Humans... humans are such a bizarre race. Capable of the greatest benevolence and the worst atrocities. And yet, they're so very predictable. For you see, while societies may die, and nations may crumble, one thing will remain constant: the desire to survive.

I should know. I was there when everything fell.

Every night, in a little stable just outside of town, an old mare lays down to sleep. And every night she has the same dream of rainbows and open sky...

(READ ALL OF THIS) You have been given the Human's Guide to Life if Equestria. By some odd series of events you have come to this wonderful land of talking ponies. But a lot of you can't just jump into it without a little knowledge of your new home. Also you haven't been given this book, more like you have been forced to read every last word by Princess Celestia herself. But this is not a normal guide, no. This is a story, a story about you! In this we will cover, love and mating, your new self, settlement and careers, and many more things. So don't panic, because OMG THIS IS NOT HAPPENING.

(Please I hold nothing against humanity, or HiE stories, I love each and every one of them. In fact I'm giving them each a big shoutout for inspiring me. This is my second fanfic, and I just did it for the pure enjoyment of writing. It is roughly based off the Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy. I will update occasionally and I will finish it.)

(Rated Teen for: Some sexual references, crude humor, and mild goofiness, and a teeny tiny bit of swearing. And fourth wall breaking. )

And this also a Guide, not a Manual.

Twilight's slight miscalculation with the Elements of Harmony land her and Rarity in a telepathic funk. But when Princess Celestia goes missing, it looks like having a window into each other's minds is going to be the least of their problems. The Mane Six will find themselves everywhere from Equestria's capital, to the home of the sea ponies, to a battle on the ocean for the fate of the world - all in this long adventure with more innuendo than you can shake your plot at. (Comments are appreciated! Finally done!)