- Member Since 9th Mar, 2014
- offline last seen Jun 20th, 2018
scribe-feather
A frequent pegasus who posts infrequent stories.
scribe-feather
Joined 9th Mar, 2014 ·
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Should be losing.
This is a perfect example of "The path to hell is paved with good intentions".
It's cute and fluffy with a surprisingly dark edge to it. Maybe Twilight accidentally permanently regresses him.
But the progression is fairly realistic with that slow, insidious weathering away of Shining Armor's adulthood.
One flaw, why not just find or develop a modified stasis spell that locks the target's age?
5661250
Thank you for point that out. Fixed.
5662107
Magic is always a difficult thing to write about and set limitations for. I'm just going to write away any other possible alternative with "can't do it because magic" so the story's pathing can seem more linear.
The i in fine is capitalized.
And here we are again, where you write a story and I read it and say how much I liked it and wonder what the constraints of the commission were and how you worked within them as some twisted AB version of "Art of the Dress" plays in the back of my mind.
This fic, compared to your other fics, seemed to be overall a lot less about the actual diaper usage and fetishy stuff and more about exploring Shining Armor's character and his relationships as he slowly regresses. And I liked it. His dialogs with Twilight are funny and in-character, and I enjoyed their banter.
That's not to say that some bits seemed unnecessary. Chapter 1 (not the first chapter, because of the numbering), didn't really strike me as something that advanced the story, developed the characters, or catered to fetishes in any meaningful way. A lot of it is Twilight reiterating what she felt in chapter 0, and Spike hiding the book from her didn't really make sense to me. But once we actually introduced Shining Armor and started regressing him, I enjoyed the fic a lot more. His interactions with Twilight are adorable and well-written.
Part of me is curious to see how Twilight's behavior would go from here. She is headed down a dark path of tampering with her friends' minds without their consent for her own benefit, and if they started to figure out what she was doing, they would likely be horrified and fight her. And that's an interesting conflict, because it's ultimately about Twilight's selfish misguided love conflicted with her friends' best interests, which is a conflict that I feel doesn't get enough exposure in writing.
Some thoughts that occurred to me as I was reading:
"Oh I'm sure you'd just LOVE that. Being the big sister and everything,"
Oh, ho! So the regression is already starting to show. Now I'm going to have to go back and see if I can find any mention of Twilight subtly casting magic.
Once again, I love the way you write dream sequences. You have a firm grasp on dream logic and time in dreams, and you show it well.
"Part of Shining Armor's mind wanted to believe Cadence and was entirely convinced that this morning was just a flook."
I'm pretty sure it's spelled "fluke", but maybe it changes based on geography?
At first, one thing nagging on my mind was that Shining had a job. He's Captain of the Guard, but the fic didn't seem to address how his regression affected that. But then you covered it, and all was good again.
Good work as always.
5662614 I have to say that was pretty good... Maybe in a week or so you could do one for me... That would be cool considering my birthday is on the First of March. But Im sure you are pretty busy with other things...
was decent but could have benefited from being longer to make the feels about the character's actions more real.....
cute like really adorable kawaii type