The Element of Generosity has a unique problem on her hooves.
Rarity is a fairly nice pony all things considered, but being a nice pony doesn't mean you can't interact with newcomers to ponyville--just not the cranky ones that want nothing to do with their neighbors. So after a particularly rude and snarky blind stallion makes it clear he's not looking for friendly welcoming, she decides to leave him be...
...but then her butt started glowing and the cutie map is pointing straight in his direction, so now she HAS to start being his friend. Naturally, it gets worse from there.
Sex jokes abound, but no actual sex.
(Based on the amazing concept of Applejack's Butt, a fricking amazing story. Well, mostly the slow burn aspect, I guess. Read it before you read this)
"Sweetie Belle, Darling, Are you sure we can't just wait until later?"
"What?! No! The line might be longer by then!"
Rarity groaned, rolling her eyes and dramatically falling on her face. "But it's just face painting! It's not even being done by a celebrity, for Celestia's sake! Surely you don't think the line would grow just because we're leaving it for an itty bitty while?!"
Sweetie Belle gave her a particularly impassive expression, one Rarity would have been proud of under different circumstances. "Really; begging like this? Honestly, Rarity. You should act more like your age!"
The overly dramatic unicorn mare narrowed her eyes up at the sassy filly. "Hmmph. Says the one who was dying to get her face painted like a tiger. I thought you said you grew up from this sort of thing! From filly stuff!"
"Details, Details. Just because I've given up some of my childhood antics doesn't mean I can't keep others." She responded with a wave of her hoof. "In any case, if you'll look behind you, you'll see why we can't leave."
A train of ponies long enough to cut through half of ponyville was behind her, all with an expression eerily similar to her own. Some, like the one directly behind her, were chatting amongst themselves. Clearly this line was far too long to attempt leave, and may hope of it going down with time vanished. Rarity slumped snout first into the ground and was content to stay that way until the line moved again. Or until somepony started poking her hind leg with a stick.
"Excuse me, could you not do that?" The unicorn grumbled aloud, only to sigh when the poking came again. "Ahem! I asked you not to do that!"
"And I poked you again." It was a male voice, dripping with sarcasm. "I guess that means something, huh?"
"Yes. It means you're rude." Rarity dragged her head up from the ground to glare at him. He seemed average, around her age with a brick red mane and a burnt orange coat. Thick, circular red glasses sat on his snout and obscured his eyes. "If you'll take a good look around sir, you'll notice that I am in a very long line! I don't have the patience or temperament to deal with the likes of you today."
"If you'll take a good look at this cane," He used his horn's aura to hold up a red and white cane of sorts. "And my glasses, you'll see why I haven't noticed."
Rarity blinked at the cane as if this stallion were absolutely stupid...before it suddenly dawned on her. She sheepishly laughed and rubbed her foreleg. "Oh. You're...oh. My apologies."
"None accepted. Now, I was using this to help me navigate and not run into any pony. I'm trying to pass through," He pointed past her, probably guessing where her head was. "If I had known the line was here then I would have gone around to avoid this unhappy talk. As it is, I'd like to go through now."
Rarity's ears folded back against her head, and she probably shrank a few inches. "Um, Yes of course." She muttered apologetically and moved aside to let him pass. When he still stood there, she coughed. "Um, I moved."
The stallion moved as well, forward that is. Rarity watched him go, her mind pondering over this stallion. She'd never seen any pony like him before, or at least not here in ponyville. She normally kept her curiosity to herself but said curiosity mixed with apologetic feelings equaled an urge to learn more about him.
The Fashionista started away from the line. "Sweetie Belle, I'll be right back."
After hearing some noncommittal noise, the mare trotted after the stallion, who was using his cane to make sure he wouldn't be running into anything. She hadn't noticed before, but he had a heavy saddlebag hanging from his shoulder. She carefully spoke, not wanting to startle him. "Um, excuse me?"
He flinched, but nothing else happened. He turned in her direction with a raised eyebrow and a groan. "You again? I was too far away to have poked you again, Lady."
The mare winced. "I really am sorry for giving you trouble. I had no idea at the time and..." She shrugged but realized he couldn't see it. "Um, are you...new to Ponyville?"
"Yes," He grimaced. "And I'm not looking for any tour guides, so don't start."
"Well, I wasn't really--"
"Good."
Rarity narrowed her eyes at him. Even if she had been a little unkind, she didn't deserve this kind of talk. She opened her mouth to say this when he suddenly stopped. "Is this Northwood street?"
"What?" She asked, taken aback by the random question.
The stallion groaned dramatically and spoke extra slow, as if she were a particularly dumb mare. "Is. This. North.Wood.Street?"
Offended, she snorted at him. "No, it's straight from your right." She followed him as he started in that direction, still glaring. "You know, with that kind of attitude, you won't make very many friends here. I suggest being a little nicer to ponies."
"I suggest you go easy on the perfume next time. I'm getting a headache just smelling it."
Rarity blinked in disbelief--at first because of how fast he whipped at her with that comment. Then she shook in place, bristled and turned her snout upwards. "Ugh! I have had it with you! I hope you don't run into any pony else from here, for THEIR sake! Not yours!"
The stallion snorted, probably the closest thing to a laugh from him. "Hope you get a cramp standing in line. Chao!"
"Rrrrr!" She growled in an unladylike fashion and stomped back into line with Sweetie Belle, who turned and winced at her appearance. When she opened her mouth to speak, the mare snorted. "Don't even ask! I don't want to talk about that awful stallion!"
