• Member Since 22nd Dec, 2017
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Comments ( 18 )

Oh boy, more Twincest with the Cakes.

You seem to like this ship I've noticed.

It is the best ship.

:twilightsheepish: Pumpkin is one of the best horses.

Twicest? nice, oral? super, vaginal? magnificent, anal? I can work with this... wait... condom? ok I pass, this is disgusting...

Damn dirty safe sex!

Almost as bad as married sex

I wish they didn't have condoms!

I know, if he doesn't want to risk impregnating his sister (would rather he did) all he needs to do is just cream her ass.

Quarantine sex might trend?

Lovely fic slipsy! Deserves more views and attention, it's very well written, so impressed with how much your writing has grown!

Thanks! :twilightsmile: Great praise hearing it from you. Hope I can continue writing and improving. Also, Deus Foalt helped make this extra polished by providing some wonderful editing.

Very well written, if somewhat cliched story. but it feels like it's missing a little something that all the rest of your stories have.

That something is the Foalcon tag and it's not actually a complaint but an observation

Thanks for the complement, and I knoowww :fluttershysad: It would have had it, but it wouldn't have fit in this this story to shoehorn some foalcon in there. More to come in the future though :raritywink:

Condoms are kinda hot, shush

This is your official review from Dirty Little Secret's Dirty Little Contest!
Remember to vote in the contest's poll -- voting closes at midnight, June 6th.
And make sure to allow notifications from the contest group and/or follow Dirty Little Secret to get the full results and the awards show post on June 9th!

------ Review ------

Please keep in mind, I know I can be overly critical and negative at times. I can always find something to nitpick, even in the greatest works of literature ever written. Please don't take it personally!
-Impressive that the sex scene manages to go on for so long without getting tiresome.
-They really wore each other out!
-His smiled instantly turned nervous -- Pumpkin isn’t the only one getting a little extra ‘D’.
-Not sure that all the opening exposition and movie was totally necessary.
-Interesting that the condom use implies the existence of STDs in this world. That’s a place most clop authors don’t go to!

------ Scores ------

To clarify what these scores mean, check my judging rubric.
Cloppability: 93/100
Allure: 70/100
Enticement: 75/100
Immersion: 98/100
Prose Quality: 89/100
Total Score: 425/500
The more specialized scores for individual prizes, as well as the results of the community poll, will be published when the full results are announced. If this story wins any awards, there will be another post in the story comments sometime after June 9th announcing that this story has won.

Thank you for participating, and thank you for contributing to Fimfic's collection of clop!

Out of all the cakecest stories that I've read (or at least started on, and it's been simply too many by now) there's finally one that I actually like enough to fave.

Would you make a thunderlane and lightning dust shipping please? I really wanted a story of those two :scootangel:

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