Tracy spent his weekend as far away from his new apartment as possible, returning only when night came and slinking up to his room to sleep. It didn’t matter that figuring out how was getting a little easier (assuming he wasn’t just getting used to it). It wasn’t just about the discomfort; it was the principle of the place. Whatever demonic deal kept him living there, he would follow its terms as little as possible.
When Monday finally arrived, Tracy’s return from work brought the first real good news: the verification letter in his mailbox. He filled the thing out in his car, then stashed it in his glovebox for the next day. That’s everything I needed from the apartment. Where I live now doesn’t even matter, so long as I keep paying the Devil his due.
Would he really sleep in his car and eat at the work cafeteria for three months?
Yes, in fact. Goodbye horse curse. Goodbye insane roommate who thinks that Thanos is real. Enjoy your time in horse hell, I’ve just finished serving mine.
He didn’t even bother waiting until Rose would be at work to head inside, marching straight past her and up the stairs to his bedroom. It was still basically in cardboard boxes, which didn’t help the process. But he was too excited to care. He packed up his clothes first, enough that he felt confident no one at work would complain about the smell again. Toiletries, sleeping bag… what else did someone need to live out of their car?
He didn’t really bother trying to organize anything so much as he just crammed it into the bag as tightly as he could. He could always reorganize once he was settled in.
Tracy emerged from his bedroom dragging the bag more than carrying it. He didn’t even care that it had changed into a set of saddlebags and could probably be worn just fine on his back. He wouldn’t be back here, not until the nightmare of moving all that stuff when his contract was up. That was a problem for future Tracy, he wouldn’t dwell on it now.
Rose was still downstairs, slumped over a table scattered with papers and binders. There were bags under her eyes, as though she’d been working there all night and only his noise had startled her. “W-what?” She glanced between the bag and Tracy, confused. “Are you going camping or something?”
He nodded. “Yep. Extended stay automobile camping. Only the finest in illegal city squatting until this curse expires. Thank you for…” He shrugged one wing. “Well, you’ll probably have the place to yourself for a while. Hopefully a very long while. I guess that’s a good thing, right? More privacy, more house parties… whatever you’re into.”
He didn’t even wait for her response, turning for the inner door. A few steps later he was standing on the sidewalk, back on two legs.
Tracy smiled to himself, satisfied. The Devil had tried to steal his soul, but the Devil could be beaten. Too bad he didn’t have a fiddle; the entire process might’ve been faster.
His footsteps slowed as he reached the front of the car, noticing something tucked under the windshield wiper that certainly shouldn’t have been there. Someone with as little disposable income as Tracy knew well how to avoid wasting any of it on things like these. Yet here it was—a parking ticket. One he certainly couldn’t deserve.
“Parking in red zone,” said the ticket. Apparently the last two inches of his bumper counted as “parked” in the red zone. He wanted to crumple the sheet and throw it away—but that wouldn’t actually help. They had all his information now, and it wasn’t like he was leaving the city anyway. Well that’s sixty dollars I didn’t need I guess.
He tried to force a smile as he got back in, jamming the ticket away in a pocket. He was free of horse-land, it was still reason to celebrate! Just because there were a few bumps on the road to freedom didn’t mean he shouldn’t enjoy the relief soon to come.
He settled into the driver’s seat, ignoring the vibration in his pocket. He could worry about whoever was texting him later. He was free. How do I spend my human Monday night? Really it was just about finding a place to sleep, since he had to wake up for work the next day. That auto shop hadn’t cared he parked nearby, maybe he’d go there again. Tracy twisted the key. Instead of starting smoothly, the engine made a sound halfway between a scream of pain and a thousand gear shafts dying. Half the warning lights on his dashboard all came on, flashing at random.
Dammit. Tracy slumped into the steering wheel, so much the hard plastic deformed. What did I do to deserve this? His mind raced through the implications—he’d need to uber to work, which would mean even less money. Then there was getting his car fixed, and the ticket… why did all of this have to happen at once?
Maybe I can fix it myself?
He finally pulled out his phone, which still had a text message waiting on screen for him. It wasn’t from his friends back home, or even any of the new ones he was making at work. This one was… from his landlord?
“Friendly suggestion: Read the 24th section of the lease agreement. -D”
“Friendly suggestion: go fuck yourself,” he whispered into the empty car. He wasn’t quite brave enough to type it. The Devil was already screwing him, the least he needed right now was to piss him off.
