• Member Since 12th Jul, 2012
  • offline last seen Jun 22nd, 2019

PxDnNinja


T

Discord's magic goes crazy as he is turned to stone. Following this a new pegasus shows up in Ponyville with no past, no cutie mark, and no knowledge of flight, but a pure heart. How do the mane 6 handle this new pony, and how does he deal with this world he is in?


Cover Art was painted by a friend of mine here!
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Chapters (18)
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Comments ( 193 )

OOH nice. I definately want to see more. Will he be a trickster who only messes with those he thinks deserve it?:pinkiehappy: A sweet, caring, and gentle soul?:fluttershysad: Or perhaps an introspective and emotional sort who's at times, slow to act?:eeyup: I can't wait to find out!:raritystarry:

Hey hey. Thanks for kick starting the comments section. :pinkiehappy:

You will just have to wait and find out. :rainbowlaugh:

I am very intrigued...Onward!

Just an update. I am finishing up Chapter 3 entitled Introductions. Expect it to go up either tonight or tomorrow. It is my longest chapter by far and I am reviewing it a few times to keep typos and grammar mistakes at a low.:pinkiehappy:

"Don't worry about it Dash. I would have probably done the same thing and felt just as bad. We will call it even." He said in a friendly tone, but deep down knew he had to get revenge on the trickster somehow.

OOH! Do I detect a karmic trickster vibe?:pinkiehappy:

1001681 :rainbowlaugh: Not just you. Twilight is already fearing a duo of Dashs running around lol.

Excellent. Swift's personality is still a blank slate but that's good. That's exactly what he is: a blank slate. I am picking up some subtle trickster vibes though that's likely from what the slate's made from. Though, he does seem to be generally good natured and sweet from his early interactions with others. Overall, well done with the character.:twilightsmile:

At first I was :fluttercry:...but then I was :pinkiegasp::duck: Loveeee it ^__^

Good, only one obvious error I saw. "keep the right week(wing) folded". That aside, it's good.

1047244 Good catch. I try to proofread and stop as many errors as possible, but miss one here and there. Corrected it. :twilightblush::twilightsmile:

Just finished and I gotta say I'm loving it.matchmaker rarity is always a hoot and a half, the relationship between scoots and swift is haertwarming and the slowly growing relationship between dash and swift is cute. This is shaping up to be one hell of a story tho I'm a bit nervious about how and when the "chaos element" will come into play.

1086256 Thanks :twilightsmile: I'm glad you are enjoying it thus far. I'm especially happy that the relationships seem to be building well and the emotions are coming across well. As for the chaos element, you'll just have to stay tuned. :scootangel:

1086447harke is that the faint call of the elusive trollestia I hear? :rainbowlaugh:

1087875 Nope, no more clues for you :pinkiehappy: Just gotta keep reading :twilightsmile: Twilight demands it!

1087950 *bows* yes my lavander mistress, your will be done:trollestia:

1087950
If somepony is to demand something, it must be Pinkamena! SHE WANT'S TO BE RELEASED FROM HER MENTAL PRISON!!! :pinkiecrazy:

Wow, I just looked into groups and have added this story to the Rainbow Dash group. Maybe pull in some more readers and feedback. Guess I should actually use the entirety of the site rather than just the story section :pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy:

Its kinda funny trying to imagen dash doing that test lol:rainbowlaugh: and I gotta say your pegases naming theory is pretty damn interesing and cool:rainbowdetermined2:

1133973 Haha yeah I had similar thoughts when writing it. As I was writing the test part my Dash plushy was next to me and I swear I could hear her voice going "GOD I HATE TESTS! Why are for forcing Swift to do that too?! :rainbowhuh:" lol

As for the pegasi naming stuff, I just noticed it while watching the show that MOST of the pegasi have a name where the second part relates to them strongly (which is obviously intended, but with some ponies the first name worked more, with pegasi, the last was more consistent) and from their this whole part of the world built up.

Thanks for the continued interest and comments. I love when people leave comments here so I can hear from my readers. Glad you are still enjoying the story as well. :twilightsmile:

I usually skip over amnesia stories, but you've got my interest with this one. Possibly because Swift isn't angsting over it much and is a lot like Dash.

I wonder how they will react when they find out that Swift can use chaos magic. :moustache:

1144714 Should be by this weekend. I'm currently working on the next chapter :twilightsmile:

1134028 Thank you for sticking around and I'm glad you are enjoying it. As for Swift not angsting about it, like he said in the first couple of chapters, he can't remember anything, and with nothing taunting him for the past, it isn't something steady on his mind. Plus he likes to live in the moment like our favorite multi chromatic pony :twilightsmile:

1175199 Thanks :twilightsmile: I try not to have filler chapters that often, but this one ended up really feeling needed. I already have the first half the next chapter written and it is longer than this chapter, and all of it was planned as one chapter, hence why I decided to break it down. Plus it allows me to provide more updates :pinkiehappy:

1179394 hmmm now in hine sight its probably not really a "filler" chapter because it has more of an importance than to pad out the word count a bit. so I sorry I called it that and not being a good writer Idk what they would call this kind of chapter not to say its bad or snything far from it but ya idk:unsuresweetie:

1179522 Haha, is all good. I know what you meant. This chapter really was more of a transition from the last chapter to the next, instead of a standalone instance. It is the first chapter I think I have put down that didn't grant further info of the story or fall back to previous plot lines to develop. In that way, filler is a decent enough explanation, and I take no offense at it :twilightsmile:

Swift is 120% skrewed! :pinkiecrazy:
Btw. Nice chapter!:derpytongue2:

1193027 It's always time :pinkiehappy: Though we shall see how it develops lol.

This chapter worried me with the explanation of chaos magic. So much so I had it proofread before I posted to make sure it didn't hurt to read. The end needed a fun hook, and children with their awkward questions are always good for that. Plus I was excited to write the part with Swift and Scootaloo flying through the air. :scootangel::rainbowlaugh:

I wonder how they will find out that Swift is indeed a nexus thingie.
Will they just say "Buck it" And continue to be his friend's? or will they banish him to the moon? or worse, the sun!
Btw. When is the shipping starting!? :raritycry:

1193170 from what i got out of the chaos magic description chaos magic is like a wild beast that you cant control as much as sugest but then again it is like 1o six here:pinkiecrazy:

"Fantastic. I'm somewhat new to the area and am in need of money and or food. Dash said this was the place and that you could probably use an extra hand." He explained, releasing her hoof and glancing around the area at all the trees. AJ could have hugged Dash had she been here. An extra set of hands would do wonders today, even if it was a pegasus and not a strong earth pony.

Now unless Lyra has been poking around here I do believe that ponies lack "hands" an extra set of hands would do wonders no doubt...only that Swift has no extra set of hands to give and Applejack had no hands to begin with.
Yeah im being an egghead here :twilightsmile:

Oh but I say I do enjoy this story so far!:raritystarry:

RAINBOW DASH GETS SHIPPED FOR THE MILLIONTH TIME? :rainbowderp:

Oh who cares if its done well!:raritystarry:

LET THE SHIPPING COMMENCE!

1330249 Ah, good catch on the Hands reference. That is now fixed. :twilightsmile:

I try to go through and catch things like that, but some still slip through the cracks lol.

Two things could be possible. 1: he was a human and thus has that spark of choas in his core.
or 2: he was born from the Choas energy that Discord released.
or maybe 3.... He's actually Loki in disguise!!:pinkiegasp:

I usually prefer fics with more action but this is alright. Worth the read. keep it up.

1332456 Thanks for sticking with it. Later on I plan on a bit more action but this is more a slice of life with a taste of action. :twilightsmile:

"Thank you for this Twilight. I own you a great deal."...

Shouldn't this read, "I owe you a great deal"? :applejackconfused:

Also:

If you need any help let me know." He offered,

That "he" there shouldn't be capitalized unless it's some kind of deliberate plot point... which I wouldn't put past you, but...

1335857 Haha, both are very good catches. Well done :twilightsmile: Fixed. :)

Glancing around while trying to find a way to cheer up the filly currently leaning against him, he noticed something hanging out of her saddlebag off to the side.

"Scoots, why do you have rope?" He asked, an idea slowly starting to form.

"Huh? Oh, we use it while crusading. It's pretty handy for pulling things, or tying things up when we are building. Not that it has ever worked to get our cutie marks." She explained, still depressed, but curious as to why Swift was currently pulling it out of her bag. Swift simply nodded as he checked it's length.

'Yeah, this should be long enough. I think it's time Scoots got to see the world as a real pegasus.' Swift thought, grinning.

"I have an idea, Scoots."

:pinkiehappy::twilightoops: Something tells me saddles and bridles are about to find a less decorative use in Ponyville... or maybe over it. :trollestia: Seriously though, way to go, you guys! (The accompanying link is to a song that started running through my head during the last two paragraphs. :rainbowlaugh: )

See, now, hetero shipping that happens in a believable manner, that I like and can get behind. :pinkiehappy: Nice job going against the regular flow around here, kudos! :scootangel:

1337684 Thank you very much:twilightsmile: I try to keep the emotional development at a reasonable level. Too often I see the characters thrown together without any buildup, especially with RD who would be the least likely to fall for someone on sight of all the mane six. Glad you are enjoying the story and thanks for the comments and feedback :twilightsmile: Keep it coming, and stay tuned.

Have you been too busy to write, or did you just lose interest in Of Loyalty and Chaos? I've been checking back every so often to see if you updated...:twilightoops::rainbowhuh::applejackunsure::unsuresweetie:

1413643 I have just been very busy lately. Work picked up and now I am out of state visiting family. While out here I am working on the next couple of chapters so expect an update in about a week. :twilightsmile:

1416930 He said 8 days ago. Jk. I can wait.

1464889 I'm actually working on the chapter right now :)

I drove my 69 mustang from Utah to Kentucky and on the drive back it broke down, so been dealing with that lol

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