15 - Epilogue
“ALLLLLL ABOARD!”
Cheerilee uncovered her ears and looked down at her eager students carrying their bags as they followed Trixie towards the boarding ramp. “Is it really such a good idea to bring fillies like that onto such an expensive-looking cruise? I just hope they don’t cause too much trouble when we take off…”
Meanwhile, Celestia greeted the boarding fillies with a warm smile and wishes to enjoy the cruise. ‘Let the fun begin.’
“Our cabin’s down this way,” Trixie said as she turned to the left, followed by the fillies and Cheerilee. “It looks like we’ll all be sharing a cabin, but it’s apparently pretty spacious. And just a heads up, Trixie’s not sharing her bed with anypony, even if you have nightmares or are homesick.”
Cheerilee frowned, wondering how such a pony could have become such a successful teacher, even with so few students.
“Too bad,” Scootaloo said to Apple Bloom, nudging her from the side. “Guess that means you won’t get any alone time with your new fillyfriend.”
Apple Bloom blushed as Sweetie Belle giggled. “Don’t worry,” Sweetie Belle added. “I’m sure you and Diamond Tiara can find somewhere on this big ship to be alone.”
Babs couldn’t help but laugh as she saw steam coming out of her cousin’s ears. Finally, Apple Bloom erupted. “Ah told y’all, we’re NOT GOIN’ OUT!”
Scootaloo and Sweetie Belle ran past Trixie as Apple Bloom chased them. “Hey!” Trixie shouted. “No running off on your own!”
“No need to be so embarrassed,” Silver Spoon said to a glaring Diamond Tiara. “Everypony needs love, after all.”
Diamond Tiara snapped to her friend with her teeth baring. “We are not like that! It was just for the play!”
“It’s okay,” Babs said. “You can be honest. We won’t judge you.”
Diamond Tiara roared and stamped her hooves on the floor. “WE. ARE NOT. A. THING!” Diamond Tiara charged past Trixie and took a turn, Silver Spoon, Babs, and Alula running after her, pleading for her to wait up.
“Wait!” Trixie was about to chase after the fillies, but stopped as she realised how fruitless it would be. She instead turned to Cheerilee behind her, who looked just as exhausted as the showmare herself. And they hadn’t even taken off yet. “… Wanna hit up the bar?”
“… Sounds good.” The two mares changed direction and headed off towards the nearest bar as indicated by the maps strewn about the ship.
“How do you lose track of a radiant filly like Diamond Tiara and her clingy sidekick?” Alula asked as she and Babs traversed the maze that was the S.S. Blueblood, walking through what felt like the same corridor for the fifth time. “For that matter, how did we get so lost that we’re walking around in circles?”
“It’s not circles,” Babs told her. “It’s jus’ that a lot of these hallways look the same… I think.”
“I’m borrrrred,” Alula whined. “And hungry, too.”
Babs’ stomach growled at that. “Yeah, I guess it is time ta eat somethin’… Hey, check it out!” Babs pointed to a small cupboard-like hole in the wall. “It’s a dumbwaiter!”
“That’s not very nice,” Alula said.
“No, that’s what it’s called,” Babs deadpanned.
“Oh… So, what does it do?”
“It’s a lift they use to take food from the kitchen to other floors. I bet we can use it ta get down to the place where they serve all the food!”
“But are we allowed to?” Alula asked.
“It’s either that, or we wander around aimlessly for the rest of our lives tryin’ ta find the stupid stairs.”
“Hmmm… Guess you’re right. Okay, let’s go!”
The two fillies climbed into the dumbwaiter, just about able to fit with some breathing room left over. Babs hit the switch outside and pulled her hoof back in as the door closed… taking away what little breathing room they had.
“… This might not have been the best idea after all,” Babs said as she felt the dumbwaiter moving downwards.
“Hey, look!” Apple Bloom said as she pointed a hoof towards an item on the menu. “They’ve got apple fritters!” She looked at her two friends, who were both still grinning as they nursed their drinks. With a frustrated sigh, Apple Bloom lowered her menu. “Ah todl y’all, it ain’t like that.”
