The Other Side of the Story
THE OTHER SIDE OF THE STORY
An hour later, just after lowering the sun for the night, Celestia strode at a measured pace down a thoroughfare in the heart of Canterlot, flanked by her sister and two guards. Luna looked over to her. “How was she, when you left her?”
Celestia thought back to the mare currently nestled in pillows and blankets up in Celestia’s quarters, remembering the conversation she’d just had with her.
“Are you sure it’s fine if I stay here tonight, Princess? I just don’t want to be alone if I wake up in the middle of the night,” said Twilight.
“Of course it’s fine. Remember all those times you fell asleep here when we’d stay up watching the stars? It will be just like that,” replied Celestia, stroking her mane.
Twilight grew quiet again, her eyes droopy as she pulled the blanket she was wrapped in a little more tightly against herself. “...was Princess Luna angry at me? Because I didn’t fight back hard enough?”
“She was just upset to see how hurt you were by this. So am I,” said Celestia.
“I don’t know what I’m supposed to do next,” said Twilight. She grew still again. Celestia could only hope that she was finally drifting off for the first time in nearly two days. “What’s going to happen to the colt?”
Celestia froze for an instant. She had hoped to avoid raising that with Twilight for a little longer, but if she wanted to bring the question up of her own accord maybe she was ready to discuss it. “Well, that still depends on a lot of things. Can I ask what you’d want me to do, if there were no other considerations?”
Twilight squirmed uncomfortably and looked away from the Princess. “For the first couple weeks after it happened, I was really angry about it. I came up with all these elaborate revenge plans that would have seriously injured him, or even worse gotten him expelled for something else so nopony would ever have to know it was because of me. I never used any of them though, and I eventually decided I just wanted to pretend it hadn’t happened.” She let out a bitter chuckle. “Guess that didn’t really work out too well, did it?”
“And now?”
“Now? I think I just don’t want anypony else to go through something like this, and to feel good about myself again. Do you think hating him would make that easier? I could try.”
Celestia leaned down and gave her a peck on the cheek. “I don’t think hatred ever helps. Why don’t you close your eyes now? I’ll sit here for a little while longer.”
Twilight slowly shut her eyes and let out a long sigh. “Thank you, Princess. I’ll... just...”
“Asleep, finally,” said Celestia, her mind returning to the matter at hoof. “It took me a half an hour with her before she passed out. Would you do me a favor, Luna? Watch over her dreams tonight? I’m sure they’ll be troubled ones, after she just re-lived...” she glanced over to the guards, “...what we spoke of earlier.”
“Of course,” said Luna. She frowned. “How could I not have known? She must have had nightmares about it.”
“When it was recent, I’m certain she did. Perhaps not any longer. Or at least infrequently enough in the few years you’ve been back that you might easily have missed them. You cannot blame yourself.”
Luna narrowed her eyes. “Oh, I understand exactly how the blame for this should be portioned out.”
Celestia didn’t miss the edge to her sister’s voice, or the fact that her ire was rising as they grew closer to their destination. “If you cannot control yourself, perhaps I should do this alone.”
“No. I want to see this through, for Twilight’s sake. I will behave.”
The conversation drew a few glances from passers by, who just as quickly turned back to their own business. The Princesses were a moderately unusual sight in the city, but hardly unique. When the party reached the corner they needed to turn down to reach their destination, Celestia brought them to a halt. “Please wait here for our return, or for a summons,” she said to the guards. They saluted sharply and stepped against a nearby wall, waiting at attention. Luna and Celestia continued into the residential neighborhood, where shops and vendors started to give way to homes and apartments.
“You don’t want them along? To raise the intimidation factor?” asked Luna.
“I think we’re both quite capable of being intimidating on our own. Besides that isn’t the primary purpose of this visit,” said Celestia. Luna looked away. “I said, that isn’t the primary purpose of this visit. We only have half of the information about what happened. Perhaps his side of the story will change things, perhaps not.”
