One Last Thing (Love Of My Life)

by applejackofalltrades

Gone For Good (Epilogue)

The seat was hard beneath Applejack’s rump.

Glad to see nothin’s changed.

She sighed and looked around, her front hoof reaching up to play with the necklace that had adorned her body for nearly a year. There were some new ponies, but a lot of the same old ones. She wondered if they were there because they were still sick, or because they liked to keep up. Regardless, she admired them for coming.

The room was full of chatter, inquiries about each other’s lives, updates, and progress. Friends from out of town who were happy to see each other, budding friendships, and ponies of all ages. She noticed a small group of younger ponies, each showing each other their prosthetic limbs with eager grins. Applejack couldn’t help but smile at that.

Finally, Nurse Redheart entered the room, and everypony who was out of their seat returned to it, facing the snow-white earth pony eagerly. Applejack shuffled uncomfortably in her seat as Redheart noticed her and shot her a reassuring smile. Applejack simply tipped her hat and tried to remain aloof, though she noticed some of the newer members eye her. Perhaps a few from Ponyville were even surprised to see her there. She had kept her medical life mostly secret, after all.

“Welcome, everypony, to this week’s group meeting,” Nurse Redheart started with that cheery tone. “I’m glad to see a few new faces, as well as some”—she glanced at Applejack proudly—“returning faces. It’s great to see everypony here looking cheerful and well! As a reminder, we have baked goods complimentary from Sugarcube Corner on that table, as well as drinks on the opposite side. Bathrooms are in the room in the back and anything else you may need, please let me know. We will take a short break once we get around half the circle today. Would anypony like to start?”

A stallion a few seats over from Applejack raised a hoof eagerly. She recognized him from right before she stopped coming to the meetings, though she couldn’t quite remember his name. Everypony’s eyes turned to him, and Redheart nodded encouragingly.

The stallion smiled and waved. “Hi, everypony! My name is Andante and I was diagnosed with osteosarcoma right on my hind leg. I started my treatment a long time ago, but I was recently confirmed to be cancer-free!” Everypony cheered for him. Andante squealed happily. “I know! I had surgery first, then a lot of magic radiation, and now I’m free of all that! I can actually get back to playing music! But I will keep coming to these because I know lots of ponies who need support. If any of you need somepony to talk to, I’m your stallion!”

Applejack clapped her hooves together. She was glad to see that Andante was doing good, and despite how much she hated the meetings, she picked up on that sense of… familiarity. Maybe they weren’t so bad after all.

“Wonderful, Andante,” Redheart cut in, giving Adante a big smile. “Now, let’s go in a circle. Remember, you don’t have to talk if you don’t want to, but it is encouraged that you do.”

The unicorn mare next to Andante shuffled her hooves. She was young, maybe even a bit younger than Applejack herself. Her short purple mane seemed frazzled, though maybe that was just her style. “Um, hi. I’m Raspberry Sorbet. I’m new here. Um, I was diagnosed last month with leukaemia, and I’m going to start my treatment next week.” She chuckled a bit. “I’m a little nervous, but my doctor recommended I come to one of these. I like it so far, you all seem nice. Mine was caught early, so I’m not too afraid, but,” she chuckled, “it’s just scary, y’know?”

Everypony greeted her and wished her good luck with her treatment. Applejack, of course, did the same, though she mostly looked down at her necklace.

The next few ponies came and went. She had seen the two of them before. One of them was like her and came back to visit, while the other one was a fresh face. Before Applejack knew it, everypony’s eyes were turned to her. She swallowed dryly at the realization that she was at the exact middle of the circle.

“Uh, howdy y’all,” she greeted nervously. It’d been a while since she’d had to do this. “The name’s Applejack. I actually haven’t been here in nearly two years.” She brought a hoof to her neck and rubbed it absent-mindedly. “Was diagnosed with, uh, subglottic cancer ‘round five years ago. I’ve been through all my treatments, clearly, though I haven’t been labeled as cancer-free just yet. Still waitin’ on that, so uh, guess what I’m tryna say is… don’t smoke.” She cleared the scratchiness away from her throat. “Y’know, my wife ‘n I actually started datin’ ‘cause-a these meetin’s,” she added with a weak smile. “They’re worth comin’ to.”