Sweetie Belle wrinkled her snout. "Uh...I was gonna ask why your cutie mark is glowing."
Rarity smiled as the doors to the castle opened, and Twilight was eagerly grinning. "Rarity! Just the pony I was expecting to see!"
"Even though I saw you just yesterday, It's so good to see you darling! " The Fashionista waltzed inside, hugging Twilight. "How have you been? How's Spikey-Wikey?"
The Alicorn shrugged. "Same old, Same old." She pouted tiredly. "He ate too much ice cream again and got a bellyache."
"Oh, goodness, poor little thing." Rarity whined as she was led to the main room, where the Cutie Map would lay in wait for her. "Do tell him that I hope he gets better soon."
"Will do! Now," Her friend pushed open the doors, eyes trained on the map instantly. "About the Cutie Map. It's a bit...weird this time."
"Weird?" Rarity tilted her head and trotted up to the table, looking for her signature diamonds. "Weird how?"
"Well, for one," Twilight pointed at a specific area of the map. Rarity gasped when she realized that her cutie mark was floating above Ponyville, of all places. Whatever the friendship problem was, it seemed that it was in their little town. "It seems like your friendship problem has come to you."
"I see," The unicorn curiously inspected the space around her mark. She sat up in curious worry. "Um, who's my partner this time?"
Twilight shook her head. "That's the other weird thing! You have no partner for this problem, Rarity. I contacted the others, and no pony else's cutie marks are glowing."
The mare tapped her chin, smiling softly. "So perhaps this problem is so easy, that it only needs me to solve it!"
"Meh, Maybe."
"Well, I'm going to handle this all tommorow. I had to wait hours in line just so my little sister could look like a tiger," Rarity walked away with a tired sigh. "And I had to deal with a rude stallion."
"Rude stallion?" Twilight asked.
"Yes. He's new to Ponyville and...perhaps blind." Rarity explained unhappily. "When I tried to be just the slightest bit nice to him, he rebuffed me and insulted my perfume."
Twilight smirked at her, not that she could see it while she was walking away. "Hmm. That sounds like a friendship problem if there ever was one."
The alabaster unicorn froze, eyes widening in brief terror. She shuddered to herself. "Ugh, no. The last thing I want is cross paths with that jerk again!"
Rarity had elected to spend the next day searching the town for any friendship problems. She started nearest to Sugarcube corner, then worked her way up the streets nearest to that area, before finally fanning out further from there. She stopped by most shops and stores all over Ponyville, casually spying on the occasional mare or stallion to search for her assigned problem. It was hours before she ended up stopping in the middle of town square, panting for breath.
"This is utterly impossible! Inconceivable! Improbable! Implausible! Unsubstantial! Incomprehensible! Simply unimaginable in every sense of the word! " Rarity nearly fainted at her lack of progress and weary hooves. "I've ran through almost all of Ponyville to no end in sight! Where, oh where, am I to find the hapless pony or ponies that are in desperate need of my assistance?! Where I ask you?!"
She leaned towards a random mare, crazed eyes boring into theirs. "WHERE?!"
After watching her scramble away in a fit of screaming, Rarity pouted and kicked a pebble in despair. "How am I supposed to solve a friendship problem if I can't even FIND the accursed--huh?"
She looked back to find a most peculiar sight; her cutie mark was glowing even brighter than it had before--but it didn't pulsate in the manner that it did when a friendship problem was solved. It was just brighter than before, making her eyelids wince a little. Did that mean her subject was close by? Rarity inched towards a nearby shop and grinned as she saw her mark glow with fierce intensity. Her travels inside the store led her down aisles upon aisles of unique hats, stationed next to each other in proud rows. Well, where was this mystery pony? There wasn't a sign of anypony other than her in--
Rarity squealed loudly as she felt a hoof poke awkwardly into her flank, cheeks turning as red as Big Mac. Just before she could launch her hind hooves into the face of the unlucky creep who had the gall to touch her gloriously sized hindquarters, an all too familiar voice stopped her.
"Squeak? " The voice asked, as if deeply perturbed. "Odd. Pillows don't go squeak. And what are pillows doing in a hat store?"
It took every ounce of her not to buck the blind stallion anyway, and instead settle her hind legs back on the ground. With an irritated huff at her cheerful cutie mark, Rarity turned and faced him. "That was my butt, you jerk."
At first, the stallion seemed surprised that a voice responded to him from the sudden pile of pillows in his way. Then that same snarky expression appeared on his face. "I thought I smelled bad perfume. I take it you're here to buy a hat?"
"I have no use for a hat at this time," Rarity plainly stated. "My hair could use the sunlight--helps it to stay velvety and rich,"
"Right," He agreed sarcastically and suspiciously all at once. "You're bald, aren't you?"
"...I am NOT bald."
"Says the mare who thinks her perfume wouldn't slaughter a bee colony within twenty yards of us."
The mare sneered, fur standing on end from the rising anger. "It is not that bad, you...ugh," She rolled her eyes and decided that explaining would get her new results. "Listen, you pompous scoundrel, I would not be here if it weren't for my cutie mark bringing me to you."
The stallion reached up towards his left, his hoof running over several hats in deep thought. "That makes sense, now that I'm thinking about it."
She blinked at him, surprised and curious all at the same time. "It...It does?"
"Yes." He nodded. "Your cutie mark is in the shape of an annoying pony following another, right?"
