The Wheel and the Butterfly
A Dan X Pinkie Pie saga
Part 9 Dan Vs. The Order Keepers
Chapter 70: Dan Vs. TOK King
-ooooooo-
Doing the music thing if you're interested. Google Docs version here.
-ooooooo-
Change.
Change is the enemy of order, and order is all.
Change disrupts, change leads to chaos.
That is why change must be stomped out as quickly as possible.
The Warper was change. Her abilities brought unpredictability to her world.
Some would argue not much, but if left unchecked, she could have change far, far too much.
Then she got away.
Then she brought change to another world.
When we reclaimed her, she brought change here.
Change that would prove catastrophic.
Change that would damage, destroy, and even kill.
Beings that had existed for eons and eons…now silenced forever.
All because change had come into this world.
I had miscalculated twice already because of change.
First, I allowed change to take hold for too long, unabated. We are beings waiting and observing, after all, and we are not always quick to action.
However, change forced action, and action I took.
The energy I released should have been just enough to end change, to kill him…
But he somehow bent enough of the Nexus to his will enough to survive.
And now I’m corporeal again channeling energy simply to keep myself upright.
I am ruler of this place, complete and absolute.
I won’t make the same mistake twice…
“Hey! Talk, dark, and boring!” Dan called as he pointed his baseball bat at the tall, gaunt, crowned figure. “Are we gonna fight, or are you just gonna stand there and hope Pinkie and I die of old age?”
The king of The Order Keepers narrowed his eyes at Dan.
“Dan, don’t tick off the king of the cloudy thingies…” Pinkie whispered.
“What?! He shot me with an energy bolt in the CHEST!” Dan yelled at the now straight-haired pony. “I can’t believe you’re not upset about that!”
“Normally I’d be pretty dang ticked…or a complete, crying-wying mess like I was just a bit ago...Right now? I just want to go home…”
“And we will!” Dan insisted. “But first I need to bludgeon the ugly alien’s skull in.”
Pinkie glanced out, the portal was just a short sprint away.
Well, it’s high up…but I’m an excellent jumper…
…Oh, I hope Dan isn’t too mad about this…
--♫
The grim king positioned his hands in front of his chest and curled his fingers into claws. Azure bolts of energy began to crackle between them.
Dan grinned wickedly and raised his bat. “It’s about time you got serious…”
“This time, you will die!” The crowned figure informed.
“We’ll see aboutWHOA…Pinkie what are you..?”
Pinkie quickly placed her head in between Dan’s legs and lifted the short man onto her back. “Sorry, Dan!” She began bounding at a rapid pace towards the exit. “I’ll make it up to you!
--♫
Dan held fast to Pinkie’s straight mane. “You better, I expect plenty of human smoochees when we get home!”
--♫
The grim king fired a wild shot of energy at Pinkie, missing as she continued to bound up and down towards her destination. “STOP THEM!” he commanded.
--♫
His subject’s obeyed, drifting close enough to Dan and Pinkie to rematerialize. Though, this time with an aura of dark blue light that seemed to help them keep their balance.
--♫
Dan swung wildly at the tall figures, swatting away limbs as they frantically dove at the pink pony and heated human.
The grim king raised a palm, and as he did, the portal to Dan’s and Pinkie’s world began to float up.
Pinkie leaped.
“Oh, COME ON!” The Pink mare exclaimed as her target floating up and away.
She hit the ground on all fours.
Dan swung a leg over the side of Pinkie and stepped onto the ground.
“Dan, what…”
“We tried it your way…Now we try it my way…” Dan said as he grinned evilly once more and brandished his bat. He charged into the shambling horde of order keepers.
--♫
Dan closed into swinging distance and swung his bat up…
--♫
‘CRACK!’
…and connected with the chin of an Order Keeper, causing its head to snap back and the air to pulsate again.
--♫
Dan began to deliver blow after blow into his foes, smiling madly the entire time as Order Keepers fell around him.
--♫
Being able to stand seemed to offer little help to The Order Keepers, who still easily lost their balance and seemed to have little in the way to attack or defend themselves with.