This can’t be related, right? He probably just wants to make sure I’m going to pay rent on time or something.
He spent a few minutes searching for the specific pattern of warning lights on his dash, without much success. The cellular connection had been fine before, but just now he wasn’t getting much of a signal. After waiting nearly two straight minutes for a YouTube video to start playing—only for it to go back to buffering a few seconds later—Tracy finally slumped back into the seat.
If he can doom me to horse town, he might know something about this. I should probably check just to be sure. It wasn’t anything specific, just an assortment of entirely disconnected bad luck. Right?
His backpack was here, since he’d be using it at work. Tracy fumbled around with the zipper for a moment, before opening the back and pulling out the crumpled sheets of the lease.
There on the second to last page, in print so small he had to squint, was the 24th section. “Agent is entitled to use any means to ensure leasee utilizes the property as their primary residence, with an escalating level of severity as infractions continue. General misfortune and entropic acceleration will gradually escalate to illness, dismemberment, loss of major limbs, disorientation, disfigurement, and general destruction of means.”
“What the hell?” he texted back, hands shaking. “You can’t do this!”
“I already have,” came the response, almost instantly. “You signed it. I don’t suggest trying to manipulate your contract in any other ways, Tracy. I’m free to manipulate whatever I wish; it comes with the occupation. If you want the protection of your contract, honor it.”
Tracy smacked his phone down into the empty seat beside him, taking several deep, slow breaths. Of course he wanted to defy Discord’s command and flee his apartment anyway. There had to be some way for him to escape, right? That stuff was probably just there to scare him. Loss of major limbs, really?
But considering every other power this demon wielded against him, was it rational to think that things couldn’t just keep getting worse if he tried to run?
I don’t want to live in there, but so long as I’m still using it as my residence, he won’t do anything to me. It wasn’t what he wanted, but it wouldn’t be the end of the world. He just had to sleep there, and get his mail there. He could still avoid the apartment as much as he pleased.
He knew the instant I tried escaping. I really need to sit down and pick apart this contract. What else did I sign up for without realizing? But he wouldn’t sit out here and do it, or else things would probably keep getting worse.
Now I’m going to look like an idiot to that horse-girl. At least she was just a horse, so he didn’t care if she thought poorly of him. Obviously, because he didn’t.
Tracy groaned, then finally rose, gathering up all his crap and taking his short walk of shame back to the duplex. He hadn’t even locked the door, so it opened in seconds, a yawning maw opening wide to swallow his humanity whole. Yet sunlight streamed in from over there, almost painfully cheerful compared to the coastal smog on his side. I have to do a year of this.
People survived prison, didn’t they? They’d survived things even worse in some parts of the world. If they could do that without complaint, then Tracy could survive sleeping as a horse for a year. Either that, or declare a war I probably can’t win against a god.
He stepped through, feeling the strange rush as his body shifted down to four legs. It probably should’ve been an incomparable agony, changing that way. But whatever pain might’ve been expected, it didn’t come. And I don’t want it to start, do I? That contract did talk about loss of major limbs. In a way, that already happened. Every time he stepped through the door, he lost his hands, becoming basically crippled. Maybe he should do some research into how humans with a similar disability got things done.
Then he realized Roseluck was staring.
He hadn’t shut the inner door, after all. He hadn’t really cared what she thought, since leaving was his entire purpose. That meant she had a clear view straight down the hall to where he’d walked in from the world outside. She’d seen his actual face. At least she didn’t see me actually naked.
He spun back around, pulling the door closed and taking his time in locking it. He didn’t usually do that, but—maybe a little delay would stop her from screaming.
He turned, dragging the duffel bag back through the opening. “Car troubles. I’ll… have to call a mechanic, but they’re all closed already. Unless you know any good mechanics on your end.”
He stopped in the inner doorway, meeting her eyes with an awkward smile. Of course he didn’t really expect anything out of her, but asking was deeply satisfying anyway. Let her be the one to feel awkward for a change.
Roseluck stood, scattering papers from the table as she backed away from him. “I-I… you… outside…”
“Yeah.” He nodded over his shoulder. “That’s how the door works. I don’t want to call it magic, but I’m not sure what else it could be. Some kind of… Link Between Worlds.” He grinned, but apparently she didn’t care for references either.
“Oh.” She shivered, retreating a few more steps. “Y-you’re… you’re not a night guard?”