He wouldn't see it coming, Rarity. I could just give him a nice hard kick and leave just like that. Nopony can see us here--it'll be like it never happened.
Somehow, she managed to keep her eager hind legs from doing anything. "I'm a member of the Elements of Harmony, if you've heard of us. I'm the Element of Generosity."
"Are you going to give me a generous distance?"
"We have a large magical table of sorts, adequately named the Cutie Map on account of it sending us wherever or marks appear on it. And my cutie mark is currently glowing the brightest it's ever glowed, and I'm right in front of you so..." She sighed as she watched him pick up a hat and carefully run a hoof across the dark blue fabric. "Do you even care?"
The stallion sniffed the hat once and angled his head towards her. "What color is this hat?"
"Pink." It was a lie, but it would at least make her feel slightly better. Besides, she wasn't the Element of Honesty.
"Liar. It's anything but pink." He spoke before she could retort about his claim. " I've had years to learn the physical difference in color for paintings and fabrics. More often than not, a darker color will feel the slightest bit rough--like the grains are collected on top of each other to blot out light hues. A color like pink would be practically seamless in texture. "
Rarity sheepishly shrank. "I suppose that's reasonable."
He carried his intended hat in his magical grip and used his cane to feel his way around her. "If this Cutie Map led you all the way to me just so you can screw up my life choices, then I'm starting to regret moving here."
The unicorn sighed as he walked past her, silently following him all the way to the front counter. She idly pondered her glowing cutie mark, and then the problem she had to solve. Perhaps it was to get him to warm up to Ponyville and others--to change from a life of sarcasm to being open to friendly talks? Whatever the reason, his heart or his sight, Rarity would solve this problem--or at least try tonight.
The cashier's voice snapped her out of her thoughtful trance. "Alright, buddy! That'll be ten bits!"
The stallion flinched, his grip loosening on the hat. "Ten bits? I must have been in the wrong spot--was there a spot in the store with sale values?"
"Nope. Ten is our lowest price, been that way for as far back as we can count."
Rarity examined the hat's tag from behind the stallion and gasped in insulted surprise. Her eyes narrowed at the cashier behind the corner, matching her bristling fur nicely. "You, sir, you should be quite ashamed of yourself! Making a stallion pay ten bits for a measly hat, when it's only 3 bits."
The stallion looked back at her with an annoyed expression, but for once he didn't say anything annoying or biting. The cashier nervously poked his hooves together. "Uh,that tag...It's,uh...Outdated! Yeah!"
"Outdated?" The stallion raised an eyebrow in his direction. "I thought you said the price was ten bits for as far back as you can count. How would you have a 3 bit price tag if it's always been 10 bits?"
The cashier glared at Rarity with an irritated huff. "Well maybe it actually says ten bits! You gonna believe this mare over me--a guy who actually works here?"
"I have absolutely no reason to lie about the price of the hat! You, on the other hoof," Rarity immediately shot back at him and defensively stepped in front of the stallion. "Would lie to a blind pony just to earn yourself a few extra bits!"
"Now that's just not true, ya little--! Eh?" He watched as the blind stallion briskly walked between them and managed his way out of the entrance. The cashier instantly rolled his eyes and gave her an accusing look. "Ya just had to talk, didn't ya?"
"Hmmph!"
With that snort of contempt, Rarity trotted her way out of the hat store and looked around for the stallion. She spotted him traveling left from the store, carefully maneuvering around ponies with his cane. She sped up alongside him with an apologetic expression. "I simply must apologize for that completely dishonest cashier! I assure you that there are only a hooful of ponies like that around here."
The stallion snorted to himself, but it dissolved into an irritated sigh. "Uh huh. Sure. And I'll probably be running into every last one of them, because it'd be easy to get money out of a defenseless blind stallion." He might have mumbled something like: "This place is no better than the others." but he was speaking too low to be sure.
Rarity wasn't sure if she quite liked him or not, but she definitely felt sympathetic. As the Element of Generosity, it was her duty to be...well, generous in any way. The most generous thing she could offer now would be a little kindness.
"Why don't I make you a hat?" She blurted out, then blushed. "That is to say--It would be my pleasure to make you one, free of charge! Call it a welcoming gift."
He stopped walking and focused his unseeing gaze in her general direction. "Make me a hat? What are you, a fashion designer?"
She smiled. "As a matter of fact, I am! I am also a shopkeeper and Seamstress! Perhaps you've heard of Rarity for you, down in Manehatten?"
"Nope."
"Well, it exists. I also have a Carousel Boutique here in town, so we can do head measurements there and I can have a hat ready for you tomorrow."
The stallion formed a straight line with his lips, saying nothing and doing nothing that reassured her. Just when she was sure he was going to disagree, he shrugged. "Why not? You'll probably follow me around anyway, what with this glowing cutie mark and all."
Pleased with his reluctant cooperation, Rarity began to walk again and the stallion followed her presence. They were close by, so getting the measurements done would be all too easy. The mare glanced at him from a sidelong angle, still smiling. "So...are you still not going to tell me?"
"I've been telling you your perfume is bad since we met."
She rolled her eyes with a loud scoff. "No! Your name! Can I get your name?"
The stallion sighed. "...Chrome Texture."
Rarity turned towards him halfway, eyes blinking in consideration. It was certainly a guy's name.