“What ain’t like what?” Scootaloo asked, earning a giggle from Sweetie Belle.
“Would the two of ya jus’ drop it already?! Honestly, what is with the two of ya?”
“But it’s funny,” Scootaloo said.
“And you two do make a cute couple,” Sweetie Belle told her, earning a confused look from Scootaloo. “What? They do.”
“Well, we ain’t a couple!” Apple Bloom said. She noticed somepony behind her two friends. The pink filly in question, sitting with her friend Silver Spoon as she giggled about something. A grin crossed Apple Bloom’s muzzle. “In fact, ah’ll prove it,” she said as she turned to the empty table beside her. On it was a plate with some uneaten peas and a spoon. She grabbed the spoon, scooped up some peas, and took aim.
Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon were enjoying themselves, despite their little argument earlier. After somehow getting separated from Babs and Alula, the two decided to follow the ship’s maps to find the dining room and order some ‘Canterlot cake’, an expensive cake that, as the name implies, is unique to the city of Canterlot.
While there, they even managed to strike some conversation with some of the ponies that recognised the two from knowing their fathers. In particular, Sir Fancypants himself had invited them to join him for tea the following morning. Needless to say, the two were excited beyond words.
“This cruise is turning out better than I ever dreamed it would,” Diamond said as she took another bite of her cake, her face beaming at the rich taste and soft, fluffy texture.
“I agree,” Silver Spoon said. “I can’t wait to tell father that I actually met Sir Fancypants!”
The two fillies squealed in excitement together, though it was short-lived. Something hit Diamond’s forehead, causing her to flinch. She looked down at the table to find peas, and then looked back up again, just in time for Apple Bloom to fire the next load.
Diamond Tiara ducked out of the way, then slammed her hoof onto her table. “What does that blank flank think she’s doing?!” she asked as she scooped up a small portion of cake onto a spoon and prepared to fire. “I’ll show her not to mess with me!”
The dumbwaiter door opened, and Babs and Alula quickly jumped out, glad to be breathing air once more.”Next time,” Alula said, “I’ll lead the way.”
Babs could only nod in agreement, before a loud voice shouted from behind her: “Hey! What are you two fillies doing back here?!”
The two turned around to see an angry chef looming over them, a rolling pin in his hoof as he cast a menacing glare over the two fillies. “Uh… Eheheh… Um, hi?” Alula said, putting on her warmest smile.
“This is a restricted area!” the chef shouted, ushering the two fillies out by using his rolling pin to nudge them. “Come on! Out out out!”
“Okay, okay!” Babs said as she and Alula ran out of the kitchen together. “Sheesh. No need to bust an artery.”
“Hey, I see the Crusaders over there!” Alula pointed towards the three fillies sitting together at a table in the distance. “Come on. Let’s go join them.”
“Sounds good ta me,” Babs said as she followed after Alula, licking her lips as she looked at all of the delicious-looking foods around her. As they neared the location where the Cutie Mark Crusaders were sitting, something hit Babs’ head, causing her to jump before lifting a hoof to examine what it was. “… Cake?” Babs looked around for the source of the sudden cake assault, and found Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon looking her way with nervous looks on their faces, and a piece of cake on their table. Babs glared. “Oh, it is on.”
Babs jumped up and grabbed a hoofful of cake from the table behind her, closed one eye to aim, and threw the cake through the air and towards Diamond Tiara.
Diamond saw the incoming cake and ducked out of the way. Meanwhile, the two door behind the pink filly opened, and in walked…
“Sorry I’m so late,” Blueblood said as he entered. “I had some business that I had to attend t-”
SPALAT!
The entire dining room fell silent.
“Is it really okay to leave them on their own like that?” Cheerilee asked as she took another shot beside Trixie.
Trixie was busy focussing on the pool game to her right, a shot glass in her hoof, ready to drink whenever a ball was sank. Unfortunately, the two playing were the worst pool players in existence, and thanks to that the showmare was still sober. “Ah, they’ll be fine. What’s the worst that could happen? They’re nearly ten now, right?”
