The Wheel and the Butterfly
A Dan X Pinkie Pie saga
Part 5 Pinkie Vs. Balance
Epilogue
****
“FREAK TORNADO TEARING THROUGH L.A.!” Pinkie screamed, clad in her white shirt, black vest, cut off jean shorts, and rainbow leg warmers.
“AHHHHHHHHHHHH!” Dan responded from the bed, falling off of it.
‘THUMP’
Dan groggily lifted his boxer clad body off the ground and rubbed his head. “Uhh…situation ‘T’…’ornado’…” He muttered. “I’ll get my keys.” He yawned out
Pinkie leaned down close to Dan and continued to scream. “ALSO THE TORNADO HAS PICKED UP SHARKS FROM THE OCEAN AND IS NOW A LETHAL WHIRLWIND OF CHOMPY DEATH SWEEPING UP AND BITING EVERYTHING IT COMES ACROSS!”
“GAH!” Dan rubbed his ear. “I’m right here…wait…Did you just reference a Syfy original movie? How DARE you bring that filth into this…”
“SHARKANDOS CAN STRIKE AT ANYTIME OR ANYPLACE, DAN!” Pinkie insisted, putting her hands around Dan’s bare shoulders and shaking him. “Assuming such places have sharks within convent pickup distance of tornados.” She added, raising an index finger informatively.
Dan sighed. “Can I at least put clothes on?”
“THERE’S NO TIME! GRAB MR. MUMBLES AND YOUR KEYS! I’LL GRAB THE SPEAR-GUN!”
“STOP SHOUTING AT ME! I’m going, I’m going…” Dan insisted.
“Merow?” Mr. Mumbles called out.
Dan bent down and held out his hand, cringing as the cat clawed her way up his bare arm, perching on his shoulder.
He trudged over to his dresser and grabbed his wallet and keys, as a pink blur zoomed past him and out the bedroom. Dan exited the room with cat, keys, and wallet in tow and continued his slow plodding towards the open apartment door.
“Get the car! Get the car! GETTHECAR! CAR, CAR, CAR, CARCARCARCARCARCARCAR!” Pinkie commanded, energetically hopping up and down on the walkway holding a spear gun in one hand and a quiver of spears in the other.
“Alright! Alright! Hold your horses…or ponies…whatever…” Dan mumbled as he trudged outside, down the walkway, and down the stairs to the vehicle.
Dan got in the car, letting Mr. Mumbles jump into the backseat. He noted Pinkie had already neatly piled clothing for him next to his shoes. On top of the small clothing pile rested a clipboard, sheet of paper, and pen which Dan grabbed. He leaned over to roll down the passenger side window, buckled up, started the car and moved it into position.
No sooner than the car was under the walkway then Pinkie appeared feet first and landed in the car seat as if she was poured into the car from the walkway above, holding the spear gun and quiver in one of her arms.
Pinkie quickly buckled her seat belt. “How’d I do?! How’d I do?! Huh? Huh?! Tell me! TELL ME! TELL ME!”
“Uhhh…” Dan looked down at his clipboard and jotted a few things down. “Awesome. A+” He answered simply.
“Yippy-skippy!” Pinkie exclaimed throwing her hands into the air, nearly clocking Dan in the process and hitting them against the car ceiling. “OW!” Pinkie said, shaking her hands slightly.
Dan wrinkled his brow at the energetic, giddy girl sitting across from him. “What’s with you? You seem even more hyperactive than usual…Are you on drugs?” Dan asked with a raised eyebrow.
“I dranky a coupley energy drinkies to improvey my speedy!” Pinkie said with, huge, wide eyes, and a giant grin. She leaned down and fetched a reusable, plastic, grocery bag from the car floor in front of her that was bulging with cylindrical shaped cans. “Want one?!”
Dan yawned again. “Sure, thanks”. He said as Pinkie quickly buried her arm into the bag, and pulled out a bright, orange can, handing it to Dan. He opened the can and took a swing. “Where to?”
“Ooo! Ooo! Ooo! Ooo! Let’s drive to San Diego and free all the animals from the animal prison!” Pinkie said excitedly.
Dan crinkled his brow at Pinkie. “You mean ‘zoo’?”
Pinkie smiled and waved dismissively, “Whatever! I just want to keep humanity on its toesies!”
Dan thought about this for a second and took another swig of his drink. “Too eco-terrorist for the middle of the night.” He said shaking his head.