Everypony clapped, though a few of them offered her sad smiles. She had figured at least some of them would pick up on the truth. In return, she tipped her hat and turned to Redheart.

“Thank you for sharing, Applejack, and thank you for coming back. We are glad to see you here.” She paused, then clapped her hooves and smiled. “Now it is time for our break. You are welcome to all the food here. If you need assistance, do let me know.”

The room was instantly once again filled with chattering. Applejack cocked her head. These meetings had always felt so long before, but this one had felt really short so far. At least she could have something to eat; she had forgotten to have lunch before coming.

Carefully, Applejack hopped off her chair and made her way to the surprisingly uncrowded food table. There were only a few other ponies there, each one with a donut or a cupcake. Applejack smiled. Pinkie and the Cakes were always so kind for supplying the meetings with food.

As she approached the table, the ponies there turned to her and waved. She recognized Andante and Raspberry Sorbet from before, but there was another earth pony who Applejack hadn’t seen before. Applejack waved back and smiled.

Raspberry Sorbet was the first one to speak. “Hey, you’re Applejack, right?” After she asked the question, she cringed a bit. “Well, I mean, duh, you just… talked.”

Applejack chuckled as she picked out a plain donut. “Yeah, that’s me. Nice to meet ya.”

“You know, Andante was just telling me about how he remembers you from before,” Raspberry recalled. Andante next to her blushed and rubbed his neck, while the other earth pony snickered.

“Yeah, well, I just remembered you from when I got here, Applejack,” Andante mumbled sheepishly. “I’m glad that you’re doing well though!”

The other earth pony nodded. “Yeah, I think I’ve seen you around Ponyville before. I come here a lot for physio, and you seem to be pretty popular around here.” He cut himself off and laughed. “Oh, sorry, my name is Felix!”

Applejack tipped her hat. “Nice to meet ya, Felix. An’ I wouldn’t say I’m popular. If I’m bein’ honest, it’s just the farmin’, I think. Small town, everypony knows everypony or whatever.”

Andante scoffed. “Oh, come on, Applejack. I don’t know you very well, but I know ponies, and everypony knows you. And hey, now that I think about it, you were with that, uh, that other mare when I last saw you, weren’t you?”

Felix opened his mouth wide and nodded. “Oh yeah,” he exclaimed. “That yellow pegasus, right? Is she your wife?”

Applejack frowned and glanced at her necklace. The strawberry gem grew heavier with every passing moment. “Yeah,” she replied with a nod. “She is.”

Raspberry cleared her throat and gave Applejack a small smile before turning to the stallions. “Come on, guys, I think you’re upsetting her.”

The pair of stallions frowned. Felix looked away as Andante pawed at the ground. “Sorry,” they both muttered.

“It’s fine,” Applejack reassured them. She took a deep breath. “I don’t… I don’t mind talkin’ ‘bout it anymore. Strawberry an’ I became friends here an’ then we started datin’. When I had my first recurrence, Strawberry was there for me. An’ I was always there for her.” Applejack rubbed at her foreleg with a sad smile, unable to look at any of the ponies in the eye. “I was a bit luckier, I reckon. I’m better now but…” Her words caught in her throat. “But she’s gone.”

The three ponies looked at each other sadly. “I’m sorry,” Andante offered.

Applejack smiled. “It’s okay. I guess we both knew it was gonna happen before it did, y’know? I’m actually here ‘cause of her. Today’s the fifth year since we first went out. I thought I might finally come to check up on everypony.”

Felix nodded. “I’m sure she’d be happy you came back.”

Snorting, Applejack laughed. “Naw, she hated it here. I did too, though I think it’s only cause we saw it as somethin’ sad,” she admitted. “But I think today’s shown me that… Well, it don’t gotta be sad. I wish we’d seen it that way before.”

Andante offered her a warm smile. “Well, from what I remember, Strawberry was really… happy. So I think she’d be even happier that you found happiness in this place.”

“How many times are you gonna say happy in one sentence?” Raspberry teased. “But he’s right. And frankly, I’m glad you came, Applejack. It’s nice to see someone who’s doing so well. You made me less scared,” she admitted.

The group smiled at each other as they each took a coordinated bite of their baked confection. Applejack had hated being around other ponies like her before. They were reminders of things she’d rather forget but these ponies…

They only reminded her of everything she loved about Strawberry.

