I am a Princess. For two years, I was the only one in Equestria. And so, for two years, I guided the nation forward towards prosperity.
Okay, that isn't quite right. That makes it sound as if everything was smooth sailing. But it wasn't. Especially when the greatest enemy isn't somewhere out there - it's right here, in the Palace. Ponies know it as the Royal Court of Equestria.
Forget King Sombra and Queen Chrysalis. They are the opposition in exile. The Court is the opposition in residence. Nopony else knows how difficult it is to get anything done as a Princess. But I do. And soon, so will you.
My name is Twilight Sparkle. Princess Twilight Sparkle. And this is the story of my two-year long struggle to change Equestria. Whether I was successful or not... well, that's for you to find out.
Inspired heavily by and based on Yes Minister and its novelization, by Jonathan Lynn and Antony Jay. It is also worth noting that this story happens over the course of Season 4, the opening chapter occurring in the immediate aftermath of Castle Mane-ia.
I approve of this.
In the "read later" pile it goes.
There is another good* crossover with "Yes, minister" somewhere on site, but I don't remember the title. Maybe I'll try to dig it up afterward.
*I am assuming this is good also. I don't feel particularly daring in making the assumption.
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Well, I do believe that I wrote another Yes Minister crossover myself, but I'm not sure if that's the one you have in mind.
4258239
......derp.
Yes, that's the one I was thinking of, and I'm sorry for my inability to remember people and things
I don't know anything about the series this is based on, but I like what I see.
Oh, wow.
I remember seeing this show alongside my mom a few years back and already I wanna put the hurt on Mente for being too much of an obnoxious corrupt bureaucrat.
That would not be good, but at least it would make me feel better and while I was at it, remind him WHY the Court exists. Celestia certainly didn't spend a thousand years in reign thinking that the Court was there to serve her. It's this one paragraph that stands out: "She might be labouring under the impression that the Court works together towards the interests of the country."
4259033
Hm. Honestly, I'm a bit confused by what you said - primarily the charges of corruption - mostly because, in this first chapter, I don't think I portrayed Mente as all that bad a pony. Certainly not as bad as he's going to be in future chapters. At least this time he had a halfway decent excuse.
Of course, one of the main things I didn't really like about Yes Minister was that, personally, I felt that Hacker didn't win nearly often enough. Realistic, certainly, because seeing as Hacker was inexperienced compared to Sir Humphrey he couldn't be expected to win very much. But I want to give Twilight a lot more success this time around, so she's going to have an invaluable asset soon. So don't worry; Mente is going to have a lot of (non-physical, unfortunately) hurt applied to him soon enough.
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Don't worry about it. I forget all sorts of important things all the time too. Unfortunately for me those usually turn out to be deadlines.
So that's why the Iron Throne only has a Small Council!
Well here's hoping Twilight manages to (while not cure) treat the worst of the corruption in the system.
This is darned good. It deserves more attention.
Very awesome, can't wait for more.
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Thank you for the vote of confidence!
The most telling line the chapter.
This is brilliant. What I find most funny is that I too am working on the Princess Twilight nepotism idea, and with a small mention of Applejack with the exact same situation.
Anyway, I must ask, have you read My Little Pony: Bureaucracy is Politic ?
Also, have you watched BBC's The Thick of It? This story reminds me of that along with Yes, Minister or The New Statesman
4274651
You know what you have to do then.
4344286
Thank you. I wish you luck with your own story, and don't forget to link it to me when you're done!
I haven't read My Little Pony: Bureaucracy is Politic (can't find it with my search engine either) nor have I watched The New Stateman. I have heard of The Thick of It and know a little about it, but I haven't really watched it either. Technically I haven't even watched Yes Minister, but I am very familiar with its novelisation and that of Yes Prime Minister, both of which are currently sitting under the table I'm sitting in front of as I type this.
Everyone... I owe you all an apology.
I'm so sorry this took so long. I've been putting this off and doing other things for ages now, and I really shouldn't have. And as a warning; I also have exams soon after this, so there may not be anything new at regular intervals until after the exams are over.
In the meantime, however, in light of how long this took to write, I am considering a change in format. Instead of posting everything at once, I can split the chapters up into separate days per entry, making my updates more frequent (hopefully). What do you all think? If any of you could give your views in the comments section below that would be great, because as of yet I'm still undecided.
Since Equestria is still a monarchy that would be the point I would start subtly working to "take care" of him. Focusing on the strength of the government rather than from the people, shows his care only for his own power. As such so long as he's in their he won't do what's needed for the realm.
In a government like the U.S. that would be the point he'd be offered a choice, either submit a resignation claiming he's served long enough and needs a break" or use these statements to (expletive) him in Congress and the American peoples eyes, forcing him out due to the sheer political pressure. While at the same time making clear you can handle opposition, son long as its for the benefit of the country not the government, not a select few, the country as a whole.
