The Olden World

by Czar_Yoshi

Just Kiss Already

"Mmm... nnngrmmmph..."

Valey was cold. Terribly so, like she had been frozen from the inside out and left in a dark place for weeks on end. She could move, but didn't have the energy to shiver. Fortunately, something warm and fuzzy and pony-sized was pressed against her, and she snuggled it for all she was worth, brain moving at a glacial pace.

She had been... with friends. Maple needed comforting. She had been fighting someone. Her wings hurt at the bases, the same way they had in Ironridge after she spent too long shadow sneaking in mares' shower stalls on particularly lonely days. She had...

The realization of what it was she was snuggling hit her mind all at once, and gave her enough of a burst of energy to open her eyes and jump away. "Yaaaaa-" Her hind legs immediately became tangled in fabric, and she hit the floor, the cold numbing every bit of pain.

"You!" Valey scrambled backwards on her rear, dragging several blankets with her, still too slow to process her surroundings as Puddles sat up in front of her, blinking owlishly. "Puddles! You... brrbrrbrrr..."

"Hiya," Puddles replied, neither exuberant nor sultry. "You're lucky I have magical cold resistance, you know, because you're cold. No normal pony in their right mind would snuggle you right now."

"And whose fault is that?" Valey gritted her teeth; it felt like there was frost inside her body. "Bananas, I hate losing! Grrrr..." She wrapped her wings around herself. "D-D-Dumb contact magic... Feels like I'm gonna freeze to death..."

Puddles beatifically smirked, sitting on a bed and patting a stack of blankets piled ten high. "If you do, that's your fault. You're the one who got out of bed."

Valey blinked, mind working frantically to speed back up. "...You iced me just so I'd be forced to cuddle you to stay warm?"

"It had some other purposes, but yes, I did. I know my priorities." Puddles kept up her smug grin, then grew serious. "Now get back in here. I may have overestimated just how much your pony bodies can take before going into a deep freeze, and I've never tried to thaw anyone before, so you could get seriously hurt if you're a baby about this. Hug hug!" She made plenty of room for Valey, inviting the batpony back to her side.

"I hate you," Valey grumbled, pacing sluggishly back to the bed and letting herself be hauled in.

"Mmmmmmhmmhmhmhm!" Puddles hummed in delight, nestling against Valey as hard as she could and rubbing her with her face. "You're fun too."

The worst part was, it felt legitimately good. As cold as Valey was, ten blankets and another pony curled tightly around her made a big difference, and as Puddles took turns nuzzling and playing with her hooves, feeling actually began to return to her extremities. She was still frozen at the core, though, like every breath and heartbeat she took were made at half speed.

...No, that was the second-worst part. She could have, should have, absolutely would have enjoyed every second of it and even reciprocated if she didn't already have a marefriend. They were in a room, there was a door, Valey saw her hat on a peg... This was one call she wasn't looking forward to making. How did one even explain to their significant other they had lost a fight against an enemy who was obsessed with cuddles and now her life depended on doing just that?

"Heehee," Puddles murmured, moving up a bit and starting to nuzzle Valey's leafy ears. "These are cold, too. Can't forget about them!"

"I hate you so much," Valey repeated, thinking her ears were pressed against her skull but not able to feel them enough to tell. "Could you at least do this platonically?"

"Platonically, pfeh." Puddles huffed, snorting a breath in one of Valey's ears. "I don't do romance. Too much giving and not enough taking. This is plenty platonic. Valeyyy, snuggle me back!"

Valey refused to budge as Puddles kept hugging over her, trying to maximize the contact area between them. "Yeah, right now you're in the daughter of a mare who looks like she could punch my head off with a single hit, and I really don't need reasons for her to be mad at me. And I'm pretty sure she said she was like... a kid when you possessed her."

Puddles shrugged against her. "Her body grew up. And I told you, Puddles is no longer in here. Just me! Hmm, I need a name now that I'm free..."

Rather than helping think one up, Valey snorted. "You're free, my butt. The moment I get back on my hooves I'll clean your clock, we'll go outside, and I'll get someone or other to tie you up even tighter than before."

"Sure you will." Puddles nuzzled her way up and down Valey's chest.

"Bananas, you need a doll or something," Valey sighed. "And yeah, I will!"

Puddles continued nosing her way up until her and Valey's noses were touching. "I have a doll," she whispered, making contact with her eerie, pupilless eyes. "It's you! I just wish you'd hug back. You obviously think this feels good, both now and before. So why won't you let yourself enjoy it? Hmm?"

Valey gritted her teeth. "I told you, because I already have a marefriend!" She waited for a moment, then deflated as Puddles didn't stop nuzzling. "You know, because relationships are special? You wanna be one hundred percent there for someone else, which means not going around and... you know? Or maybe you don't?"

"I don't know what you're talking about, because right now, we've clearly got each other all to ourselves. Yay, relationship!" Puddles pressed a hoof against Valey's nose and stared back into her eyes. "So enjoy it!"

"I... But there's... emotions and... Bananas." Valey's ears folded. "You're really that clueless, aren't you?"