He shook his head. “God, no. What an awful job that would be. I might have gone to a crummy community college, but I still plan on doing more than that with my life.”
She turned, then darted for the door as fast as she could gallop. She didn’t stop to lock it on that side either—as far as he knew, that door didn’t even have a lock.
He watched her go, then turned back to the stairs. He still had to get all his stuff back up. And maybe I’ll read over that whole contract before bed, just to be sure.
Ah wonder if Rose will get 'em character growth where she becomes super desensitized to everythin.
Dun Dun Dun.
Then Tracy will make a pony babeh. Dun dun dunnnn. Hahahhahaha.
The worst part about this chapter is that I’ll have to wait a week for the next one.
Another great chapter!
Remember, Johnny probably still went to Hell for the sin of pride.
At first, I misinterpreted the "-D" as an odd emoticon rather than a signature. And really, it works as both.
What even counted as a minor—
Tracy cut off that line of thought the moment the answer came to him.
I have to appreciate the "probably" here. Keep up that optimism!
Wow, who'd have thought the extradimensional horse alien wouldn't be familiar with Nintendo games?
Both roommates are in for an interesting few hours. Tracy has a contract to pick apart and Rose may or may not send the entire town into a panic. We'll find out soon enough.
Nice
Yup, time to read the 'Fine Print'.
The closest 'mechanic' they have might be the local blacksmith.
Not sure whether or not that would be any help, though...
I'm sure she'll be back; with a vengeance.
Well, f*** you too, a**hole.
Tracy really is an unpleasant person. Just when I was starting to empathize with him.
I'm actually eager now to see what tortures Discord puts him through.
10148952
Cut him some slack. He's a dick, sure, but putting yourself in his shoes you'd also be on the same level if you didn't know what was going on.
That was a pretty comprehensive and somewhat tedious setup to say "you needed to live at this house to keep your job, you are stuck at this house with this roommate, and you are not going anywhere for a year." The story's over 18,000 words in, and Rose and Tracey have barely interacted so far, with the lion's share of the narrative's emotional heft being spent on Tracey being angsty and peeved.
There's frequently a lack of emotional complexity in the characters of these stories, and they tend to be locked into having just one at a time. This would be a great spot for improvement.
Step number immediate when you think you have made a contract with the devil: pour over it harder than a team of Apple lawyers!
Poor Rose is so stressed. Rather surprised she didn't just collapse.
Then really need to just sit down and talk...
Keep going! ;)
10148952
It took a week of antisocial treatment of his new roommate and flippant disregard for the contract for you to realize?
Why do you think Discord targeted him? And no, you can't tell us he wasn't selected, there's literal billions of others he could have picked from for this little "experiment".
Yeah, I knew it was never going to be that easy.
Yeah, well, Georgia does absolutely nothing for this particular Devil.
10148952
Eh, I think he's actually not that bad of a person on a whole, really. He's just...understandably more than a little grumpy due to his undesired circumstances. I probably would be too--heck, I'd imagine a lot of us would be were we in his (horse)shoes. So I think he should get at least a little slack. I mean, he's not excused from being rude to Roseluck of course, but he could also be way worse to her than he has too. At least he tries to humor enough to meet the bare minimum of conversation when she speaks to him or asks questions, and is really more just guilty of trying to avoid her, made easier that their work schedules already have them not crossing paths much as it is.
Honestly, if anyone's being an "a**hole" here, it's Discord...but that sort of goes without saying, doesn't it?
10148993
Starscribe's protagonists have a trend of veering towards the profoundly unsympathetic with somewhat alarming frequency.
I'm loving this story, and getting outright spoiled by the rate of updates.
10149015
Unfortunately this was the last daily. Next update should be on April 2nd.
Oh.
Anyway it's a good story so far.
10149006
Yeah, well, be that as it may, I still think Tracy isn't really as bad as some commenters are claiming. He at least deserves at least some slack for being a little cross all the time currently, seeing things are not going at all like he had hoped or planned and now has no way out of it that wouldn't make it all worse. He's more...justifiably annoyed...than anything else.
Again, he's admittedly been curt and distant to Roseluck thus far, but he's not really verbally abusing her either--he's tried to stop and explained things to her when he catches on she doesn't understand, like with the whole TV situation. Further, neither he nor her have had much chance to really get to know each other, and it's not totally because of any fault of theirs because again, the conflicting work schedules, and they've both been trying to respect each other's privacy for the most part.