--♫
‘CRACK!’
Another of The Order Keeper’s fell, and the ether rippled once again.
--♫
“MuaHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!” Dan cackled madly as his foes fell under his bat, each swing brining another to the ground, or to its death.
The grim king grimaced angrily at the scene in front of him.
I can’t destroy him like this…but perhaps…
He turned from Dan’s melee of violence and began walking away.
--♫
“Dan! STOP! We just need to get out of here!” Pinkie pleaded.
--♫
“Grrrrrrr!” Pinkie growled out in frustration. “I REALLY DON’T WANT TO BE STUCK HERE!” She shouted.
--♫
“THEN MAYBE YOU SHOULD HELP ME OUT!” Dan cried back.
--♫
“WITH WHAT?!” Pinkie screamed back, raising her straight mane again. “MY MANES ALL SAD AGAIN!”
--♫
Dan sighed and rushed back to Pinkie. “You are the neediest pony girlfriend ever!”
--♫
“I’M SORRY I’M NOT USED TO BEING KIDNAPPED!”
--♫
Dan quickly leaned down, threw his arms around Pinkie’s neck and planted another kiss on her furry lips.
--♫
‘fffeeeeeeEEEEEEEEEEEEE!’
Pinkie’s hair immediately reflated to its normal, curly mass and the mare grinned wild and madly.
--♫
Dan wiped the fur from his mouth. “Now help me kill these things!”
Pinkie pulled her pink crowbar from her mane. “Okie-dokie-lokie!”
--♫
Dan charged once more as Pinkie bounded next to him, her crowbar gripped tightly in her mouth as she wore a happy expression.
--♫
Dan once again began randomly budging targets that fell under his might.
--♫
Pinkie leapt high into the air and brought her weight and crowbar down on the head of an Order Keeper with a loud ‘THRAWK!’ The air pulsated again in response.
--♫
The two continued to swat at limbs, bludgeon torsos, and strike at heads as their foes swarmed around them.
--♫
The two backed into each other as their available room began to shrink.
--♫
Pinkie giggled and quickly pulled her crowbar out of her mouth. “Heheh…You and me against the universe, huh?”
--♫
Dan took a hard swing into an Order Keeper. “Unf…Wouldn’t have it any other way!” He said with a mad grin.
“Well, you may want to duck and cover…” Pinkie began.
--♫
“…’Cause I brought some friends.”
--♫
Dan knew better than to question Pinkie, and did as she suggested.
--♫
Pinkie began to vigorously shake her mane, as she did, dozens of angry, hissing, and rattling snakes flew out in all directions. The snakes sank fangs into startled and fearful figures who attempted to back away under the slithering assault in a panic.
Dan stared wide eyed at the den of snakes Pinkie had unleashed. “I THOUGHT YOU MADE UP THAT THING WITH THE SNAKES!” Dan shouted, raising his palms up in confusion.
“I THOUGHT I DID TO, BUT THEN YOU HAD TO GET THAT MONGOOSE!” Pinkie shouted back, raising her hooves up in confusion.
“I MADE THAT UP!” Dan explained.
“WHY WOULD YOU LIE TO ME?!” Pinkie demanded.
“I WAS TRYING TO GET INTO YOUR PANTS…” Dan paused and quickly added, “…ROMANTICALLY!”
“Oh…” Pinkie replied tapping a forehoof to her chin. “Good job!” She exclaimed happily.
--♫
“THIS ENDS NOW!” A booming voice called from high above the couple.
The two stared up into the angry, glowing eyes of The Order Keeper King, once again floating in the air with a halo above his eyes.
Suddenly, the ground around Pinkie and Dan jutted towards them in large, diagonal, stone beams that trapped them into place.
--♫
“Dan! I’m stuck!” Pinkie cried, the rocks forcing her onto her hind legs, back against Dan’s.
“Yeah, join the club.” Dan said snidely as he struggled against the rocks pressed against his body.
“I thought I just did!” Pinkie replied in a confused tone as she wiggled in place.
--♫
The Order Keepers put some distance between Pinkie and Dan as the air crackled violently up and in between the grim king and the couple.
