The Wheel and the Butterfly
A Dan X Pinkie Pie saga
Part 10 Dan & Pinkie Vs. Interspecies Relationship
Chapter 82 Dan Vs. Heat
-ooooooo-
“You really think you can alter her DNA?” Twilight asked.
“Sure!” Elise replied. “I’ve made machines that have done that before…”
Chris cocked an eyebrow. “Yeah, but they always made monsters,” he pointed out.
“I’m sure I can figure out and tweak some that will almost definitely, probably not make her into a giant monster,” Elise assured.
“Hmmmm…” Twilight said as she rubbed her chin.
“You seem unsure,” Elise said.
“Oh, it’s not that I doubt your expertise here, but in addition to being from a whole another dimension, Pinkie’s sort of an anomaly even by pony standards,” Twilight pointed out.
“That’s a fair point,” Elise replied, “well, I’ll get DNA sample and take a look at it before we try anything drastic.”
Twilight nodded, “Sounds perfectly sensible to me.”
The group paused as they heard the sound of a loud crash from the bathroom.
“I NEED AN ADULT!” Dan shouted.
“I am an adult!” Pinkie replied cheerily.
“I NEED A HUMAN ADULT OR MAGIC PURPLE ALICORN ADULT!”
“They can wait their turn!” Pinkie said.
“Sounds like Dan is going to beat you to the DNA sample,” Twilight joked.
Elise giggled.
“Uh, shouldn’t we help him?” Chris asked.
“I’m sure he’s fine,” Elise said.
Twilight nodded in agreement.
“In case anyone was wondering, I’M NOT FINE!” Dan shouted.
“You will be when you stop struggling~!” Pinkie sang out.
Chris shot Elise and Twilight a grumpy bemused expression and motioned towards the bathroom door.
Twilight sighed, “Do we have to?”
Chris cocked an eyebrow, “You two wouldn’t hesitate if the roles were reversed…”
“Stop right there, mister!” Elise said in a mildly irritated voice. “I see what you’re trying to do, but it’s not because Dan’s a guy that we’re hesitating.”
Twilight nodded, “It’s because he’s Dan.”
“See!” Elise said motioning to Twilight, “She gets it!”
Chris sighed, “Look, I’m sure Dan has all done lists and lists of things to annoy all of use and he can use a little karmic retribution, but do you really think he deserves it in the form of his recently transformed girlfriend, whom he loves with all his heart, losing control of herself and forcing herself on him?”
Twilight pursed her lips and paused, “Wow… I see why you’re his best friend… I actually kinda feel like a real jerk here…” she admitted.
Elise sighed, “Yeah… me too… Alright let’s go save the little gremlin.”
“She’s almost through my shirt!” Dan informed.
“Wellf, I woufdn’t haff twwo chewf i’ off if ywou woul’ jwust twake iwt off!” Pinkie said in a muffled voice.
“WE’RE WORKING ON IT!” Chris yelled.
“Elise, Chris,” Twilight barked out, “I need you two to bring the mirror to where I can see Pinkie.”
Elise looked at Chris, “Alright, let’s grab it and bring to the door, I can get the door open easily enough.”
Chris nodded, “Alright, but that thing is really heavy…”
Elise and Chris ran over the mirror and grabbed either side of it, they both grunted as the picked it up.
“Wow… you weren’t kidding…” Elise said.
“You’re lucky we only need to get it across the room,” Chris replied.
“She’s done with my shirt, guys!” Dan called out. “And she apparently possess freaky pony strength,” he added.
“Yeah… Pinkie’s strength probably increased now that she’s an earth pony again…” Twilight mused.
Chris and Elise sat the mirror down at entrance to the bedroom as Elise leaned in front of the bathroom door and produced a series of thin metal tools from her pockets. She grabbed one and shoved it into the lock.
“You carry lock picks with you?” Chris asked.
“… You’re actually surprised?!” Elise replied as she raised an eyebrow at her husband.
“Touché …”
Elise added another tool and soon the door was unlocked and opened.
Red faced, and irritated looking with a great deal of his shirt chewed away, Dan stared upside down from the floor at his rescuers. “Took you long enough, I’m lucky she can’t work a zipper with her hooves and my jeans are harder to chew through than my shirt.”