“Yes, yes,” said Luna waving her hoof dismissively. The two of them stopped at the small home that stood at the address they'd pulled from the guard's public records. Celestia reached out her hoof and knocked.
A moment went by before they heard movement inside the dwelling and the door was answered by a very pregnant yellow mare. When she looked up at who was standing on her stoop, her jaw dropped. "Princess Luna! Princess Celestia! Oh my!" She struggled to lower her body into a bow, but Celestia waved her gesture off.
"None of that is necessary, especially in your condition. We are both pleased to meet you. May we come inside?" she asked.
"Of course! I'm sorry it's in such a state. I wasn't expecting your visit at all!"
"Nonsense, you have a lovely home," said Luna. Her gaze paused on a nearby photograph. It showed the mare, not yet pregnant, smiling with a scrawny blue unicorn stallion by the side of a lake. "Is your husband home, perchance? We need to speak with him."
"Yes, he's in the study. Can I ask what this is about?"
"One of the accounts at the bank he works at. We just had a few question," said Celestia, repeating the cover story they had agreed to on the way over.
"Important enough for both of you to come by yourself, at this hour? It must be serious. I'll take you right to him," she said.
"Yes, extremely serious," said Luna. The three of them began to walk down a hallway into the house. "Tell me, how long have you known your husband? What sort of pony is he?" she asked. Celestia shot her a warning glance that the mare leading them didn't notice.
"Oh, I know that being an accountant doesn't sound very interesting, especially to your highnesses, but he's just the sweetest pony I know! I'm a teller at the same bank, well, I'm on leave right now of course, but that's how we met. He first asked me out, hmm, about three years ago. I absolutely couldn't be happier, and any week now we'll have a little filly! Do you want to see some magisound pictures?"
"Perhaps later," said Luna. "How long have you been married?"
"Around six months."
Celestia did some quick math and gave the mare a knowing grin and a wink. "Ah. One of those marriages?"
The mare blushed. "That did accelerate things a touch, but I don't regret it even a little."
"Nor should you. It sounds like you're both very blessed."
The mare nodded happily. "I certainly feel that way! But, oh, I'm sorry, here's the study." She gestured to a nearby door and pushed it open. Laid out on the floor in the middle of the room, surrounded by open ledgers and loose paper, was the stallion from the picture. Celestia was surprised at just how... ordinary he was. Not a pony she would give a second glance if she passed by him on the streets.
He looked up as they entered, and the quill he was writing with froze in midair, suspended in a field of his magic. “Wha... what?”
“Sorry for the interruption, hon, but we have company. The Princesses said they need to speak to you,” said the mare.
“With me?”
“Yes,” said Celestia, “in confidence, if you’ll excuse us?”
“Of course, Princess,” said the mare. Celestia watched her slip out the door behind them, but Luna’s eyes never left the stallion.
The door closed, and Celestia’s horn glowed. “Sister?” asked Luna. “Is the soundproofing spell in place?”
“Yes, it is,” said Celestia. She turned to the stallion. “Now, we were hoping to privately discuss some-”
“YOU RUTTING SON OF A WHORE!” screamed Luna in the Royal Canterlot Voice.
Celestia turned to her sister, nearly as shocked as the stallion. “LUNA! Calm yourself! Another outburst like that and I will drag you back to the palace myself! Sir, let me apologize on my sister’s behalf for her behavior.”
“You’re apologizing to him? After what Twilight Sparkle told us?”
“Twilight Sparkle?” asked the stallion as he recovered some of his bearings. “Did something happen to her?”
Celestia wasn’t sure, but she worried that her sister might be about to lunge at him right then and there. She placed a cautionary hoof gently but firmly on her back. Luna seethed for a moment, her eyes closed, then reopened them with a huff. “She told us how you raped her.”
“How I did what?”
“At a party you both attended, during the time you were at the Academy. We were hoping...” at that word Celestia gave Luna a meaningful look, “...to understand what happened a little better. Do you remember the party she’s talking about?”
