- Member Since 11th Dec, 2012
- offline last seen March 27th
ADRNEL
Just a simple university student from Michigan.
ADRNEL
Joined 11th Dec, 2012 ·
Offline
Sequels1
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ADRNEL · 51k words · 20 13 · 428 views
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Quite an interesting tale, can't wait to see what happens next
Oh now I wouldn't say that...
write more please
Why do you update so fast?
3393681
Don't want to keep my readers waiting TOO long.
I write like 5 or so chapters in the weekend, then upload them all throughout the week.
What's with the "†" at the end of this chapter title?
3394911
It symbolizes that the chapter contains clop.
Hey, I just want to say what a good job that you are doing so far. Hopefully, you are planning on redeeming Sombra as well? That seems to be the trend now. I am working on one right now called Wendigo May Cry. I hope you can come by and check it out.
Just how many chapters long is this story going to be for?
3426500
At LEAST 26. Maybe more depending on the plot points.
Not bad so far...but the story seems to be going by fast, not to mention the scenes seem choppy at times.
3429914
Going by fast?
To me it is going slow.
3429973 Hmm, I guess it just that each chapter seems to be on the short side. I do hope that despite the 'Dark' and 'Sad' tags, this story will end good.
3429985
Don't worry...the chapters should get longer as the story develops. But I can't guarrentee a good or bad ending.
Noooooo, you shouldn't have written the last two paragraphs. you should have written, "The moment twilight turned around, his eyes shimmered green" and it would have been fine. Now I know too much.
aha! killthehydra.com/wp-content/uploads/doctor-who-see-what-you-did-there1.jpg
Somehow, I feel this is gonna blow up in Twilight's face...I know it. I surely hope that Kage and Sombra are two completely different stallions in mind and Kage can break free of Sombra's grasp.
3488068
Blow up?
How so?
And....spoilers.
3488325
Well...
SPOILER ALERT
Sombra managed to control Trixie and got Cadance kicked off the throne...all because Kage...did it with her...it would go without saying that he will be able to control Twilight. Hopefully, Kage can be able to defeat Sombra.
Kage and Sombra I believe are two different stallions, right?
3488414
More like two sides of the same coin.
3488440 Still...I sense a fight between the 'two sides of a coin' soon?
Last sentence, I think you meant 'Just as I planned it to go'.
Man, Nightmare Moon? You are really trying to screw Equestria over, aren't you? And Sombra in this fic reminds me of Dante of Devil May Cry for some reason, with the sexual innuendos and the cocky ass attitude...I don't want to like him, as he is an asshole...but you gotta admit, he is awesome!
So, is Kage seriously perma-dead? Cuz that seems kinda dickish.
Just wanted to say that this story will be 26 chapters long with 4 prequel chapters.
But there MIGHT be another 26 chapters added to this story depending on demand and ratings.
Young Sombra was like I'm dead anyway fuck it!! And drinks the potion. He is just so evil I love it.
3662024
Repeat that sentence again. Don't understand what you're saying.
3662052 that sombra has her but need to take good care of her.
P.s. I'm writing on i pad
Oh dear...why is it that the bad guy is always winning throughout the entire story? And in more ways than one no less. Damn, Sombra must have some form of super swag to make Twilight give him the Element just so she can mounted by him. However, I am not getting the naming scheme of your chapters.
I sure hope that Kage can stop Sombra. He's the only stallion who is aware of what is going on.
Can twilight like. I don't know. Stop sombra from becoming evil and stuff. Free Luna. Etc. Cuz that'd be cool
3662340
SuperSwag.
Seems Legit.
You promised me sex.
What I got were story words on a screen.
I'll keep reading.
Also, have a like.
You promised me sex.
What I got were story words on a screen.
I'll keep reading.
Also, have a like.
Sex.
Now, I shall continue.
Very much continue.
Needs to be longer. It has the moments, but you made it a bit short.
Hey.
I'm reading.
This is to ding your notifications.
It's me again.
You know what I need.
Sombra is Kage.
Twilight no princess.
Cadence is pregnant.
Word.
3426527
Such downvote.
I'll helps.
Well, I don't feel like giving constructive criticism yet.
Much continue.
Very to.
So be.
Deluxe is now here for a full fledged review. Now, I'll be brutally honest here, okay?
I can see the structure of the story, but I feel that there's many holes in it. There's mistakes of grammar and spelling. Also, you switch from present to the past and vice versa. Kind of becomes a hassle.
Other than that, I like this. A lot.
Have a favorite.
Lol
Okay, this is bad. Is everything going downhill from here?
update
3975330
I know I haven't updated, but university has been really tough on me, but lucky I should have a new chapter up by the end of this month.
sorry...
Yay, the annoying guy died!
and
Honestly, I'm finding this end fairly mediocre compared to the rest. It felt to me like it all just came out of nowhere.