The Olden World

by Czar_Yoshi

In Your Head

Starlight crawled free from the pile of ponies in her bed, sleepily climbing over Valey and dropping softly to the floor. When had Valey gotten there? She shook her head as the batpony's sides gently rose and fell. Maple hadn't slept well last night, she could tell just from touching her, and with how her mother responded to physical contact and cuddles, it was probably a good turn from one friend to another.

The smell of rain drifted coolly through her cracked window, along with a gray, overcast-noon light. Starlight walked to it, reached up and pushed the window open wider. With all the body heat from Maple, Amber and Valey in the same pile, it would probably make the rest of their sleep even more comfortable.

Amber shifted at the chill, nuzzling slightly into Maple's neck and pawing with a hoof for someone to wrap it around. Starlight watched them for a moment longer, then nodded in satisfaction. Much as she was still tired and it looked like a cozy place to stay, she had things to do and think about.

First of all: was that voice in her mind that came with being gray still around, even when she was normal? She felt like she remembered it saying something the first time she touched the Nightmare Module, before it even did anything to her...

Nightmare Module emulation mode is currently disabled.

That was nice, Starlight thought to herself against a rainless backdrop as she trotted down the cabin. Really, the harmonic comet didn't need to resist all weather... So what could the voice actually do for her like this? She needed to know things, specifically about Chauncey.

Nightmare Module emulation mode is currently disabled. A catalyst is required to re-engage.

Okay, maybe that wasn't so helpful. Starlight sighed. Was there anything her voice could actually do besides tell her she wasn't gray unless she found more moon glass?

"You look lost in thought."

Starlight jumped hard at the sound of her own voice, entire coat prickling from surprise... and she beheld herself sitting in the library, a perfect mirror image resting in a reading chair. She blinked several times to clear her head, then swallowed. "It's you."

"Hello again." Glimmer nodded politely from the chair. "It is, in fact, you. Or however you've decided to think of me."

"...I still don't know what you are," Starlight said dubiously. "Something caused by touching moon glass? Maybe the harmonic flame in Ironridge? Are you some sort of leftover from when I came back after disappearing that time? I don't feel like I'm hallucinating..."

Glimmer shrugged. "I'm whatever you're most comfortable with. It doesn't really matter. Whatever you decide is good enough for both of us."

"What are you here for, then?" Starlight raised an eyebrow. "You never actually do anything, you know. Every... Both times you've shown up before, you just leave again without doing anything. So why show up at all?"

"Don't look at me." Glimmer raised an eyebrow, leaning forward and half-looking like she wanted to get out of the chair. "You're the one who would otherwise be trying to figure things out in your own head. It just seemed like it would be more productive if you had a real face to talk to instead."

Starlight sighed, figuring she might as well get a chair of her own if this was going to take a while, unlike every time before. "So what are you going to tell me? Something sinister about moon glass? Something I need to know about Izvaldi?"

"I can't tell you anything you don't know or couldn't figure out for yourself," Glimmer apologized. "All I can do is help you with priorities or remind you of things you might be ignoring. What do you know about how your friends are doing, right now?"

"I think they're okay?" Starlight looked over her shoulder. "Shinespark is recovering and Amber didn't go with us. Everyone's together though. Gerardo isn't fazed by anything."

Glimmer nodded. "And what are you doing right now?"

"Thinking about Nightmare Modules." Starlight frowned, flicking her ears. "It's important. They've probably got enough to deal with already without worrying about Chauncey. I was hoping my... voice could tell me a way to take his away, or something. What's happening down there is still a problem. And if I could get them for myself instead, I'd be more powerful if I ever had to use them as a last resort."

"...You are, are you?" Glimmer sighed. "You think having less to worry about will help your friends deal with the worries they have? Have you ever considered it might be easier to find an answer to a problem rather than removing the problem entirely?"

"Easier?" Starlight blinked. "What's the difference?"

