This story is a semi-sequel to Twilight Sparkle and the Crystal Heart Spell (pdf)
Same continuity as The Queen of the Dark.
Once upon a time, there was an evil enchantress called Prismia. Only one special little pony could stop her.
Chapters (1)
Forcalor
Joined 12th Feb, 2023 ·
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I enjoyed your use of perspective in this story. There are the flashes of inner monologue, and also the song, which helped me to be in Prismia's brain without being in her brain, so to speak. I was more interested in her than I was in Cadence. She has a more urgent purpose. What she feels, I think, are the things that matter to you. With her you are searching. And you have a characteristic way of setting the personal against a grand backdrop of events. It would be great to see that side of your voice continue to develop.
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Thank you for your thoughts. I think there are many brilliant people in the world who did not live up to their potential because of the vices, doubts, pressure of society, and general misunderstanding. At first I presented the story as a fairy tale because usually they do not get to be saved by magical, supernatural children, but maybe it was a bit too cynical
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If it feels like a fairy tale to you, try looking for some specificity with it. That's one thought that I had with Prismia. Give me an example of doubts, pressures of society, etc.; or rather, share your experience with me. Find a way to do it, that is.
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Well, I've meant to explicitly present it like a fairy tale, but all that remained from that idea is basically only a song. All that stuff was just implied here, to not break the flow. I might return to the character of Prismia in the future and discuss it a bit more with her, though
This is depressing for a very.... Lol stupid reason. (My fault)
I was vaguely familiar with Prismia when I wrote her story. I'm pretty sure your representation of her is a heck of a lot more accurate and that is depressing. She was this... lamentable? I don't like it. (Not your representation, but the canon version of her.)
Regardless, this is very well written and interesting.
I have a feeling I'm missing out on some of your... flavor choices because I'm on phone.
I also would say though, this feels more like a Prismia story rather than a Cadance one. If that was your intention then it came through.
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I think Cadance will get enough spotlight in my works anyway
But, what Prismia could potentially represent, needed to be discussed too. I think consensus in fanon is kinda that Cadance just 'hugged it out' from Prismia, lol
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https://youtu.be/QHJj9ZL7SMU
The best way to solve any problem.
Fantastic read, Forca. Now this is word mastery, in my eyes. I absolutely love the opening limericks. And that whole bit with the end, starting with her crossing the fire... Visualizing it was very fun.
In all honesty, I'm still not very well-versed in all things MLP (barely finishing up the show, half way through season nine now). So I had to sit down and read the Crystal Heart Spell before I gave this one a go. Took longer than expected due to my limited time and shifting priorities.
But I'm glad I got to finally read something of yours. Few are as eloquent and genuinely appreciative of the written and artistic artform as you are. And now I know why! Your own writing is fantastic.
I may be the type of person that clings onto a single Rating as a choice, since wholesomeness is my calling... but I'll definitely have to keep an eye out for you and your work.
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I humbly thank you for your words and high praise.
I can say the same about you, I admire your work and effort!
I can't say that my writing is really fantastic, or even if the 'Promising Cadence' is indicative of it overall. For me, it was more of an experiment, but it certainly touches on themes that I want to discuss. I am glad you've enjoyed it, however, and even followed! If you do not shy away from thriller-esque stuff and high/dark fantasy writing, then I hope I won't disappoint
I love seeing fan treatments of this moment! It's super dramatic and deserves so much more than an offhand reference in the chapter books.
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Oh hey, you are a huge inspiration
I am humbled by your attention, thank you! And yeah, this moment can be so much more, just as Cadance can be a multifaceted and deep character in her own right
I'm in love with the fairytale-style writing of this. It's very dreamy and sweet in a way I don't see very often. The introductory 'song' did a lot to set the mood, and I'm forever impressed by people that can pull that type of writing off
Anyways, this is a wonderful rendition of Cadance's backstory and its both suitably saccharine for her character and shares the type of prose ive come to expect from the small amount of stories i've read from you so far. Something I noticed and especially liked was the language used by the characters- either young Cadance's repetition and sing-songy way of speaking, or how the story hints that the timeframe of this particular Equestria seems to be a "long time ago"
All in all i loved this. 10/10 dashies
This story is unusual in fimfic and in general, in having a lengthy section that's a poem of some actual quality (and which serves well as part of the story.)
Although to a VERY limited extent the poem reminds me of Doctor Seuss's "The Grinch Who Stole Christmas," in the general theme of a villain who seems to enjoy stealing the joy from a town, and in the fact that it references "Whoovesville"...I'm grateful that you gave us such an original take on this villainous theme in such an interesting poem.
Thanks again!
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