Pinkie gulped. “Well that doesn’t look good…”
Dan leaned his head back, watching the fog of the Nexus begin to collect into a sinister looking black cloud that crackled with violent energy.
“I’m on it…” Dan said.
“Huh?”
--♫
Dan closed his eyes and concentrated.
We need a shield…
Something heavy…something solid…
In his mind’s eye, his focus began to cruise through the blue-black fog of the Nexus, exciting out of the void into his world. He envisioned Earth, North America, California, Van Nuys, his bank…
“Got it!”
--♫
‘PCHSSSSHHHHFFFOOOOOOO!’
The air erupted in a violent blast of energy that closed in on Dan and Pinkie…
‘CLANGngngngngng…’
--Don't turn away, don't turn
…which slammed into a large bank vault door.
The vault flew into the air from the blast, vibrating with the hit.
--♫
‘KEWTHUDngngngng…’
The vault hit the ground, landing on a number of the still corporeal Order Keepers below
--♫
“No…” The grim king uttered. “It can’t be…”
--♫
Pinkie shimmied her body out of her rocky prison…
--♫
…giving Dan enough room to do the same.
--♫
Pinkie stared up at the halo and confused eyes above them. “What now?” She asked, turning to Dan.
--♫
Her eyes went wide as she noticed the two metal that were suddenly strapped to Dan’s back. Hoses jutted out and downward from the canisters and Dan held two control sticks in his hand.
Dan grinned as wide as his mouth would possibly allow. “Grab hold.”
Pinkie smiled and nodded. “Ummm-hmmm!” She hummed as she wrapped her legs around Dan.
--♫
Dan and Pinkie suddenly ascended into the air, the jetpack shooting streams of compressed gas below them.
--♫
The grim king’s eyes went wide, and he attempted to put some distance in between him and the rapidly approaching couple.
--♫
He felt the nebulousness of his being coalesce into a dreaded corporeal body, and the pull of gravity pull him towards the ground.
--♫
Pinkie grinned madly as the two zoomed up towards The Order Keeper King. She leapt off from Dan.
“SHORYUKEN!” She shouted as she through her hoof into the air, placing a perfect hit on The Order Keepers chin that snapped his head back.
The Order Keeper’s king fell limp in the sky, his crown falling from his head as both tumbled towards the ground.
“PINKIE!” Dan shouted. He quickly positioned himself down and hit his jets, his jetpack propelling him downwards towards Pinkie.
“DAN!” Pinkie cried as she reached out a forehoof.
Dan grabbed it and quickly pulled Pinkie close to him. He looked down and spotted the portal, leading directly to the couple’s couch below.
“HOLD ON, GOOFBALL!”
“YOU DON’T HAVE TO TELL ME TWICE!”
Dan shifted the two upright again and quickly hit his jets, desperate to slow their descent before…
‘CRASHUD!’
“ARRRGH!”
“EEEEEAK!”
Dan quickly pulled himself from the mess of wood and cushion that was now the couple’s ex-couch, and stared up into the portal that hovered several feet above him. He face contorted back into rage as he spied the unmistakable dim, blue stars of the Nexus above.
“RRRAAGH!” Dan roared angrily and gripped onto the side of the portal. He pulled with all his might and the glowing, red circle around the gateway begin to tear as if Dan was shredding a circular piece of paper made out of glowing energy.
“AAAARRRRRRRRRRRGH!”
Dan continued to rip and tear at the doorway between dimensions, it fell in pieces that seemed to fade from existence as they hit the apartment floor.
“Huff…puff…” Bleary eyed and red faced, Dan tried to catch his breath. He unstrapped his jetpack and allowed it to fall unceremoniously to the floor. He walked over to his easy chair and collapsed into it.
Hmmm…I feel like I’m forgetting something…
Dan’s eyes went wide with realization.
“PINKIE!?” He cried out in alarm.
A pink blur threw cushions and pieces of wood away as it shot out of the ruined couch and slammed into Dan, joining him on the easy chair.