As for the defense and intelligence ministries, a failure to share information? Possibly jeopardizing security, I wonder why that sounds fami- NINE FREAKIN ELEVEN!!!! Admittedly that was more a failure of the various parts of the intelligence community not working together but the similarities are still there.
*Grins* Glad to see this is back. I'm fine waiting for more entries. I prefer this style because it means everything flows well and I can keep track of it all. I think doing daily posts would result in needing to reread a lot of previous posts to remember what's happening.
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Hm... it's not so much about caring for his own power so much as the power of the government as a whole... but I digress. Perhaps that might be the case, but Twilight isn't the sort of pony who would do that. Yet. And subsequent chapters might reveal that she has less power than it may seem in a monarchy.
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Well... you see, I have two main personal reasons for splitting the chapters up into multiple parts. The first is, admittedly, more publicity. The second is to give me more morale; a big factor contributing to the delay of this update was that I was constantly daunted by the sheer volume of unfinished work the chapter required to be completed. I wanted to downsize the packages into smaller, more discrete parts to keep my spirits up.
All in all, of course, this would keep updates more frequent as well. But you don't have to read the chapter until I finish all the days covering the event. Let me explain by showing you what it would look like in terms of chapters. Each line represents a new FIMFiction chapter, but not a full event.
[Chapter name]: Foreword
[1st Day]
[2nd Day]
[3rd Day]
[Name of next chapter]: Foreword
[1st Day]
[2nd Day]
And so on.
So if you want to read everything at once so you don't need to reread anything, you can just wait until I finish a full event's worth of chapters, then read all of it at once. The events will be separated by Forewords, setting the background for the respective event and denoting where the actual chapters begin and end. What do you think?
4971116 I think you have way more faith in my self control than I do.
If I see an update I'm gonna read it as I really love this fic.
I can definitely understand if the chapters feels daunting at their current lengths. Ultimately what I vote is what will make you happiest writing. If that means shorter more frequent chapters, then that's cool by me. I always dislike when I discover a story is causing an author discomfort. I end up feeling guilty for enjoying something troubling them y'know?
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I personally like smaller chapters as they are easier to digest and I don't have to set aside time for them. But, I will still read regardless, just not right away.
As for this chapter, it was excellent. Nice to see the scales falling from Twilight's eyes. Icain does have an impossible job. I think she see now why Celestia and Luna don't really go out and fix stuff.
Princesses should use their minions.
And here it is, everybody. This is the trial run of the day-by-day system, so don't forget to leave your opinions on things in the comments! I realise nothing of much substance was actually said in this chapter, but I am dangling a few hooks here and there... so remember to watch out for future plot points!
EDIT: Please note that the time of posting of this chapter in relation to that of the previous chapter is in no way reflective of the frequency of future chapter publications. With the end-of-year exams approaching I may not be able to post as often until those obligations pass. Thanks for bearing with me, everyone!
honestly I don't like this story that much.
The idea that the princesses play a passive role overlooks the fact they personally beat Discord the first time he was defeated and that Cadance is a princess and she was both half the reason the changelings were defeated and the reason Sombra was delayed. Twilight's smart enough to notice that and point it out.
Overall this story just makes me want to see a story where Twilight removes herself from power to be a simple librarian and refuses to play the politics game because she finds it wrong.
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Hm... I can't argue with you not liking the story, everyone has their own tastes after all. But I ought to point out that the first time Discord was defeated was more than a thousand years ago; not only have circumstances changed, but at the present time there are alternatives to sending in the Princesses - which would be the Elements of Harmony, and now whatever the Court manages to find. As for the issue of Cadance, the Crystal Empire is recognised as a separate state from Equestria, and since Mente is an Equestrian advisor he is only claiming that the Equestrian sovereigns, Celestia and Luna, take a passive role as a result of his advice, not Cadance, who was never a ruler of anything until the Crystal Empire popped up. Therefore, in Mente's eyes, she is disposable.
And, well, if Twilight removed herself from power and became a normal librarian there wouldn't be much of a story to tell in the way of politics, would there? Perhaps it's not perfect, but I'd like to say that I tried. Thank you for pointing that out though, I'd missed those points on the first run-through of the script.
OH don't get to high in your oligarchy I do believe that's how imperial China fell every single time, though with slightly different styles of course.
I'm enjoying the story so far, but I feel it's rather lacking in the funnies, puns and witticisms department. Still, this is no House of Cards; everyone's actually being rather reasonable and well-meaning.
I'm sorry this took so long, everyone. Exams only just recently ended, and also some life issues (not necessarily negative ones though) have kept me on my toes. Coupled with a general writer's block and lack of enthusiasm for writing, it took a while for me to get back to my fics. Also, apologies for any decrease in quality - I am just getting back on my feet, after all, so I may be a bit rusty. Please point anything out to me, and as usual constructive criticism is welcome!