“Most of them are nine. Babs and Diamond are ten,” Cheerilee told her.
“Then like Trixie said, they’ll be fine.”
Trixie felt something tugging her tail, and leaned back to look under the counter. There, she found Scootaloo hiding, wearing a trenchcoat, a pair of shades, and a hat. “Hey, we need the room key!” Scootaloo whispered.
“What?” Trixie asked. “What are you doing? And why are you wearing all that?”
“No time! We need a place to lay low, quick!”
Cheerilee sighed as she also leaned back to find the Pegasus filly under the counter. “Scootaloo, what did you do?”
As if to answer Cheerilee’s question, the doors burst open at that moment, and in walked a smartly-dressed, well-groomed stallion… with cake on his head and running down the side of his face.
“Has anypony seen a group of disruptive little fillies in here recently?!” Blueblood shouted, veins showing on his head and anger filling his voice.
Trixie and Cheerilee quickly shook their heads. “No,” Trixie said, reaching into her cape and pulling out their room key with her magic and giving it to the filly. As Blueblood turned to leave, Scootaloo used her swiftness and her agility to sneak out through the other end of the bar.
“… You were saying?” Cheerilee asked.
Trixie sighed and ignored the shot glass, instead reaching for the bottle itself. “And this is only the first day… Celestia help me.”
“Well don’t say I didn’t warn you,” Cheerilee said as she took the bottle from Trixie’s hooves. “And, unfortunately, us teachers must drink in moderation whenever we’re on duty. Even on trips.”
“… Trixie doesn’t want to be a teacher anymore.”
“Too late. Deal with it.”
Three days of fun-filled chaos passed. The Cutie Mark Crusaders, the two rich fillies, and Alula all had the times of their lives. Princess Celestia declared the trip a booming success. Cheerilee had issued out many apologies, Trixie had overworked her magic assisting her class in their quick escapes, and Prince Blueblood… started a petition to ban Ponyville from participating in Canterlot events. Thankfully, with Fancypants refusing to sign, the petition did not achieve enough signatures to pass.
And so, life continued as normal for the next three weeks. Babs Seed had returned to Manehattan, school had started up once more, and the theatre house’s business had shot up thanks to the smashing success of the fillies’ play.
Trixie Lulamoon counted out the bits earned from the day’s performance and added them to the bits earned from selling refreshments at the bar. “Here’s your pay for today,” Trixie said as she hoofed a bag of bits to Berry Punch, who happily snatched them away and trotted her way towards the door.
“Great! Saturday night, here I come!”
“It’s Fri-” Berry Punch was outside of the door before Trixie could finished what she was saying. “… Well, whatever, she’ll figure it out. Or, she’ll be so drunk it won’t even matter anyway.”
Trixie glanced up towards the clock above her head. School was going to be over in five minutes, assuming Cheerilee was as punctual as a certain lunatic Alicorn that lived in the library. “Guess Trixie had better prepare for the newcomers… After a quick drink.” Using her magic to grab a bottle and open the top, Trixie brought the bottle to her mouth and prepared to drink…
“HI MISS TRIXIE!”
Trixie lost her magical focus and dropped the bottle to the ground as she jumped, clutching her chest with a forehoof as she took deep breaths. She turned around to see three very familiar fillies standing behind her.
“W-What are you doing here?” Trixie asked. “School should still be in session.”
“We got ta leave early,” Apple Bloom explained. “For doin’ so well on our tests.”
“We came here with the others. They’re just being a bit slow,” Sweetie Belle said.
Within the next five minutes, many excited fillies and colts took the theatre house by storm. If Trixie thought that seven foals were difficult… “I think I’m starting to regret this…”
“C’mon, let’s start!” Alula said as she pulled on Trixie’s foreleg.
“Er, right…” Trixie looked around at the many energetic fillies and colts storming around the theatre house, some of which were chatting with each other rather than paying their new teacher any notice. “Alright, time to start our first class!” A few foals stopped to look at Trixie, but the majority were still speaking. ‘Celestia help me…’
“QUIET!” The theatre house fell silent. All eyes fell on Diamond Tiara, who turned to Trixie with a smug grin on her face.
