• Member Since 14th Jul, 2014
  • offline last seen Sunday

Cora Zone Unicorn


I am a 20 year old brony from FL. I write stories featuring Fluttershy (BEST PONY!!!), and a few about my favorite ships, 90% being Flimjack. I also have an MLP audio series on my YouTube channel.

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This story is a sequel to When Maud Met Boulder


Pinkie Pie is asked to babysit Boulder by her big sister Maud while she and their father go out of town for the day.

All goes well until Pinkie loses her sister's pet rock when playing with him in the front yard.

And so begins the origin of the game "Camouflage."

Cover art made by PrinceCelestia

Chapters (1)
Comments ( 23 )

Oh, it was so cute! I had lot of fun, when I read it. Sorry for my English :) I'm not good at it, because it isn't my language, by the way.
But... fiction is so pretty!

5447820 I'm happy you enjoyed and I think your English is great

5447830 Can I translate your story? I'll send you link, when I'm done.

5448147 Sure you can translate it if you want.

Also if you want to do the prequel, that's cool too

5448156 Thanks! Thanks! Thanks! Now I happy :3

lol. I love this. There is just something about Maud getting the game idea from Pinkie that makes sense.

5450386 Yeah, a commentator pitched the idea on my other Maud Pie story and thought it would be great for a sequel... Of course, I asked permission first

The cuteness continues! Maud is such a wonderful big sister to Pinkie, really sweet :heart:

5451925 Well, Maud IS the Best Pie EVER!!!

5451983 :duck: (We should have a Maud Emoticon now)

I wanna play some Camouflage right now! :pinkiehappy:

The two of sisters looked up to see a stallion with a muted yellow fur coat, and a short light and dark grey striped mane and tail.

This sounds like a Tarot Card. The "of" is superfluous.

"Now, Pinkie make sure you take good care of Boulder," Maud told her sister.

Missing comma.

She looked at Boulder, whom was in her other hoof.

"Who." And here is why:

OK, here's the quick and dirty tip. Like "whom," the pronoun "him" ends with "m." When you're trying to decide whether to use "who" or "whom," ask yourself if the answer to the question would be "he" or "him."

That's the trick: if you can answer the question being asked with "him," then use "whom," and it's easy to remember because they both end with "m." For example, if you're trying to ask, "Who (or whom) do you love?" The answer would be "I love him." "Him" ends with an "m," so you know to use "whom."

But if you are trying to ask, "Who (or whom) stepped on Squiggly?" the answer would be "He stepped on Squiggly." There's no "m," so you know to use "who."

So that's the quick and dirty trick: if you can't remember that you use "whom" when you are referring to the object of the sentence, just remember that "him" equals "whom.

Source

...she said, giving him a hoofrub.

Like a foot rub? Or a hand rub?- Wait, hand rub sounds dirty. Or a back rub? Does a rock have hooves?

Pinkie was panicking even inside even more.

This is superfluous.

That was adorable. Pinkie Pie was so sweet. And then there is Maud. That uncompromising, enterprising, anything but tranquilizing- Right on Maud.

~KBO.:twilightsmile:

Zero Dislikes. You earned it, this story is heartwarming.

Aww, both this and the first story are adorable! Wonderful job!

5648004
You're welcome, and thank you for the follow!

This is a very nice story that could easily be canon. Well done! :pinkiesmile:

Maud and Pinkie are great sisters and I really enjoy reading stories about both of them. This story was cute and I enjoyed how Pinkie managed to flip the situation in her usual zany way. It was also fun to see her interactions with Boulder; probably why she's so good with Gummy, heh.

The ground is gravelly, not gravely. The ground has gravel in it, it’s not serious and stern. Cute fic!

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