When Princess Celestia sends her prized pupil, Sunset Shimmer to Ponyville to help organize the Summer Sun Celebration instead of reading about the return of Nightmare Moon, Sunset is tasked with making sure the preparations go well and more importantly, make a friend.
Sunset doesn't really care about friends though, finding herself dealing with an overly enthusiastic Royal Guard Cadet, a horse shoemaker pony, a mailmare, a magician and a flower pony.
May Celestia have mercy on her soul.
Ok I think I'm gonna enjoy this there are a few small spelling errors but it's a great start.
Hehe... sure...
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Yeah. In truth, it's an equal mix of BOTH. Yes, preparing for the worst can help, but so will having reliable back-up that you can trust with your life and who can trust you with their lives. But Sunset doesn't know that yet.
Hey there. Thanks very much for getting this story started. So far, this looks like a good effort on the exchanges, characterizations and future chapter set-up. I'm guessing that, in this universe, Twilight was either never born (or, at least, won't be for several centuries) or just hasn't been discovered by Celestia. REALLY appreciated Sunset making the effort to talk to Celestia, even if Celestia is lying her flank off right now. As well as Sunset's reactions to her first encounters with Silverspeed (good use of an OC older sister for Silver Spoon) and Pinkie (with the former having a bit more experience with the latter and with Ponyville in general than Sunset)
Most assuredly looking forward to more of this story. I am ESPECIALLY looking forward to seeing Sunset's first meetings with the other Element Bearers.
Obviously, Sunset is going to be Magic, but I am definitely curious as to the other Elements (though I know that Trixie and Muffins are both equally likely candidates for the Element of Laughter).
very nice!
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She went to the party instead
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Silverspeed is also actually Canon in the show. She was in Hurricane Fluttershy https://mlp.fandom.com/wiki/Silverspeed
Huh looks looks like twilight still caused pinkie mark if that still happened wonder who the new main six going to be I could guess 5 but still. Keep up the great work👍👍👍👍👍👍.
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Thanks very much for the corrections. Serves me right for reading too fast. (embarrassed grin)
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Anytime. Silverspeed is unfortunately very underused, especially with how similar she and Silver Spoon look
nice idea about silver. hmm....i wonder if she likes a challenge in terms of her arrow skills
Excellent work on the dialogue, characterizations and future chapter set-up once again. Definitely liked Sunset's reaction to one of the names on the list as well as the understandable frustration from Silverspeed's description of Rainbow (though I DID absolutely love Sunset figuratively (and possibly literally as well) lighting a fire under Rainbow's behind. The first meeting with Muffins was well done too, as well as finding out Sugarcube Corner is where Pinkie lives and works. And, judging from the character description in the author's notes, I would say that Silverspeed is a pretty good candidate for the Element of Loyalty.
VERY much looking forward to more of this.
Ok this chapter was way better than the first one, I wonder if Silver speed will become an element barrier or if Sunset will still become the element of empathy, if so I wonder who magic will be, I wouldn't be surprised if Twilight became Sunset's arch enemy slash rival and tries to create an anti element of harmony group somehow.
Does Sunset have parents in this continuity or is Celestia all she has?
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Judging by the story description and Silverspeed's file in the Author's Notes, I would say she does indeed become an Element Bearer. As for Twilight, given her appearance attending and enjoying the party, I would say Twilight would, at worst, be a FRIENDLY rival to Sunset later on (after Sunset finally learns a bit more about friendship and Sunset develops a bit more respect for her) - closer in tone to Applejack and Rainbow Dash in canon (though hopefully better at keeping the rivalry friendly).
And I'm pretty sure Sunset is going to be Magic in this universe.
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I think it was mentioned the Sunset was an orphan in the first chapter of this (though I admit that I could be wrong) - which would make Celestia the closest thing Sunset has to family (which is probably one of the reasons she dislikes Twilight other than Twilight being one of the few other students at the school who is nearly as good as her - Twilight actually HAS still living parents AND two brothers (one biological, one adopted).
i like roseluck the most out of the flower ponies. and nicely done, who could hate such a kind foal as Dinky?
