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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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I have a bad feeling, she has a 100% chance to get pregnant, will she be able to take advantage of it with Shining ??
-Thorax Chrysalisson.
Poor Thorax he has no clue on how messed up things are and how he could have just exasperated them.
Just that last word alone killed me! XD
Wow, best ending..
Great update for this story, though I just had a thought, would Princess Twilight think to go to Human Equestria and look for the Shining Armor there to see if she might try to fuck him?
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Nice, also I like how you used Vinyl in the story too, I always thought she looked like a female Shining Armor due to her fur and mane/tail colors.
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Yes. And will name her daughter Luster Dawn
Twilight...you have issues.
Okay... first off, not going to lie mate, wasn't one of your stronger chapters. Now of course you acknowledged that, but I think I see where your struggle is.
You think you could have done more. Well, allow me to assuage your concerns you couldn't. This one, I think, wasn't meant to be some great erotica scene or deep analysis of how fucked up Twilight, it was written too, in my opinion, cover up a few plot holes and of course deliver a joke, albeit not one of your better ones. Its not the pony Pulitzer, but its done all it needed to do without holding things up or being filler.
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exacerbated
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Spike X Thorax (as Rarity) and Twilight x Thorax (as Shining Armor).
Both times ending in completion
A double whammy of Unf!
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Now, is that to say it was bad? Of course not
My version of bad if in a sudden lurch in tone (Shinigh Armor raped to death by thestrals while a guffawing Nightmare looks on and has herself tongue punched by Cranky Doodle, for example) one that uses pony mouth pieces to extol ones political or societal whatevers, or ones that are just shit (looking at you Fall of Equestria.)
Was it not up to your previous works? No, but it wasn't supposed to be, in my opinion
Mmmh. Quiche.
Oo this is a amazing chapter. just call Thorax the bedding bug.
dragons and pony's can reproduce ,, this is going to turn out interesting.
Sad, followed by humorously horrifying.
This chapter was inspired by a comment in 32 and me wasn't it?
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The outline for this story was written in the autumn of 2017 and has changed very little since then. So no.
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I've changed it
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It started out partially as a rewrite/alternate-version. But now it's so much more.
Oh that is so.... TWISTED
Lmao!
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This was an amazing chapter btw.
Woo! Finally finished getting to the latest chapter! Not nearly as much incest and Twi-Shining as I would have wanted, but this latest chapter is nice consolation methinks. Weird, by acceptable. I just gotta ask though: how much longer is this story going to be? Because I remember you saying this would be a slow burn, but dude, I didn't think it'd be THIS slow of a burn. Dude, we're like, a quarter million words in and legit Twi-Shining incest has accounted for relatively few scenes and Twi isn't even pregnant by him yet and no one knows about Celestia's plan. This is getting a little bit redonkulous dude, and I just really hope that one things get crazy and everypony's banging a family member and knocking them up and making beautiful incest babies like real horses that it's suitably crazy, because by this point and all this insane levels of build up, I think the audience has earned their stroke fest they've been anticipating for, well, a quarter million words. Seriously, War and Peace is like, only double the length of this fic and even considering how old it is and the style it was written in, got more to the point without making someone read something else for a little bit before coming back to it like I had to for this story.
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You make good points.
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I'm glad you agree. I thought you'd be angry since my criticisms tend not to come off as constructive since I'm very much an emotional wreck subject to gut reactions and shooting from the hip like Dash without thinking of the consequences. But yeah, I like your story. I like it a lot. I especially love the beginning with Velvet and Nightie, but once the story shifted over to what was supposed to be it primary focus, who you said would be its primary focus, it just k ind fell flat a lot and I had to power through it and read other porn fics and junk to get through a lot of it because, again, not a whole lot of sexy things happen between Twilie and Shining when you examine everything to really sustain one's need to jerk. And that can be fine. A little bothersome, but fine... so long as you deliver on the promise and premise of the fic in the end, which I hope you do to justify this long ass run time.
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Unlike the abrupt end of LP1,
the payoff of the ending of LP2 WILL be proportionate to the length of the story.
I made sure of that from the very start of the outline process years ago.
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Love you for that :'v
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Good. So long as realize that it must be suitably hot and incesty and inbreedy and steamy and crazy and so many other wonderfully perverted and hot things and intend to make it so, I'll trust you.
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Poor thorax, getting treated like a sex doll
Was this in Stormageddon? I feel like it was in Stormageddon. Or the fic that stormageddon was a sequel to.
She would be Freud's favorite patient. Actually, scratch that. She's Freud's muse and inspiration.
Translation: Find the bitch who traumatized my brother, pay her back ten fold, and hope that senpai is so grateful he'll finally see that I'm the best choice.
Hmm. Chapter 1 gives us a glimpse into how things ultimately end for the alicorn family, but what about the adopted dragon brother? What will his ultimate fate be, I wonder.
Now that's what I call a cursed ending to a chapter.
Quiche lol
Well, I think I'm going to have weird thoughts on my mind next time I eat quiche.
I don't know why I'm still reading this. I wouldn't usually touch something like this, but it's so fucked up I can't stop. That's not an insult to the author or anything, if anything it's a compliment.
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I assure you, I interpreted it as such.
Given how everyone is working out their problems, Twilight is totally going to try getting Thorax to disguise himself as Cadance so he can get a quickie from Shiny, then come back and have another quickie with Twilie...
On a slightly lighter note, Thorax might be the best thing that ever happened to the princess sisters.
Close enough.
Bugwaifu's are the best. They feed on love and other emotions and as long it's mutually beneficial one has ever Partner one can ever have...
Huh... Wonder how the eggs will taste
Awesome worldbuilding!♡
So Spike came in Twilight by Proxy?
Thorax might never again go hungry giving his friends their desires. Lust can make a foundation for blooming love?
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Fixed! Thank you.
Absolutely priceless 👍