Pinkie had clamped on to Dan’s jean’s waist band and pulled at it with all her might.
“Uh, Sparkler,” Dan began, “could you…?”
Twilight swallowed, “Maybe she’ll wear herself out…”
“Wfill noft!” Pinkie said through a mouth full of jean.
“NOW, TWILIGHT!” Dan shouted.
“Alright, alright!” Twilight shouted as a purple beam shot from her horn into her side of the mirror, and then out the other side into Pinkie.
Pinkie’s eyes went wide as the beam hit. She immediately loosened her grip on Dan’s pants. She let out a loud, low moan as her eyes rolled back in her head as her eyelids began rapidly twitching as an awkward happy smile grew on her face.
Dan glanced at Pinkie and then back at Twilight with a confused expression, “Looks like your magic feels pretty nice.”
Twilight sighed as her face flushed crimson, “Let’s just say euphoria is a side effect of this particular spell.”
“You’re telling me…” Dan said as Pinkie allowed herself to fall unto Dan’s bare chest with a content smile on her face. “Anyhow, thanks Sparkler…”
“Sure…” Twilight said meekly.
“Hey, I picked the lock,” Elise pointed out.
“That door, is barely a step up from paper mache,” Dan pointed out, “it would have fell apart if you sneezed too hard on it.”
“Catch me saving you from your girlfriend again,” Elise muttered under her breath.
Dan shot Pinkie a quizzical look as the pink pony began to enthusiastically nuzzle his bare chest, but decided to continue taking out his pound of flesh out of his friends. He looked at Chris and narrowed his eyes, “Well, what did you do?”
“I helped carry the mirror,” Chris replied.
Dan rolled his eyes. “Thanks, uselesser,” he said in a sarcastic tone.
“Aaaand, I actually convinced Elise and Twilight you were worth saving,” Chris added.
Dan glowered at Elise and Twilight, “And why was there room for questions here?”
Twilight pursed her lips, “Sorry Dan, you’re right, it wasn’t right of us to just leave you like that when you needed help.”
Satisfied, Dan turned to Elise who merely glared down at Dan.
“Well?!” Dan demanded.
“I’m no longer convinced you were worth saving,” Elise informed.
Dan narrowed his eyes, “And you wonder why I call you, ‘cow’.”
“Oh, that’s it, you’re a dead man!”
Pinkie’s focused warning eyes on Elise, “HISSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!”
“Uh… or not…” Elise said as she observed her friend’s unusual response.
Satisfied, Pinkie returned to nuzzling Dan.
“…Did Pinkie just hiss?!” Chris asked.
Twilight sighed, “Mating season can get a little weird, especially for Ponyville ponies.”
“Why’s that?” Elsie asked.
“The ratio between females and males is somewhat weighted towards the female end in Equestria,” Twilight explained, “but Ponyville has the most unbalanced ratio out of any city.”
“Ah,” Elise said, “so Pinkie is…”
“Going to be very hard to pry away from Dan until we sort this all out…”
“Does this weirdness explain this non-stop nuzzling she’s doing to my chest?” Dan asked as he cocked an eye at his girlfriend.
Twilight’s cheeks flushed crimson, “Erm… no… that’s probably… afterglow…” she said sheepishly.
Dan’s eye began to twitch as confusion and anger vied for control of his features, “WHAT!? YOU MEAN TO TELL ME YOUR SPELL…”
“PLEASE, can we not talk about the particulars of that spell, I’m embarrassed enough as it is…” Twilight said.
“What happened to all that talk about ‘natural desires’?!” Dan demanded.
“Well, this is a tad personal for me…” Twilight replied as she avoided Dan’s icy glare.
“Personal for you?! She’s my girlfriend!”
“Hey!” Twilight protested as she turned to Dan and met is gaze with irritated eyes. “Pinkie’s one of my best friend and I only used it to save you! How do you think I feel?! How would you feel if you had to blast Chris with magic ‘feel good’ beams to keep him from going crazy on Elise?”
The color drained from Dan’s face.
“All in favor or not hearing the answer to that question ever,” Chris said raising his hand.
Dan and Elise raised their hands. “Aye,” they said in unison.
Elise shook her head. “Welp, I just watched an alicorn princess blast my pony best friend with magic, ‘feel good’ beams so she wouldn’t date rape her boyfriend. My childhood innocence is officially dead,” she announced.