Rarity carried the hat in her magical grip, eyeing it from every angle as she eagerly trotted forward. She admired every little detail about it--from the seams to the fabric to the color. It was all one flawless mixture of things that should be in every hat, working off of each other. She may have overdone things from the original design, but it didn't matter to her and she hoped it didn't matter to Chrome.
Chrome. Chrome Texture.
Rarity figured describing him to any pony would be a perilous task. Well, he was certainly a pony who's entire life was based on sarcasm and being horrendously mysterious when he wasn't being snide. When she was taking his head measurements, she'd curiously asked about why he moved to Ponyville. When he merely stated that the train he was on was the reason, she couldn't say that she was surprised. They didn't really talk much after and soon he was on his merry way.
Well, hopefully, the quest to solve this living friendship problem would take a step in the right direction with this custom made hat. Rarity wasn't sure what problems lay within the mind of this unhappy stallion, but if her cutie mark said she needed to solve it then she would do everything in her power to do just that. Just as soon as she removed the odd paper from her face.
The fashionista peeled it away with her magic, briefly checking to see if her mascara had rubbed off on it. A familiar pony carefully slowed to a halt in front of her, reaching out with a timid hoof. "Oh, I'm terribly sorry about that. I have to keep a good grip on these papers."
"Oh, it's fine, Mr.Hooves. I...Hmm?" She briefly paused and looked over the paper, eyes reading a couple of words while overshadowed by a picture of a sculpture. She blinked at the surprising detail and read the words more. "Hmmm...Marble Sculptures. Hourly schedule inside."
Doctor Hooves laughed to himself as she handed back the flyer. "These have been passed out all day so far. A blind stallion in town has the majority, so I assume he's advertising for a new friend in town.
Rarity nodded thoughtfully. Perhaps she would pay this sculptor a visit for a brief modeling session. " Um...I may know that stallion. " The unicorn looked around. "Is he still around?"
"Yep. The middle of the square." He pointed out verbally, in the process of moving past her. "I imagine he's got a few minutes to go before he runs out of flyers."
Nodding with a hum, the white unicorn made her way to the middle of town, noting that there were a lot more ponies gathered here than usual even though they weren't all in the same area. Some were here, some were there and some were both. Amongst the chatty hordes, she spotted her particular stallion carefully wandering out from among them with a flyer or two in his magical possession.
"Fancy seeing you here." She called out softly as he began to pass her by from a few hooves away. "Are the fish biting?"
He stopped in his tracks for a moment, before he deciphered who the voice belonged to and relaxed. "Fish?"
"Yes. Are they biting?"
"I'm not quite sure I follow."
Rarity pursed her lips. "Fish biting at a lure. I was using that to compare to passing out flyers." When he still looked confused, she tilted her head. "Surely you've gone fishing at least once in your life?"
Chrome adjusted his dark glasses. "Well, the lack of sight tends to put a damper on having any sight-based hobbies."
"You'd be surprised what a pony can do, even with...limitations." To speedily change the subject, she went back to the flyers. "Might I have one of those advertisements? I hear they're for sculptures?"
Chrome seemed to stand a little taller, quickly handing her a flyer. "Yes. I'm staying with a friend of mine who does sculptures to pay the bills wherever we live. " He paused and rubbed his chin. "That is to say, he stays with me in my house here in ponville."
"Hmm." Despite getting a good look earlier, she scanned over the paper again. "I should love to meet your friend! Perhaps he is part of this whole friendship problem you're involved in."
Even with the thick glasses, she could see him rolling his eyes at that. "Eh, maybe someday. He likes to busy himself with customers, so there's no time for personal meetings." He shrugged. "I wasn't expecting so many ponies to want to take one of these. I take it Ponyville has never had a sculptor before?"
"Well, no. Not at all," Rarity gave herself a moment to think before explaining a bit before."The only art we usually have are paintings and, if you include it, fashion from yours truly. Speaking of which, here is your hat."
"O-Oh. You actually...made it for me?"
"Of course I did. You didn't think I was playing some kind of prank on you, did you?"
Chrome didn't answer her, which made her frown. She opened her mouth to ask about about this as he put on the hat, then beat her to words. "Th-Thank you, Rarity. This hat is... adequate."
"I..." She started to ask, but stopped herself for some reason. "Um, you are very welcome."
Chrome either didn't notice her hesitation or didn't want to acknowledge it. "Well, I learned a little bit more about you from others in Ponyville. They all say nice things about you."
As he started off in a specific direction, she idly followed beside him. She wasn't sure if he knew where he was going, but they weren't exactly on a straight path towards a cliff or anything. "Oh, really?" She said, perhaps a little more coy than she intended to sound. "Things like what?"
He shrugged. "Just that you make really good clothes and dresses. Best in Ponyville, and you don't overprice your merchandise." He paused. "When I asked, a few people described you as a young unicorn mare with a white coat, a purple mane and blue eyes. They also said your body is perfect and you have nice hips. Were they close?"
Rarity bit her bottom lip in thought. "Well, I like to think of myself as a moderate adult and my coat is really more Alabaster than just white. My mane is actually midnight violet, my eyes are definitely cerulean and my hips..."
The mare blinked as something dawned on her. "They said I have nice hips?"
"Well, basically. They really said things ranging from," With a smug smirk, he imitated another voice. "She's got hips that swing like a bell or Her's flank a perfect hooful. I might have even heard something along the lines of : I'd love for her to sit on my face sometime."
Rarity was no longer an alabaster/white unicorn, needless to say. "You...! You're joking! No pony said that!"
