Twilight Gets a Puppy
By TDR
Brindle Gossip
[Ponyville. One week after the storm]
“Wow what a gorgeous day.” Twilight smiled looking up at the sky. The summer was not over yet but the breeze was cooler than usual, signaling fall was not far off and that the dog days of summer had ended.
“Yeah, I guess Rainbow Dash got up early for once.” Spike snarked from his perch on Twilight's back.
“I bet every pony is going to be out enjoying this.” Twilight smiled.”It's not often that the weather is this perfect.”
Rahs simply yawned as he walked along with them, his tattered maroon long coat stitched back up, though inexpertly by his own paws, as such it looked more like a Frankenstirrup creation than a proper coat.
As the trio walked down the main street towards the shops they noticed a surprising lack of ponies in the streets or around the stalls.
“Umm where is every one?” Spike asked. “Is there some rural holiday we weren't told about?”
“Not likely. There was nothing on my calender today about anything special. The Mayor let me copy her event calender.” Twilight stated.” There's nothing on a Tuesday for the whole year.”
“Err maybe everyone's in a big game of hide and seek?” Spike suggested.” Or maybe... Zombies?”
Twilight glared back at her brother who was looking at Rahs. The Moon Dog sniffed the air then shook his head before pointing at Sugar Cube corner.
“Spike... Twilight..... Rahs..... come here.” hissed a voice. The trio blink noticing Pinkie Pie in the shadowy doorway of the shop.
“What?” Spike questioned.
“Hurry, before she gets you.” Pinkie Pie hissed again.
Twilight blinked looking around before the three of them quickly moved into the doorway only for it to slam shut behind them.
Inside the dark Sugar Cube Corner the trio were blinded by a flashlight before they could ask the important questions.
"Gah, my eyes, Pinkie, what?!” Twilight snapped, as Rahs whined.
“Is it zombie ponies?” Spike asked.
“Zooooommmbie ponies!?” Pinkie stated spookily making Spike clutch his sister tighter choking her.
Twilight coughed shaking her brother loose and letting him fall to the floor with a thud. "Pinkie what are you doing here alone in the dark?”
“Oh I'm not alone in the dark.” Pinkie smiled into the flashlight before she panned it around showing Applejack, Applebloom, Rarity, Rainbow Dash, and Fluttershy.
“Okay then … what are 'all' of you doing here in the dark?” Twilight corrected.
“You okay Spike?” Applebloom asked looking down at the Dragon laid out on the floor.
“I've had worse.” Spike grumbled into the wood.
“We're hiding from her.” Applejack pointed out the heavily curtained window to a figure at the far end of the street. The figure wore a brown hooded cloak and was stamping the ground with one hoof as she looked around. Her gaze ran over Sugar Cube Corner, her amber eyes glimmering under the hood.
Twilight and Rahs blinked as all the others suddenly dove for cover away from the window when the figure looked their way. Neither of them looked very happy with the rest of the group.
“Did yah see her? Did yah see Zecora?” Applebloom asked peering over the top of Spike's head.
“Applebloom ah told yah never tah say that name.” Applejack snapped.
“Well what tha heck am ah supposed tah call her then?” Applebloom glared back at her sister.
“Well I saw her look this way.” Twilight admitted.
“Look this way evilly you mean?” Pinkie Pie corrected.
“Honestly Pinkie I've seen you look more evilly at a stack of cupcakes Applejack made than what she just did” Twilight grumbled.” Then I watched all of you flip out for no good reason.”
“No good reason?” Applejack snorted grabbing Applebloom in a foreleg”Yah call protecting yer kin no good reason? Soon as Applebloom saw her coming intah town she started shaking in her little horseshoes.”
“Did not.. ah didn't even see her afore yah shoved me in here tah hide!” Applebloom fussed.
“So ah swept her up and brought her here.”
“Ah walked here maiself!” Applebloom protested.
“Fer safe keeping.” Applejack snapped.
“Applejack ah ken take care of maiself ah ain't a little foal!” Applebloom protested.
“Not from Zecora yah ain't!” Applejack muttered.
“She's mysterious.” Fluttershy pointed out.
“Sinister” Rainbow Dash pantomimed.
“And Spooky!” Pinkie Pie added
Spike had finally caught onto where this was going and was now standing with Rahs and Twilight staring at the others like they had grown second heads.
“And?” Twilight asked.
“What do you mean and?” Rarity asked.
“I mean 'and' what? Half the ponies in this town are Mysterious, including Pinkie Pie here. Rahs could fall under the sinister looking category, and according to Fluttershy, her own root cellar is spooky. None of that says dangerous, threatening, or even problematic.” Twilight snapped looking out the window again.