“When we were thirteen? Well, yes, but I still don’t understand.”
Luna had calmed herself just enough to discuss the matter rationally. “Describe what you do remember.”
The stallion furrowed his brow. He swept the documents off the floor and placed them on a nearby desk in a messy pile and sat up. “Well... I remember seeing her by the punch bowl, and one of my friends dared me to ask her to dance. I think they thought it would be funny to watch us both embarrass ourselves. I mean, she mostly kept to herself at school. But she was cute, and I’d had some beer so I decided to do it.”
“You were drinking?” asked Celestia.
“Not a lot,” said the stallion. “I wasn’t drunk, just a little bit buzzed. Maybe two or three beers in a couple hours?”
“Was it two beers, or three?” pressed Luna.
“I don’t remember!” he said as he threw an exasperated hoof into the air. “It was a long time ago. At first I thought Twilight might have had about as much, she seemed really giddy for a mare I’d heard was this really serious pony. She told me she’d only had the punch though.”
Luna and Celestia looked at one another. “Did you ever taste the punch?”
“No, I just had beer.”
Luna put a hoof up to her chin “Twilight said she felt lightheaded at the party. What if it was more than adrenaline and hormones?”
Celestia shook her head. “She didn’t say she felt drugged, just excited.”
“What if she couldn’t tell the difference? At thirteen? It’s possible, isn’t it?”
“Um...” the colt said, “...I asked her to dance, and a few minutes into it she did collide with another pony and fell over.”
“Impaired coordination!” proclaimed Luna.
“Luna, have you ever seen Twilight trying to dance?” asked Celestia. She allowed a small twitch to pull at the corner of her mouth as she recalled the single time she had tried to teach that particular skill to her young student. The lesson had been as ineffective as it was hysterical. “I can easily see her colliding with somepony else even with a perfectly clear head.”
Luna thought about this. “Could we find out? Ask the archmagi to craft a spell that would pull a sample of the liquid into the present for investigation? Surely a small sample could be collected without endangering the progression of events.”
“Not without bombarding it with so much energy that the results of the testing would be at best uninformative and at worst misleading,” said Celestia. “Such magics are not as helpful in these sorts of matters as one might hope.”
Luna sighed. “Very well, continue your account.”
“After she fell I helped her back up. She said she was okay. We ended up really close against one another, and I went in for the kiss. She seemed to be fine with it, so I went for broke and asked her if she wanted to go back to the bedroom with me, and she nodded.”
“You didn’t specifically ask her if she wanted to have sex?” asked Luna.
“Well, no, I remember I was trying to be all suave about it,” he said.
“Twilight’s telling of it suggested that she understood what he meant. She said she didn’t change her mind until after they went into the bedroom but before anything started,” said Celestia.
Luna glared at her. “Whose side are you on?”
“None of them, Luna. And if you continue to insist that this is a question of ‘sides’ then you have no business being involved at all.”
“She changed her mind after we went into the bedroom?” asked the stallion, returning the Princesses’ attention to his story. “She didn’t say anything. I picked her up in my magic and laid her down on her back. I was... I thought it was romantic, that’s all. Then I got onto the bed with her. I climbed on top of her... she said she’d changed her mind?”
“Yes. She said she tried to push you away. Can you describe what she was doing before you started the actual...” Luna waved a hoof in the air, dancing around the word.”
“The sex,” said Celestia in a flat tone. “Honestly, Luna, we’re all grown stallions and mares here.”
“Um...” the stallion frowned and tried to recall. “Well... I guess she did push on me a little. Not very hard, though, I thought she was just trying to adjust where I was on her. And she was wriggling a bit, but I thought she was just getting comfortable since she stopped after a minute or so. It didn’t feel like she was... so you’re saying she was...” the stallion went pale. “I swear I didn’t know. If she’d said anything, anything at all, I would have stopped. She moaned a bit too, but I thought that was how it was supposed to sound.”
“You were certain she was happy with what was happening?” asked Celestia.