"You'd be surprised what stallions think about some pony when they're backs are turned. Or in your case, backside."
"That's not funny." And it wasn't--there was nothing funny about such unflattering remarks. Her butt wasn't even as awe-inspiring as they claimed! "And if you know what's good for your jaw--"
"Well its not like I agree with them. Can't really confirm the hype for myself, you know. Not without physical confirmation." He shook his head a little. "Even if I could see for myself, judging beauty based on exterior looks is pretty shallow."
Rarity blinked at him from a side long angle. "Shallow is a...well, I suppose it's a fitting word choice." She looked around to see that they were at the end of a street, with a sparse number of ponies around. After searching for the street number, the mare coughed softly. "Um, we're on 23 Neighbolt street."
"Ah yes. My house should be up over that hill in front of us." He nodded as he began to ascend the baby mountain. "Your company was mildly appreciated, Miss Bell Hips."
She did her best to ignore the remark, watching him go with reluctance. She highly doubted he'd have a reason to be outside tommorow--not after spending a few days moving in and one day of advertising. The mare found herself idly wondering if there was any way she set up a meeting for tomorrow. After all, her cutie mark wasn't going to solve itself.
"Um, Chrome, darling?"
"Chrome Texture." He corrected as he stopped.
"Yes, erm..." She rubbed her foreleg. "...Perhaps if you're feeling hungry tomorrow morning, we could...I don't know...have breakfast at a cafe I know?"
The stallion held very still for a long time, back turned her in silence. The tense moment of noiseless thought ended with a simple, emotionless word: "No."
Rarity flinched as he promptly trotted up the hill and out of sight, and with him perhaps the first chance at solving this friendship problem.
"Ugh. I just can't seem to do anything right with this." The mare sighed and walked off.
Rarity dragged herself into Sugarcube corner quite literally, given how she carried herself only by the aura of her magic. The journey officially ended just as she slumped onto a stool in front of the counter. Rarity, needless to say, was enjoying the new renovations to the bakery.
"Uuuugh." She groaned into the cushion of the stool, hear ears detecting a familiar bounce approaching.
"Awwww!" Pinkie Pie leaned over the counter to stare at Rarity. "Why the long face, Ace?"
The unicorn reluctantly lifted her head and offered a dry look. " I cannot possibly talk without a sugar swirl sundae."
"I thought you said you didn't like them because of the calories." When she got the look, Pinkie shrugged and summoned a sundae from the depths of her mane. "Well, Ok. If you say so."
Rarity practically slurped up the whole thing, somehow barreling past the brain freeze that tried to attack her. As she idly drank the caramel goodness, her eyes wandered here and there to alleviate her frustrations. She blinked suspiciously as she noticed a trio of stallions suddenly looking away when she laid eyes on them, and then a lone stallion doing the same when her sights ventured towards him. Well, this certainly wasn't doing anything to get rid of her frustrations.
"Pinkie Pie, How do you do it?" She asked abruptly.
"Well, first I start with a base of vanilla bean and then I added a chocolate chunk layer and then I sprinkle skittles in the mix! After that, I drizzle the whole thing with a great big dollop of caramel syrup and then I--"
"No, I mean...being a good friend. How do you do it?"
Pinkie paused entirely, her smile falling in deep thought. "...Uh, I guess...I don't know, really. I just sort of do my best to make my friends happy. Give them what they want when they need it, like how I gave you the Sugar Swirl Sundae because you needed it. " She stretched her arms out. "Or giving you a hug because you look like you need it."
"I don't need a hug, darling. I just needed the sundae. I'll save that hug for a rainy day or something," The unicorn said as she settled her chin in her hoof. "And thanks for the explanation. Hopefully it'll be of use to me while I'm dealing with this stallion."
"Oooh, a stallion~," The Party Pony purred preposterously. "What--Is he playing hard to get?"
Rarity rolled her eyes. "No, Pinkie, that's not...well...actually, yes! He is playing hard to get! He's new in town and so far he's either been melancholic slash despondent or snide slash sarcastic! Out of all the attempts at friendship that I've thrown at him, only one did something! And even then it was a minuscule improvement."
"Oh, that's why your butt is glowing."
"That about sums it up, yes." Rarity pouted pathetically. "What am I going to do? I tried to ask him to a nice, friendly breakfast and he said no! He's not making this friendship problem solving very easy!"
"It's never easy for any of us when solving friendship problems!" Pinkie shrugged. "You gotta think beyond friendly meetings and casual talks! Visit him at home! Send him a nice gift! Always bring a positive outlook to his day." The mare reached forward and grabbed the unicorn by her cheeks, smashing their noses together. "You're the Elemnent of Generosity! Give him a generous friendship!"
Rarity blinked, lips pursed from her squished cheeks. "I shuppose tha makesh shense."
Pinkie let go and offered a proud smirk. "I always make sense."
Rarity rolled her eyes, but smiled nonetheless. Ignoring the wandering eyes she could see at the corners of her vision, the unicorn picked up her sundae and started to leave. "Thank you for everything, Darling! I must go to get my brainstorming started! I hope to see you soon?"
Early the next morning, the alabaster unicorn awoke with thoughts about what Pinkie said and the difficult stallion on her hooves. If she was going to use her elemental talents for the problem, she'd have to generously bring her A-game to the table. The mare decided that ,to start things off, she should try to re-ease in the idea of a cafe breakfast. She knew he'd seemed sensitive about the idea when she brought it up, and the last thing she wanted was to be rebuffed entirely for suggesting it again. Still, perhaps a little more prodding might sway him to join her side?
