• Member Since 28th Dec, 2011
  • offline last seen 1 hour ago

ThePhantomAssassin


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Comments ( 150 )

What do you have alot dislikes?

i must say that was thoroughly enjoyable.

I liked this it was good

Very well written! A few mistakes but easily fixed.
I think people disliked because of Jojo's name. :twilightangry2:

1347797 Yeah. I know, I'm awesome! :rainbowdetermined2:

1347825 No idea. I just wish they would let me know why.

1347878 I'm glad you enjoyed it!

1347922 I think it's awesome you though so!

1348075 I put a fair amount of work into this. I tried avoiding using the same words for the same thing twice ya know what I mean? I can't for the life of me figure out why they wouldn't like Jojo. It's not even his real name! I says so right after Ditzy says his name, that it's not his real name, just a nickname Ditzy came up with and how your real name was something else. In case you were wondering why, it's because J0HNS0N hasn't really come up with any name other than Jojo, but for lack of a better one, we went with this, because after a while, he grew to dislike it.

I wish the people who disliked the story could at least tell me why!:fluttercry: God damn trolls did it cause her name isn't Derpy that's what I bet the problem is :twilightangry2:

Not gonna like or dislike this, but I will say one improvement you could make is all the parenthetical remarks (like this). One or two of them were kind of funny, but really they acted as more of a distraction than anything. Just sayin'.

1348438 Some of them are there to explain certain things that might confuse people who over think things way to much, but I'll see what I can do.

Manly Tears. :ajsmug: That was awesome man, I feel so honored! Thank you for writing this for me it was an awesome surprise! Your an epic friend, Iv always told you not to repay me but this was worth so much more than simply paying me back. :yay:

I can't Believe it...Derpy shipping...YOU ARE A CHAMPION MY FRIEND!:rainbowkiss::twilightsmile::yay::moustache::pinkiehappy::eeyup:

1348742 Haha! Thanks man!

1348746 I'm glad you liked it. Drunk Ditzy is best Ditzy!

Sometimes you exchanged 'to' in place of 'too', and I don't plenty understand so much author comments in the middle of the most "important" parts.

Anyway good job!

1348937 Yeah, I've gotten that a few comment saying that. I'll take. Look and pull them. Thanks for the input!

1348306 I know what you mean. 100 people have read my story and not a single like/dislike or even a comment since I last changed it and people are still reading it.
DAMMIT INTERWEBS! WHY U NO SAY STUFF??
\:twilightangry2:

This story made me want to make an account on this site. This story is amazing. I will say this though some your comments confused me when I was reading.

Do you think that you will do a follow up story because i'd love to read it.

1350917 Yeah, I plan on going through and getting rid of some of those.

Thanks for the feed back, glad to see some morr people liked my story :twilightsmile:

I feel quite honored that you made an account just to tell me about my story:twilightblush:

Dawwww, that's cute, you sir deserve a follower

1348438
1348937
1350917

Allright. I fixed it! Should be all better now.

Also was she raped or whats the story with that(also sorry that didn't come out the way it sounded in my head)

and is Dark Glider making fun of me

No problem, and next time you make a 2nd person fic, make sure you don't make any specifications about the pony we will be playing as, it allows us to place our OC's into the fic. Causing 'most' of us to make it better for ourselves

need moar u should write a squeal :derpyderp2:

1351210 Yes. But not by Jojo. Dinky's father did.

1351288 "Your" name wasnever mentioned. Just a nickname Ditzy called "you". So you can put your OC in this easily.

1351372 I was thinking about it. If this bitch hits the featured box I will.

1351436
the story was just so good and in this one the stallion was actually good i loved it:pinkiehappy:


I didn't mean was she raped by jojo. I ment in her past. The reason i ask is cuz she seemed uneffected by it or was quick to open up to jojo at least.


also I think he means dont give a physical description of the main character

1351475 It means a lot to read what you typed about my story. :')

1351478 Well, he opened up first. I suppose she did open up a little fast, but looking back on the story, it feels right with all the emotions getting tossed around. Not to mention they knew eachother for a long time.

Also, seems legit. Forgot I described him to xD

Nice story, clopable, you deserve a thumbs up, my friend

bravo my fine sir, very well written. but i have to say, some grammar issues. but not to many other than that it is very well written iambrony.steeph.tp-radio.de/mlp/gif/131489059457.gif?1318143690

1351938 Thanks bro!

1352195 Well, guess I'll have to go over it again with a fine tooth comb. Glad you liked the story otherwise!

Nice story! Very funny :rainbowlaugh: Even better you did it all for a bro. Have a mouchstache! :moustache:

I know what the sequel is going to be about: Dinky saw.

Very first sentence is in present tense, second is in past... not a good sign :applejackunsure:

Finished, it's kinda meh... too... perfecty... that's the only word I got.

no, what i meant was you gave a description of the O.C. in this fic, my oc is a pegasus, not an earth pony, and he is grey, and black, not blue,
that is, alas, all in all, great fic still

Worthy of a thumbs-up, but there are still plenty of problems to be fixed. Well, "problems" is perspective, but i can't imagine there are many that like the inner monologue thing you were doing with the parentheses. It really takes one out of the moment. One second, hot sexxins, the next, someone's telling me about how their not going to write a story that involves spanking. At that particular moment, I'm dreadfully disinterested in whether or not your going to write a story about whatever. Maybe later, i'd find this factoid interesting, but not when i'm trying to read a fic. This was a problem in multiple places, where you break the illusion of the story with some random, unrelated thing. It's like trying to watch a movie in a theatre while someone behind you is talking on their cell phone.

But considering what really matters, that is, the story; good stuff, many thumbs, hope to see more.:ajsmug:

1352397 :unsuresweetie:

1352485 He deserves it. Interesting fact, I tried to keep is srrs face, but found myself unwilling.

1352529 I was thinking more along the lines of them actually vandalizing Diamond Tiara's house, but that could be funny to!

1352892 HERP! KK I fixeded it. Also, what do you mean perfecty? Not enough conflict?

1353013 Yeah, someone brought that up. Forgot about that xD

1353148 Yeah, thought I grabbed all those things that people seemed to be complaining about. I missed one or two it seems. I went through it again and pulled the ones during the sexy times. With as many people that have been asking for more, I think I might just write a second chapter. I'm glad you enjoyed it, if so much as one person enjoyed my story, then I know my job is done. Well, done per-say anyway xD

The you character is too perfect of a gentlemen, and yes there's no conflict so it comes out as kinda boring.

Some spelling mistakes like dizty instead of ditzy xD and a little to many comments..
But I really enjoyed this story!

lol good to know im not the first to notice, that would be a little mean of me, but oh well

1353805 It's more of a clopfic that has a little romance before the sexy times, to much conflict would've turned this into something that isn't a one shot.

1354003 horeey shet. More stuph to fix? And that is gonna be a bitch of a mistake to find...

i dawed so hard at the end :heart:

:rainbowhuh:Incomplete??

1390693 Lots'o people liked this, so I figured why not keep going? I'm not sure how long it's going to be, but I'm going to make sure there is some more.

If you could capture this moment in all its glory, it would be worth nine-thousand and one.
HO HO! I SEE WHAT YOU DID THERE! (.jpg!)

hmm interesting...... mostly skipped over the sex scene (the actual sex part gets kinda bland story after story :/ ) but it was well writen. nice job phantom. i'll give it a like or thumbs up or whatever the buck you call it here.

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