• Member Since 6th Dec, 2019
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Switch Swap

Nyx is best Alicorn OC


This story is a sequel to Detective Nyx: Origins

When Rainbow Dash goes missing around the same time a temple appeared in the Everfree, it's up to Detective Nyx to bring her back.

If you haven’t read Detective Nyx: Origins yet, read that first

Chapters (4)
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Comments ( 84 )

What!? Rainbow had been kidnapped?! Okay awesome story. 100000/10

You'll see if she was actually kidnapped or not later on

Great beginning to the story

Thanks. What do you like most about it so far?
I'm going to work on the second chapter today soon

Mmh... This promises to be a little more complex than the first story.

What do you like most about it?

The fact that it doesn't seem to be a simple kidnapping like in the first story.

That's what I was hoping for people to think

Great and looking not a kidnapping more like rainbow dash adventure

Note: This story is missing the "This story is a sequel to..." text at the top. Just a reminder.

What do you think about it so far?

Ooh... I'm scared for RD here. The Everfree forest is what it is already, now the possibility that she was kidnapped into there... :pinkiesad2: Please save her, Nyx...

Just wait until you read the next chapter
It's going to get even stranger

Even stranger? Well then, I'll go ahead and read it.

Hope Nyx and Scoots finds the spell they need to bring Dash's memories ASAP.

You're right; this chapter had my mouth hanging open too. This Ancient Temple and what's happening to RD are really cool ideas!

I can tell that people are really going to like this series. And because of that, I'm not going to end it

It's a great series!

Are you going to join the group now?

Yes, in fact, I was about to ask you to send me a link; I haven't been able to find the group. Can you link me to it?

What do you like most about this chapter?

I think the fact that Rainbow is still nice. Whatever exactly happened, at least she didn't pick up the attitude of Everfree creatures.

You'll find out what happens in future chapters
Then I'm going to start working on the third story either Monday or Tuesday

OMG Dash lost her memory!? This is... Kinda awesome. And she's living at peace with the animals of the Everfree Forest!? Also... Kinda cool. I NEED MORE!!! Por favor?

2 chapters at least


Comment posted by Switch Swap deleted November 22nd
Comment posted by Highnose57 deleted November 22nd
Comment posted by Switch Swap deleted November 22nd

before reading it i will guess LIghtning Dust has something to do with it

Insta gave before even reading I know it’s gonna be good

"Celestia, my Princess. Hear my wish. I wish for strength, speed and agility." Said Nyx. She then felt a magic energy flow through her, increasing her speed, strength, and agility to 150 times the normal level.

Well heck. She got powers by wishing on Celestia. Overall this was a very adventurous chapter. Watcher is very interesting.

This is an alternate universe after all

Retrieve an ancient relic: Check!
Make a new ally in the process: Check!
Go save Rainbow Dash: Soon.

The difficulty of Nyx's job is certainly rising in this story, and she's doing it very well. She's one brave filly!

Constructive criticism I'll offer: I think the part where Nyx climbed the mountain could have been longer. This story's speed, to me, felt like it suddenly went up in the middle, then dropped back down to beginning levels towards the end. Description of Nyx's emotions as she triggers the avalanche and the changing physical nature of the mountain, such as a smoother part followed by a harder part, I think would have helped this chapter.

That's just me though. Overall, great work.

Nyx can teleport here? You're making her like Twilight level here, she wasnt able to do that in Past Sins until she was turned into Nightmare Moon I think. Did you have her keep the magic knowledge in this au?

I was kinda running low on ideas at this point, and that was with music

Ah, okay. I understand.

What do you think about this chapter?

It's a great display of the first two things I was talking about earlier; the rising strenuousness of Nyx's detective job and her endurance through it. Also, the magic used, with the crystals and everything, that's brilliant. Then the mysterious character who knows about Equestrian lives; dang!

Overall, it's an awesome chapter!

You mean Watcher?
Also, don't you think that Watcher is a good name for somecreature that knows everything about everycreature else?

Oh yeah, I suddenly forgot the name somehow.

I agree; it is a very fitting name!

Great chapter as always

What do you like most about it?

And here's the end. Great story, buddy.

I'd like to see more of Watcher in the future. Maybe a backstory for him?

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