Chris paused and glanced to the side as he thought about this. “…You kill people for a living,” he reminded.
“Not all the time!” Elise replied.
“Yeah,” Dan chimed in, “sometimes she creates things that are used to kill people…”
Elise narrowed her eyes at Dan, “Dan,” she began in an angry tone, “I’m going to…”
A low pitched growl emitted from Pinkie, “Grrrrrrr…”
Elise sighed, “…figure out a way to transport you, Pinkie, and the mirror to our house.”
“What’s wrong with here?” Dan enquired.
Elise cocked an eyebrow at Dan, “Seriously? I have none of my equipment, and there are a grand total of three rooms in this apartment… Also, it’s an apartment, not exactly the sort of place you conduct crazy and groundbreaking scientific experiments, like the ones that hopefully end in a pony from another dimension being transformed into a human.”
“Our neighbor does it!” Dan pointed out.
“And...?” Elise replied.
“Uh… they usually end in giant and dangerous radioactive beasts attacking the complex…” Dan said weakly.
Elise nodded, “There you go.”
“I understand, Elise,” Twilight said, “I wouldn’t be able to do much in your situation either.”
Dan sighed, “Fine, you go and Chris can…”
“I’m going with Elise,” Chris announced.
“WHAT?!” Dan cried, “But I need you to restrain Pinkie…”
“Yeah, that’s not going to work,” Chris said.
Dan furrowed his brow at his tall friend, “And why’s that.”
Chris walked behind the couple still on the bathroom floor. He bent down to pick up Pinkie. As he did, the pink pony wrapped her arms and legs tightly around Dan. Chris grunted and strained to raise both pony and the now attached man.
Chris let go, stood up, and motioned to Pinkie.
Dan sighed, “Fine, you’re excused.” He leaned his head back so he was once again looking upside down at Twilight. “Looks like it’s just us three for a bit.”
Twilight cringed.
“I’m really sorry, Twilight…” Elise offered.
“It’s alright Elise, I understand,” Twilight sighed out. “I just wish we could have met under better circumstances.”
Elise chuckled, “Not as much as me.”
The two smiled at each other through the mirror.
“Elise, you can take a picture of Too Purple and make a creepy shrine to her later,” Dan said. “I would very much like a sane…”
Twilight, Chris, and Elise all cocked an eyebrow and stared at Dan.
“…relatively speaking,” Dan qualified in a mildly irritated tone, “girlfriend again.”
“Alright Dan,” Elise said, “but only because I’m starting to want Pinkie back to normal, too… especially if she’s going to be this weird when she’s a pony.”
Twilight shrugged, “It comes and goes through the mating months.”
Elise’s expression suddenly turned unsure.
“Sparkler? Not helping…” Dan stated.
“Er, sorry… Anyhow, Pinkie can’t go outside like this and was literally climbing the walls yesterday she was so stressed out…” Twilight pointed out.
Pinkie took a quick break from her nuzzling to perk her head up and nod it up and down vigorously.
Elise sighed, “Alright… come on Chris, we’ll need to get something big enough to transport the mirror safely. Uh… good luck Twilight.” Elise offered.
Twilight nodded, “Thanks…”
“See you two soon,” Elise said.
“Yeah, see you soon,” Chris said.
“Bye-bye!” Pinkie said cheerfully.
“Yeah, whatever…” Dan said.
Elise and Chris walked towards the apartment door and left.
“Sooo…” Pinkie cooed, “looks like we’re alone now.”
“Uh, Pinkie?” Twilight said, “I’m still here.”
Pinkie looked up and gave her friend a crazed grin, “I meant the three of us. I mean… you already are a participant here…”
Twilight’s face turned a luminescent shade of red.
Dan gulped and looked at Twilight, “Uh… so when you said mating season could get a bit weird…”
“Well… erm… it depends from mare to mare,” Twilight said, “but uh… sharing isn’t uncommon if a mare isn’t so keen on arguing or fighting other mares…”
“…You ponies are pretty messed up,” Dan commented.
“Hey! Why don’t you try living in a society that goes all cattywampus for a few weeks out of the year and see how judgmental you are then!”
