- Member Since 18th Mar, 2019
- offline last seen Apr 7th, 2023
Dungeoneer
"Camaraderie! Adventure! And steel on steel! The stuff of legends, right Boo?" Minsc, Ranger, 1368 DR.
Dungeoneer
Joined 18th Mar, 2019 ·
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Chapter 1, liking it so far, there are some spelling errors here and there but nothing major, the character looks like a self-insert powerhouse(nothing against it just saying), but since im not knowledgeable on Stellaris or strategy games like that i cant tell if its stardard stuff or not, so far its a good fic.
9589156
Praeratus is not a self insert, he's more of a combination of Master Chief, Mal Reynolds and Kratos, and he IS a powerhouse... but only in Equus. Wait for the moment he'll have to face the psionic deathclaws themselves.
I like this so far. Nice character descriptions as a bonus to the well thought out plot.
9592794
Thanks! Hey, can I get a thumbs up from you?
This is really good. The story plot is great, and the internal character struggle was a awesome addition. As a plus, I saw no errors through the whole chapter. 👍🏾
9592832
Thanks!
More plz :)
If "the stare" works on him I am dropping this story. Listen here this is a well-written story but. If a primitive skill that isn't even documented, and is the most likely just a superposition of will, works on a war hardened veteran of over a thousand years of fighting.
If the absolute stupidity that is the stare works on him then I'm retarded.
Good Job on the chapter though. Its refreshing to se a well written story where the MC is not a kiss-ass
*Lazor of MOAR fires*
You keep writing Frash Freeze, i imagine you mean Flash Freeze, other than that its all good so far, still have to wrap my head around how stromg he is compared to the rest of the world, but thats just me.
9651675
Hmmm .... it might work on him for 3 seconds because she surprised him ... but like you said once his training kicks in I see him getting in her face and giving her his version of the stare. Almost hoping she flew into his face like the dragon just so he can grab her by the throat to deliver it ... which will get discord involved and get discord whooped.
9651803
It either works or it doesn't work. Frankly while I do like some weakness in an MC, this fella isn't a self-insert, he has flaws but he is the most powerful creature on that planet by a longshot and additionally ahs fought wars. Wars that most likely held untold horrors, if these bio-weapons are any indication.
The stare of a tiny, innocent pony creature shall do nothing to a hardened war veteran.
9651803
I do support this course of action. Partially.
9651775
Dammit I heard too much 'Tell Me Why'!
9651821
Finally someone realizes it!
Sapient nor sentient, why does everyone get this wrong? I partially blame Star Trek for this. Almost all animals are sentient. It's one of the reasons we are Homo-Sapiens not Homo-Sentience.
9589156
I do say sapient sometimes. The classification is a personal thing of Praeratus.
More :D
So I take it I'll need to know about the source material in order to understand this story?
9692451
Well, if you're talking about Stellaris then no, for the moment it's just Shepard/Chief/Fett interacting with the locals (especially Celly) and hunting the weapons. Later though, you better now what an ether drake is (yes, AN, not THE).
Is there human history in this story?
9693712
Human, yes. Ours... well, in my game I found humans on Early Space Age, but not on Earth.
9693729
Oh, thank you.
9704559
Thanks!
Good job, Dungeoneer! This is a pretty good fic you made. Love how the character is both OP and normal (not overpowered against the 'demons'). I have a feeling this story would be more popular if you keep going. Thanks for reccomending and may friendship be with you :).
9711873
Thanks, and don't worry, I'll keep writing. I hope I'll be able to upload the next chapter before week's end. Most of it will be quite graphic though.
9712255
That's okay! I don't really mind the story being graphic, but I think it's a good idea to put a gore tag in it for other readers eventhough this is mature rated it doesn't hurt to be safe. If you want to do it I mean.
9718453
Thanks!
God I hope you never stop
9719844
I won't, but I need you guys to like and comment so that others may notice the story and read it too.
Personally, it's pretty descriptive and thought out. And I got that from reading the first chapter. And while it's not my kind of story since I've no clue about Stellaris or it's mechanics.
But overall, I give you props to making it sound interesting. Might even check it out sometime once I'm free from writing, although, I can't promise anything.
I'll make sure to add a like, and help you out some.
9720278
Thanks! I have to take ideas from other games since Stellaris is an RTS and this fanfic is about a bounty hunter centered on killing animals, not two super civilizations duking it out, since that already happened.
Several what??? Just cuts off.
Need an editor for quite a few errors, but the content is absolutely grand otherwise.
9736101
Nothing, it's a hold out from a previous version. Already fixed.
I quite appreciate the fact you know the difference between Sapience and Sentience. An appalling number get the two mixed or think they're the same thing. Odd when our entire species is classified as Homo Sapiens.
That and the telepathy reminded me of an old book series from the 70s or 80s, I think, that had humans achieve FTL travel via Psionics. Required extremely strong ones, one situated on the origin planet, and ideally one on the target planet though being on the ship is fine for exploration and emergencies. They literally use telekinesis to throw ships across the universe. One to speed up the ship and the other to slow it down. Both protect the insides and crew from the gravity. They're also capable of telepathy across the same distances though it's kept for emergencies as most can only do that far for a short time before they start getting headaches from the mental strain.
Luna isn’t just being stubborn and ungrateful, she being suicidal. Celestia confirmed that their magic literally does NOTHING to him, and yet she still thinks she can imprison him, and order him around? You should have him prove this point to her with this.
9736211
The flattering of her looks or waiting til she has a mouthful to bring up her death?
Fluttershy has one twisted sense of morality. I know she loves animals, but the truth is a sentient life doesn’t have the same value as a sapient one. She’d rather spare a vicious ursa going on a rampage, and endanger the lives it’s taking, then put it down to ensure no one dies. Praeratus would probably slay 1000 animals, without hesitation, if it meant saving 1 sapient life. And that’s something she’s just gonna have to live with.
9739561
She knew it was dangerous, but she also believed that, as Element of Kindness and animal handler all around she could calm it. The problem was that the Ursa Major was basically a Technically Living Zombie: living body but broken brain that only thinks in lashing out at everything. She simply hasn't dealed with something like that before.
We Demand More! :D
Nice job dude! This is a good chapter but I don't know any advice I could give you because I'm not good at these things, but for now keep on doing what you're doing. Keep on going strong my friend :)
P. S. - FIRST!
Reminds me of being in school and the teacher stepped out and no one would listen to the one a signed to watch the class and would be surprised when the teacher came back and basically asked
Can you give us a pic of what his armor looks like?
9764674
Which one of them?
Story's great but has a few errors.
Dang it, it was just getting good!
He should just use his powers to kill Neighsay in front of every noble in Canterlot. That'll shut him up, and get them to see what happens if they push him to far.