• Member Since 25th Jun, 2018
  • offline last seen 3 hours ago

Lets Do This


We're going to build an exact copy of Ponyville... right over there! We've got less than a minute!

E

No longer a powerless blank-flank, Twilight, together with her friends, faces the return of Nightmare Moon... with Twilight having no idea what her magic might do next!

Sequel to Twilight Runs Away.

Also serves as Luna's entry in the "Nightmare" series of independent stories about the redemption of each of the alicorn Princesses (see Friendmaker and Daybreaker). Note: you do not need to read these before Nightwaker. But if you choose to circle back to them at some point, I won't mind!

Chapters (3)
Join our Patreon to remove these adverts!
Comments ( 23 )

You can set this as a sequel to 'Twilight Runs Away' by copying and pasting the story url into the box that asks for it on this story.

9276849
Thanks for the advice! I haven't done that (yet) because it puts the sequel link in an inconvenient place in the description box. (I like to micromanage my text/link layout.)

9276959
Oh! Alrighty then. I know some people aren't sure how to do it, so it's always best to help.

Huh. Okay, you have my attention. I am very curious to see where this goes.

This is a interesting twist for sure. .... Honestly I really want to see where this will go from here. I really didn't like how they all and I mean all besides Twi treated Spike. I mean Celestia talked to him like he was really nothing but showed SO much care and attention to Twi, which I get but still kinda sucked she dismissed him so much. The BIGGEST ones to do it were the other girls. I mean I went back and looked at that part where they all showed up. They have a whole talk with Twi but don't even give Spike a Hello. Derpy at least talked to him. When Twi went missing, they treated Spike like a child and they went looking for her. Long story short while Twi seem to be closer to Spike in this series, everyone else seem to be treating him the same and I find that to be pretty sad. Seeing how in the last one he was the same age as Twi which mean he should be near the same age as the girls as well. The shouldn't be talking down to him like I feel they did. What I am hoping if we get keep seeing Spike and Twi being super close in this. He is the one that wen WITH her, even with all of this when all her friends have left her HE stayed. He isn't her assistant first, no he is her friend her best friend and not some child.

I do wonder how things will be different with Luna. I can't wait to see how she will train Twi. I get the feeling she will be far less sweet with her but will for sure give her all the attention she needs. But I feel the two will related to one another even more than Twi could with Celestia to be honest. I mean both have felt like outcast for most of their lives. So I can see them bonding from that angle. That is something Celestia can't relate to with both Twi and Spike. Which back to Spike I think she might also stop him from JUST being a assistant. He is a dragon, a strong and powerful species. He can do more than just run books around. He want to be with Twi, he want to protect her, than he need to work to do that and not hide behind her. Luna will make sure he get started being able to do that.

I think this is a super interesting change and I really want to see where this will go. I know as a super Spike fanboy it seems like I want him all over the story. But just after the first one when he was so close to Twi and felt like he had a large part in events I would hate for that to go away. There was a connection there and with the events that just happen I feel the two of them would be even closer than ever before.

9277088
Thanks for the feedback, and I'm with you, I agree that Spike isn't just Twilight's flunky -- they're a team. Not to give anything away, but rest assured that Spike has some good moments ahead, and a pretty crucial role in the outcome of this story (unlike in the original pilot, where he basically disappeared in the second half).

And bear in mind what the other characters are dealing with at the time: Celestia's racing the clock coming up with a backup plan to deal with Nightmare Moon, while making sure everyone is where they need to be. And Applejack thinks she's just seen her new best friend go up in smoke, so she's in big-sister mode, making sure everyone's looked after while she charges in to sort things out. They all care about each other, the story just can't always show it.

:moustache: Hey, why don't ya just tell them when ponies say hi to you, they're really smiling at me?
:twilightsheepish: Oh, hush, Spike!

9277178
Lol k well I am happy to hear all of that. Lol it is still sad I can't help as I am reading this think how cute this Spike and Twi would be as a couple. I know I am connecting dots that aren't there but I can't help but think how they just seem to fit each other so well and I have a hard time seeing anypony besides Starlight, Fizzle, or Sunset being good matches for Twi. And even with them being good matches I can't see them just connecting with her the same way THIS Spike did lol.

Excellent work on the start to your sequel story. The exchanges, characterizations, action and future chapter set-ups are all well done. I particularly liked Shiny's introduction to the story, the little subtle nod to the tie-in novels, Celestia's brief scene with Luna/Nightmare and Nightmare Moon's introduction to Ponyville.


I am very certainly going to be looking forward to seeing where you go with this.

Very interesting, and I LOVE the description of SPACE returning with Nightmare Moon. Definitely curious what happens next.

I wonder whether Twilight is actually responsible, or if this is just Nightmare messing with her? If she is, interesting. I've never seen Twilight as a harbinger of eternal night before. Or as an apocalyptic being in general really, beyond out of personal issues.

You know, if this Twilight has to take up the Alicorn Magic of Equestria to protect it from Tirek, she'll be better at it. She's already had to deal with a sudden incredible increase in magic power, complete with accidental teleports and everything.