“Less angry shouting more in the throes of passion shouting, please!” Pinkie said cheerfully.
Dan grimaced as he pressed his head against the floor in a vain attempt to get further away from Pinkie as she leaned her muzzle closer to him.
“Sniff…sniff… You smell nice…” Pinkie said.
“So I’ve been told…” Dan said to Pinkie. He looked back up at Twilight. “Twilight, could you…” Dan began.
Twilight cocked an eye, “Oh, so now you want me to blast her.”
Pinkie began to nibble at Dan’s neck.
“I’ve weighed the pros and cons here and decided I really don’t want this memory burned upon my psyche.”
Pinkie glanced up at Twilight with a mad glint in her eyes, “Come on Twilight! Blast me! It’s fuuuuuuun~!”
Twilight gulped, “I’m not sure I can do this… I mean… she’s into it…”
“Not as into it as Dan’s about to be~!” Pinkie sang out.
Dan winced. “Shoot her!” he pleaded.
“But…”
“Shooooooooot herrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!”
Twilight’s horn glowed purple as and another beam shot from it and threw the mirrior into Pinkie.
Pinkie placed her forehooves on Dan’s chest and began to moan and pant as her eyes glazed over slightly.
Dan let out a sigh of relief, “Thanks, Twilight.”
Twilight sighed, “You’re welcome…” she said meekly.
Pinkie began to giggle in a much lower, throatier tone than usual, “Hehehehehe….The felt good…”
Dan and Twilight stared at the pink mare with concern as Pinkie’s toothy grin widened, adding to the mare’s already crazed look.
Pinkie looked down at Dan, “Your turn~!”
“Uh, Twilight? I don’t think it’s stopping her,” Dan said.
“I noticed,” Twilight replied.
“Why isn’t it working?!” Dan cried.
“It’s not like I’ve used it on anypony else before!” Twilight cried.
Pinkie shimmed down Dan’s body a bit and eyed the button to his jeans. “You know...” she purred, “my hooves aren’t working here, but I know something that miiight~!”
Dan gulped as Pinkie leaned her face down to his jeans button and wrapped her teeth around it. He looked back up at Twilight with a panicked, pleading look in his eyes, “I’m open to suggestions!”
“Uh… Plan ‘B’?” Twilight suggested.
“…Do we have anything between A and B?” Dan asked.
Pinkie yanked her head back quickly, Dan felt his jeans tug up slightly before they quickly flew to the ground. Pinkie spat out the metal button. “Alright, now for the zipper…”
“There is no letter between A and B!” Twilight cried.
Dan’s blood ran cold as he heard the sound of his zipper being undone, “Please! Try something! Anything!”
Twilight bit her lower lip, “Uh…erm… I GOT IT!” Her horn glowed purple once more and another beam excited the mirror and hit Pinkie.
Pinkie shot up once again. This time her eyes rolled back in her head and she collapsed into a heap on top of Dan. She began to snore gently as she rested her head on his chest.
Dan breathed a sigh of relief, “Thanks…” he said, “what was that?”
“Sleep spell…” Twilight informed.
Dan’s eye twitched, “… Wait… you had a sleep spell the ENTIRE time and instead you opted for your filthy, master…”
“It works a lot better in conjunction with the first spell,” Twilight interrupted. “In fact, the sleep spell pretty much doesn’t work at all on mares in heat otherwise…”
Dan raised an eyebrow, “And by mares, you mean…”
Twilight sighed, “I mean ‘me’…”
Dan lowered his eyelids slightly “You’ve had a lot of lonely nights, haven’t you Sparkles?”
Twilight shot a glare at Dan, “Hey! I’m willing to bet a whole bag of bits that you haven’t exactly spent a lot of time with a special someone, either!”
Dan glowered at Twilight in response.
The two avoided eye contact and shared an uncomfortable silence as they prepared for what was certainly going to be an unpleasant day full of awkward moments between the two of them.
Awesome chapted.
3948451 Seconded. "Feel Good beams."
*snicker*
I wonder how long it's going to be before Twilight realizes that Discord was the one to make Pinkie human in the first place, and could do it again if asked nicely...
Dab?
Surely it's Dan.
Also
Surely it's Jeans
Please don't hate me :)
3948796 I'm wondering why they didn't go to him first. In fact where is discord. I dont remember him when everypony was Breaking into the Library.