EDIT: Also, a change in how chapters are going to be put out and organised: They will come out day by day as per normal, but after a "chapter" (story chapter, not FIMFic chapter) is done, all the separate days will be lumped into one for neatness' sake.
Fancypants just gave her the best advice she'll ever hear in her two years of rule.
Best listen to him, Twilight. He knows the deal.
I am intrigued by all this intrigue. Continue!
Again, everyone, sorry for the delay. I don't have much in the way of an excuse this time, just laziness. But at least it's done now. Hopefully the next one will be a little faster.
I believe the government should compensate its employees very well, but I'm getting the impression this goes a bit beyond "well compensated." Kind of funny; in the US the problem is abusing the position for compensation from external entities, while pay itself is generally at least the right order of magnitude.
What's a hundred thousand bits translate to on Earth, I wonder?
*Grins* Good ideas.
I wonder if Twilight will actually be able to find their W-2s. I doubt it. Paper can be 'misfiled' and such. It's a maze! A maze of paperwork.
Can't find something? Well that's not a bug, it's a feature.
Ah, would I take it that the Official Documents Archive is the equivalent of the Vehicle Licensing Centre in Swansea?
Oh for the love of... Twilight put some Tywin & Tyrion into your spine ASAP!
5401262 Given that this is Twilight, I'm not sure that's the right card to play. Do you want your notional job suddenly and brutally usurped by the reigning monarch spending a few hours (or days or weeks or months) magically sorting everything into staggering efficiency?
Twilight: Ah, Minion. I mean Mente. So good to see you today. I have a different question that I need to have answered.
Mente: And that is?
Twilight: I would like to know how much you were paid last year, and the year before that. You see, I'm trying to calculate what a proper princess compensation should be, and I keep running into some rather odd numbers. For example, Princess Celestia only is paid one bit a year, and maintains her private funds from a number of trusts. Princess Luna has a rather substantual investment income also, but has maintained her salary at the level which it was when she was banished to the moon, which combined with accumulated compounded interest, has netted her an immense sum. And Princess Cadence is paid out of the Crystal Empire, so that doesn't help at all. So I'm going to all of my upper level management to compare what they make, so that I don't ask for anything silly like less than their salary, or some unreasonably high number. So just take this index card, write your name on it, and the amount that the Equestrian Crown has paid you for the last two years, and return it to me by tomorrow morning, if you please.
Wow, that's a lot of comments. I'm impressed. Did something happen overnight while I was asleep? Anyways, I'll try to answer them - or at least those that I think need answers, that the present moment - to the best of my abilities.
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Well, a bit is about a dollar in Earth terms, so a hundred thousand bits would be a hundred thousand dollars.
I think that's a lot, based on the limited research I did; however, I live in Singapore, where the Ministers are paid upwards of a million dollars a year, so I'm not the most objective comparison, methinks.
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I'm sure Mente would be happy to have the Princess away so he, as High Councillor, could take all the decisions in her stead...
5401331
Exactly.
5402278
Mente: I'm so sorry, Princess, but all my money is in the National Bank of Nonya. It is difficult to get a balance.
Twilight: Nonya?
Mente: Yes. As in Nonya business.
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It's decent pay, but most high level positions in the US government are in the 100k range or above plus benefits. Remember it's often people with law degrees that run the government, and people with law degrees make ludicrous amounts of money if they're successful. Theoretically the high pay for congresspersons is to ensure that no one is denied the possibility of participating in the government due to financial constraints, though in practice they're probably all millionaires before they run for office.
It felt a little odd that his base salary being 100k wasn't something he wanted to reveal. Was it supposed to seem too much, or is the problem that the parts he isn't revealing are insanely big? The idea of the corruption being in the form of too much pay for the ministers is somewhat funny to me as a US citizen; we're much, much more advanced at making the corruption difficult to trace.
And... another new chapter, very late as usual. Inspiration just doesn't seem to come all that often these days. Sorry guys.
is it wrong that I want to kill and torture Mente in incredibly gruesome ways?
5531521 Corrupsion is what it is. A big pile of lies.
5531521 No. Mainly because I want to do the same thing.
What he doesn't seem to realize is that Twilight's going to figure this out eventually, and then he'd gonna be in so much trouble.
5531544 Very true.
5532085 Well from the sounds of the Editors notes at the start of the story he won't be able to take the pressure in the end it seems...
I know this is late, but I just found this story.
Majesty is a term used to refer to Kings, Queens, Emperors, and Empresses. The proper term for a Prince or Princess is 'Highness'.
Does Equestria not have taxes? She should just ask what he puts on his tax forms.
5532126 Let's hope that that is the case.
After all, Twilight can be quite the persistent little mare when she wants to be.
Twilight, you fool! Don't listen to them! It's all a house of corruption built on a hill of lies!
5532153
Is that the case? Thanks for the info, I didn't know the proper application for the terminology. I'll fix it at once.
They are pulling wool over eyes so thick she will need a nuke to see out of it. And she will eventually notice and then things will go down!