"If I am, you're the one it's stopping from having a good time," Puddles pointed out, ceasing her nuzzling. "You're clearly missing the point. I am a superior life form. I've evolved to the point where anything I want, I can get. I wanted you, I got you. Case in point. And in my infinite generosity, because I want to revel in being a harmonic creature, I am offering to share my good time with you. It really doesn't matter whether I'm clueless or not, because I want what I have and I have what I want and I'm not the one refusing to enjoy it over reasons that don't make sense."

Puddles looked completely satisfied in her defense of her case. Valey cringed. "Yeah, you know, you're starting to remind me uncomfortably of the way I used to be, here, and take it from someone who knows: it's totally possible to convince yourself that the rawest deal imaginable is totally normal and fine, for like six whole years of garbage, and make yourself think you're happy and that there's nothing better worth aiming for, and... Ugh, why am I trying to convince a windigo to be a good guy? I've been spending too much time around Ironflanks..."

"Oh, is it, now?" Puddles looked interested. "See, I haven't had my head buried in the sand about things that are bigger and better for six years, Valey. I just had the rawest deal imaginable! Yesterday, even! And then I went from being a shackled and chained lab experiment to a free mare, all because of you. If you think I'm stopping here, you're a fool! Whatever else is out there for life to offer me, I will find it! But..." She nuzzled Valey's ears once again. "The only stupid thing for me to do would be not stopping to enjoy the perks I've just gotten. Like you. Mmmmm..."

"I'm not a perk! I'm a pony!" Valey winced as Puddles ran her muzzle across her cheek. She still didn't know if that was technically true, but for the sake of argument... "What do you even think you have, a sack of meat in a fuzzy coat? I'm serious, do you have any idea what you're missing out on by underestimating us?"

"Oh, pfft. Are you talking about your soul?" Puddles freed a hoof and waved it over her shoulder. "I don't care about those. Fuzzy hugs are exactly what I want! Windigoes don't have physical bodies, you know. But this pony gets all warm and tingly inside when she snuggles with cute mares, and it really makes it an interesting and delightful place to be."

Valey grinned; she saw an opening. "Don't care about souls, huh? Thoughts, emotions, feelings? Yeah, that's the part I missed out on too. But it turns out, you can follow around or stare at as many mares as you want, and as satisfying as it feels at first... it never gets more satisfying. You said you want to find out what else there is for life to offer you? Try getting to know someone. Having someone else care about you, be known by you or want to be known by you! Bananas, I barely hung out with Amber for a few days and I'm really invested in her because we actually clicked together. So seriously, I may not be the most qualified to say this, but you're missing something even bigger than whatever you think you have."

Puddles returned the grin, eyes like glacial lakes. "So you're saying you know how to one-up even this."

"I... uhh..." Valey hadn't actually expected Puddles to go along with it. "Yeah?"

"Tough, because I don't buy it." Puddles instantly dashed her hopes, dragging her face through Valey's chest fluff. "Here's the thing. I think I've got a great deal. There's no self-delusion involved; I know what I had, and I know how much better this is. You're saying you have a better deal, but that they're mutually exclusive. That I'd have to respect you and stop using you like a hugging toy to get it. Next thing I know, you'll also tell me I'm not allowed to break into establishments or vandalize fountains with ice sculptures. Think you're going to twist the windigo to the side of caring about lovey-dovey pony feelings and emotions?" Like a shark, she slid so that they were again face to face. "Because from where I'm standing, there's a very easy way to do it."

"Buh...?" Valey's ears folded.

Puddles gave a cheery wink. "Show me they're not mutually exclusive! Enjoy yourself a little, Valey. Innocent little snuggles. I know you want to, and are holding yourself back. And what kind of caring lover would this Amber be if she didn't want you enjoying yourself while you were far apart? I'm not asking anything dirty or dangerous, and believe me, I do know about those. Now show me being in cute little pony love doesn't make you a boring stick in the mud and prevent you from enjoying having a real, physical body, and I'll give your feelings some of my time."

"...Bananas, I hate you," Valey grumbled, moving her own limbs and putting them around Puddles. "I don't even know what the good thing to do is, here..."

Puddles gave an audible squee at the hug, doubling her own grip on Valey and rocking back and forth beneath the blankets. "Depends on your morality system, but the only one that matters to me is to look after yourself and ditch whatever losers can't keep up. I'm already breaking that by sharing with you, but any system where taking care of yourself isn't a good thing is useless to me. Good choice! Also, see? I'm trying to make you happy! Awww, Puddles cares about your feelings already! Yay!"

"Don't patronize me!" Valey protested, a disgruntled spark inside her telling her that she held in her limbs an extremely frustrating mare who was begging for that frustration to be taken out through aggressive snuggling... but it was just an empty body belonging to a pony who had deserved none of the things that happened to her, under the control of a chaotic, wintery puppeteer. Her frustration drained, washed away by a wave of lucidity at the sheer absurdity of the situation. A mythical demon, powerful enough to destroy an entire city, and somehow all it wanted was for her to snuggle its possessed pony body. She actually laughed. Any knowledge about how that situation had come about didn't matter, because if this was an illogical dream, it was a whole lot better than what real life could throw at her.