Glimmer got up and started pacing, not looking at Starlight. "Chauncey is a pony who does bad things. Whether or not you want to call him a bad pony is up to you, but right now you're looking for ways to stop him or fight back. Right?" She turned and continued pacing. "You could find a way to stop him and make him harmless. I'm certain of it. You defeated a swarm of windigoes and crossed an uncrossable mountain range, after all. Or, you could find a way to live with the fact that some ponies do bad things."

Starlight curled her lip. "Why would I do that when I can do something better? Are you saying I shouldn't help everyone he's hurting or taking advantage of? That I should just let things like Stanza exist?"

Glimmer winced slightly at the mention of Stanza. "Ponies will always commit atrocities, Starlight. Even as harmonic beings, if the world could be perfect, don't you think it would have been long ago?"

"...I don't know a lot about history," Starlight admitted. "That doesn't mean I shouldn't do something about it when someone's hurting my friends and there's something I can do."

Glimmer closed her eyes for a moment. "So because you can, you have to. And you're very talented, Starlight. You'll have to look a lot harder than you are right now if you want to find something you can't do anything about. You definitely can stop Chauncey if you try."

Starlight worked her jaw, that precise wording triggering something in her mind. "I don't have to do anything. That's why I didn't want a cutie mark in the first place."

"Well." Glimmer shrugged. "I guess that's your decision. But if you do keep trying to solve every problem you find instead of learning to live with them, how long will it take until you're trying to take responsibility for the whole world? The world isn't perfect, and the ponies who can't live with that are the ones who do things like Chauncey."

"I..." Starlight narrowed her eyes, trying to see through her duplicate. "What are you getting at? What do you want?"

"I don't have an agenda," Glimmer said. "I told you, I'm just here to give you someone better to talk to than the inside of your head."

Starlight scrutinized the other filly for a moment longer, then sighed. "Maple didn't sleep well last night. I heard Valey talking about how she wasn't okay with this either. My friends aren't okay with this, and I'm not going to sit back and not help them. What do you propose I do instead?"

Glimmer tilted her head. "Everything you're worrying about and arguing over with your enemies? What the difference is between being alive or an automaton, gods and goddesses, souls, life, foals and obsidian..." She shook her head. "All that is just philosophy. Ponies who can afford to? They think about these things for a living. It's a little bit different for you because you actually have the means to get answers, but there are books in this very ship's library about it. In fact, I think you brought one down from the mountains a long time ago."

She pointed at a nearby bookshelf, and Starlight adamantly made a point of not looking.

"I don't have any more answers than you do." Glimmer shrugged, turning back to Starlight. "But if it makes things easier, none of you are thinking about these things alone. Anyway. I hope you can live in peace with whatever you think, learn and whatever comes your way."

Before Starlight could respond, with no magical effects or fanfare whatsoever, Glimmer was gone.

Comments

[Zapdroid]

Half-baked theory with very little thought put into it: With how Glimmer reacted to the mention of Stanza, does that signify anything? Perhaps she is the Night Mother? Or more likely it means nothing at all and it was a completely normal reaction to a disturbing subject.

[fanreader999999]

111 chapters in but haven't broken 200k words yet. Hrm.

As for the story, its interesting but... waterlogged? The story spends a disproportionate amount of time describing EVERYTHING. I get that some things need to be described (ie. what a character looks like), but other things are dragged out to the point that a lot of it feels like a "write now, edit never"-mindset (Sosa is a Sosan from Sosa I guess). The mining district is hot and has pipes? Uh huh. The place with 'sky' in the name is windy and cold? Uh huh. The hotel is a hotel? Actually I have no idea, I skipped this part.

That said, I haven't read Austraeoh.

[Czar_Yoshi]

9488544 Yeah, that's a conscious choice in how the story is written. It's a style that doesn't click for everyone, unfortunately, but it is that way on purpose.

[Zapdroid]

There hasn’t been an update yet, why isn’t there an update yet?!?! ARE THEY DEAD OR IS THIS JUST A WAKING NIGHTMARE?!?! I need my daily dose of this story before I go into withdrawal... please help me