“It was my first time. I wasn’t certain of anything, but I didn’t think I was hurting her.”
“You could have asked,” said Luna. “All it would have taken was you asking if she was enjoying herself, but you didn’t care enough to do so. As it is, under the law, it sounds a great deal like what you did was rape. Especially with what came afterwards.”
“What came...” the stallion’s face fell even further as the realization dawned. “Oh, that. I... I make no excuse for that. I was frustrated, embarrassed, and a stupidly impulsive colt. When I thought she was laughing at me I didn’t think. I just lashed out and slapped her. I think I yelled something at her too, but I couldn’t tell you exactly what.”
“Twilight can. She remembers it in excruciating detail,” said Celestia.
“I knew right away that I had screwed up, badly. She started crying, and I apologized and tried to get her to talk to me, but she wouldn’t. So a few minutes later I just... left. I got away from the party as quickly as I could.”
“You left her alone and hurt? You didn’t tell anypony what had happened?” asked Luna.
The colt shook his head. “I saw her in the hallway the next day, but we didn’t have any classes together and we just sort of avoided each other. I was terrified for the next two weeks that I’d be called into the principal’s office and suspended or expelled, even when I thought all I had done was hit her.” When he looked up and saw Luna’s eyes narrowing he waved his hooves in front of him. “I don’t mean that hitting her wasn’t awful! I just mean I didn’t know she felt like I’d raped her. I thought she had decided she didn’t want to make a big deal out of it.”
“You honestly believed that she was just going to forget it, and that she didn’t think it was important?” asked Celestia.
“That’s the way it looked. And frankly it’s what I wanted to believe. But I swear, I’ve never done anything like that ever again. I buckled down and studied, I don’t drink besides a goblet of wine or so on special occasions, and I never, ever struck anypony in anger after that night. Are you...” the stallion’s voice quivered, “...are you going to arrest me? Please, I know it was a mistake, but it was honestly just that. I’m starting a family, and I’m trying my hardest to be a good pony.”
Celestia looked askance at Luna, who screwed up her nose, but then sighed. “No. We are not going to take any legal action against you, or do anything to sully your good name. But the harm and pain Twilight suffered due to your actions will be on your conscience. Who you tell about this and what you tell them is entirely up to you.”
“Does she want me to apologize?” he asked.
“For the time being we would ask that you not try to contact her,” said Celestia. “However, if she requests it at some point in the future, would you be willing to speak with her? In a private setting mediated by a neutral third party, certainly not her friends, family, or either of us.”
“I’d be open to that, sure,” said the stallion. “For what it’s worth, you can tell her I am sorry. If there’s anything I can do to make it better, or anything I can do at all, just tell me. I don’t... I don’t want to live with the idea that I never tried to make up for this somehow. I don’t have a lot of bits, with the foal on the way-”
“One cannot purchase atonement,” said Luna. “It is something that you will need to work at every day, and something that not everypony is capable of of attaining."
"Well, I'm not sure I'd go that far," said Celestia, "I think even the most egregious sins can be forgiven eventually. Wouldn't you agree, Luna? That everypony deserves a chance to fix the mistakes they made long ago?"
Luna's nose twitched in irritation and she huffed. She looked away from Celestia's pointed gaze, taking a moment to close her eyes. Then, as she came to a decision, she opened them again. "My sister tells me you graduated in the eightieth percentile of your class?"
"Huh?" said the stallion, confused by the apparant shift in topic. "Yeah, I got pretty decent grades. Why?"
"So it's fair to say that you are quite adept in the magical arts?"
"What's your point, Luna?" asked Celestia.
Luna ignored her for the time being, her attention fixed on the stallion. "You say you want to find relief for your guilt. How badly? Badly enough to do a thankless, exhausting task when you could be resting comfortably with your wife and future foal?"
The stallion thought carefully about the question. "Well, if I feel this guilty, how restful would it really be?"
