ago about not wanting a cutie mark in the first place were for nothing. She put herself through all of that for-

"Those are some intense thoughts you're thinking, there."

Starlight blinked, jolted out of her thoughts by Valey standing right in front of her. "Aaah!"

Valey grinned apologetically. "Sorry. Nice aura, by the way."

Starlight's eyes fell. "I guess."

"Hey." Valey offered a wing. "Wanna go for a fly? You look like you wish you were anywhere else, and going fast always helps me with that."

"Sure." Starlight stood up. Fresh air might not be so bad...

In less than a second, she was on Valey's back, being carried up and out the door.

---

Wind tore at Starlight's mane, and at the apex of their ascent, Valey tossed her, rolling over and catching Starlight on her chest before backstroking through the air. Starlight had tumbled from far too many heights to be startled by the sensation, and almost wanted to dive just to test her current magic's strength with a crystal shield hitting the water.

"There we go," Valey said, skimming through the clouds, flying so that she could see Starlight's eyes. "So. Ironflanks wanted me to get you to chill and read stuff, but you don't look very in the mood."

"Are you happy I got you back?" Starlight asked.

"Over the moon, kiddo." Valey slowly pivoted. "So what's with the regret?"

Starlight folded her ears. "I'm just not feeling very good. About everything."

"Being stuck out here had you down too, huh?" Valey raised an eyebrow, flying lazily.

Starlight bit her lip and hung on tight, refusing to answer.

"Hey, what's up?" Valey pulled up, hovering, holding Starlight by the shoulders. "You've had a bad time, but I don't get it as well as I'd like to. Tell me about the stuff that's on your mind."

"I have a cutie mark now," Starlight mumbled. "It feels weird having one after trying so hard not to months ago."

"Yeah, I saw while you were sleeping last night." Valey continued her hover, the land's topography visible like a map around them. "What else?"

Starlight sighed, feeling like she was slowly tugging out a thorn. "And it doesn't do anything. I don't feel any different. All the times I cared about it before were pointless."

Valey tapped her nose. "They weren't pointless if they put you where you are today. Maybe they didn't go the way you wanted, but they weren't pointless. What else is bothering you?"

"Nothing." Starlight looked away. "That's all."

"Neat." Valey tipped backwards and resumed her backstroke. "So it wouldn't be too sensitive a subject if I asked how you got me back? Last thing I remember was basically dying of pain in the arena, and suddenly I'm here with a pendant."

Starlight's eyes shadowed. "Which part? Where I used the Nightmare Modules and got everyone back from Chrysalis, or where I went inside and found you among all the others?"

"Used the Nightmare Modules? A little specific there, kiddo." Valey grinned slightly. "Tell me about that. You somehow ran off that madmare?"

"Yes," Starlight grunted, wishing Valey would stop probing.

Valey didn't. "You know, when I stomp jerks who are threatening my friends or being evil, it usually makes me feel pretty good. Remember when we beat up Gazelle together in Izvaldi?"

Starlight frowned.

"Listen." Valey pulled up again. "Jamjars might be the one who's bragging about it, but I and everyone else know it was you who got me back, and saved everyone in Grandbell in the first place. I owe you everything. There is absolutely something you don't wanna talk about and I'm not kid-savvy enough to tease it out any more gently, so please believe me on this: whatever's got you tied up, you can trust me. And if it hurts saying it, it'll hurt a whole lot more keeping it bottled up."

"I'm going to destroy the world someday," Starlight whispered.

Valey utterly blinked. "What?"

"I've seen it in two visions now," Starlight went on, her chest tight. "When I touched the harmonic flames in Ironridge and Grandbell. I saw the world covered in falling ash, and you were there, only older. And there were dead shells that looked like drained batponies, and there were other ponies who were dying, and there was a black wave that ended both of them. And I thought the first one was just strange, but now I've seen two. And when I went in the moon glass by accident and wound up finding you..." She swallowed. "Do you remember anything about it? Anything at all?"