3948934 I dare say it's another case of Twilight NOT thinking of Discord as a possible solution to a problem. She's so used to him being the problem after all...
Thank god for magic I was starting to worry
Another great line for the series...
You are welcome for the help my good sir, haven't 'helped' thus much since Lunar Hill on Smackjeeves years ago, if you have read it, I was LAKIE_DA_HEDGEFROG, if you haven't... go read all 3000 pages NAO!!
this was great there is no better way to spend my time
I need to get Pinkie a muzzle Dan,
Im wondering how long before Pinkie remembers, canon, that her tongue, mane, and tail are extendable, and prehensile, and very strong, and can do alllll sorts of amazing, and very delicate things.
Yeah, I wonder what Dan would prefer, Pinkie the human with that mouth and those fingers, or Pinkie the Maneiac.
3948912
Fixed these both! Thank you!
3936907
3948934
3948796
As x-Kiryu-x gathered, she began to consider Discord.
And then Dan derailed her train of thought with an angry shout.
I estimate about 30 minutes before that sleep spell wears off...then it's gonna get weird again!
Also: ORGASM BEAM!
Twi might have just caused the first inter-dimensionally induce orgasm not caused by ironic coincidence within a narrative structure.
Now I wonder what the sexual assault laws are like in Equestira. This world just gets darker and darker.
Next Chpt: Dan goes with 'Plan B' possible? please
Wouldent it be hilarious if pinkie gets addicted to twilights spell even when she turns human again?
Shouldn't that be ether "those questions" or "that question" instead? I ask because it just doesn't sound right as is.
3954518
Actully, I need to drop the 's' here. Thanks!
You should shoot Dan with the beam. You know, for science
3957613 you monster. XD i finished your GLaDOS quote
yeah... that'll happen. Did I mention my mixed feelings about the Internet already?
Wow, that picture made me almost sympathetic to Twilight's position. Hmm... NAH!
4519015 Just warning you now, good sir. I happen to be in love with a Twilight, and I have air powers. Don't piss me off. Now then, carry on.
well, I’ll get DNA sample
Pinkie’s one of my best friend
Twilight’s horn glowed purple as and another beam shot from it and threw the mirrior into Pinkie
1. Well, I'll get the DNA sample.
2. Friends.
3. Through., Mirror.
I'm gradually getting to the end. I think I can see it... another 60 chapters to go. Sigh... This makes me wish I was in their world...
Well that happened.
4401764 Ph! Try, as a young innocent who didn't even know this site had a Mature tag stumbling upon "Beating the Heat" and "120 Days of Blueblood" in quick succession, when you know almost nothing about sex, then, Elise, you can complain.
Why does this chapter remind me of a fic under comedy in the ButtonBelle group.
Great... now I want to see a pony dan
3949791
Gee, why does that sound familiar?
...Riiiiight.
Why has nobody pointed out the great Jurrasic Park quote here?
6390339 i'd say "clever girl" but i don't know who here is a girl
I nearly spewed my chili I was laughing so hard at that line.
Hahahahahahah! That ending pic was great.
Wait...why did they have to move the mirror? Couldn't Twilight have just told Elise to pull out a compact mirror and linked the communication to that? It's my understanding that the actual mirror is unimportant, as long as there's a reflective surface to lock onto.
8206938 That's true and it's been a LONG while since I wrote this, but I think them moving the mirror that's already setup was probably easier than Twilight asking them to produce another mirror, which she had no way of knowing if they had one on hand, and then playing extradimensional rabbit-ears with her magic.
8207170
And here I was ready to shrug it off as "Stressed Twilight is forgetful and author needed an excuse to leave Dan, Pinkie, and Twilight alone for a chapter".
8207189 That's probably also a factor. I'd kinda considered it when I typed up the previous response.
I will get at least this made into a comic.
8507182
Please do that would be epic!
Why did Elise have to pick the lock on the door? Pinkie switched the doorknob around to trap Dan.
Yep....no matter how many times I see this line in a story, it’s still funny as hell.
And....Twilight has an orgasm beam. Orgazmo would be proud.
8796798
Because they didn't know maybe?
Oh, yes!
Fantastic Jurassic Park reference there.