Thinking back to the first chapter too, Tracy seemed a reasonable enough of a guy then, up until Discord came along and ruined his long term plans. So personally, I'd give Tracy a few more chapters to acclimatize and adjust to his circumstances first. If he's still acting kinda jerky then...then yeah, I won't dispute it.
10148956
Also, remember, the Night Guards in our world are different that the ones in Equestria as well.
It's indeed a good idea for him to actually read his contract so that he knows what deal he signed. It was naïve of him to think he could so easily escape the deal. I'm wondering if Roseluck is going to witness him changing into a human at one point.
I'm surprised he hadn't bothered to go through and read the rest of it after being surprised back when he first signed it. That sounds incredibly short-sighted after being blindsided the first time.
Now that quite a clause. I can't wait for Tracy to show this to Twilight/Fluttershy. I don't expect the contract to be overturned, but I think the fireworks might be mildly interesting.
Unless there's a clause in the contract forbidding that, too. Because of course there would be.
Tracy couldn't be more blatant about this even if he tried. This is going to be interesting.
Guess we're going to be seeing Twilight/Lyra/Bonbon soon?
10148952
To be fair, you can't really expect Tracy to know that "night guard" is basically on the opposite side of the "job respect" spectrum in Equestria. Being curt/rude/etc. when you're upset is also not exactly uncommon.
Also to be fair, talking down jobs is not exactly the nicest thing to do, either, although it can be quite commonly accepted depending on culture.
10149031
It's definitely natural to be mad, but it's rarely interesting or engaging to read about a character who is mad and doesn't have the agency to act on their anger.
Welp.
So much for much of anything.
I'm thinking, quite seriously, that someone is trying to play Cupid here. After all, you've basically got two people forced to live together for a year, with a massive "what's it like on the other side?" curiosity for both of them once the shock and horror wears off.
Not to mention what Tracy will be thinking once he tries flying, nor what Roseluck will think once she tries walking.
A flower seller, with a lot of new flowers from around the world?
A techie person with access to flight and magic?
Each of them with an eligible attractive single to show them around?
Did Cadence make a bet with Discord?
Gotta read the fine print, Tracy. Gotta read the fine print.
I'm really hoping all of this really is a bet between Discord and Cadance. You don't just challenge the lord of chaos like that. He'll Rube Goldberg his way to victory.
Nice to get that cleared up as soon as possible.
That's not normal screaming Roseluck. She couldn't cope with the revelation or seriously felt like she was in danger. Out-of-character can really be a scary thing. Though, I guess it doesn't matter to Tracy, this might lead her to either getting the guard or... enticing her further to pursue a relationship. Living life on the wild side.
10148880
More pony babehs. Can never have too many pony babehs. Lily and Daisy will agree.
10148952
He's been cold but I wouldn't say rude. Especially, not when from his view he's been hit with stuff that seems so utterly impossible and needlessly cruel. From someone he's convinced is the Devil. I figure he'll mellow out a bit when he cools off and realizes Rose isn't just a tool of Discord. Equestria is certainly strange to him but it's a very far cry from Hell. He's gonna learn that eventually.
10148986
From chapter 2:
He really wasn't first pick at least. Wonder what species would have been chosen before humanity? And why literally none of them have better sleep cycles since Tracy has his sleep hours literally on the opposite side (relatively) of the day as Equestria's. I'm pretty sure with all the personalities in the universe, you could do better (and worse) than Tracy. So the question is: why him?
10149200
We think it's similar to why Discord's meddling in A Chaotic Touch of Harmony did what it did, though admittedly he had much smaller of a role in it in that AU.
Once Tracy stops being so selfish he will be a great boon to the flower fillies...
Said it before, I’ll say it again. Discord, you scary!
Discord, the worlds best troll
10149084
Treason by thought eh? I mean he didn't do anything there that was a particular breach. All he did was remove some clothes(which he was going to take to a laundromat). Yes he had intentions of not going back in for a while, but the penalties shouldn't start accruing until (at least) when he didn't go back in the next day.
---
He should text that back to discord because he shouldn't be out car bills and the ticket at this point.
What I'm really curious about is why Discord's so intent on getting him to stay there. There has to be a reason, beyond screwing with the guy for kicks, right?
And maybe next time you read a contract through before you sign the gorram thing.
Idiot.