‘Or, that.’ Trixie cleared her throat and looked over her eight new students. She asked them to introduce themselves one-by-one.
Berry Pinch. She seemed calm and stable, especially when compared to her mother.
Archer. Another Scootaloo. Trixie could already feel the migraine coming along.
Rumble. He was shy and quiet. An angel among demons.
Shady Daze. Trixie almost failed to notice him.
Twist. Liked to hoof out free sweets. Trixie could already sense where that would lead.
Dinky Doo. Cute, but clumsy.
Snips. Trixie shuddered.
Snails. Trixie shuddered more.
“Well then,” Trixie said, looking over her eight newbie students, and her six ‘advanced’ students and assistants with getting the newcomers up to speed. “Welcome to Trixie’s Class of Theatrical Arts. Let’s begin with the basics, shall we?”
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Oh boy. This career is gonna be one heck of a fresh start.
Am I the only one who had a vision of Celestia rubbing his hooves together and cackling like a maniac during the entire cruise?
3271156 no no, that's what Luna was doing.
Oh boy. Snips and Snails. Those are winners, right there.
Bravo! Very cute and fun, excellently done.
Great ending to a very fun story.
I´m so proud of them.
Go for a detective/mysterie play next Trixie, Scoots would be the perfect false acoused hero.
The ABxDT thing gives me the daaaaaw´s.
It ain’t like that!
Yeeeaaah, right.
And another great end to another great story by you, good sir, madam, or thing. If only I was a word engine like yourself, but alas, I am not.
Next story for my consumption please.
Ah, what a great ending.
Sir Fancypants?
You know, I sympathize with Blueblood in this.
Is it so much to ask that ponies not act like destructive idiots?
What? No Button Mash? What is this?
BRAVO! BRAVISIMO!
No wonder I LOVE your Trixie stories. You write her with such different personalities, and yet none feel OOC.
Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, children of all ages, Trixie's a teacher now and she's not here to teach magic. No, she's here to teach the performing arts. More specifically, she's here to teach theatre, which I guess her experience in the secondary field of stage magic somehow qualifies her to do. Naturally, her class consists of a group of rambunctious fillies of varying degrees of popularity to challenge her patience and teaching skills to their fullest potential. Will she be able to pull it off? Generally, comedy would dictate no, but yes can work if we're looking to have an emotional payoff.
The first and main thing that struck me about this story was its large cast. We have the CMC, Diamond and Silver, Alula, Babs, and Trixie all playing significant roles in the story with the Mane Six and additional cast taking side roles. As the main character, Trixie's significance in the story is a foregone conclusion, but with the inclusion of seven other fillies in the spotlight alongside her, the danger of the clone entourage comes into play. Since the story is very character driven, I think the best way to go about reviewing it is to cover each of the seven fillies, bringing up some of the strong and weak points for each.
First, we have our lead fillies, Diamond Tiara and Apple Bloom. Their characterization was standard Yukiverse, but their main role in this story comes from their conflict, which revolves around the kiss they have to perform on stage and their reluctance to do it. Honestly, if this conflict wasn't in this story I would have assumed it to be there anyway, but despite my expectations, the execution of the conflict was handled well. Diamond and Apple Bloom don't want anything to do with it from beginning to end, but the enticement of the cruise and requirement of the class give them believable reason to go through with it, ethical issues aside. You had a slight hiccup of redundancy in relation to this conflict with them asking if the kiss was necessary. You had two separate mentions of ponies asking this question only for Trixie to give the exact same response both times. If you're going to have the same argument twice, something new needs to come of it the second time. Otherwise, it's the equivalent of asking your reader to reread a previous section in the story. Also, I noticed that Trixie made a comment about Apple Bloom's accent holding her back but said nothing about Babs's. I can't imagine one's harder to understand than the other.
