• Member Since 12th Mar, 2016
  • offline last seen 10 hours ago

black night sun


T

I used to be an adult. Then everything went wrong. I don't know how, or why, but now I'm in the body of a five year old. That's not even the worst part. There's a murderer in my head and a psychopathic flower that travels with me. I don't know if I'll make it outta this situation alive, but you better believe I'm DETERMINED.

EDIT: also shout out to my main man rezas who helps me write all of my stories

Chapters (10)
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Comments ( 115 )

Wow. This was so good. I'll be tracking...

This going to be GOOD!

Needs some editing, but not a huge amount. (I'm offering, if you're interested. Preferably on Google Docs. Check the bookshelf on my profile for previous editing.)

As a big fan of Undertale, I am interested. Also, I'm not a huge fan of "already knowing what Displaced are", but I like completely omitting how it happened. There's too many seriously overused clichés there.

8354677
Technically the most unoriginal cliche is complaining something is unoriginal. Because that's been going on since humanity began judging every piece of art created...

Oh this is going to be good. Awesome start author person, keep at it.

8354503

MORE!! also here have a like *throws a like to your face at 40 mph*

8355245

*gets knocked out and can't write anymore today by the like*

8354767
I didn't say "unoriginal cliche", I said "overused cliché", "Unoriginal cliche" is redundant.

8355388
Okay I can understand that but the character is a displaced writer who got displaced

This is interesting. I'm looking forward to seeing how this plays out.

8355388
Still, complaining about cliches still validates that you're the one being the most unoriginal here by complaining about unoriginal ideas.

So from everyone's opinion so far would you say this is a good or a bad story? I'm only asking cuz I'm reading a lot of things right now and I don't want to jump to this metaphorical pool only to find out that it's filled with piranhas.:trixieshiftleft:

8355648
Well I honestly don't care if anyone really likes it or not I'm doing it for the fun of writing which most authors forget about and try to Pander to the followers they have

8355655
Good for you man it's nice to have some confidence!

Comment posted by Emtu deleted Aug 9th, 2017
Comment posted by black night sun deleted Aug 10th, 2017

8356365 my sorry but my co-author is out for the night

Good job. It's very similar to Under-tale and I like it. Keep it up!

Frisk! Stay DETERMINED!


P.S. Imma go check out this 'door amv' thing...

Sgt Jackass? A bit over-enthusiastic with the discriptive names, aren't we?:ajsmug:

I laughed when frisk said really

“ My eyes! Can’t. Claw them. Out. Fast. Enough! ” Chara shouted in Frisks mind, making the girl giggle at the demons overreaction.

SUCK IT CHARA! :rainbowlaugh:

MOAR BEFORE I FORCE YOU BOTH TO LISTEN TO JUSTIN BIEBER'S ENTIRE SONG LIST!! MMMUUUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH:pinkiecrazy:

pixelartmaker.com/art/a935d4a24441eb8.png

"Knowing the author is still working on the story fills you with Determination"

Anyway, right now we were going to Zecora’s hut in the woods, me faking ignorance so my future knowledge didn’t mess too much up with the butterfly effect. As we walked, I thought about what had happened after I’d woken up.

Being there in the first place would cause such a massive fluctuation in the timeline that you openly knowing what's gonna happen won't change much more. As long as you don't go around telling people important details or trying to change it.
But they can know that you know.

and Pinkie Pie just smiled and wave, boys. Smile and wave

Penguins!

YEAH! TAKE THAT CHEESELEGS!

The song works so well

If I’m Frisk, and that’s Flower

You mean Flowey

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