• Member Since 14th Mar, 2013
  • offline last seen 1 hour ago


I am a proud Brony, a passionate lover of reading and writing, and I wish my fellow Bronies and my readers well

Comments ( 4505 )

This reminds me of the story I started writing recently.

Comment posted by Brimstonne deleted May 21st, 2014
Comment posted by Anyne deleted Oct 22nd, 2020
Comment posted by Wolven5 deleted May 28th, 2020
Comment posted by Anyne deleted Oct 22nd, 2020
Comment posted by mapu deleted May 28th, 2014

I'm surprised there are no comments.... This story is GREAT!
Please continue! :D

I quite like where the Story is going so far. Its interesting how your keeping the original story intact

4468987 Thank u very much.

The idea is to stay true to the story on a certain level while allowing the additional characters a share of the spotlight, along with some Xtra twists & turns and unexpected surprises

Comment posted by Old Diggy deleted Jun 19th, 2014
Comment posted by Wolven5 deleted Nov 20th, 2019

I found the time to read this chapter. I can say that the story needs some editing or an editor. I noticed many mistakes with the grammar and spelling.

Other than that, you're doing a pretty good job with including new story-lines to the original story.

Singing: Cause I got a golden ticket!

Comment posted by Wolven5 deleted Nov 8th, 2021
Comment posted by jifijesijiwofjwo deleted Sep 24th, 2023
Comment posted by Wolven5 deleted Sep 24th, 2023

Well you have Midnight as a senceable nice guy that like to help everyone how about a180 in his personality, he knows he basicly being a jerk but cant help it because of the posion joke. For Big mac sence he has a deep male voice give him a voice like Fluttershy and but overly talktive his compleate opposite. For Thunderlane overpowered flight one flap of the wings would send him a mile into the air at high speeds to fast to control safelyl and the force of the wing beats casue huge gusts of wind that can blow stuff or ponies aways a way.

I'm going with an internet rule here for all three. Rule 63. If it exists there will be a cross gender of it.

That or Midnight- return to human, Big Mac- possible gender swap to helium voice with loss of strength, and for Thunder- loss of wings to shooting lightning when he talks.

Those always happen i see it all the time my suggetions are more fun

Nicely done. I was wondering how you were going to prank Big Mac, Thunderlane, and Midnight. You pulled it off quite well.

“But… I could say the rainstorm got in the way… Ok, Thundy! A sleepover it is!”

I can't help but think that only a mare should call him that unless the stallion is teasing Thunderlane. Good story so far though.

I'm confused didn't he know about the show? So shouldn't he have at least a little knowledge about some of the going-on's?

Everypony helped out in cleaning Zecora’s home while Twilight took the time to write another letter.

But I thought they didn't barge in in this story?

4506991 He doesn't have every single detail comitted to memory plus the story is changing in ways he can't foresee

4507057 Didn't u read ir? Spike convinced Twi to knock and ask Zecora instead of confront her

4507127 Yes I did read it, and I know they didn't barge in. I meant, what mess would there be if they didn't barge in?
4507125 I know he doesn't but certain things just need a small reminder to remember at least the general idea. Like with Zecora and the Dragon Snoring.(I can't remember half of what happened in the last month, but give me a small reminder, like 'Dude we've gotta have another bonfire like we did a few weeks ago.' and I'll usually remember, for the time being, most of what happened. Just not the small details and the majority of the words said.)
Also it's nice to see that you're adding some parts that, while it's happening during the stories timeline, it's not actually part of the MLP:FIM story. (Sibling Revelry)

4507145 I imagine Zecora's place got a little messy preparing so much of the cure.

Midnight was more concerned with Twinken and sore at the others for their unpopular thoughts of Zecora

And Midnight, for the most part, just lets the events unfold so Twilight will learn the friendship lessons she's supposed to

That doesn't mean he can't
help out more

4520036 Do as what? Promested isn't a word

“I said, beat it!”

I was listening to this when reading that.

I never read the comics. They cost money, unlike these fan-fictions.

I can't wait for the wedding with the changelings! I like the changelings!

4523506 Well those won't b 4 a while. And I just found myself facing writer's block with th latest chapter, give it a read and tell me what u think plz

Well, it is a burden to have the answers and not be able to reveal them. In order for things to happen the way that we know the show, we have to keep that a secret.

I think that it was a both good, and bad thing that you sealed his memories. Good because he can't deal with the burden and he won't accidentally reveal his secrets. Bad because his memories are a part of who he is.

If you seal his memories, sure, you can give them back to him later. But he isn't the same person, or in this case, pony, that he is. Having the answers isn't a bad thing, as long as you use what you have for the right purpose.

4527294 Well not ALL of his memories were sealed, just his knowledge of the story's future, which duzent entirely apply since it's changed and is still changing

I like the new cover art. Finally, a shot of midnight! :D

I think the Winter Wrap-Up is before Hearths Warming to show that at the Very Least 1-2 Years Pass during the show, to help keep track of time passing.

4534247 I keep forgetting, cartoons, like Pinkie, never make sense...

4534582 I forget that all the time. I constantly see something that doesn't make sense and suddenly go off on a tangent, or I see something that happens that has an obvious solution and I go off on a tangent explaining the obvious route and questioning the one chosen... Usually to myself, and then I realize that it's a TV Show and I'm start questioning what little sanity I have left.

I gotta say this is an interesting story, though, its not the first story I've seen thats like this. But, I've got to say, I enjoyed yours more, since there aren't all sorts of sexual references. :pinkiehappy:

Keep up the good writing!

4553106 I might add sex but as separate chapters

I do intend to give this story some romance but not for a while

As long as you're just mentioning it in passing, and not putting clop scenes in the main story, you won't lose me as a follower

“Exactly, you two” Celestia agreed with her student and her student’s student before re-addressing the two athletes, “Now, unfortunately as the two of you were so busy tricking each other instead of shaking down leaves, many of the lovely trees of Equestria are still covered.”

That's one part I never understood, it's 2 out of I don't know how many that were running and just because those 2 were tricking each other instead of shaking down leaves there's suddenly a bunch of leaves that didn't get knocked down, aaaanndd than I remember I'm trying to make sense out of a cartoon.

4554242 Well as Discord would say, "What fun is there in making sense?":derpytongue2:

Ah, Discord. Hurry up and get through season 1 so we can see our favorite draquoniqus in action. That being said, there wasn't much of a change in this chapter. Hopefully something really different happens next chapter.

4554483 I'm afraid Discord's future (in this story) is not so bright...

4554507 Well, this is the story retold, and soon it's gonna start deviating further from the original

I know, I know, but still, Discord should be present, at least for the 2-part season opener for season 2. You don't necessarily have to reform him in season 3.

4554521 Oh Discord will get his debut ...He just won't survive it

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