• Member Since 20th Jun, 2019
  • offline last seen 11 hours ago

Three Tails


Aspiring novelist testing his characters in the MLP verse.

T

Shiva wasn't a freedom fighter or a revolutionary. She was just a normal wolf-dog, happily living her life as a beloved pet. Then, forces beyond her threw her into a strange new world with a strange new body.

With cruel talking ponies out to get her.

Alone, confused, and with a magic she doesn't understand as her only defense, Shiva must wage a one-wolf battle to escape a land apparently out to enslave her, all while the forces that protect this new nation do all they can to catch her.

How far will these ponies push the wolf? And how far is she willing to go to maintain her freedom in a world that seems desperate to make her a beaten and broken slave?

Inspired by Misunderstandings by The Rogue Wolf and Drawn with the Night by Dan_S Comments.

Both a character experiment involving my OC Shiva, and a plot experiment that borrows the plot beats from "The White Wolf," my (likely horrible) attempt at an upcoming original novel. Feedback is greatly appreciated.

Shout out to Ang Auronheart for the cover art.

Chapters (6)
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Comments ( 21 )

The fact that your MC is a OC of a new spiecies says enough already.

Twilight trying, and failing, to be abusive as a show for the guards. Nice character buildup.

10066861
Positively or negatively?

“Do you know who I am?” the unicorn finally asked.

The wolf shifted. “Twilight?” she asked.

How did the wolf knew?

Read the story, Gotta say it has potential, just not alot but still has potential

10073524
Twilight shows up near the end of Shiva's flashback story. Around Chapter 4.

Sorry to keep you waiting, but it will be explained how Shiva knows Twilight then.

This story has great potential but I am bit......iffy with how Luna is being portrayed here to be honest, I dont think she would refuse to see the truth in someones memories like that

10077770
Yeah, didn’t she wield Honesty against Discord?

Hello, and thank you both for your feedback and comments.

10077770
10078095
Yeah, that's what I was worried about. :fluttershyouch::ajsleepy:

The way I saw it, Luna wouldn't want to believe that her ponies were capable of such cruelty. Since the ponies are used to being the good guys, it'd be rather jarring to know that there were those out there capable of acts like this. Why will be explained later, but for now, Luna and Twilight have to deal with the fact that Shiva may not be as evil as they originally believed.

Do you think the story would work better if I toned down Luna's meltdown to stunned silence, or at the very least cut out her protests in the middle of Shiva's memories?

Please let me know; I want this story to live up to the potential you guys are seeing.

Thank you again for your feedback, and have a wonderful day.

10078249
With that light, it works well. I don’t think you should change anything, after seeing it from your point of view.

10078249
I think Luna being stunned silent would be much more beliavble to her charecter as her whole in my point of view, I understand she would not want to beleive her ponies could be like that but her reaction to me even then just seems a bit to farfetched

10078257
10078328

Thank you both again for your feedback and suggestions. I deeply appreciate you guys taking the time to let me know how I could make the story better. :twilightsmile:

I edited the story, cutting out Luna's temper tantrum and making her reaction hopefully more in-line with her canon characterization.

Thank you again for your feedback, and I hope the improved story works a little better.

Thanks again.

I read the story while listening to hardbass. Have to say it was very entertaining.

Also can't wait of how Shiva will act the next chapter

with a backstory like that its unlikly she will ever fully place her trust in luna, twilight and their afilliates

Time to bring in Celestia. She will show Luna that even Their little ponies can be the monsters we fear at night.

Pinkie Pie your element is about being able to cheer people up and help their morale, to do this also requires you be able to read other peoples moods. Wolf-woman wants left alone, Pinkie should respect demand for space and go slow with contact.
Also no just jumping into existence, IT SCARES PEOPLE.

Definitely curious to see more of this! :pinkiehappy:

Shiva shouldn’t be ashamed that she killed Beast Breaker. I mean, that sick bastard deserved that death.

10096729
Next chapter will be out by next friday.

Looking forward to sharing it, and really appreciate your feedback. :pinkiesmile:

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