Lily is going to be a problem I can tell hopefully she opens up a little when her sister becomes friends with Sunset.
Another well done job on the dialogue, characterizations and future chapter set-up. REALLY appreciated the show of Sunset's first meeting with the Flower Sisters before the chat at the bar (discussing such things as the encounter with Rainbow, Lyra having issues with Sunset because Sunset has issues with Twilight and the introduction to Shoeshine) and then Lilly getting briefly distracted on her way home by the stars' movements. Also liked the character files on the Flower Sisters - and it sounds like, based on both the interactions and on the file, Roseluck is going to be either Kindness or Generosity (much like either Trixie or Muffins is probably going to be Laughter).
And, on a completely unrelated note, I'm going to guess that this universe's version of Boast Busters is going to have Twilight coming for a visit with a mobile library (correctly reasoning that there are books for ALL different tastes and she, of course, has a love for gaining and sharing knowledge) with Sunset learning to work through at least a few of her frustrations concerning Twilight. Of course, I freely admit that I could be wrong. And that's going to be a fair amount of time away anyway.
But at any rate, I am really looking forward to more of this.
Classic about the Coffee
She was really not looking forward to working with Rarity again today. The only the thing to two had in common really was they both had a good eye for detail, Rarity with fashion and Shoeshine with horse shoes.
A few gramer issues here and there but a very good chapter all the same I look forward to seeing more.
Hello there. Thanks again for getting the next chapter up. REALLY liked the work going into the exchanges, characterizations and future chapter set-up. Yeah, the stuff with Shoeshine helping out Rarity and the dialogue with Carrot Top was good stuff and I also liked Shoeshine ripping into Sunset for the attitude toward both her and Rarity when BOTH were working their flanks off. Judging by this chapter and some of the stuff in the author's notes files, I would say that Shoeshine is probably going to be Honesty, though I admit that I could be wrong.
Anyway, really looking forward to more of this.
Wait... why is Mr. Cake Shoeshine's enemy? Lol
Nicely done, though poor raindrops
Excellent job on the dialogue, characterizations and future chapter set-up once again. REALLY got some good laughs out of Trixie and Raindrops's banter as the former was testing her latest trick on the latter and, of course, afterwards. Sunset's chat with Trixie shortly afterwards was also enjoyable. And, yeah, the work on Trixie's author's notes files was well done too. I would say Trixie is probably going to end up being Laughter.
So, the Elements to my knowledge are going to be:
Sunset: Magic
Silverspeed: Loyalty
Roseluck: Either Kindness or Generosity
Shoeshine: Honesty
Trixie: Laughter
and Muffins: Either Kindness or Generosity (depending on which one Roseluck gets)
Though I'll admit that I could be wrong.
And I'm pretty sure we'll be able to eventually add Starlight Glimmer to Trixie's list of both Allies and (former) Enemies, but that's more than two years down the road in universe.
I'm going to guess that Muffins/Derpy is going to be the next author's notes files and Sunset herself sometime after that (either when Nightmare Moon returns or for the last chapter of the story. And Nightmare Moon (being the main villain) is probably going to get a file before the story is over (with the possibility of a revised one after she's Luna again) and Celestia herself will also get their own author's note files before the story is over. Though I definitely admit that I could be wrong.
But, at any rate, I am really going to be looking forward to more of this.
LOVE THIS CHAPTER
Cute dinky and derpy got me laughing here. Her motto though, painfully thuth
Absolutely loved this chapter. Again, the dialogue, characterizations and future chapter set-up are wonderfully done. REALLY liked Sunset and Silverspeed's interactions as well as Silver Spoon catching on to Sunset gradually coming to see Silverspeed more and more as a friend (even if Sunset still has trouble admitting it right now). The stuff with Muffins and her family was superb as well, in addition to Sunset getting frustrated about getting punished for using bad language in front of Dinky. Once again, the work on the character file for Muffins/Derpy is excellent (though I'm pretty sure Fluttershy would probably also count on that list of friendliest ponies in Ponyville if she weren't so, well, shy). At any rate, I'm going to go out on a limb and guess that Derpy/Muffins is likely going to be Kindness.
