• Member Since 17th Jan, 2012
  • offline last seen Dec 28th, 2017

theswimminbrony


I love to swim, write, and waste my hours away on this site.

T
Source

Princess Luna is having trouble falling asleep, and she soon discovers why—she is in the company of an old accomplice. But what this being's intentions are and what they seem to be are two very different things...

Chapters (1)
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Comments ( 40 )

I like it... I like it a lot.

1207353
I'll try to do a reading of it, if that's ok with you.

1207696 Go right ahead, mate! Send me a link when you've finished, I'd love to see it.

Hhmm,interesting concept.:derpyderp2:

Great job! I love this one! I haven't really found that many good Luna fictions lately. Thankfully, you came with this one, and you have now earned my like and favorite for this story. Keep up the good work.:ajsmug:

From hell, to you, and back again,
Soto Konoha

*Reads fic*. *Becomes amazed* *Chalks up to be next backup fic on Reading Rainboom* :moustache:

Nightmare moon has an existential crisis...

Ib4 featured
I'm calling it

1211982 It was indeed a good one... Don't think EqD will take it though, because "We already have tons of stories about Luna and her past" so they say.

*mutters* :trixieshiftleft:

1212041 Wow... That is a ridiculous excuse.:facehoof: They are probably just making stuff up now to reduce their work load so they can slack off.:trixieshiftright:

1212093 I wrote a luna fic myself about her past and etc. That's basically what they told me. "Oh, we can't accept this because it's been done too much before"

Here's a blog post link with the letter they sent me: Link

1212041 If it's DIFFERENT they will take it. If it is DERIVATIVE, they will not.

1212126 Oh yeah, I still have to read that. I will probably stop writing my story right now to read it because I have plenty of time, and my story is a very basic idea, so I can't forget it so easily. I will leave you a comment on it, like I do all stories, and let you know about my thoughts on the story. Knowing that ED liked the story, I know I am going to like it.:ajsmug:

Wow....that actually gave me chills. Nightmare Moon still tormenting Luna, driving her back towards insanity.....
Heavy stuff.

1212237 They didn't accept it though, and said that if I wrote with the same quality on a different topic it would only have a 50/50 shot. But ooook then.... :applejackunsure:

Oh, Luna... :fluttershysad:

Great writing. :twilightsmile:

An amazing story, too much suspense parts, i love it :yay: But...what does Twilight had to do with all this? Pardon my inattention :twilightsheepish:

what did we just leave on?

1482058 We left on something that is completely up to your own interpretation, and something that may or may not be foreshadowing to a fic that I may or may not write in the future.

Like humans, ponies need to sleep at night. And like us, some of them may have the insomnia. Sadly, even Luna could not avoid this.

She wants to forget that time when she was a Nightmare Moon. She has realized what had she done and now harsh that was. But not everypony can simply escape from his or her own memories. They are torturing her. She tries to sleep but the vision comes to her dream and prevents her from rest.

Fortunately, Princess Celestia will help her to forget that unpleasant memories. This is what Luna needs the most.

Good night, dear princess. Sleep well.

theswimminbrony, good job! I listened to this story at Reading Rainboom. It helps to feel the ponies' emotions.

PresentPerfect
Author Interviewer

I heard this on Reading Rainboom. By the end of that first paragraph, I was all set to hate this, but it ended up impressing me in ways I did not expect. I mean, Luna's conversation with the Nightmare went in very interesting directions, but it was that ending that blew my mind, despite its seeming disconnect from the rest of the story. How much did you know about season 3 when you wrote that?

1598758 To be honest, I'm not entirely sure. I want to say I wrote this around the time the two songs from the premiere were revealed, but my memory's a bit foggy. However (and I really hate to detract from your enjoyment of the story), I didn't have any intentions of this linking with anything from season three when I first wrote this. I left the ending open on purpose so that it would be up to the readers to interpret what they thought it meant. I even had (and, to a certain extent, still do have) plans for another story in which the ending would serve as foreshadowing. The fact that it coincides with season three so well—I assume you're referring to Twilight's not-quite failure by entrusting the Crystal Heart to Spike—is pure coincidence, as much as I want to say that isn't the case. Again, I really hate to possibly be taking away that "wow" factor from you, but I hope you enjoyed it regardless.

One last thing... what was it about the first paragraph that you didn't agree with? Too cliche or verbose? I have a serious problem with writing good intros, so if you have any advice you'd be willing to offer, I'd be glad to hear it.

PresentPerfect
Author Interviewer

1601616
"Inside, she was the Queen of Solitude, The Duchess of Darkness, the Lady of Shadows."

THIS IS EMO POETRY

Worse, it doesn't fit Luna's characterization over the remainder of the story. She's not being moody or mopey, she's got a legitimate problem, can't sleep, and is thus affected by it.

And yes, it's the whole "she's supposed to fail the test" thing. It's like you reached into the future and pulled that out to plunk into the ending. Given the way the episode went, you could quite honestly set about exploring that now. Why did Celestia want Twilight to fail? I can think of some easy answers, but it's not my story! :)

1603641 Heh, yeah, I suppose that is sort of incongruous with the rest of the story.

I actually have been thinking about different ways to continue this story over the past few days that would make it fit in with season three. I've got quite a few possibilities written down, and I'll perhaps start writing on one of them soon. Then this story will really make me look psychic. :rainbowlaugh:

Thanks for the advice and the comments. I appreciate it!

that was damn good. kind of the nightmare moon story i've been wanting. thank you.:duck:

I really enjoyed this! So much suspense, I was sad when it ended though. :fluttercry:

I expected more... I mean, the story was great, amazing even.

But it just... ends, and I feel that ending is incongruous/clashing with the tone/pacing/plot that was set up before.

It was sad though, so I suppose perhaps a tragic ending is left to the imagination.

This, was a beautifully written story but the ending felt a bit out of place. However, since I a planning on writing a short story about Princess Luna, I suppose this is rather good. You have a great talent for writing and I think that this was written at the right pace, it wasn't too detailed and it conveyed the message it was meant to. It also adds another layer of Luna's persona and gives us a better of understanding of who she is. I`m glad you wrote this story and even though I am already a fan of yours I am most willing to give it a thumbs up and a fave. :raritywink:

A beautiful little story, keep writing. :twilightsmile:

We can't learn in the way your kind does; we act purely on instinct.

Uhm, no.

Nightmare is clearly a sentient entity, capable of carrying on complex dialog.

Something acting PURELY on instinct cannot speak. It cannot think. It cannot REASON.

6605179
Not wrong, but not completely right

I love Nightmare as a person and love seeing her in fics, but most of them involve her destruction or hate with no remorse.

9840971 Show me something nonfictional that can only act according to instinct which can yet carry on a conversation. Until then, I'm 100% correct in a factual sense.

9842015
Oh shit I thought you were dead

9842018 That which has no life can never die... :pinkiecrazy:

9842483
.... No quotes

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