“Mwah! MWHA! MWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH! Ohmygosh, OHMYGOSH! DAN, that was the most fantastically-stupendously-crazy-insanely-AWESOMEST THING I’VE EVER SEEN EVER, EVER, EVER!” Pinkie declared shrilly.
“…Pinkie?”
“First you were like…WACK! WHACK! WHACK, WHACK, WHACK! And I was like POW! And then…SNAKES EVERYWHERE!
“Pinkie!”
“But then the ground attacked us and I was like OH NO! And you were like BAM, GIANT METAL DOOR OUT OF NOWHERE!”
“PINKIE!”
“And then you were all like PCHOOOO! Whisking us up into the air, and then I was all like… SHORYUKEN! But then I was falling, and…
“PIIIIIINKIEEEE PIEEEEEEE!”
“WHAT?!”
Dan slowly wiped the Pink fur from his lips. “This might be a problem…”
Pinkie’s eyes went wide as she gulped and slowly raised pink forehooves into view.
Pinkie’s eye twitched. “Son of a BIT-”
3779928
I predict a couple of the later chapters are going to be very funny to you.
3779932
Speaking of funny, ever thought of doing something that, while funny, didn't have the emphasize on comedy that this story has and has a more beefed up emphasize on mind blowing, over the top, japanesy, dragon ball z levels of action in addition to the comedy and a good story?
3779943
I've thought about a bit. I'm a huge DBZ fan, and it might be fun to do a straight up action.
Fan fact: I own a shirt with this design on it (minus the background):
derpicdn.net/img/2013/3/21/276078/full.jpeg
Trouble is, I have so much material to get through here still, and even started a second ongoing fic (though, that's not likely to get the ginormous word-count this has). So it'll be a while before I can clear enough ideas out of my head to think about a coherent story, here.
3779964 3779964
DBZ!?
Man, that's been done to DEEEAAAATTHHHHH here and even with non-pony fics!
If I wanted to read a good fic with DBZ crossing over with something, I'd read Goku vs. Superman: Battle on New Namek or Goku vs. Superman: Rematch in Metropolis both of which can be found here and both of which are among the greatest fics I've ever read in my life:
https://www.fanfiction.net/s/6358660/1/Goku-vs-Superman-Confrontation-on-New-Namek
https://www.fanfiction.net/s/7080410/1/Superman-vs-Goku-Rematch-in-Metropolis
Seriously, if you're BOTH a Goku and Superman fan, you should check them out. The loving attention to detail and respect that the author has for both is astounding. It's almost like he plugged his brain to the computer and got all the words down that way it's so good. Warning though: this takes place BEFORE Death Battle's Death Battle of the two characters, and thusly, may be inaccurate in some ways, but since I'm willing to forgive characters being given a power boost or power decrease in a story from their cannon selves so long as it and the action is still good, I let it slide.
Now, where was I again?
Oh yeah!
Yeah, don't make ANOTHER DBZ crossover fic.
If you REALLY want to tap into a hidden potential (Thank you Lord Guru) that's never really been exposed but would be beautiful if it was like your Dan fic, I suggest you you make a crossover with MLP:FiM AND the ORIGINAL Dragon Ball. The one where Goku's a little kid. That would give you ENDLESS amounts of jokes to use, especially if Goku starts unintentionally 'touching' everypony because he doesn't understand the difference between a mare and a stallion and him wanting to ride or eat everypont he sees.
Or something like that! Whatever you want! Just PLEASE make a GOOD crossover with the original Dragon Ball, please?
NO ONE EVER MAKES A GOOD CROSSOVER WITH THE ORIGINAL EVEN THOUGH THE ORIGINAL IS SO MUCH EASIER TO MAKE A LONG EPIC STORY OUT OF WITHOUT MAKING EVERY ENEMY A CONTINENT OR PLANET BUSTER!
3779986
Eh, not sure if I'd make a straight up cross-over with DBZ, per se.
You make a good point in regards to Dragon Ball. Especially since ponies can't exactly just blow up planets.
Huh. Wonder if the human thing was just something that Discord did?