For the first time since meeting with Twilight earlier, Luna genuinely smiled. "That is an excellent answer. If you choose, please accept an invitation to the palace tomorrow evening and ask to see me. I will make sure you are admitted to my study."
He trembled. "Why? Wh-what are you going to do to me?"
"Not do, teach. I think you are an excellent candidate to learn the art of dream walking," she said. "It is a difficult and unpleasant technique. You enter the darkest fantasies of a sleeping pony, and brave their greatest doubts and fears to bring them peace. Usually, they do not even remember your assistance when they wake."
"How often would you want me to? Is this like a community service thing?"
"It is not. After I spend the week or so teaching you how to do it, you need never use the magic again if you decide not to. All I am doing is offering you a new tool. What is to be built with it is up to you."
"You'd do that for me?" asked the amazed stallion.
"We both would," said Celestia. "I would rather see the lives of my subjects rebuilt and improved then tear any more of them down. If my sister wants to extend this offer, I am entirely in favor of it. But let me be as clear as I can, this is not an obligation or something we want you to feel you need to do lest you face other consequences."
The stallion gave them a sad little smile. "No consequences? I have to tell my wife that her husband... or maybe just the father of her child, after this... that I'm a rapist."
"We told Twilight that what happened that night does not define who she is or what she might yet become. The same is true for you," said Celestia. "Ultimately that is between you and your wife. Now, I believe we've done what we came here to do, and we really should be getting back to the palace."
The stallion scurried over to open the door for them. "I'll walk you out," he offered, and the three returned back down the hallway they'd entered through. As they passed by the kitchen, the stallion's wife tried to surreptitiously glance over at them from the sink where she was washing some dishes.
Celestia stopped at the front door. “I’m glad we could begin to resolve this tonight. Do note though, if these sort of... irregularities... crop up again, the outcome will be very different. Am I understood?”
The stallion gulped. “Yes, Princess, perfectly. They won’t. Ever.”
“Until we meet again, then,” said Luna. The Princesses stepped out into the night.
As the door closed behind them, the last words they heard were the mare’s. “What was that about?” she asked, but any reply was cut off by the door closing.
“So now what?” asked Luna.
Celestia stared up at Canterlot palace. In one of its spires slept a very important pony with a very uncertain and difficult future ahead of her. “Now we get ready. Tomorrow the truly difficult part begins.”
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It's entirely possible that throwing more fuel onto the smoldering embers of the flame war that erupted after the last chapter is a terrible idea.
Never let it be said that I am a wise or cautious pony
3072313 Cool! I love fire! Let it burn!
That sounded psychotic, didn't it? WIth the Pinkamena and all?
intriguing.....is this going to become a thing...or is this just a one time extention?
3072313
You are a brave, brave person.
As for me, pretty much what I expected. Stupid kids being stupid. I was bit confused by what the point of the dream walker offer was. Felt a bit out of left field.
3072480
I was thinking one time extension... but then again this was originally a one-shot. I don't know that I have anything to say about Twilight's recovery. As the chapter title suggests, this was sort of the 'other half' of the original.
3072486
Atonement mechanism, helping him undo damage in other ponies as penance for the damage he himself did.
Quite good.
Upvote for you.
3072492
true....the way I see it is the Twilight kind of becomes a side character if you want to continue it.....I would say go into his training under Luna/telling his family, there are some tough but powerful moments to be brought up, perhaps have him visit Twilight's dream when she is having a nightmare about it (he comes to see her view of the night)....his attempts to help other people and/or his eventual meeting with Twilight.....granted all this somewhat gets away from the original point of the story, but my point being that I see outlets that this could continue on if you wanted to.....or keep this one completed and do that as a side story.....I'm rambling at this point....I liked the extra chapter and I look forward to whatever your next tale is
Ah what no! I want to see Twilight feel better! D:
But hey, at least there's that side of the story taken care of.
3072496 Huh. ....That's a very interesting extension. I like it. :) Good show.
I like this. It proves how there's two or more sides to a story that can make the same situation look radically different based on the perspective.
