Duke Moon II
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I for one really liked this start. Although the long dialogue on Spikes past could've been in flashback form, it still was pleasing to read and visualize. Also, I wanna see how all of this goes down. If you need a prereader or edior, Im more than happy to help you out. Good luck on this monumental project, and I hope it is well recieved.
P.S: When a girl calls you her baby brother during an intense make-out session, that intensity dies like an erection going flat when the mood's killed, only faster and it leaves ypu with an emotional scar.........
#JustSaiyan
Well, I'm gonna follow this and see where it takes me.
This, I will be following.
Loved the opening very much. I can't wait to see more of this.
Not too shabby :)
Type o.'s here and there , but i don't care this is Spike shipping and i love it. And the beast part is that this is humanized, this is so going into http://www.fimfiction.net/group/206214/spike-and-mares-humanized-shipping
can't wait to see what kind hijinks the girls pull to win over spike
I really liked it, even though it had a few errors here and there (like an occasional missing word)
I can't wait to see this harem take place, and the "Mature" rating to be put to use
NICE
5770789 I'll try to do better for the next chapter.
Not bad, a word of advice though, add an extra entre between paragraphs. It removes the wall of text feeling and tends to just make the tory more visually appealing to a reader opening it up for the first time.
Looking forward to seeing this play out.
UPDATE!
Update?
Marvelous job, my friend. I can't wait to see the next chapter where Spike gives the girls the gifts he had for them. And I wonder who else he'll meet in this new school, and what kind of girls will take a shine to him. I eagerly await your next chapter. And if you require suggestions and ideas I am always opened to help.
6239050
I'm just hoping for a smaller gap between chapters.
I'm the antagonist. I've: tied you're girlfriend to the railroad tracks, put a bomb on a bridge and ate puppies for dinner... no reason, I'm just evil... AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!
I'll admit, this was pretty interesting. Nice to see that Fluttershy has not only a sweet side, but a seductive one as well... man, this story has a lot of possibilities.
6239130
Thanks!
....awww. that's so sweet. Too bad for Shining though, but Twilight's got resevations for a private dinner with Spike, and have already convinced the staff that they will not have seen anything if their reputations are worth keepin.....a very 'private' dinner indeed...hehehehehe
I couldn't help it. Shining threatens Spike with the standard 'you hurt her, I hurt you and make you disappear' threat because it's his little sister. At times it just seems so cliché that I just want Spike to say, "Well I will remember that while Twi's bouncing me on my lap/crotch and she has those looks in her eyes that say she's gonna eat me alive" right in front of Shining's face. (Yes, I'm aware that pretty much would make Spike an asshole and it would be grossly OOC, but sometimes you want to have a bit of Charlie Sheen in his personality)
I just typed this while reading, so advise: I haven't seen the rest yet, this was a heat of the moment type of thing. And I haven't read the rest of the chapter yet.
Now I've read the latest chapter.
Regardless of what Featherweight says, that ain't luck, that, my boy, it is skill and just Spike being Spike, unlike Blueblood (going off on this, I kinda was expecting like a friendly rivalry, like he knows he's the big man on campus but knows Spike's probably got that now from jump, and now Blue is just gonna compete and be at least cordial and honestly friendly around Spike, not another issue where Blueblood's an asshole and the obvious bad guy.) And of course, the antagonist has to have his idiot minions that have more muscles than brains.
Did like the vignettes with all the characters. Each one was well placed and characterized. Really gets the sense that's it your typical high school, and that there is already a little way to how the school works.
Luna as the School Nurse instead of the Vice Principal==definitely new to me. I'm looking forward to more of Nurse Luna, origianlly I thought she would be Cadence but it's refreshing to change the status quo a bit.
And then that little kiss at the end. :
So cute. 
Boy he's got a charmed existence, doesn't he?
Until next chapter!!
Ah, you mean like this?
pre03.deviantart.net/06a2/th/pre/f/2013/128/6/5/humanized_fluttershy_by_amy30535-d64luf7.jpg
Yeah, I'd appreciate her smiles, too.
You know i got to ask before i read is blue blood the antagonist or minion of the antagonist.
Edit nevermind read it and the i'm leaving the building.
Put up the next one plz
7031617
Already working on it.
Preview on my Deviantart page.
Duke moon ll keeping it coming man your doing a good job
Great job. And I sure hope you can get the next chapter in sooner than before. I was worried this would never update again.
Trixe and her band? Blue blood and his gang or the dasslings?
Whenever you have people thinking in a paragraph, the whole thing is in italics.
Cult of Butterflies, huh? What's next, the Apple Enthusiasts? The Supernova Force? The Rainbolt Brigade? The Balloonatics? The Diamond Dogs? The Wand Alliance? The Sunyang Gang? The Starstream Team?...
already a target.
So they're going to get giant loaves of bread and squish him to death? Well, good thing he didn't say hamburger meat, because that would imply he'd be turned to ground beef.
Anyways, nice chapter. See you later.
7144946
Thanks for pointing those out.
Want to be one of my proofreaders?
7145440 Sure, sounds like a promising investment.
Hopefully the wait won't be as long
Awesome job, and I do hope you won't have any trouble with the next one.
I know this is a cliche, but in actuality you don't want to use water to neutralize spicy foods. Water can't neutralize the burning feeling of spicy foods. A better solution would be to use dairy products like milk.
How to Neutralize Hot Foods in the Mouth
Here is a source on it in case you think I'm lying.
Should be using milk instead of water...
Great chapter, I can't wait to see the ass-kicking to follow this.
please continue the story. Can't wait to see what happen
Fantastic job as always my friend. After their lunch break I can't wait to see what happens to them when they get back to school. And nice touch making Ember the daughter of the true head of the cult. She may be tough and merciless to her gang, but secretly has a soft spot for Spike. Carry on my friend.
Wow, keep it up
7145440 I was wondering why did you not go for the first set up for chapter 4?
7620891 As I explained in my blogpost, I didn't want to take the story into a dark place. I mean, I could have, but decided not to. Didn't feel right to me.
7642558 Exactly!
7642567 was just surprised no one had posted this before me
Great job, I liked Luna's pep talk with Spike, and I look forward to Spike and Twilight doing star gazing.
It's being a bit off-topic, but since Twilight and the other girls weren't getting expelled (thank goodness for that BTW, expulsion pretty much would be a death knell for the story; can't have Spike being the BMOC if all of his main girls are no longer there, and it would require a complete rewrite if indeed they did wanted to go the expulsion route to make it work), how many of the students did get suspended, and personally because I'm starting to think that I'm a slight sadist, who did get expelled?? I know that IRL, fights, whether intentional or accidental would be automatic 3-5 day suspension at least (or at least in my former high school, but then again that's close to 15 years ago--man I'm getting old
) So who actually had the nuts to fight Spike?
Wonder how Spike got that Little lamb nickname from Luna.
7664336 Spike got it in the chapter "High School is a Brave New World."
7664322 Spike got those bruises in the previous chapter.
What's the plot for the next chapter?