In the distance Zecora seemed to be getting tired of wandering around the evidently abandoned town. She pulled off her hood, her ears perking up to listen for any sign of life, gold jewelry dangled from her ears as she looked around the town, her white fur marked with gray stripes and a Mohawk rose up from her head.
The rest of the group had gathered around Twilight to look out the window again, collectively gasped as the hood was pulled back.
“Will you cut that out!” Twilight snapped.
“Just look at those stripes. So garish.” Rarity scoffed.
“She's a Zebra.” Spike stated.
“Ah what?” The collected gasp sounded again as the siblings rolled their eyes.
“This is a Tuesday thing isn't it? It's something not on the Mayors itinerary that every Tuesday every pony in town has to take hard drugs or have some sort of head trauma for the day just so the collective herd IQ drops by fifty percent isn't it.” Twilight growled into her fore hooves.
“A Zebra. A native of the southern reaches of Equestria. Her stripes aren't a fashion choice that's how she was born.” Spike explained.” One of Twilight's teachers was a Zebra. History I think?”
“Geography.” Twilight corrected. “Any way I didn't know there were any Zebras in Ponyville. Most Zebras stay much further south given they don't like the cold weather so much. Mr. Monochrome was always complaining about how cold it got here.”
“That's just it …. she lives in the Everfree Forest.” Applejack muttered.
“Well that explains why I haven't seen her before.” Twilight shrugged nonchalantly.
“What? That's yer reaction? She lives 'in' Tha Everfree Forest!” Applejack snapped.
“Okay Fluttershy practically lives in the Everfree Forest, Rarity has been there constantly looking for Gems, you yourself have admitted to taking trips into the forest which is how we found the Castle in the first place. Rainbow Dash has to go over it to deal with her weather duties and Rahs hunts there.” Twilight pointed out.” Sure there's dangerous things in there, but so long as your careful you'll be fine.”
“Wait Rahs hunts in there? Fer what?” Applebloom asked.
“Mostly Cockatrice. Their stare doesn't work on him, he says they taste just like chicken. He also gets paid a bounty by the local Guard for proof that he took them out.” Spike offered.
“Neat!” Applebloom beamed.
“If she lives inside the forest she probably has a way to keep the things in there at bay, or her home is just fairly well hidden so nothing bothers it.”Twilight continued. “Seriously this sort of thing is out of character for all of you, except Rarity.”
“What?” Rarity demanded.
“Remember your first encounter with Rahs?” Twilight deadpanned.
“That was different.......” Rarity protested trailing off as she thought about it a moment.”Never mind. I concede your point.”
“The Everfree Forest just ain't natural. The plants grow without any help.”Applejack protested.
“Animals care for themselves...” Fluttershy added.
“And the clouds, form and move all on their own.” Rainbow Dash shouted
“I am this close to hitting all three of you with a dictionary, as what you have described is the VERY definition of natural.” Twilight frowned.
“And that wicked enchantress Zecora lives there doing her wicked evil..... stuff.....” I even wrote a song about her!” Pinkie Pie opened her mouth to start singing only for Rahs' paw to slap over her muzzle as he folded his ears back shaking his head before letting her go.
“Ehh I guess you're right, it is a work in progress after all.” Pinkie Pie shrugged.
“Alright, all I have heard from any of you is a lot of gossip and rumors. What exactly have any of you SEEN Zecora do?” Twilight asked rubbing her temples.
“Well once a month she comes into Ponyville.” Rainbow Dash stated.
“Ooh, how awful.......” Twilight dead panned.
“Then she lurks by the stores.” Fluttershy added.
“Yah don't say.....” Twilight mocked.
“Well then she digs at the ground....” Fluttershy added.
“Oh the horror!” Twilight called out feigning a faint.
Rahs rolled his eyes before clapping at his sister performance.
“Okay seriously, how is any of this bad. Have any of you ever thought she might come into town for supplies, only to find every store mysteriously closed up and every pony hiding !?” Twilight demanded. While I don't understand the digging part it might be a nervous habit born of frustration that the next closest town to the Everfree is on the other side of the forest. “
“Yer sister is making a lotta good points.” Applebloom stated to Spike.
“She does that. The question is are any of them going to 'listen' to her points?” Spike sighed.
“Mai bits are on no. Adults are stupid when it comes tah new things an changes.” Applebloom sighed.
“Tell me about it. You should have heard all the uproar when Princess Luna came back and Canterlot turned into a Diarchy again.”Spike added. “ Even though it was that before her banishment.”
“BORK!” Rahs growled at the rest of the protesting mares.
“Right. Has any one here even bothered to go up and talk with her to find out the truth?” Twilight asked.