You can't look at something from just a single angle and expect to understand it.
Is it like, double complete now?
3073155
The complete tag will never stand between me and writing out an idea if it wriggles into my head. That said, I don't think there's anywhere else I want to take this.
"Throwing more fuel on the fire?"
No. No, this... this actually redeemed it a bit. I have no idea why. Maybe it's the confirmation of the "stupid kids doing stupid things" aspect, but... my downvote has been changed to an up, good sir.
3073464
Thanks! And thanks for giving it a second chance.
People made a lot of good points in the comments, and I still regret adding him hitting her in the original, but yeah. "Stupid kids being stupid" was the idea I was going with the original.
3073484
Thinking back on it, and after re-reading my first comment on the story from way back when, I think it's because you gave the story a chance to actually be a story. Before, it was simply "Twilight was raped and we all feel bad." Now, it's "Twilight was raped, and now we deal with it and grow as characters." From being a story in a vacuum, to being a chance for someone to learn something and better themselves.
known
spend
Luna's participation in the conversation, for the most part, was cringe-worthy. She acts like a squabbling child, something that is not excused by her emotional investment in the issue. It would have made far more sense to have her removed by her second or third outburst.
Also, is it just me, or does adding this chapter weaken the meaning of the story? The first chapter focused a lot on how, even as god-like beings, there was no simple way for Luna and Celestia to resolve this problem. But now... the colt in question has a way to atone for his behavior and Twilight, under the Princesses' guidance, can begin to recover. There's no longer a lingering question about how to deal with the 'rapist' in such a way that he and Twilight can find closure without overstepping any boundaries. Showing that the stallion wants to right his wrongs , as opposed to leaving it a mystery, makes finding a good solution comparably easier.
Or something like that. I can't think straight today.
3073592
I actually feel in agreement here. While it was interesting to see the other side, I think this chapter thematically weakens the original. A fair bit of the original upload's strength lied in how enigmatic the scenario was. Now everything is clear; rather than there being no good answers, both Twilight and the stallion are provided with answers and paths they can take. The open-ended discussion on what power the Princesses have (and how they cannot use that power how they wish without crossing certain lines) is gone. Justice, originally painted as a nebulous concept that sometimes binds us, is now straightforward.
I don't want to sell the idea that I don't still like the story—I do, and I think it's well-written. This chapter succeeds in illuminating a murky scenario and bringing in some closure; I just feel that for this particular story, closure or clarity weren't needed in the first place.
But of course this is only one humble reader's opinion, which is far from gospel. And while the original themes are dashed, a few new ones like atonement and the pursuit of truth have sprung up. So there's that.
3072492
I liked it, partially because it didn't mess with my head like the first part did, and because of the redemption theme which is 100% correct, at least from my point of view. Why can I only thumb up once?
This was, I think, a very nice resolution to the whole ordeal.
You wrapped it up quite nice, really.
~Skeeter The Lurker
Would this followup happen to be spurred by the blog RealityCheck made on the matter, in which he ranted about how awful rape is as a plot device?
3077820
I actually started writing it the day after I posted the first chapter, then it languished for a while. I'll check out the blog post, though.
You wouldn't have a link, would you?
3077848 It's right here. But be forewarned; this guy has very strong and often controversial opinions, especially in regards to politics.
http://www.fimfiction.net/blog/185733/rapeasdrama-die-in-a-fire
3077858
Ah, I was trying to google a blog called Reality Check, no wonder I couldn't find it.
Based on the date this story was posted, and the very upset comment from RC you'll find if you scroll far enough down, I suspect that post was inspired by this story, not the other way around.
Anyway, I don't think this fic is 'rape as a plot device' but rather 'rape as a premise.'
No way is it 'thinly veiled porn.' Neither account goes into the mechanics or does anything sexual. Twilight even outright skips it.
