• Member Since 27th Oct, 2011
  • offline last seen Mar 4th, 2012

Pinkie Pyro


YOU DONT KNOW ME

T

Not too long before Luna's banishment, her and Celestia found the 7th Element of Harmony. This element was known to corrupt the wielder if they are not the correct one, and Celestia's mind has been set to tyrant. One thousand years later, Luna has once again returned to Equestria, but Celestia's evil plot doesn't end there.

Chapters (9)
Join our Patreon to remove these adverts!
Comments ( 106 )

Um... it's not like the story was bad or anything, but I had a hard time following it at points and it wasn't too terribly interesting... not mucn in the way of plot hook aside from the new silver pony and Twi's mysterious "accident". I think. I'm kind of a stickler in that regard, though... take that part with a grain of salt.

It just needs some cleaning up, in my opinion, and it'll be fine. :twilightsmile:

19439 Oh don't worry, this is just an intro. Chapter two will go more in-depth on the "accident" and, even better, Luna.

Hmmmm not sure where this is going. Any hint on when the next chapter is gonna be out? It's pretty interesting so far and the cliffhangers are gonna kill me :fluttershyouch:

I'm sorry but theres a huge problem in this chapter, TRIXIE IS DEAD!!! Ok now that that's taken care of your story is a little choppy, it kinda jumps around a lot if you smooth that out it should turn out great. Btw you'd better have Trixie being resurrected or I'll be forced to...cOmment on the subject?:derpytongue2:

21449 Or is she? This new pony may not be who she says she is.

21531
Oh I didn't think of that. One would think that with all the doctor who I watch I would pick up possible twists like that. But now that you point that out. I must say, interesting.

Oh my gosh I just reread it. I am now very intrigued. :rainbowderp:

I see what you did there. Very interesting and I suppose the opposite of happy for the newly married couple would be to be jelous of the bride, or one of the brides? What ever, great story keep writing. I do hope you can get the rest of this chapter up though, it does seem cut short. I would suggest writing the story in word and then copy/pasting it in. That should avoid you any glitching.

22956 Give me about an hour. :raritywink:

BEEP:pinkiegasp: BEEP:pinkiegasp: IMMA JEEP :flutterrage:

22956 Thanks to computer crashes caused by microsoft word, I got three versions I wanna add. Cant add them all, though. So here's a choice.

A. Pinkie's normal, Earthquake hits, Fluttershy is killed, Rainbow gives up element of loyality to bring her back.
B. Bomb goes off, everyone but Dash is killed, Rainbow gives up element of loyality to bring them all back.
C. Remove the Rainbow corruption scene entirely and move onto Rarity, saving Rainbow's for later.

Any wants? :twilightblush:

I choose the hidden answer:
F. None of the above they all have a big group hug and decide that Rainbow belongs to everypony cause that's what they want.

You might not know it yet but that is one of your choices :pinkiehappy:

Id definitely go with A as long as you do actually bring fluttershy back, but I would suggest adding at least a little bit of them enjoying married life together (no I don't mean bedroom life) before that. Also you might want to check that you haven't angered the lords of technology.

And that thing about using word was my evil twin, honest. (liarjack face)

23505 What happened to D and E? :rainbowhuh:

:rainbowhuh:Really? First you kill off Trixie in a very stupid fashion now Pinky suddenly beats up RD because she had feelings for her and then a doctor says that the cause is Loyalty. I started this story intrigued, then a little sad and confused, and now it's just stupid. :facehoof:

24681 Ugh, do I have to explain EVERYTHING?

One. Trixie is NOT dead. Two. That wasn't Pinkie. It was Pinkamena, Discorded. Three. The Doctor wasn't real. He was Discord.

Blame the chaos. :trixieshiftleft:

I see you went with option A good choice. I do hate myself for suggesting you kill my favorite pony but you promised to bring her back, right :ajbemused:. Anyways still very entertaining.

I just wanted to say, good luck, we're all counting on you.

27208
I thought I explained it well enough, I guess not.

Fluttershy never died. She was never there, neither was the hospital or the doctor. It was a Discord mind trick. A trick Rainbow fell for. Now Celestia has 2 of the 6 elements needed for her 'master plan'. :trollestia:

Thank you for Whore twillight ...
Big macintosh in trouble ?
Don't help.:twilightsmile:
WAIT ? he may have informations ?:twilightoops:
... YOURE MY FRIENNNNNNND !

Or let him die ...:twilightsheepish:
yes let him die, it's way better
twillight don't care.
Thanks and goodbye .

My suggestion; and this is meant as no offense. This is where your story is going, but it has arrived at this point way too early. So I suggest remove thichapter and adding q few in-between. For more practical matters there are a few descrepences for instance: big Mac calls Applejack his big sister, if I'm not mistaken Fluttershy died in the last chapter, and lastly Fluttershy married to Rainbow would be Fluttershy Dash, if anything Flutterdash would be there child if that were possible. Now that that is out of the way, it is definitely an interesting chapter, and I look forward to some explanation of some of these event (prefferable in a prechapter).

27823
Oh crap didnt see that:derpyderp1:. Well forget about my comment about Fluttershy dying, but the rest of my previous comment stands. Also I must have missed that explanation somewhere but I got that discord was doctor q.

28207

The big sis meant two things.

One; Of the SISTERS, Applejack is the big sister.
Two; I always thought Applejack as the elder, but people call Mac the older one, and it makes her mad.

Simple enough? :ajsmug:

28198

Okay, what would you do in a situation where the only hopes for saving the world are turning into murderous villians, and you meet an already dying person who may help you find out what happened so you can COUNTER it? :unsuresweetie:

28388

trying anyway
sorry, i'm loyal good.

28388

trying anyway
sorry, i'm loyal good.

35514 I feel bad about writing that part too. Twi's my fav. :fluttershysad:

If you make Twilight evil I will rip your guts out. Period. Of course, since I said that you will make her evil.:facehoof:Stupid me. Well, I can still hope that Luna and Fluttershy will stop her from joining/getting to Celestia.

35523

Was already planning on it. :P

But don't worry! This story isn't over yet.

I thinks it's back on the right track but a little explanation of this war that's going on would be nice. (will wait pationtly for next chapter). :twilightsmile:

Thank you I now understand almost 100% of this story. I look forward to its continued development. :twilightsmile:

38938 Almost 100%? What do you not get? :rainbowderp:

i dont ynderstand any of this were did it start

39048
when I say I don't understand 100%, its because there are things that seem like they will be explained later, not because of plot hole, or obvious ones at least. Sorry for the confusion. :pinkiesmile:

39962
Thanks for the explanation. Two more chapters and you'll know it all. :pinkiehappy:

45747
Thats five push ups sir. (royal guard stares at you unblinking)

I can't wait for the next chapter!FABULOUS JOB ON THIS STORY!:raritystarry:

48790

44927

Wow. Two wet pony princesses.

I'm glad you liked it wet princess! No, that wet princess. Oh, wait. That one. ANYWAY.

I'm working on the next chapter, I'm just having difficulty on how the characters get to where I want them to go. :facehoof:

49269 I now changed my old account name to Princess of everything!

Sorry for the name confusion!:applejackconfused:

49290 Oh, you were the same person? Hah. :rainbowlaugh:

Thanks for the feedback!

So when do we get a new chapter? It's been a while and I'm curious as to what's going on.

66821

I can easily explain that in two words.

Ex and ams.

They're over and done now, and I'm working on the next Chapter. so read A Solar Flare in the meantime

Login or register to comment
Join our Patreon to remove these adverts!