Chuckling helplessly, Valey hugged Puddles, but didn't burrow into her coat with any of the enthusiasm the earth pony had. "Bananas, Amber probably wouldn't believe me even if I told her exactly what just happened. I don't get you at all. Have your stupid hugs. Heh heh heh..."

"Yay! Now you get it!" Puddles cheered, going limp and letting herself be used as a pillow. "Relax and enjoy yourself! Yeah! Heeheehee..."

"Could you not laugh like that?" Valey requested, looking up. "It reminds me of... uhh... her, and is making this even more awkward than it already is."

Puddles rolled her eyes and obliged, settling for tucking Valey's forehead beneath her chin.

"Also, I'm still seriously cold. This is gonna wear off, right?"

"I hope so." Puddles shrugged. "I only bullied the manager into giving us this hotel room for two nights, so if you're not up by tomorrow, I'll have to carry you. And high adventure when you can barely move doesn't sound all that fun."

Valey narrowed her eyes. "High adventure? Yeah, right. I'm still slugging you and then hauling you back to Chauncey and the hospital the moment I get my strength back. In fact, I bet I could take you on right now. There's gonna be a lot of dudes ticked at you after that fight."

"Ooh, are you?" Puddles smiled so hard, Valey felt her chin stretching with the top of her head. "Don't be so sure about that..."

"Yeah? Why not?" Valey frowned. "I'm at my best right after a loss, because I've got something to prove. And now I know how you fight, too!"

Puddles sounded confused. "Fighting? I wasn't fighting. I was trying to hug you, Valey! Mmmmmmmm!" She happily tousled Valey's emerald mane with her face.

"Nnngh..." Valey grimaced. "Fine, whatever. What makes you think you can stop me?"

"Are these feeling better yet?" Puddles asked, playing with Valey's ears. "What can cute Valey hear?"

"Don't call me cute." Valey freed a hoof and rubbed it over her ears, brushing Puddles away. "I, uhh... Something in the distance? I dunno, wind?"

Puddles kicked the blankets off, still hugging Valey. Valey shivered at the sudden influx of non-heated air, and was immediately popped onto Puddles' back as the other mare got up. "Here. Feast your eyes!"

She trotted across the room, which Valey was finally able to examine. Square, small, and dark, with a wooden-plank floor bearing a coat of varnish that might have been a hundred years old and plaster that looked like it was applied directly to log walls, it had one door, one small, well-furnished bed, a tiny table, and a low, wide window with the curtains drawn. Definitely a budget hotel, all right.

"If you try to tell me we're here for a honeymoon..." Valey growled. "Where in Izvaldi are we, anyway? Bananas, this architecture looks kinda different, but I wasn't really paying attention..."

Rather than answer, Puddles cheerfully flung the curtains open, revealing the sea.

"Buhhhhh..." Valey's jaw went slack for a moment. "Wait, what? How!? I thought we were bajillions of miles inland! There's supposed to be a whole 'nother province west of Izvaldi before this! What did you do!?"

"Convinced some speedy friends we were worth giving a ride." Puddles shrugged, balancing Valey on her back. "Far away, isn't it? As far as everyone else knows, we could be anywhere in the continent, and even if they trace our route Wallace is gone, so I can smash whatever they send to get me. And even if you take me down, good luck carrying me all the way back there without breaking any laws."

Valey stared for a moment, a gentle grassy slope separating their room from a trunk-strewn beach with the ocean beyond. It looked like an overly pleasant day out, with a few distant clouds and a stallion playing catch with two foals out on the field.

"It's also a great spot for a vacation," Puddles added, turning so she could grin at Valey.

"Pretty sure I said this. I still hate you." Valey buried her face in Puddles' mane in frustration.

Comments

[Boopers]

She needs a name? How about 'Cuddles'?

[Cold Bolt]

I love how we get this chapter right after Twilight and Rainbow commenting on all the cuddling in the story.

[Hap]

It feels like the author is writing a fetish... A very softcore version of one.

[Czar_Yoshi]

9314427 In-world, that very well might be what Puddles thinks she's doing.

[Lexicon_Spark]

Ok, I know this chapter came out ages ago, but I have to voice my current prediction:
I think Puddles is going to use the Nightmare Module to steal Valey's memories and turn her into her own personal snugglehorse.

[Venlinelle]

9388262
A snorse, if you will.

[Venlinelle]

It’s a bit jarring that Valey suddenly cares so much about exclusivity. Not that she can’t have changed her mind on that, obviously, but it feels like, if she did, we didn’t really see the process.

Reread edit: I still kind of feel this way. Valey and Amber had their whole talk about this, and obviously Valey didn’t exactly take it to heart, which is understandable, but I don’t know how much indication we actually see of that before it matters in this chapter.

[sploopy slooder]

i mean for a wedigo puddles seems surprisingly....not evil? very not good and definitely chaotic but she coulda killed a ton of people and didnt. best case happy ending would be to find puddles a new body so kid puddles can go back to normal.