"Nope." Valey shook her head. "Like waking up and knowing you probably dreamed, except it feels like seconds ago you were falling asleep and have no idea what it was."

"Chrysalis was there," Starlight went on. "It was like being in a dream. She told me the world was made up of everyone's strongest memories. My memory was the falling ash from my visions."

Valey's ears swiveled. "Your strongest memory, huh? Then how come I never heard you talk about these more than really vaguely once or twice? And how does this have anything to do with you? If you were getting visions of the future, which sounds a little weird but is maybe possible, wouldn't the whole point be to change them?"

Starlight sighed. "I don't know. But the other me kept saying things and I think she's from that future and used to be me, and she kept saying I'd do something..."

Valey tilted her head and frowned. "And nothing more specific? Sounds pretty rude of her to me."

"She didn't need to be," Starlight mumbled. "I crossed the mountains on hoof, saved Ironridge from windigoes, can use Nightmare Modules, fought off Chrysalis and got you back out of the moon glass. The stronger I feel about something and the harder I try, the more I can do. I don't know if there's anything I can't do, and I don't know why. But the other me kept saying if I didn't learn to stop trying when there was still something I could do and let bad things happen to my friends or worse, I'd keep doing things like this and eventually break or become the bad guy or try this hard to get something I shouldn't! I don't want to be strong enough not to do anything about Chrysalis, but I don't want us to all have died there either! I want to not have needed to be that strong in the first place!"

Valey held her for a while, making sure she was finished. "So to sum all that up, you're scarily strong enough that even you're scared of yourself."

Starlight squeezed her eyes shut and nodded.

"Good news: been there, you're not alone." Valey ruffled her mane. "Bad news: I honestly don't have the best solution either. Kind of riding a high right now from being alive, but I think cleaning clocks when we need to and just watching out for our friends is how we have to do things. More good news, though: right now our friends are suffering from a severe case of being stranded, desperate and messed up, and not any evil dudes or crazy monsters. Which means you and me don't need to stomp anyone at the moment to keep them safe. I'm getting this ship back to civilization, and then you and me are gonna kick back and leave helping our friends to the experts. How's that sound?"

Starlight just clung to her.

"You cool with that?" Valey craned her neck, poking Starlight's shoulder.

"Mmph."

"You're not talking to me," Valey warned. "I can't help you if you don't wanna let out what you're dealing with."

Starlight just kept clinging, and Valey sighed. "Well, I'll do what I can for you. Let's go get back and see Ironflanks. She's waiting for us. But don't think I'm gonna let you get away with saving my butt and being miserable as a result. We'll talk more later."

Comments

[Phoenix Kitten]

She's not miserable because she saved you, Valey, she's miserable because by all accounts, she shouldn't have been able to save you, but she did anyway.

While Starlight was going on about how strong her determination is, all I could hear in my head was Makoto Naegi going "I guess I'm a little more gung-ho than most people." in the first Danganronpa.

[Oberth Effect]

Well that aura color change is going to be difficult to hide. Wonder what explanation Starlight is going to offer the rest of the crew. It’s interesting that it seems to be the same color as the harmony extracted from Starlight, too.

Looks like this Valey isn’t going to know Starlight’s full name.

I find it curious how everyone’s memory in the moon glass seemed to be from their past, while Starlight’s appears to be from the future. In addition, I don’t think we saw anyone’s memory entities interacting beyond when Starlight/Chrysalis were involved, but the ash from Starlight’s memory was present for everyone. Maybe the moon glass recognizes that Starlight and Glimmer are the same, and is showing Starlight the strongest memory of Glimmer?

[Venlinelle]

Books floated past her in hazes of midnight blue, deep and pure and bending to her will, despite looking like they belonged to anyone else. She tugged at pages, straightening them and smoothing spines, and the irony was too bitter for words how she finally had a cutie mark and the first thing she was doing was reshelving fallen books.

That is hilarious. Sorry Starlight.