"If this goes wrong, it could be a while before he wants to participate in any friendly activities with me whatsoever. I could ruin the chance for another pony in the future..." She told herself as she applied a generous amount of eyeliner to her face. Her mental aura scooped up the lipstick next. "Then again, not asking could ruin my chances. We could be stuck at this level--just being acquaintances. Then I might be stuck with this cutie mark issue for...as long as it takes. Ugh."
The unicorn frowned into the mirror when her lipstick was applied in even amounts all over. She couldn't push Chrome to choose an answer--certainly not. Friendship was based on mutual comfort with each other and she was already sacrificing comfort by TRYING to be his friend. Not to say he was a horrible and difficult pony to be around, it was just that his personality was not ideal for her own. It was like Rainbow Dash, who was almost the exact opposite of Rarity.
She breathed in and swallowed nervously; okay, so she just needed to invite him to breakfast as gently as she did yesterday. Well, maybe with a few different words.
Yes, this could work. This would work. It had to.
Rarity would come to find herself waiting on 23 Neighbolt street for that stupidly sarcastic stallion at nine o'clock in the morning. Patiently, she tapped her hoof on the side of the dirt road and occasionally glanced at the tall hill in hopes of seeing Chrome waltzing down the side. But every time she looked, she would pout in disappointment at the swaying grass. As the sun was raised a little higher in the sky, she began to wonder if he was ever going to leave his house today. It made sense for him to stay, given all the moving around he'd been doing in the past. He must finally be exhausted.
She was happy to be proven wrong when she finally caught sight of figure carefully strolling down the hill. He seemed unhappy, yet calm in his measured lace downwards.She practically marched up to meet him halfway, hoping that things went as she hoped. "Ah, Chrome! There you--"
"Augh!"
He flinched backwards and somehow managed to lose his hoofing, tumbling forward in an uncontrolled roll down the hill. Gasping in horror, Rarity quickly reached out with a hoof to stop him only to be dragged along with him, briefly grunting or flinching from hitting tiny rocks. The cane he used was slammed into the ground several times, kept close only by the tether of his magic. They both ended up tumbling down to the very base of the miniature mountain, where Rarity found herself landing on top of him in an embarrassingly undignified way.
"Oh dear! Oh my goodness!" For some reason, she didn't move to get off of him and only gave him a worried frown, looking him over for injuries. How odd, that their bodies seemed to fit perfectly together like puzzle pieces. "Are you alright?! I'm terribly sorry about startling you like--"
"Um, All will be forgiven if you could get off me. He suddenly interrupted, calmly at that. "This is kinda weird, and I can't even see it."
Rarity exploded off of his body and helped him back to his hooves, before levitating his cane into his grip. It was bent slightly at the middle, be otherwise looked in perfect condition. She bit her bottom lip as she scanned herself; oh, there was tiny little bit of dirt on her shoulder! Ew! "I'm very sorry about that, Chrome! Normally, I am not that much of a klutz."
"I find that hard to believe." He mildly snapped, dusting himself off with a hoof. "What are you even doing out this way? You aren't stalking me, are you?"
Rarity scoffed at him, visibly offended by him. "Ugh, like I would stoop so low to show my affections for a pony."
"I mean, technically, stalkers don't really show affection. Well, not in public anyhow. Even then, the affection isn't generally preferred you know."
"Ah, yes. Of course. Well, I came to...apologize for yesterday." Rarty shifted her weight uncomfortably from one hoof to another. "You seemed a little tense when I asked you to breakfast, so I just wanted to say sorry. I won't ask why you seemed disturbed, but I will apologize for it. I suppose I'm...I'm just trying to get started on solving this friendship problem. I was just trying to be friendly with that offer, so that we could start on getting my butt to stop glowing."
"...how annoying is that?"
"What?"
"Your butt glowing? How annoying is it?"
"It's hard to sleep with this thing on. And I think you were right about what stallions think," Rarity stole a look over her shoulder as if she expected someone to be hiding. "I haven't stopped noticing all the stares I get."
Chrome sighed through his nostrils, shrugging. "Bet that riles up your colt friend a lot."
"Hmm? Oh!" Rarity laughed quietly. "Sorry to disappoint you, but I'm still single."
"Hmm, well...about that apology," Chrome tried to make his shrug look casual and not sheepish. "I...thought more about it. Even if I don't want to do any eating at a random cafe...maybe I still owe you. You know, for the hat."
"Owe me?! Oh, perish the thought!" She sounded almost offended by him. "You may do whatever it is you feel like doing."
"Well, now I feel like eating breakfast, so..." He reluctantly shrugged at her. "...Do you know any places?"
"I'm disturbed at how fast you thought of coming to this place, Rarity."
Rarity gave him a lopsided smirk as they approached the building, her eyebrow raising in a way that Applejack would be proud of. "I really like this place. They specialize in very good breakfast assortments from the hungry traveler."
Chrome grunted at her. "Oh come on! This place is called Eggs and I! They only specialize in EGGS. That's a weird choice for a main food item, don't you think?"
"You were the one who voiced his desire to eat something, you know. I believe you might actually like this place once you try it out." When Chrome merely grumbled something back, she took that as a good sign--or at least better than him deciding to go home again. The mare led them inside, where the smell of delicious breakfast surrounded them both, and stopped in front of a pony behind a small podium. "Hello! I would like a table for two, please."