This question launched into a number of other arguments among the others and Twilight. The rambling of Pinkie along with it just made the argument that much more chaotic as every pony tried to talk over everypony else..
Applebloom frowned watching the adults act like idiots.
“Spike. Ah'm gonna go an talk with her.”Applebloom stated with a determined look in her eyes.
“You think that's a good idea?” Spike asked.
“Ain't none of them gonna do it and some pony has to.” Applebloom sighed.
“Well alright. Let's go.” Spike added with a shrug waddling towards the door. “Twi's gonna flip out soon and I'd rather not be here when that happens. Besides if she is a threat, I'm a Dragon.”
“Thanks Spike.” Applebloom smiled as the pair of them made their way out the door while every one else was arguing.
“Well I heard, Zecora eats hay!” Pinkie Pie declared.
Rahs simply threw his paws in the air, and fell back on the floor clutching his face as if the stupid hit him directly on the nose.
Ignoring her overly dramatic brother Twilight glared at Pinkie. “ Pinkie, I eat hay, you eat hay, nearly every pony eats hay! It's a dietary staple!”
“Yeah, but I heard she eats it evilly.” Pinkie Pie counted.
“By Celestia's tail, WHAT DOES THAT EVEN MEAN!? How do you eat something evilly? Eating is a biological function of life! Does she twirl her mustache after every bite or something!?” Twilight cried out.
“Sounds about right.” Pinkie Pie pointed out as Twilight screamed into her hooves.
“Hey where's Applebloom” Applejack yelped.
“And Spike?” Pinkie Pie pointed out.
“The door's open!”Fluttershy gasped.
“They must have went outside.” Rarity gasped.
“And Zecora's still out there!” Rainbow Dash cried.
“ I told that silly filly to stay put!” Applejack wailed.
“Calm down. Spike's with her, I'm sure she'll be.......” Twilight frowned as the others rushed out of the building leaving her and her brother behind. “..... fine. Right, okay, lets go, it seems half my job in Ponyville is stopping my friends from doing something stupid.”
Rahs smirked as the pair of them rushed out of the shop, chasing after the others.
Applebloom stopped suddenly as the shadows to the trees fell on her fore hooves. Spike simply kept walking, though he was trying to keep Zecora in sight and his stubby legs were slowing them down.
Seeing her friend continue on, she pushed past her fear and headed into the forest after Zecora.
The pair of them had just spotted her again on the other side of a field of blue flowers and were in the process of cutting through the blue plants when the thunder of hooves behind them caught their attention.
“APPLEBLOOM!” shouted Applejack.
“Drat, they caught up....” Applebloom grumbled ducking down into the flowers trying to hide, though her red bow stuck up out of the blue too far for that to be effective. Spike didn't bother trying to hide as he noticed that Zecora had stopped to look back at them and the others that had come up behind her with confusion evident on her face.
“ You get over here right now!” Applejack shouted running into the flowers with the others and scooping Applebloom up off the ground and putting her behind the other four mares in the flowers that were behind the group before she turned back to glare at Zecora.
Twilight and Rahs caught up a moment later walking past the others to where Spike was in the field.
“Seriously, what's the big idea running off like that without telling me or Rahs?” Twilight chided.” You shouldn't do that.”
“Pfft like any one was listening any way, you couldn't even get a word in edgewise most of the time.” Spike grumbled. “ Also how do you think that lot would have reacted to someone trying to find out the truth?”
“Point.” Twilight admitted looking over at the hooded Zebra. Rahs stood next to her, watching the striped mare as well, though he lifted a paw offering a small wave to Zecora.
The Zebra took one look at the Moon Dog, and started backing away quickly, completely ignoring the others, before she darted into the mists of the forest.
“Well that was anticlimactic.” Twilight sighed trying to ignore the others yelling at the Zebra, save Rarity who was oddly quiet, and Applejack who was fussing at Applebloom.
“And you couldn't just listen to your big sister!?” Applejack demanded.
“Not when you was being stupid!” Applebloom fussed back from where she had been placed by Applejack.
“ Ah I wasn't being stupid! I was trying to protect you!” Applejack shouted. “ Who knows what kind of curse Zecora coulda put on you!”
“No I agree with Applebloom. You were and still are being pretty stupid. Also, no such things as curses. Anything that is called a curse is always little more than superstitious hooey or trickery. If she had cast a spell Rahs would have noticed it. All she did was run away, probably because we looked like a Celestia damned lynch mob.” Twilight stated walking past the group of them, headed back towards town with Spike and Rahs behind her. “Though right now however, I'm done trying to argue with any of you. I've reached my limit of being able to interact with Ponies today, so I'm going home.Please don't bother me any more today with anything shy of another Ursa attacking.”
