• Member Since 9th Sep, 2017
  • offline last seen 6 hours ago

BradyBunch


You are going to LOVE ME!

Sequels1

E

This story is a sequel to Twilight's Spark


After breaking up with a mare you've loved for a long, long time, your mind is in shambles. You live life only from day to day, trying to clear your head by doing menial, solo tasks like helping out the Apples in their chores.

One day, however, you come to the close, caring friend called Rarity. And your direction may perhaps be changed for the better.

Chapters (1)
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Comments ( 12 )

Wow, Rarity sounds very, um... middle-class here. This one felt a bit rushed. "Oh, we're both kinda miserable, let's go on a date, byeeeee!"

I'm not being rude but you need to edit this story and put Quotation marks in, it confusing and don't know which characters is saying but although this story wasn't too bad, I love it but I really hope you put those Quotation marks in to not confused people who are reading this story.

9722017
Rarity is the only character speaking. This is basically an ASMR fic, where you just read and fill in the blanks yourself.

9722017
it's got the second person tag for a reason m8

Hillbe #5 · July 9th · · ·

:duck: the cure to a shattered heart? Two words, ICE CREAM!
:raritystarry: SPIKE! un-devour him this minute!
:moustache: I only chewed him a little bit...
:facehoof:

9722021
I know I should've asked this back at the RD one, buuuuut: What's "ASMR"?

9722261
Autonomous Sensory Meridian Response. It comes in many forms, but always involves relaxing audio sounds, like a thunderstorm, a crackling fire, a ticking clock, people talking indiscriminately in the background, or close whispers from a significant other reassuring you about your flaws. I tried to make it literary as an experiment. ASMR is often used to relax people to sleep, soothe their minds, or make goosebumps rise on their arms.

I once heard a joke ASMR of Thanos talking to you about his evil plans, but he just got on a lunch break with some tasty KFC, so in between Thanos's lines, he'd smack and crunch on chicken and slurp up soda. The only bad part was, it was only a minute long.

9722288
Ooooooh, okay. So, who's next on your list?

9722458
I'm working on an Applejack one rn. Once I get through the Mane Six, I'll do side characters.

This was a nice little read.

Although I must point out that the logic isn't strong in this one. Anon is devastated one moment and asks Rarity out the next. I can see her being okay with this, it's just that there is hardly any journey from one emotional state to the other.

This is really good! Rarity’s personality is definitely a little off, though, but it’s still a good story nonetheless. :twilightsmile:

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