We'd probably have very different views on where the line between consensual sex and rape are drawn. My take is that this was rape, and I don't want to put words in his mouth but his would probably be that since Twilight didn't make it clear enough that she was withdrawing consent it shouldn't count.
I don't think anything I wrote in this chapter would do anything but piss him off further if he reads it, to be honest.
3077905 Yeah probably.
And I know he was the one upset by the first part of this story. I just was asking if the SECOND chapter was inspired by the blog, but as you began writing it the day after, this is not the case.
3077913
If anything, it was inspired by the back and forth in the comments about whether L+C going to talk to the guy was an abuse of power. That got the wheels turning about how it would actually play out, and there were a few other things mentioned (Why didn't Luna pick up on Twi's nightmares? Why don't they just use time travel?) that I thought I could address.
3077925 Ah, I see. Makes sense. I'll be interested to see whether the guy takes up Luna on her offer.
3077964
I'd figure he probably does, at least gets the training. One of the other commentators suggested he stumbles on Twilight's nightmare of the night by accident, and they confront one another that way, which isn't an idea that I really like. Kinda unfair to her.
It also raises the question of "Why is Luna fine with giving a rapist the power to go in and mess with pony's dreams? Isn't she trusting him a bit fast?"
To which I'd reply "She's trusting in him not wanting her to remove his spine through his nose when she finds out"
Man... reading those comments on that blog post... It would be wrong of me to pop in and reply with a link to the second chapter... but I'm so tempted... I guess after my blog post today I'm still in a confrontational mindset.
3077984 lawl, I say go ahead. Pissing off the victims of "misandry" is fun.
And by misandry, I mean perceived misandry. From the same people who use the term "feminazi."
3078064
Nah, I can't bring myself to troll them that blatantly.
I'm sure one of them will discover it someday and then they'll descend.
3078064
You know, it also occurs to me that last week I also wrote a female-on-male attempted rape scene. They'd probably find a way to complain about that too, given that both ponies in question are serial killers, and the batshit insane one tells him that he "deserves it."
Of course she means it in a sweet and loving way... yeah they'd probably be mad about that too.
3078101 Ah. That's uh...that's something.
3078199
Yeah, and that's just scratching the surface of some of the crazy stuff that's going on during that fic. Oh Optimalverse, why are you so mind twisting?
This probably makes me a bit of an asshole, but feel somewhat smug for having argued this point "all along".
3073592
Actually, it makes you feel that meaning in the first chapter, and teaches you why you shouldn't feel it in this second one. It's a story that honestly hits the core purpose of story telling. It's to be used as a medium that makes you think and learn from observations and examples. There is always something you can do, it's up to you to find out what would be the next course of action, even if you don't know what could possibly become of that action.
3074758
It does change the open-ended theme, but it gives a chance to grow and learn from it. Also, we now have a potential full blown story with these "left field twists" adding room for growth in new and interesting ways. Now we have the less prominent question of "How is he going to use this dreamwalking magic?" Given the implications, he could easily manipulate ponies dreams to his liking and if what Luna said was true, they probably wouldn't even know who did it. There are plenty of loose ends to tie up as well. IMO, this story is begging for continuation.
3073592
Thanks, fixed the typoes.
"Second or third outburst?" I only see one Luna outburst, after which Celestia tells her she'll be removed if she does something like that again. Other than "You rutting son of a whore," what do you think qualifies as an outburst?
And while I guess the original dilemmas might be more ambiguous with less information, its also information that's easily enough to attain that it presents the problem as "no good answers yet" instead of "no good answers are possible." This answer hardly satisfies every point of the original, and even adds new ones. Twi's still hurting, the stallion suddenly has to reevaluate just about everything he's done in the last dozen-plus years, might even lose his new family, and has to decide whether or not to take up a new burden as penance for the pain he caused inadvertently. I guess the Princesses feel better that they've tied off a loose end, but as Celestia says, "tomorrow the hard part starts."
3084106
I don't think he gets full-on Inception powers, just the ability to alleviate pain and stress.
