[Complete! With TVTropes apparently!]
Also, apparently, an animated trailer.

In a world of brass and steam, Twilight Sparkle had thought she had made a life-changing discovery with the invention of the telescope. For better or worse, she was correct.

Now her discovery has not only changed her life, but the lives of those she seeks out in her desperate attempt to contact the only other creature as lonely as Twilight herself.

It all would have been much simpler, but it had to be the one Twilight could only call The Mare on the Moon.

Decidedly not within walking distance, then.

[Featured on EQD before story was meant to be submitted. 4/03/2015]

[Editing team: Southpaw, Wolfvenom, Maskedferret, SwanSong and BluePaladin42, without whom this story would be a fraction of its current state.]
[Special thanks to Novel-Idea for the updated cover]

Caramel is tired of his cousins ragging on him for having a pegasus marefriend, so he proposes a drinking game for the three of them to play.

Edited by Noble Thought.

It took many long years and far more defeats than he'd care to admit, but at last—at long last—victory was finally within the great Ahuizotl's reach. Absolutely nothing, not even that meddlesome Daring Do, would be able to stand in his way any longer. Yet even with his arch nemesis facing her inevitable demise and the ultimate power literally in his grasp, he can't shake the feeling that he's forgotten about something.

One tiny, crucial detail. Something very important. As in, 'could easily ruin his plans if not attended to' important.

...

Eh, maybe he just left the oven on again.

Cadance and Night Light share a pleasant conversation in a café. Everything somehow manages to get really weird, really fast.

Proofread by Octavia Harmony and Selbi.

This story is a sequel to Twilight Verbs Article Nouns

Having defeated the scourge of news stories about her banal personal life, Twilight must now face a far greater and more embarrassing threat:

News stories speculating about her nonexistent love life.

She's beginning to get a little annoyed.

Not a one shot anymore, because reasons.

Twilight Sparkle is tired of this nonsense.

Every day, a slew of articles all focused on the minute details of her life invade her beloved newspapers. "Twilight Sparkle Eats Peaches." "Twilight Sparkle Hates Tea." "Twilight Sparkle Uses a Microwave." "Twilight Sparkle Makes Toast." All of it clogging up her precious sources of information from cities across Equestria.

But no more. The time has come to put an end to it, once and for all.

Written with thanks to Marceline from the #FimFiction IRC and for no good reason other than it sounded funny in my head.

There is a reason why Twilight used the phrase ‘works every time’ to describe the want it, need it spell. Her data says it has an approximately 99% success rate, but it used to be 100%.

Previous Episode: Twin Twilights
Current Episode: Season Zero — Episode Three
Next Episode: Episode Four: Twilight Frankenstein

Twilight looked over to her dear mentor, Princess Celestia, and found she had once again fallen asleep mid-lesson. Her intense debate on awakening the princess was cut short when the decision was taken out of her hooves.

“Huh? Oh. Twilight, I am so sorry for falling asleep again. I think we need to reschedule this for tomorrow morning.”

Twilight nodded. After all, Princess Celestia was obviously overworked. If only there was something she could do to help.

Now with a dramatic reading courtesy of DRWolf.
Additionally, there’s a Spanish translation by Spaniard Kiwi over on Deviant Art.

Current Episode: Season Zero – Episode One
Next Episode: Twin Twilights

Art created from images by Tim015 and ShilaDaLioness.

While sharing an intimate moment, Celestia and Twilight Sparkle have a little chat.

Cover art swiped from Longinius.

Dramatic reading by Monanniverse.

French translation courtesy of inglobwetrust.

On top of her universal magical talent, teleportation was Twilight's specialty. With her newfound Alicorn power, even vast distances would be within her reach. She was so certain that there was nowhere they would find themselves other than their destination, she even offered to teleport herself and Celestia all the way to the Crystal Empire, together.

Of course, nowhere is exactly where they find themselves.

For a week.

(Oneshotober 2014)