Felix prodded Applejack. “Nurse Redheart is calling us back. Are you going to come?”

Applejack glanced at her necklace, then at the all-too-familiar circle of chairs. She took a deep breath and nodded once. “Yeah, I reckon I am.”

Author's Note:

I’m not too sure how I feel about this story, but it was definitely an interesting one to write. Think I went a too The Fault In Our Stars with it (though tbh I don’t remember in extreme detail how that one ended).

Uh yeah but idk. I almost didn’t want to have this epilogue be part of the story, but I thought maybe AJ needed some closure. Anyway, I hope you enjoyed this one.

Comments

[Sunflowers]

Exalant new chatter 10 out of 10

Ps please check out my storys

[applejackofalltrades]

11052323
naw
plus you don’t even have stories

[iAmSiNnEr]

11052409
It's because all of their stories are M rated jay

[applejackofalltrades]

11052453
oh boo i usually have mature on i guess it turned itself off

[fanreader999999]

Mmm

[The Red Parade]

I gave you Strawberry Sunrise and this is what you do to me in return?

Illegal.

This was fucking heartbreaking man. Every line just pounds into your heart and by the end of the first chapter your heart is just in a million shattered pieces on the fucking floor. Then there's a second chapter that sweeps all those pieces up and then grinds them into dust. That's how hard this thing hit.

Wonderful stuff Jay, as always. Ow.

[applejackofalltrades]

11061328
Hahah omg sorry Red :P
You can’t give me nice characters and expect me not to do something to destroy them

I’m glad you. .. . enjoyed? were pained? by this story >:) it means I'm doing my job.

thanks for the nice comment :D and I'm sorry :P

[seventrials]

This is beautiful ly written, and absolutely heartwrenching. i know all to well the shattering grief that comes with a loss like this, having lost my father to lung cancer back near the end of last November. Seeing Aj reach closure like this gives me hope, silly as that might sound. It's a rough process for anyone, and for anyone else who might be going through similar, i wish you the best.

[applejackofalltrades]

11202236
Hey thanks for the comment! I’m really sorry to hear that about your father. It’s definitely something really tough to go through, and I hope you’re doing well now, or at least better. I’m glad the story gave you hope, and I don’t think it’s silly. Good things come out of all sorts of places, I’m glad my story was one of em :)

[Sunset Shimmer The Great]

I say this with as much love as possible: How dare you do this to me?! Hecc you to hecc and back! and you sent those damn onion ninjas with you! I already have a cold and you're making it worse.

Seriously though, this is fucking beautiful and heartbreaking at the same time. My paternal gramma, who I was never really close to, died from COVID. She wasted away in the ICU, much like Strawberry.

She was anti-vaxx but finally agreed to getting the vaccine. She got COVID around a week before she was supposed to get the jab. Then boom! Both grandparents went to the ICU and she died the day she got the shot. The cherry on top is that they had the freaking nerve to change her cause of death to heart faliure or some shit like that. This was during the Delta wave in India. We couldn't even go visit her because my parents would be risking their visa or something. We just had some religious first year of death function which I wasn't even allowed to go to because it was that time of the month. Stupid outdated beliefs.

Grief is complex. Some don't feel anything, like me. Others bury themselves in work. Others can't get the energy to do anything.

Seeing the proposal scene, and then Strawberry dying right after, shattered my heart. Then, you had the audacity to crush those little pieces in the epilogue. This is obviously symbolic and/or metaphorical, because I would be dead if it wasn't.

Cancer's a bitch. One of my cousin's friend's mom had cancer (which was in remmision) and caught COVID, killing her. Her father also died from COVID right after. The friend had just turned 18.

My uncle died from cardiovascular disease 6 years before I was born. They found cancer after, or something like that, I don't know the details.

Cancer affects so many people in so many different ways. Some survive, some don't.

I'm gonna end this with some resources.

Cancer Organizations

[applejackofalltrades]

11279943
Aw hell, I’m really sorry to hear that. That’s awful. It really was just a matter of bad timing I reckon. You’re right though, grief is a pretty complex thing.

And even more so complex is cancer. Sorry that you and people you know have been affected by it so much. Thanks for sharing these resources.