I am known as knight sparks,I have been a undead for...I don't know how long,I'v had odd dreams and after each dream I wake up back at the beginning,I was beginning to see a pattern in them...until one time during my re-awakening,I did not see the knight, the same knight that always dropped the hallow corpse holding the key to my freedom...I was awakened in a forest,but thats not the scary part for me...the scary part,something I never thought i'd see...was a small equine, kicking down apples from a tree in the distance...and this is where the strangeness only begins
Chapters (36)
I'm guessing that you go to American school? Grammar is as pitiful as American education system and it reeks of laziness. If you do not know how to spell certain words such as brought, than maybe you should just take a step back and think before you submit :/
4546108 yes i go to a american school, and they don't teach English for shit their,and im american,and their are some words i can spell perfectly and others that i check with the red line thing,if it doesn't show up,i'll assume its fine,it didn't show up with that word so blame auto correct
4546125 My friend, when you assume you make an ass out of yourself. Don't rely on auto correct :/ Read a book, buy a dictionary or pay attention in class. In Austrian classes, we would have whipped you into shape :)
4546132 i actually sort of HAVE to rely on auto correct because when i write these things im often doing 4 other things all at the same time
4546146 My friend, all I am saying is that assuming something will only lead to trouble. Don't assume :) Be 100% sure of what you type.
I can tell you right now, I have tried to help authors in featured box clean up mistakes and they are very rude about it. Don't be those authors :)
Looking forward to this story!
4546150 well as much as i would love to clean up my mistakes i have very little time,i got up at 4 AM to write this and trust me it is hard to focus,and i have no proof readers,i used to but she left,so theirs a nip in my ass,and while i would like to thank you for your help,i honestly do not notice the mistakes myself,i myself am 100% sure but others tell me other wise even though i don't notice anything and im a bit busy trying to continue the story,all be it while under very poor conditions due to my fucked up sleep schedual
4546160 thanks
im looking forward to writting it
4546167
Haha! Good one! Good one, my friend :)
XD Fav'd
4546176
I'm dead serious.
4546180 Because you made a poor joke about an american being educated. My friend, there are jokes and there is being ridiculous :/
4546178 hehe thanks im glad someone is enjoying my story
4546181
Can we not argue? Do you want me to call the admins again? What you're saying has nothing to do with the story, and we shouldn't start a fight again.
4546187 Fine >:/ but you better watch your back, my friend
4546191
Thank you.
4546207 look at the amount of fucks i give: none :3 sorry,i gave all my fucks away to shit that actually matters,unlike your trolling
4546191 Please for once shut the fuck up. You're not giving any criticism to this author, you're just insulting him. All because he's an American that don't mean he's not well educated or go to a well educated school you racist son of bitch. I'm an American and I'm fucking well known around here because I write readable stories.
Stop saying my friend at the end of every fucking sentence, my friend. Now the author I do suggest you get an editor or proofreader to fix those mistakes because I could see errors in the title and that will make your story look bad.
Well, I'll be fair: The story has potential. However, there is one glaring problem: the grammar. Okay, I know, you got up at 4:00 A.M. to write this, so I can understand the grammar errors, but at least get some rest, come back, and then proofread it? I get it, you're not good at English either, as you said in one of your comments. Even so, don't always rely on autocorrect, try to get a friend to help you or something! Hell, try to get a proofreader! The grammar kills the story so horrifically that it's like a public execution!
I don't mean to sound like a dick, the idea is fun, and the little reference AJ made was funny, but I can't overlook the grammar. Good grammar helps a story flow, like blood in the body. Here, it's almost like it's being flooded out the body through a massive gash or is just so congealed it can't move.
Again, has potential, but needs proofreading badly.
4546243 ooooh thank celestia for you,you amazing pearson
4546248 thank you,this comment would have left a better first impression because this,the comment you left right now its called constructive criticism which i love reading because it gives me tips on how to improve my things,so thanks i'll try taking this advice to heart
4546243
fc00.deviantart.net/fs71/f/2013/059/7/2/gigan_1972__megalon_motivator_by_crvemaster-d5v66ay.jpg
4546258
No problem, comrade.
4546269 and i actually do have a friend who is willing to proof read,i just haven't asked him since hes busy with his brother coming home after 2 years so after his party tomorrow the chapters will most likely come around mid day and (hopefully if he knows what hes doing) have allot better grammer
4546279
I hope so, too. Because if he is, this story is honestly going to shine rather brightly.
4546284 thats good to hear because i have honestly never had a story that people liked ^_^ other than my other story but that has the same problem as this one (and im also at a writers stump so i started this) i'll try to get other proof readers to double check if i can
4546295
I know that feel very well.
4546321 welcome to the internet,where shit does not make sense and logic is everyone's whimpering bitch,here is your logic,do as you wish
4546181 I'm American and well-educated.
Capitalize i. It should be I.
4546471 huh,I thought I did
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What the fuck is this bullshit?
4546328
4546738 No one needs your opinion Nazi Bitch!
4546801 Oh hey, you. Still retarded as ever, I see. How have you been?
4546806 I'm doing good and thanks for asking, but thats not the point!
4546815 Then what is the point? Do you just like coming in and randomly calling me a Nazi?
4546826 Maybe.
4546738 psssssttt...no one gives a shit about your opinion .3.
So many comments that have nothing to do with the story.....
4546948 it is honestly pretty irratating for me since im getting spammed
too many comments that are not about the story
4546958 I can only imagine.... Since I'm here, I might as well give you some advice! Basically, the people in the comments are right. It does seem as if you need an editor, since bad grammar and punctuation will turn people off. Luckily, it seems as if you are someone who is willing to accept constructive criticism! Therefor, I strongly advise you to try to appoint an editor. Besides that, I personally find your story and your characters interesting! This story has great potential!
4546975 and as i said to someone else i do have a plan for someone to edit the story :3 hes a close and trusted friend but it may take a bit longer for the chapters to come out,and im glad people like the story and characters (or more accurately character since so far theirs only sparky who you all don't know and lord gwyn is the final boss so yea) im trying to make this as interesting as possible
4547001 Awesome! Keep it up!
4547014 thank you