• Member Since 14th May, 2016
  • offline last seen Last Wednesday

Sense of Humor


A funny author(hopefully)

T

Rarity is a fairly nice pony all things considered, but being a nice pony doesn't mean you can't interact with newcomers to ponyville--just not the cranky ones that want nothing to do with their neighbors. So after a particularly rude and snarky blind stallion makes it clear he's not looking for friendly welcoming, she decides to leave him be...

...but then her butt started glowing and the cutie map is pointing straight in his direction, so now she HAS to start being his friend. Naturally, it gets worse from there.

Sex jokes abound, but no actual sex...yet. Maybe, who knows?

(Based on the amazing concept of Applejack's Butt, a fricking amazing story. Well, mostly the slow burn aspect, I guess. Read it before you read this)

Chapters (8)
Join our Patreon to remove these adverts!
Comments ( 48 )

Keeping an eye on this one.

This seems interesting so far I will be tracking this to see where this goes.

See If don't want to be THAT but but could you post more?

9112537
It only gets more wordful from here!

9112779
You're welcome, by the way, does this stallion have a name?

9112810
To be revealed next chapter!

9112834
All right then thanks.

Oh, this seems like the start of a very enjoyable experience. :rainbowlaugh:

Chrome Texture is just the best I can't get enough of him, Rarity certainly has her work cut out for her, great work.

I really like the chrome texture guy but is he actually blind? I mean like visually impaired? I might have not got that whilst I was reading, sorry. If so that trick Rarity billed on him is just plain horrible! If I was princess Celestia I would go to that bitch, take her horn away and make HER blind! Let's see how she likes it
BTW: Love you story keep up the good work!

9114445
Huh. I thought I had stated it a little earlier. I'll have to do better about that.

And Thanks!

I always wondered what would the Cutie Map do if whoever was called for an assignment deliberately ignored the call.

Looks like I got on board just in time to have more to read. The character development here has been very good thus far. Overall the story is a very relaxing read compared to most, which is a refreshing change of pace.

Consider me alone for the ride, wherever this goes. Color me excited, not that Chrome would be able to see that. :raritywink:

9114720
Maybe it would glow for the rest of their lives?

9114901
Aw shucks, and here I am thinking my character development wasn't going good for this. Thanks for the comment! I'm excited to see where I go with this, no pun intended. :ajsmug:

9115387
Or stop glowing once the problem resolved itself...or the pony with the problem died. Perhaps then the map would not call on that person again.

9115597
Yeah, more likely to be that.


Now that I'm thinking about it, perhaps it calls on those they know won't refuse the call.

Twilight smirked at her, not that she could see it while she was walking away. "Hmm. That sounds like a friendship problem if there ever was one."

The alabaster unicorn froze, eyes widening in brief terror. She shuddered to herself. "Ugh, no. The last thing I want is cross paths with that jerk again!"

Ah, jinxing yourself is always fun.

This was very nice for a short chapter. Evertmything flows as one coherent scene.

This is utterly impossible! Inconceivable! Improbable! Implausible! Unsubstantial! Incomprehensible! Simply unimaginable in every sense of the word! " Rarity nearly fainted at her lack of progress and weary hooves. "I've ran through almost all of Ponyville to no end in sight! Where, oh where, am I to find the hapless pony or ponies that are in desperate need of my assistance?! Where I ask you?!"

She leaned towards a random mare, crazed eyes boring into theirs. "WHERE?!"

Ha, got a laugh out of me.

The stallion sighed. "...Chrome Texture."

Rarity turned towards him halfway, eyes blinking in consideration. It was certainly a guy's name.

That it is. And this chapter was certainly amazing. The interactions are intriguing.

Chrome continues to be awesome. I do have one question though I see that the Romance tag is there, and I was wondering why? I can't see Chrome and Rarity together at all.

Maybe you and Vedues can do a crossover at some point

9116423
Slow burns always starts out that way! It'll grow more as the chapters progress, hopefully to where you can picture it.

9116445
XD it's be nice to think of the stories in the same universe

I think Rarity's male regulars are going to be getting an unexpectedly hostile greeting upon their next visit to Carousel Boutique. At least until she finds out who said that um... particular compliment.

My bits are on it being Thunderlane. You know, since he's felt that part of her before. :trollestia:

9116809
Perhaps a few stink eyes here and there. :twilightangry2:

Hmmm, perhaps. :derpytongue2:

Really enjoying things so far, though I caught a missed word:

"You, sir, you should be quite ashamed of yourself! Making a stallion pay ten bits for a measly hat, when it's only bits."

I'm assuming it should be "it's only three bits."

Very nice progression, letting us see cracks slowly widening in Chrome's guard, but keeping up his aloof and sarcastic nature. I'm really enjoying this!

9117016
You could say he's a chip off the old block right about now...

I'll leave now.

9117167
Stop, you're making me crack up. Puns rock!

9117180
I'm a stone faced author, I won't laugh at your puns.

9117290
Fine, I'll be gneiss and stop taking you for granite. I guess my sedimentary lifestyle has made me coal-d.

(Someone help me, I can't stop!)

Rarity rolled her eyes. "No, Pinkie, that's not...well...actually, yes! He is playing hard to get! He's new in town and so far he's either been melancholic slash despondent or snide slash sarcastic! Out of all the attempts at friendship that I've thrown at him, only one did something! And even then it was a minuscule improvement."

5 mins later it suddenly hit pinky what rarity said to pinky wait he NEW IN TOWN :pinkiegasp: i not thrown him a party :pinkiecrazy:

It may be party time in the future.

Things are getting interesting for sure.

When your rear-end becomes a nightlight you didn't want with no off switch. :rainbowlaugh:

Here's to hoping the party goes well.

Can't wait to see Chrome meet Twilight and her reaction to him.

Like "compadre", meaning a friend. Take off the "com" and replace it with "Pegasus" and you have Pegasus-padre.

9239540
Could not have worded it better.

Login or register to comment
Join our Patreon to remove these adverts!