"Yes, Ma'am." The pony scribbled something onto a slip of paper and then picked up two menus with her horn's aura, before pausing. She glanced at Rarity, then at Chrome with a questioning look. "I...um..."
The Fashionista frowned deeply. "...Are there no menus in braille?"
"My apologies. We don't normally get...you know..."
Rarity may have been staring at the employed, but she didn't miss the uncomfortable look forming on Chrome's face. She shook her head. "You can just give us one. I'll...er, read to him."
"Read it to him?" He asked incredulously.
Rarity glowered at him. "It's better than nothing, Chrome."
"Its humiliating."
"It is not humiliating to receive help from a friend."
"Whatever." He said, 'looking' away from her.
The employee gave them a nod and began to lead the two past a few tables with sparse amounts of ponies, mare and stallion alike. Rarity pointedly ignored the occasional glances in her direction and focused on the booth table offered to them. After finding out which side Chrome preferred to sit, she seated herself in the opposite booth and gladly took hold of the menu. Another employee, this one a teenage mare, stood in the place of the other after she left. "Alright! My name is Catchy Tune, and I will be your server for this morning! First, is there anything I could start you two off to drink?"
"I'll have Apple juice. " Rarity said.
"Water." Chrome grumbled, slouching in a way not dissimilar to a grouchy cat that she knew.
"Great. I'll be right back with your drinks, so you can decide your entrees."
Rarity nodded, her eyes already looking over the familiar menu. She stole at glance at the stallions unhappy face, smirking softly. "Mmmm Mmm! There's a lot of a delicious goodies on this menu~! I don't know what to choose."
"Will you stop treating me like a little kid?" He impressively sounded more annoyed than insulted. "Just read the menu items off to me so we can get this over with."
"Friends, believe it or not, actually enjoy and cherish the time they spend with each other. Helps them to bond and become closer."
"If I get any closer to you and your horrible perfume..."
Rarity rolled her eyes at him. "You know, I bet I could ask any other pony here and they'd say my perfume smells just heavenly."
"Some ponies might say a lot of things to get to close to you." He pointed his snout down at his hooves, which fiddled on the table. "Doesn't mean that any of its true."
The Alabaster unicorn pouted at him, but shrugged to herself. "Friends...are also honest, even if its brutal honesty. If you don't like my perfume, then I'm glad you're being honest about it.
" I never said I didn't like it."
"What?"
"I never said I didn't like your perfume--just that it smells bad. It's...grown on me, I suppose." He was content with that for a while, but then he lightly clopped his hooves together and continued. "It gives you a...distinct scent, if that doesn't sound too creepy. I always know when you're around in town because of that awful scent."
He shrugged reluctantly at her. "...I guess it's nice, knowing whenever somepony at least a little likeable is around...If you know the feeling."
Rarity thought over his words quietly, her eyes falling onto the plain table and staying there for some time. She figured that made enough sense to her; when you didn't have the luxury of sight, the next best thing was to judge who was near by based off of the other senses. She idly wondered what other things he could tell just by using his other senses--by converting his energy into his hooves, his ears, his nose and his taste. She even began to wonder what things she could learn about Fashion by not using her eyes, but she didn't want to zone out in the middle of a conversation.
"I see," Was all she wanted to say on the matter, but she suddenly remembered a specific part of his statements and grinned mischeviously. "My, My...Did you just call me likeable? Who are you and what have you done with Chrome Texture?"
"He's recovering in the hospital from your stench. He'll be back tomorrow," He shot back hastily, but there was a light change in color to his cheeks. That was a good sign. "Now, are you gonna read me the orders, or am I gonna go hungry?"
Rarity giggled to herself. "Okay, Okay. let's see..." She scanned through the menu and looked up once. " There's a Chipotle hay steak?"
He thoughtfully shook his head. "Nah. Sounds a little too spicy for me,"
The unicorn nodded at him. "Yes, right. Well, there is alsooo...Athena Scramble! Looks very nice."
The stallions ears twitched in interest. "Huh. Well, it's an extravagant title. What's in it, exactly?"
"A few delicious ingredients! It has asparagus, tomatoes, a mozzarella/ cheddar blend," Rarity began to list, glancing up at Chrome in coy interest. "Minced garlic, Tuscan bread crumbs, Pinkie Pie, crimini mushrooms, and the choice is optional for-- Puh-puh--P-PINKIE PIE?!"
"Hmm, I think I'll leave it out." He scrunched up his nose. "Pinkie Pie must be one of those 'new' kinds of spices, right?"
Rarity nervously giggled, glad that he couldn't see her looking directly over his head at the patio beyond the glass doors. "Ah Ha Ha Haaaaaaa. Yes. Yes. New spice, yes. Er, I'm going to go use the little mare's room. I have a...um,--A crumbly in my rumbly--I-I MEAN, A rumbly in my Pinkie--I MEAN I HAVE TO PEE!"
Rarity covered her mouth with a hoof, eyes darting around her. Now there were definitely more than just stallions laying their eyes on her, and more in the disgusted sense than anything salacious. Chrome blinked and cautiously nodded. "Uh...okaaay. Have fun."
"I plan to!" And then she was zipping past him to throw open the glass doors and tackle Pinkie Pie in mid-stride. After redirecting the fire of her party cannon, the unicorn gave her friend an unhappy stare. "What. Are.You. Doing?!"
"Oh, I'm lying on the ground with you on top of me."
Rarity fought the urge to face hoof. "...What were you doing before I tackled you, Darling?"
