By sheer dumb luck, you learned about an upcoming invasion of Ponyville planned by Queen Chrysalis and her army of changelings. Unfortunately, there are two major problems. First, Twilight and her friends are currently on vacation, meaning that the only thing standing between the changelings and Ponyville is little old you. Second, the invasion is supposed to occur at sunrise, which is about an hour away.

Oh dear.

Anonymous, asshole extraordinaire and a rotten egg by all accounts, has fallen on good times after being made a commander of the Storm King's vast armies. With the King's forces and equipment at his fingers, he's found great success conquering nations, sowing chaos, and kicking the asses of all walks of life. All while having a rip-roaring great time doing it.
But the day of the Storm King's biggest conquest to date - the nation of Equestria - looms just around the corner. All that's left now is the final few preparations for the invasion: loose ends to tie up, new weapons to seize, and even some co-commanders to annoy to no end. And once those are complete, Anon will be the first in line to take Equestria as his next conquest.
God help us all.

This isn't the first horse story I've written, but it is the first one that is prose instead of greentext. And I'm still a bit rusty on top of all that. Any and all feedback is greatly appreciated!

TTS Reading of the entire fiction: Courtesy of the FanFiction Reader on Youtube.

Character List: Courtesy of TruthHut (A work in progress)

Handy is not a happy man at the best of times.

He was even less happy to find himself in an alien world that offended the very laws of physics and got injured for his own stubborn refusal to accept the obvious path fate had apparently laid out for him.

For his trouble he is now on a journey, with the long term goal of finding his way back home, only to find himself involved in plots and machinations so far above his head and cares that he quickly becomes a pawn in a game played by powers who care not for his well-being.

Quite like his life back on Earth if you think about it.

Needless to say, Handy does not care for any of it. He is much more preoccupied with the more immediate and pressing mundane concerns of day to day life a human needs to worry about while in Equestria.

Obtaining a new pair of shoes for example.

All this and one almighty hangover, what's the worst that could happen?

Rated teen for harsh language and minor violence

Proofread by JBL, Jude and Usurper

This story is a sequel to Ponies, Pirates and Peculiar Psychopaths

Chrysalis has been driven out of Canterlot, her invasion defeated. However, an old friend from her time before becoming queen is more than happy to help her succeed with her plans.

Will these two achieve their goals, conquering pony-kind and ruling over them with iron fist and hoof? Or will they be stopped in time, preserving the peace that Equestrian has known for as long as can be remembered? There is more than just dreams of world domination at work, though, this is personal for Chrysalis and her rediscovered assistance.

Hopefully, the line that 'Evil never triumphs' will prove to be correct, or else a drastic change is going to descend upon not just Equestria, but the entire world.

Thanks to Avatar of Madness for the coverart.

This story is a sequel to Nigel M Chalmers, Emperor

(15/10/2015) Turned status back to incomplete pending an Epilouge and Alternate Endings chapter as per comment suggestions.

After being banished by Celestia for his misdeeds, the alien Emperor of the Crystal Empire is back... and out for revenge.

Emperor Chalmers is not a happy space man. After being stabbed in the back by Equestria, he was sent to the depths of the Underworld. Kicked out for causing too much trouble for the wardens, Nigel now has the chance to take back his empire and show Celestia just how disappointed he is with her.

This time things will be different. This time he has friends.