Oh man that was awesome!! Where in the world can it go from here? How will you top...THIS!?
Hello, it's me again
Just a few things I noticed
Isn't it Forehooves?
Please forgive me if i'm wrong.
Also
Isn't it Smooches?
Again, forgive me if i'm wrong.
...
Please, oh please don't hate me.
...
also, LOVED THE CHAPTER
Oh and one more thing (not a mistake)
Loved listening to this song whilst reading the fighting:
Keep up the good work
I winder if after hitting the Order King, what, aint they all supposed to be of order, bland and indistinguishable? Dan or more likely Pinkie accidentally picked up that crown thingie.?
As for Pinkie normal form, oh dear. This calls for extreme Nexus level violation, kick back. Such a multivrse altering visit to the Nexus sould leave at least the very faintest side effect in Dan and Pinkie, so that Pinkie can do her walk behind a lamppost and change from one reality form to another, and Dan?
When Dan gets angry, he can summon that bank vault door?
3780320
I do need to correct "forehoves", though they are saying "smoochees", even though the word is actually "smooches".
Thanks!
Missed the perfect one-liner.
"You're out of order."
Fun fast read, as usual.
3784836
There's always next time... I'll remember that one.
Why can't this line work in real life? It sums up my feelings perfectly.
Can you please put title and/or link to song somewhere in gdocs version next time? It just drives me mad trying to find song by lyrics...
his speech made me think of the didacts from the end of halo 4, plus if you play Street Fighter Remix by Antoine Lavenant it goes with the fight fairly well
Still a pony....hmm. Fun times ahead.
When's Dan going to Equestria?
Aw shit son, she's still a pony!!!
this story is just badass.
look at the bright side. I'm regained my composure and last chapter was so hardcore and metal I(along with this one) that nobody (not even the author) make a crack about last chapter being number 69 -giggity-
4397317 79
4516556 No no no, take away all of the prologues and epilogues and special chapters. You will find that it is 69. Besides, the title has "Chapter 70" in the friggin URL
For a good refute to the opening dialouge of the chapter, I refer you to the comment section of A New World, A New Way. Specifically the chapters leading up to and including the fight between Discord and Zygarde.
Dan once again began randomly budging targets that fell under his might
I THOUGHT I DID TO
exciting out of the void into his world
Her eyes went wide as she noticed the two metal that were suddenly strapped to Dan’s back. Hoses jutted out and downward from the canisters and Dan held two control sticks in his hand.
She shouted as she through her hoof into the air
and the glowing, red circle around the gateway begin to tear
1. Bludgeoning.
2. Too.
3. Exiting.
4. You somehow forgot to describe the backpack midway through.
5. Threw.
6. Began.
Personally, I think I would've chosen Andrew W.K.'s 'Get ready to Die'. It just seems to fit Dan better, and it's a powerful tune that you can definitely see someone fight to.
Welp. That's definitely a wrinkle.
Now Dan can ride Pinkie whenever he wants.
You know I was disappointed that Ed didn't die a horrible death, but I JUST PLAIN DON'T GIVE A FUCK ABOUT THAT HORRID TWILIGHT REFERENCE ANYMORE!!!!!!! This is pure, ungodly AWESOMENESS AND WHILE I WAS LISTENING TO THE MUSIC WHILE READING I ACTUALLY GOT UP AND DANCED FOR THE HELL OF IT!!!!! YOU SIR/MADAM ARE A AWE INSPIRING WRITER! *sighs in relief* Okay fan-rant over with.
4676931 I personally would have gone with Skillet's "Circus for a Psycho" or Thousand Foot Krutch's "Let the Sparks Fly", but, to each his own.
Thiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiis...should be interesting...
I personally would have gone with Ghost Town by Egypt Central with this fight sequence, but to each his own. Rereading after 70 weeks away and loving it.
This might be an interesting way to end TOK once and for all https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HDXvUqCZXD4 Convince them that, if they did eventually win, they'd go insane from boredom. What they enjoy most is the act of keeping order, rather than order itself, so it would actually behoove them to let the multiverse continue for as long as possible.