Everything started out normally. Spike was away on business, Twilight and her friends were having a sleepover, Ponyville was quiet. Nothing to worry about.
Until a stranger shows up at the door and boy does he have a tale to tell
A Sparity Fanfiction
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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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he has a tale to tell
he have a tale to tell.
Awesome story, and I love how Rarity was true and honest with Spike. Not wanting to date him right now, because he is too young, but to remain close friends with him was sweet.
OMGosh
This... I love this story 
So is this tale a "Wait for me" tale for Sparity fans or what ?
Other than that, it was an interesting story, even if it did get confusing at the end by Rarity's blunt honesty.
Yeah.... sorry. But it started to drag on significantly, and with the drake/dragon thing, my suspension of disbelief was broken.
... I don't know what to say and I probably will sound quite critical in this comment. I liked the concept. I liked Starswirl's appearance and the explanation of the bond...
I can't feel anything.
But the way the story was executed made it very boring and pointless, undermining the possible emotional problems of said bond and the applications of it. Spike seemed too mature and used to talking to Rarity when he would generally clam up for one thing. The sleepover... well setting the scene was necessary but Starswirl's sudden entrance was out of the blue, no hint given...the bond mechanics... They worked out well, but its so... convenient it makes no sense. It not like something you would say YES that TOTALLY makes sense, I mean Spike bonding to Rarity, it just doesn't well work. Well I'll take that back a step, the bond mechanics do make some sense (nice example with the Rarity calming Spike down), but its still FAR too convenient that Spike just BONDED to Rarity, thus the bonding mechanics seem forced. Moreover, you resolved the entire thing too quickly and the resolution was also forced... I mean Spike was not shocked, Rarity recovered in a heartbeat... Shipping stories are generally made of several parts. 1, the falling in love. 2 the confirmation of falling in love (which is not as applicable here so don't worry about that) 3. the problems that come with said love, which do not exist in this story because it was resolved so fast and thus that is a problem. I can see you're not exactly a very experienced writer so yeah mistakes can be made, but you need to work hard on your writing style and execution because while the overall concept is sound, I just found the story very boring. Touching sometimes, but boring and sortof convenient and forced. I wanted to feel for Rarity and Spike... but they weren't in any real distress so
I enjoyed this immensely. Good job.
2658489 Yes! Someone who said what I was thinking for me!
2659147 One more thing. Everything in this story has been literally overturned by the Spike Applejack episode... can't remember what that was.
As I was reading this, something about the whole structure just felt off.
I think the core of the problem is, you have two stories here and failed to flesh either one out.
One story is the sudden appearance and very 'Mary Sue'ish nature of this somewhat alien Star Swirl.
There is a lot of possible play with this character, but frankly you didn't do anything with him/her everything she added to the story could have been provided just as easily by Twilight finding a new book on dragons. Star Swirl was just a 'voice of authority' about dragons, Everything else she did added no conflict or resolution. Yet I sense you really feel something in your head canon about this female Star Swirl, you need to find a plot for her to get involved with.
The other story is the Spike/Rarity pairing, but other than casual, conflict free conversation, where was the 'action' or 'story' to go along with this. You need to take Spike and Rarity on some sort of adventure together, and let there connection come out as a plot point.
By trying to tie these two barely connected stories, I think you weaked both.
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Thank you for your compliments
2658489>>2668595>>2658461
Thank you for your constructive criticism, I shall aspire to improve my writing skills
2703412
Not exactly constructive from me.
2703412 As long as you know. Anyhow good luck with your future writing.
please make a sequel to your fanfic, Ties that bind.
Cute little story, but it needs editing. I noticed a lot of errors.