“Okaaaaaaaay…” Pinkie cooed. “Let’s steal honey from bees and keep Mother Nature on her toesies!” She paused and added. “I was kinda bummed that it was cloudy yesterday.”
Dan paused and raised an eyebrow. “Did you bring the suits?”
Pinkie grinned wide. “They’re in the trunk!”
Dan smiled, and put the car into drive, pulling out into the street. “Us two against the world, eh?”
Pinkie leaned over the transmission hump to wrap an arm around Dan’s shoulders and give him a hug, resting her head on his shoulder. “I wouldn’t have it any other way.” She said with a content smile.
The red hatchback drove off into the night towards sticky mayhem.
End Part 5
Thanks for reading!
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This is so cute, and disturbing, but cute nonetheless
It's terrifying but also incredibly adorable. I can't wait to see what you come up with next!
Part of me appreciates the relationship these two are building, from strangers to close friends (maybe more). The other part of me is screaming "KISS ALREADY!"
I keep commenting this, but I can't wait to see what happens next
3380636
Do you mean cutsturbing?
Oh wait, diturbute! No, Discuteing!
You referenced Sharknado.
Sweet Jesus. Let the apocalypse begin. Pinkie Pie drank energy drinks again. Its a Class 5 extinction event.
How about yes? Yeeees, yes should do nicely.
This has to be the sweetest story about Burglary, Mahem, Chaos and setting people on fire that I have ever read!
I may cry.
I am so glad that I found this story, its.... glorious. I honestly haven't laughed this hard in ages.
Lite-version corrections for mini-chapter.
cutoff
boxer-clad
he
Comma.
he yawned.
sharknados
tornados,” she
Delete this comma.
A+,” he
Comma after 'exclaimed'.
Delete ALL of these commas.
And these too.
thanks,” he
Delete these commas.
night,” he said,
Comma after 'added'.
"Get the car! Get the car! Get the car! Car, car, car, carcarcarcarcarcar!"
Gotta go faster, faster, fasterfasterfaster~
4445005 Thank you for referencing THE most AWESOME show in the history of man, woman, and hedgehog-kind.
3382310 skip to chapter seven buddy.
4541895 Didja mean 37? Cause 7 was a LOOOONG time ago
(Looks around) Can I say it? Yes? Good. I LIKE THIS FIC! ANOTHER! (Throws tablet down, tablet breaks) Uh, oops....
Oh, and I'm 25% percent through!
4551911
Apparently I listened.
I need to add another arc to that actually...
Ijustdranksevenofthosethingies!!!!!!
Also, why did you make so many chapters?
4571771
Because apparently I have a lot of story to tell with these two.
4571771 Because it's good. That's like asking why Blackwing made Griffin the Griffin so long and made a sequel. Or why Man of War is so long. Or why Coal Buck's My Second Life was so long before it got removed but it wasn't even 1/10 of the way done. (seriously! 250 something chapters and wasn't even a tenth of the way done! That's like (does quick math in head) 2,500 chapters! WTF?!?!
4586802 You, my friend, have awesome taste.
I'm loving this so far. It's like a lighter version of the Joker and Harley Quiin
Our two anti-heroes. How sweet.
Mother of all that is Pony, how am I calling Pinkie Pie an anti-hero?!
Oh yeah, this is a Dan Vs. crossover we're talking about here. Of course Pinkie Pie would be an anti-hero.
5072179 I feel EXTREMELY stupid right now. I have been reading this for the past while now and it takes you saying this to figure out its a crossover of something. So what is Dan v.s...whatever the show/series/movie/book/thing anyway? I have never heard of it.
5465978
A popular show in the states. Here is a link.
Awww!
LOL, dat sharknado reference
Sticky mayhem! STICKY MAYHEM! WOO HOO!
pixelpapercraft.com/files/1387256501966.png
Sharknado... oh lord I watched that, it was so terrible it was actually good XD
Nice work on this dude, nice work.
I know it's like, years too late to say anything, but stimulants have inverse effects on hyperactives. An energy drink would make Pinkie drowsy, and two would make her crash.
9178952
And I know I'M a few years late to say this but Pinkie Pie kinda works of 'Stephen King's IT' logic
So long as she believes it'd work a certain way, that's the way it'll work regardless (and sometimes in spite of) science
10601065
I'm also a bit late to the party, but the caffeine working opposite on hyperactives is only really true for those that way for medical reasons. It has something to do with the way the body and mind process caffeine. A cup of coffee will still set off a hyperactive five year old if they aren't add or ADHD or some other such thing.
I know it worked well on me before I built up my tolerance to caffeine.