And if he misuses it to hurt somepony, I'm pretty sure Luna'd make sure nopony ever found his body.
Oh, also? You just had to add a comment to that blog post?
3085499
I had to. My arrogant ego couldn't go without telling him he was wrong at least once. It's a hostage situation you see, I can't be held accountable!
Oh, hey. Found this story while seeing if that new one hadn't gone up, and if I should have been poking at it.
I'm actually sort of surprised that you stealth-added a chapter to this one. It was rather dripping with rabid controversy, after all. For obvious reasons.
Really, this chapter just made it all the more clear that the guy a) is pretty decent, b) was a stupid thirteen year old, and c) had absolutely no idea that consent had ever been withdrawn. And I think it's a pretty believable course of events. Thirteen year olds are morons. But he probably would have stopped if he'd known.
I don't really want to delve into some argument on ethics and morality. But honestly, I shudder to live in a world where it's required for anyone to stop after every movement, ask if consent is still there, and not move again until it's verbally provided, or given in written triplicate. Where romance or spontaneity is verboten under the blanket of legal ass-covering and fear. And where someone can be like: 'I totally scratched their back with my nails. That means I withdrew consent, how could they not know?'. The withdrawl of consent is a serious thing. And it should be the instant, unquestioned brakes. But Twilight wasn't gagged. She was able to talk. And if she had, it all probably wouldn't have happened.
But she was a stupid, possibly intoxicated teenager too.
Some responsibility really does need to be placed on both parties, as forbidden as it is to place any measure of blame on the victim. Both parties made stupid mistakes, one in giving cues, one in receiving them. Easily-misinterpreted body language isn't exactly a universal language, especially when people have been drinking, and doubly so when people are involved in a very physical activity, like, say, sex, which they aren't familiar with.
Did he rape her? Yeah. Anything where one is subjected to sex without wanting it is rape.
Did he know he was raping her? Clearly not.
Does that make him a rapist in a legal sense? I have no clue at all. Where does Mens Rea fall in rape cases?
Also:
This kind of Luna is best Luna.
3078101
Oh, you're continuing Psychotherapy is Configurable?
I figured it was abandoned.
He kind of does deserve it. The bastard.
lol, you ended the fic with, "Tomorrow the truly difficult part begins." How can you possibly call it complete?
Not criticizing or anything - I enjoyed the read, as I've enjoyed all of your works.
Honestly I think it was better without the second chapter, leaving it ambigious.
Wait, this updated? And you left a hook on the end of it. Argh.
3608502
Yeah, I wasn't planning to and then I sort of snuck the second chapter in there under everyone's nose. At least that way the flame war didn't reignite.
3608513
Well, I quite like it. Handles the subject matter in a very mature and reasonable fashion.
Also, impulsive Luna is amazing.
Well, I have to say that this story perfectly illustrates the point that life just sucks sometimes and there's no one and nothing to blame for it. Thumb up and favorite.
Assuming this is a mistake and Luna wasn't simply not caring about the details. But if that was your intention, I would think that you would have him correct Luna, so this stood out to me.
It was also the only thing I noticed out of place, though. But shouldn't Luna have said 'filly', or even just 'foal'?
You sure this is complete?
I have but one problem with this story. It ends far too early. I want to know what happens after! What policies are instituted to prevent future incidents? Does Twilight ever get better? Does the "rapist" redeem himself? What comes of him learning to enter dreams?
If you have no intention of continuing the story, could it be adopted?
4383946
If you want to write some sort of follow up, go for it. The questions you raised are sort of beyond the scope of what I wanted the story to be.
That sounds like a fucking excuse asshole!!!
ok, well
enjoyed, so liked, but not a fav.....
and after reading comments, rather low in my faith in humanity
she did not voice change of consent, so in a trial this would (or rather should; a crying girl tends to sway a jury.....) go in the favor of the guy ON THAT ALONE. however, with the hitting part put in afterwords, he would screwed if the jury was favoring him before. that shit just doesn't go over well, ever.