9280216
Thanks much! And the description of Luna's night is pretty much a direct personal experience of one evening when I was staying somewhere with a totally clear night sky and almost no skyglow, and thus was able to see pretty much all the visible stars at once. ...Wow... It was nice being able to pull that in as an indication of the change of Princesses.

She smiled, getting into it. And wooly-headed academic texts, full of obfuscatory blathering. And flat-earther tracts... and pseudoscience of every sort... we shall tolerate no lies in our domain! They shall have the cold, unstinting truth, as sharp and exact as our Night! And if they fear the truth, we shall torment them with it, relentlessly, inescapably... until they SCREAM FOR MERCY!

Huh... I suddenly find myself far more amenable to the prospect of Night Eternal. Nightmare Moon for president 2020.

9291385
🌛✨ Have a care what thou wishes for...
But I'm with you, Nightmare Moon is speaking from the heart here. :twilightsmile:

9291403
Thinkst thou that I know not the implications of mine own desires? Forsooth, our fair country has done worse.

This was interesting for sure. I couldn't stop screaming, ' HOW DID AJ GET THERE!!!!' for the whole chapter after that point I kept thinking she was really Nightmare pretending to get close to her and find out if she knows anything about the elements.

Spike kept bugging me tho, it is just he always refer to himself as her assistant more than a friend. THAT should be how he addresses himself to her first. Man Celestia really brainwashed him and made him into alittle slave. I figured after the first story that might have been broken a bit but it is clear that isn't the case.

Hell Twilight seem to care or at least address the girls as more friends than him and he is the one that stayed with her and all of this. I wonder what Twi's plan will be, I mean she will best chance look for the elements in the castle, but she doesn't know what they look like or where they could be

. One thing that seems to be a huge thing to me is that Nightmare SCREAMS moody teenager to me. Just the way she acts and seem to think scream a emo 16 year old. Like whenever Celestia comes up or just really her whole hang up. I think THAT might be the thing that they will have to play to get what they want. Praise her, make her feel wanted and admired. To keep that feeling she will open up to them. Even more so when she see all the people aren't 'loving' her as she wants them to.

We have always wanted to construct a Forbidden Books list, she thought.

Well, there went even the slightest chance she had of ever convincing Twilight to help her.


9291414
Please remember that we live on a round world, and thus any form of eternal night for America means scorching death for the other side of the earth.

...Wait. She complained about flat-earthers in Equestria. That means that the world of Equus (or whatever name you prefer) is also round, and she knows it, and oh my gosh she willingly condemned the other side of the planet to burn.

9291586

...any form of eternal night for America means scorching death for the other side of the earth.

Sadly, some forms of Eternal Night fall everywhere... particularly if you're the one who's supposed to be holding the lamp...

...Wait. She complained about flat-earthers in Equestria. That means that the world of Equus (or whatever name you prefer) is also round, and she knows it, and oh my gosh she willingly condemned the other side of the planet to burn.

I'm kind of assuming the geometry of the world is an open question, and the flat-earthers and spherists are the Little-Endians and Big-Endians of the day -- neither side knows they're right, they just know the other side is wrong... :twilightsmile:

Thanks very much for getting the next chapter up. I really appreciate you going to the effort. You did a great job on the exchanges, characterizations, action and future chapter set-up in all the right places. I especially liked Nightmare Moon's basically taking none of Neighsay's garbage , Nightmare Moon's introduction to Pony Joe's , Spike, Shiny AND AJ's attempts to help Twilight overcome her guilt over her accidental role in Nightmare Moon's return (particularly Twi figuring Shiny and Cadance out MUCH sooner than in canon) and Twilight's attempt to play along with Nightmare Moon while also trying to buy her friends as much time as she can (even if her friends understandably DON'T understand it all at first) .


So, yeah, I will very certainly be looking forward to seeing where this goes in future chapters.

9291852
Thanks right back! It's fair to say this sequel exists because of feedback like yours on Twilight Runs Away, and it's encouraging to know I've been able to provide a worthy follow-up!

And about Neighsay... well, all I can say is, if I could pick any pony for Nightmare Moon to chuck out of the room with his robes on fire, it would have to be him. I was pretty certain nobody would mind :twilightsmile:

This was really nice. I liked the way you wrapped it up and still tied it all together to the canon and all. It was a great story with a nice closing. I still had to laugh that Spike got so shafted in this. I mean Twi couldn't even give him a real decent comment at the end there. I had to role my eyes so hard I almost went blind lol. But I kinda gave up on Spike having any REAL big or change part in this story a while ago it was still funny how this time he had to BE there for his complete overlooking and placing as a B-C list character in the world lol.

Excellent job on the action, characterizations, exchanges and general wrap-up in all the right places. I particularly liked Twilight's checking up on Shining and Fluttershy , the logical alterations to how each pony earned their element and Spike's simple, but still significant contribution concerning Twilight's realizations .


All in all, a very good conclusion to this story.

9305018
Thanks much for the helpful feedback! This was by way of an experiment, to see whether publishing a longer story by parts would work well -- and it's reassuring seeing regulars coming back for the next installment! :twilightsmile:

9305156
Thanks very much right back. And, yeah, I would say that this particular experiment WAS a success. :-D


And Happy Thanksgiving to you and your family.

Login or register to comment
Join our Patreon to remove these adverts!