Twilight picked up Spike dropping him on her back as she marched through the flowers with Rahs following along behind her.
The Moon Dog paused at the edge of the field of blue flowers the others were still standing in. He looked down at the lily like flowers giving a small sniff of the air before shrugging and heading off with his siblings, leaving the others behind.
first, but great story
Just happen to catch up on the story to find a new one where i caught up xD
thanks keep them coming
8658963
My chapter speed is nuts.
I love the snark on this version of Twilight, makes me happy that book horse is finally able to apply the correct amount of snark we all now that she is capable of. Thank you for making this. By the way, Trixie and Rahs, please?
I actually like this snarkier Twilight. It helps keeps things fresh when rehashing over infamous/famous plot points. I am rather curious as to where this will go. After all Spike wasn't originally hit with Poison Joke, so I'm betting he'll be "Cursed" this time around >=)
I ship Applebloom and Spike..... though come to think of itI don’t remember their ages. Also, loving Twilight’s snark.
8659041
Twilight Snarkle is is the most common name for those moments.
I love it.
missing quote
Floating quote.
More floatiness.
except*
It's a bit rough elsewhere too. Do you self-edit, or do you have another pair of eyes that helps?
8659105
I love this Twilight. She shares something in common with Deadpool:
i.pinimg.com/564x/2e/ba/21/2eba21e638de86e127d4e6ccc1d3a809--common-sense-superpower.jpg
So, Applebloom hid in the flowers? That might be interesting. Only thing I am unsure about is if Rah's walked through them or not. I guess he did. At least there was no mention of him walking around them.
i did have to go look up if 'brindle' was a word before i could read the chapter. yay puns!
I expect something great for the effect of poison jokes on the added characters =) (we have too many change of gender or specie on fictions...)
8659177
another thought is will this affect Shining because any magic applied to ras also affected Spike,
Twilight, and Shining. (remember shining almost getting expelled for catching on fire during school one day felt this connection was found out)
not saying it has to but I think it'd be funny if this actually affected shining and potentially Cadence (I don't know if it ever stayed if she was connected or not)
Twilight pointed several of Ponyville's strange facts in this chapter.
Twilight should write the book "Snark Comments for Dummies".
8659290
Maybe it change Rahs to Fluffy ponies?
8658972
She had a different up bringing this go round.
8658999
Neither was Applebloom
8659041
AB is about 8 or 9 Spike is 12. Guestimate in AB's case.
8659128
Fixed what you pointed out and it's self editing. I have two editors but i'm WAAAAAY past them.
8659177
The whole crew walked through them. Rahs was really the only one who noticed them though.
8659189
Type of coloration.
8659290
And this is why i wanted to write this Episode.
8659391
Heart butt was never connected.
A perfect representation of Twilight Snarkle, and justly deserved.
This just helps to prove that the ponies of rural Equestria are speciest. I honestly hope Twilight, with backing from the Crown, makes the entirety of Ponyville take a 12 hour sensitivity training course. I would pay to see season 1 Rainbow have to sit for 12 hours and learn to be more culturally sensitive
8659718
... Still shipping it.
I thought Apple Bloom two words ? At least that’s how it shown in credits
8661839
It is two words. Some people just assume that its one word.
Another Win for Logic.
How and why are any of these people friends again? They seem to completely loathe each other.
8824073
Ponies are skittish unless raised with common sense. Or are a child. Fucking idiots.
the reason for that twi is cause Tuesday has an non-negotiable reservation for shenanigans anything from bunny stampede to bugbear attack to END OF THE WORLD
This was perfect!
As soon as i saw the title in my mind i screamed "You MAD MAN!" because of the double pun, and i swear i could hear someone laughing maniacally in the background.
Twilight has a reason to be pissed, the sheer amount of stupid here is staggering
Huh... Fighting stupidity is not just taxing but quite the challange... Impressive! They pulled a Snips and Snails while not even noticing it
Wonder how Ponyville would react to:
Changelings, Deer, Seaponys, Sphinx, Bicorn (if they are a thing here ), Harpys etc etc...
Face tabe or face ground for when can’t cover it and for when there’s no table around.
MOOD
If Zecora would be a Diamond Dog i might see their point. But since she is not i say they are willingly stupid like Snips and Snails are...
You know, it's clear this episode was about black people, but I think a Griffon or another race would have worked a lot better:
- Griffon, meat eater/Predator and greedy.
- Kirins, ponies that when becoming aggressive start to burn and are a fire threat.
- Sphinx, meat eater/Predator and greedy and very big as well as long lived as Alicorns. A true threat.
- Diamond Dogs, maybe because they foalnap ponies for labor?
- Minotaur perhaps? But Lyra loves them for their hands...