... Yes, because a creature from another world who did not even recognize a TV, is going to get video game references.
For all that he managed to take getting ponified and told to live in Equestria in a surprising amount of stride, he's not exactly quick on the uptake, is he?
10149084
10148993
10148956
10148986
10149200
Relax, everyone, I was half-joking. Half, because that line I quoted displays an internal conceit that is not a result of the situation, but a long-term disdain for people below his station. And you gotta admit, anyone who pre-judges someone due to their job is kind of a donkey's ass.
Anyway, I'm not actually wanting him to be tortured... Much. Just that from now on I will enjoy watching Discord twist the knife whenever Tracy tries to squirm.
There is no reason to like Discord here and his ever changing contract. Yes I believe his deliberate Fine print clause 24 of bodily harm was last second insert for his own lulz. Discord has thrown it in Tracy's face repeatedly at this point that the contract might as well be a fated script for Tracy's remaining life. The gods / spirits of the order domain are severely needed to punish Discord's arrogant ass over this.
Is Discord going to compensate him if Tracy loses the job? Dose Discord care his actions amount to theft of an employee to the company Tracy picked? Rhetorical I know, we already have the answer even to the splash damage of it.
10149639
We think of it like how a dungeon master will retaliate when players try to troll the game mechanics.
It's no fun if the ponies don't play the game. Discord's even trying to be (kinda) helpful! Consider this: He didn't need to provide internet, the portal didn't need to translate his stuff, roommate selection could have been much worse, heck, could have stuffed him in Tartarus.
We won't say he's doing this out of the goodness of his heart, but there is a method to the madness, and it's just Tracy's stubbornness that's causing him grief (whether he knows it or not), and this whole fic is how Tracy resolves that and comes closer to Harmony.
Of course, Book horse won't see it like that, you can guarantee; it will be interesting to see how Tracy reacts and gets dismayed when the contract is proven bullet-proof.
10149310
Sorry, I'm a little confused. What part of my comment were you responding to?
10149639
This can be depressingly common even for people on the same "rung". It's also kind of hard to avoid negative connotations with the phrase "unskilled labor".
10149310
Hmm, primary residence huh? Without the fine print screwing him anymore than he has been (because let's face it, the fine print might very well be fluid at this point), all Tracy has to do is simply spend slightly more than half his sleeping and free time there. But yeah, I'm surprised Discord took intention and not action to be a breach. No infraction has occurred, technically.
10149372
Probably the same reason he got Roseluck in there.
I wonder if there's anything in Roseluck's contract keeping her there. I'm assuming it isn't as crazy as Tracy's. She can technically follow Tracy's example (which she probably wants to by now) and sleep anywhere other than the property. It'll essentially have the same effect on Tracy in separating him (mostly) from Equestria and pretty much ruining Discord's fun.
10149777
People intend to do things all the time that they never actually do. I remember the twilight zone where one guy could read minds and one of the workers at the bank planned to rob it every day but would never do it.
Really liking this so far!
With the updates now moving to weekly, will the chapter lengths stay the same?
10149652
You can accuse Discord of many things in this story and you'd be absolutely right, but not that he's sabotaging Tracy's job. Tracy still having a job is Discord's one saving grace, because without his shenanigans, Tracy would be fired by now.
10149192
Cadance and Discord having a wager!? Even if that's not what happened here, that's a very good idea. Someone should use it.
Aw shucks, I am all caught up now. But I like how Tracy doesn't bother trying to hide anything. Let the pony deal with the weird and see how they react.
You had me spoiled, man. Started to expect a chapter a day. It's been two days now!
awesome story, very interesting, can't wait to read more ^^
10153481
Standard operating procedure on Starscribe stories. Publish stuff on Patreon over some time period, then publish 1 chapter/day on fimfiction until caught up with Patreon, then publish simultaneously on Patreon and fimfiction until complete.
Lets see, once a week means tomorrow morning, right?
10160456
Yep, it updates every Thursday from now on!
10148888
I didn't realize it was a signature until you said so.
I feel very attacked
-Literal Night Guard
10282620
Ah a fellow security officer, nice. Keep safe man, it's getting pretty hairy out there.
and that's it.
it doesn’t matter what is written in the contract - he can always remove or add a part, change the memory ..
The main thing is that the process must be interesting.
Considering what happened the first time you didn't read the fine print, you should be less than willing to not re-read the entire thing to to bottom to see what else you're deciding to ignore.