"Hmm?" Pinkie blinked in confusion. "I was just about to throw your colt friend the usual 'Welcome to Ponyville' party."
"Are you seriously jumping to that conclusion aready?" The unicorn sighed; perhaps she should have expected Pinkie to catch on to the information given yesterday. She also probably should have prepared for this a little sooner. "Listen, Darling," She began as she helped the younger mare to her hooves. "I'm going to need you to postpone this party for at least a few days."
Pinkie looked as though she'd been slapped repeatedly. "WHAT?! I can't just push back a welcoming party! He might get the feeling he's not wanted!"
"I'm treating him out to breakfast, Pinkie. He has to feel wanted. " Rarity said. "I know you don't like it, but its for your sake. The last thing I want is for this stallion's sarcastic jerk ways to resurface because of being in an uncomfortable situation. He'd probably hurt your feelings and then I'd have to buck him in the face."
"B-but..."
"I could go to jail for that, Pinkie."
"I...I know, but..."
"Do you want one of your best friends to sit in a jail cell with a glowing butt?"
"...No." Pinkie pouted like a despondent filly. After a moments time, she glared at Rarity. "I'll give you three days! And then I'm giving him a party whether he's a meanie pants or NOT."
Rarity winced, but she knew she couldn't beg for more time. "Oh, very well. But I must have a full three days, starting from tomorrow."
Pinkie nodded and turned to leave, trotting away at a somber pace. In seconds, she turned right back around with a frown. "Can I at least say hi to him?"
Rarity grimaced, shuddered and then forced a smile. "Um...sure."
Rarity's face was firmly planted into the table, but it did nothing to mask her feelings about Pinkie's inclusion. She had completely stolen the conversation after saying hi to Chrome, to the point where she invited herself to sit with them. She was certain that he wouldn't have batted an eye at Pinkie any other day, but with Rarity involved...he at least kept up a mild interest in her rambling. Perhaps he got a kick out of watching the alabaster unicorn suffer.
"Mmmhmm." He nodded slowly, seemingly admiring the distinct egg taste in his mouth. She wasn't sure if she even cares about the taste of hers, given how engrossed in the situation she was. "That's nice."
"It was the exact opposite of nice, though!" The pink mare responded with well acted disgust. "Grits are fine! But oatmeal is blegh to the max!"
Rarity scowled deeper against the hard table. "I know, for a fact, that you said those exact words five times now. In the exact same order."
Pinkie either didn't hear her or decided to ignore her altogether. "So then the guy sighs really loud,like he's annoyed about me complaining about the messed up order. But it was his fault that--well maybe not exactly his-- fault that it wasn't right."
"Right."
"Right! So after that fiasco, I had to hurry home and attend to my collection of--" Rarity looked up to see why her friend had stopped suddenly, and found that she was squinting at a clock on the wall. Then the pink pony looked down at a watch on her ankle. "Aw, poop! Looks like I'll have to go! My watch has been broken this whole time and there's a party planned for--"
Rarity must have shot up from her seat and hauled Pinkie towards the door with brute strength. "Oh, that's just too bad darling! Well, have a good time going to the party now, we'll be right here! Ta Ta! Toodle~Ooo! Bon Voyage!" After tossing her out as gently as one could manage, she trotted back to the table and plopped down. "Ah, yes! Now where were we?"
"A cafe, " He snarked. "Last time I checked."
"Hardy Har Har." Rarity rolled her eyes, trying to determine just what conversation they were having before Pinkie crashed the party.
Chrome faced the slot Pinkie had last been in and sniffed lightly. "What did your friend look like?"
"Hmm?" The mental image of the extremely energetic pony came to mind. "She's...hmm, She's shorter than you by three quarters of a hoof. Her entire coat is bright pink, neon you might say--and she has a cutie make of three balloons. Her eyes are blue, dare I say electric blue...Her mane is...well, eccentric to say the least. Its a poofy, tangled mess of fuscia that resembles cotton candy."
He raised both eyebrows. "She certainly smells like cotton candy."
"It might be a perfume. It goes well with her business. She's the go to party pony in Ponyville. Anything you want, from birthdays to holidays--she can cover it." She thought over the others more and smiled as she remembered their occupations as well. "Come to think of it, my other friends have jobs like that Ponyville. My friend Applejack is one the sole owners of the farmland called Sweet Apple Acres. My pegasus padre Rainbow Dash is a Wonder Bolt and occasional aid to the weather ponies. Fluttershy is an animal care taker with the most lovely assortment of tips if you ever need them. Oh, and there's also Twilight Sparkle, who--"
He blinked. "Twilight Sparkle? As in Twilight Sparkle, Princess of Friendship and headmaster of the School of Friendship?"
Rarity nodded with a fond smile. "Her reputation proceeds her."
"Hmm, I don't buy it. I can believe you being friends with all the other ponies you named, " He shook his head lightly. "But you're stretching things at knowing an actual princess."
She rolled her eyes. "And together, all six of us are probably the most powerful beings in all of Equus."
"Okay, now I know you're pulling my leg."
"You can believe a glowing cutie mark, but not me being a Fashionista, A princess' friend AND a superheroine?"
"Yeah. That's about right."
Rarity could have just left him to believe whatever he wanted to and not cared. Still, part of her wanted to see the smug look on his face when he heard Twilight confirm this for herself. "Alright, Chrome! Finish your meal as soon as possible! And save some room, too."