Next, there's Sweetie Belle, the only character to really get an entire chapter about solving her problem. As expected, she has stage fright and has to overcome it. When it comes to dealing with stage fright in fiction, I'm most familiar with tricking the pony into singing in front of a large crowd and using the placebo effect. You went with a hybrid between the latter and having Rarity talk her up and boost her confidence. I think it was simply and effectively done, even if it was basically all that Sweetie Belle had to contribute to the story.
Then we have Silver Spoon, the filly who must be heard not seen. Silver Spoon served the important role of being Trixie's assistant, and from the sound of things, she took her job seriously and worked diligently despite her mild clumsiness and short attention span getting in the way at times. However, from the looks of it, well, there's really nothing to see. Silver Spoon doesn't get her own chapter or have a real issue to resolve. She just was Trixie's assistant and did her job well. Not really anything worth writing a lengthy review about. Now that's not to say she needed to have a problem to be important to the story, but she at least could have helped or been involved in someone else's conflict so that we got to see her doing something. Mainly, we needed to actually see how Silver Spoon did as an assistant and in rehearsal rather than just having Trixie talk about it. You know the drill. Showing beats telling every time.
Babs had about half of a chapter to resolve her conflict, but hers had much more uniqueness to it than the others. She's developed a fear of acting because she's afraid she will turn into what she acts as. It's a very interesting idea, and personally I think you could have gone so much further with it than having Applejack simply tell her she was wrong. You could have easily had Babs start to falsely believe she was turning into the character she was playing, resulting in either conflict for Trixie, comedic effect, or a combination of the two. At the very least, Babs stood out in this story. She didn't feel like part of the group you'd refer to as "the rest".
As for the rest, we have Scootaloo and Alula. Like Diamond Tiara and Apple Bloom, they shared the same conflict. However, unlike Diamond Tiara and Apple Bloom, their conflict did not require two ponies for it to work. They just happened to have the same problem, which means if one of them were to be tossed into an empty void, the integrity of the story would remain unharmed. However, the void is unnecessary in your case, because all they really needed was a role in the story outside of forgetting their lines. Scootaloo did absolutely nothing significant outside of that until she got on the cruise, and even then she was just one of the fillies there causing havoc.
As for Alula, you gave her the strongly implied crush on Diamond, but the only payoff that came from it was it being the hook that gets her to remember her lines. She had plenty of time and potential to interfere and get in the way of Diamond and Apple Bloom's conflict, but all that she did about it was give Apple Bloom an angry glare after the fact. Her interest in Diamond didn't affect the story any more than she did, which gave it the feel of an inside joke rather than an element in the story.
Though I've never read your interpretation of Trixie before, I think it works about as well as your interpretation of Diamond. She has an ego and a temper about her, and you make her out to be sneaky and manipulative at times to counteract her tendency to blunder. Her main desires seem to be success and acclaim, which come across very clearly during the big production and the effort she puts into the rehearsal, and the singlemindedness in her goals comes seems genuine to her character. I suppose I would call Trixie's characterization this story's strongest aspect.
Nothing to say about mechanics. Random typos and misspellings here and there, but nothing damaging to the story. Standard quality. The story is nice and simple, though I feel at times it suffers from being too simple, causing some of its cast to be neglected and plot threads to pass by without much notice. I think if you integrated Scootaloo, Alula, and Silver into the plot and used their roles to shake up the formula a little, the story would feel so much more complete, even with its open ending.
I see this story as a box of those fruit flavored snacks shaped like cartoon characters. They taste good and they're fun to eat, but there's always certain characters that you just never seem to get.
Make the most!
I think you should send this into the show. I would make such an incredible episode!
Of course someone could get hurt, they're swords! Its kind of what they do.
I also like the way Trixie was annoyed by everyone telling her she cant use real swords.
Awesome story, and one I'll read again.
Glad I read this, could use a little freshening up... and chapters in the middle... But a really nice story all the same.
Snips. Trixie shuddered.
Snails. Trixie shuddered more.
O god no
3272578
He's been knighted.
Oh, well... Aside from questionable material... this is good. But, just because there is questionable material at all... you go into "Uncategorised". Next time behave
.