Which would make the Elements:
Sunset: Magic
Silverspeed: Loyalty
Roseluck: Generosity
Shoeshine: Honesty
Trixie: Laughter
and Derpy/Muffins: Kindness.
At any rate, very much looking forward to more of this.
Nice work, though the star wars reference scared me a bit
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Happy someone got it lol
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Star wars Fan with passion
Sunset has/will have a LOT of former enemies, lol.
Interesting
Sunset is Magic
Shoeshine seems to be BRUTAL Honesty,
and Derpy seems to be Kindness.
That leaves Trixie, Roseluck, and Silverspeed, but I have a feeling Silver will be loyalty. No offense to Trixie, but Roseluck is probably Generosoty, leaving Laughter for the showmare.
REALLY good work on the dialogue, characterizations and future chapter set-up. REALLY appreciated Sunset's brief dialogue with Celestia before Nightmare Moon officially returned as well as Celestia's brief chat with Nightmare Moon. And Nightmare Moon upped the stakes by kidnapping the family and friends of Sunset's future fellow Element Bearers? Makes a lot of sense. And it looks like we finally have Sunset's file up in the author's notes.
And, on to the next chapter.
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Indeed. There's going to be Discord, Chrysalis, Sombra, Tirek, the Dazzlings, Starlight Glimmer, the Pony of Shadows, the Storm King, Tempest Shadow, Cozy Glow and POSSIBLY (the real) Grogar - and THAT's just the MAJOR bad guys. But that's YEARS down the road.
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That's what I'M thinking too. And I don't think Trixie is going to take offense concerning the Laughter part.
Again, really good job on the dialogue, characterizations, action and future chapter set-up. That stuff about Derpy and Roseluck, whoa. Yeah, I could see where Derpy would get upset about that - even refusing to accept Roseluck's numerous attempts to apologize. Glad to see Shoeshine helping them work through that for the time being to focus on the much larger problem. And that stuff with the Cragodile was rather well done.
VERY MUCH looking forward to more of this.
interesting backstory for sunset, and silverspeed, you got me that thought again
Well then... that's different...
Deer are Related to Caribou.... is this a Fall of Equestria Fic?
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Wth is that
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Trust me - you DON'T want to know. Long story short - it involves a bunch of Caribou, massive nerfing of pretty much ALL the canon characters and an uncomfortably large amount of rape and slavery. That should be JUST enough info for you to want to justifiably avoid that series like the plague.
Not much I can say other than really good job on the dialogue, characterizations and future chapter set-up once again. REALLY liked the work going into the backstories for the characters (at least the parts that Sunset was willing to admit) and additional family information. That cliffhanger concerning the tranquilizer darts was also well done. REALLY looking forward to seeing how the gang gets out of that mess, as well as more of the story AND the series in general.
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Ew okay staying away from that then
All I can say is really good job on the dialogue, characterizations and future chapter set-up. REALLY appreciated Trixie doing a few jokes to calm the others (except for Silverspeed, who managed to escape as far as they know) when they found themselves in a jail cell. And, yes, I could see them worrying about that brief "trial show". And now, Sunset has explained a bit more about her life in Canterlot before making a brief semblance of an escape plan (which Muffins had understandable issues with). Hopefully, Silverspeed will get back in time to help the others (she very likely WILL, because this is just the first story in the series, but it's still understandably nerve-racking).
At any rate, very much looking forward to more of this.
interesting
Are the deer leaders going to be Five Faced by any chance? If so I saw this movie a good 40 years ago. Great reference, btw.
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I'm glad you like the reference lol